What's the dumbest way you've sustained an injury, and what was the injury?
-
Original question by: @[email protected]
I shattered my ankle, separated my tibia and fibula, and broke a different part of my fibula. All in one moment. How, you ask? By stepping outside. My dog pulled too hard on her leash and I stumbled and twisted my ankle in just the right way. Got a fancy Maisonneuve fracture that had to be surgically fixed.
-
Original question by: @[email protected]
Shot my finger with a BB gun. Didn't think I'd pumped it and put my finger over the barrel and pulled the trigger to get the BB out of the chamber. I remember the spurt of blood arcing through the air in slow motion. Gotta love that "oh i fucked up" shift to slow motion.
-
I slipped a disk and pinched a nerve in my neck by sitting up to get out of bed.
When I used to throw out my back regularly it was usually something really innocuous like brushing my teeth or reaching for the faucet when it happened.
What I believe goes on, is over time building up some dysfunctional muscle tension that your unaware of, putting pressure on some vertebra, and it slowly ratchets up over time until its sitting right on the edge and finally it gives way during some minor movement.
-
Original question by: @[email protected]
In middle school, I was playing racquetball at the YMCA, pivoted to hit the ball and something in my knee popped and it hurt like hell. Turned out to be a combination of lack of cartilage and Osgood-Schlatter disease (a painful lump just below the kneecap). The lump corrected itself, as it's something weird to do with bone growth in child development, but the cartilage deficiency is still a problem today. I can't do a lot of running or jumping or even kneeling.
-
On day 3 of a meth bender, non-stop looking at and Photoshopping porn, paralyzed my ulnar nerve by the way my arm was resting on the armrest. Yes, I sat there that long in the same position. Couldn't feel my pinkie and ring finger for a couple of years. No, I haven't done meth in 20 years.
Sliced my forearm open trying to make a small scratch to do a blood brother thing with my gf. My god, I barely got it to stop bleeding. Now I have what looks like a suicide scar. In other news, I was top-tier at sharpening pocket knives back then.
Hit a brick wall, head on, driving my motorcycle drunk, on an unfamiliar street, at night, wearing dark goggles. The bike exploded into fragments, I got a light concussion.
Broke my femur, most crippling injury to date. Knew my motorcycle brakes were far too worn, drove it anyway. Lady slammed her brakes, guy in front of me did same, I tried to do the same, rammed him from behind.
Using a non-locking pocket knife to trim a washer hose. It folded and cut me to the bone, had to have surgery to repair the extensor tendon. Also using a non-locking pocket knife to work on my motorcycle throttle cable, you guessed it, it folded and cut me to the bone. Have had nerve damage in that fingertip since.
Riding my BMX as a kid, decided to try an endo. Slammed the front brakes at speed with predictable results. Knee hit the asphalt to hard it mashed the skin off. Still got the scar, which matches the one on my other knee from swinging over a lava rock.
Got diverticulitis, 3 times, most painful events of my life. Spent years shitting too hard, developed diverticulosis (little tears/pouches in your intestine that catch food and get infected). Surgery fixed it!
Popped a lung after a night of rigorous sex. Yes, I smoked cigarettes and weed. Also, had a lawn service where I inhaled dust all day. Maybe not so much on me though. Doc said it was common among young men and I had two friends blow a lung in those years.
Lately, my feet have been all fucked up from working at Lowe's (I rage quit BTW). Got some new shoes at the thrift, like walking on clouds. Apparently been wearing a size too small for years.
Bruised/broken my ribs several times, broke my right arm twice, countless broken toes and fingers, and perhaps more than the one concussion described above. At this point in the story I've stopped counting scars.
I can keep going. No idea how I survived my 20s without permanent injury or prison time.
wrote on last edited by [email protected]bruh holy shit
-
bruh holy shit
-
Original question by: @[email protected]
I sprained my wrist in my sleep.
-
Original question by: @[email protected]
Tried to cross ice covered river in the middle of winter. Fell in halfway through much to my chagrin. Turns out the ice was a lot less stable farther from the riverbed and I thought after testing the side of the river that the ice was thick enough to hold me. Honestly the walk home was probably the closest I have ever come to dying. I was about an hour walk away from home. My fingers stopped working before I got out of the woods.
-
On day 3 of a meth bender, non-stop looking at and Photoshopping porn, paralyzed my ulnar nerve by the way my arm was resting on the armrest. Yes, I sat there that long in the same position. Couldn't feel my pinkie and ring finger for a couple of years. No, I haven't done meth in 20 years.
Sliced my forearm open trying to make a small scratch to do a blood brother thing with my gf. My god, I barely got it to stop bleeding. Now I have what looks like a suicide scar. In other news, I was top-tier at sharpening pocket knives back then.
Hit a brick wall, head on, driving my motorcycle drunk, on an unfamiliar street, at night, wearing dark goggles. The bike exploded into fragments, I got a light concussion.
Broke my femur, most crippling injury to date. Knew my motorcycle brakes were far too worn, drove it anyway. Lady slammed her brakes, guy in front of me did same, I tried to do the same, rammed him from behind.
Using a non-locking pocket knife to trim a washer hose. It folded and cut me to the bone, had to have surgery to repair the extensor tendon. Also using a non-locking pocket knife to work on my motorcycle throttle cable, you guessed it, it folded and cut me to the bone. Have had nerve damage in that fingertip since.
Riding my BMX as a kid, decided to try an endo. Slammed the front brakes at speed with predictable results. Knee hit the asphalt to hard it mashed the skin off. Still got the scar, which matches the one on my other knee from swinging over a lava rock.
Got diverticulitis, 3 times, most painful events of my life. Spent years shitting too hard, developed diverticulosis (little tears/pouches in your intestine that catch food and get infected). Surgery fixed it!
Popped a lung after a night of rigorous sex. Yes, I smoked cigarettes and weed. Also, had a lawn service where I inhaled dust all day. Maybe not so much on me though. Doc said it was common among young men and I had two friends blow a lung in those years.
Lately, my feet have been all fucked up from working at Lowe's (I rage quit BTW). Got some new shoes at the thrift, like walking on clouds. Apparently been wearing a size too small for years.
Bruised/broken my ribs several times, broke my right arm twice, countless broken toes and fingers, and perhaps more than the one concussion described above. At this point in the story I've stopped counting scars.
I can keep going. No idea how I survived my 20s without permanent injury or prison time.
Dude I know that all of those probably hurt a lot but that sounds like an awesome life.
-
Original question by: @[email protected]
Thought I could/should work through discomfort and then pain at the gym, supersetting overhead push-presses and triceps dips. LOL, nope, gave myself a labral tear and tore my supraspinatus. My shoulder now has an unpleasant popping feeling + significantly less strength when I'm doing anything like a bench press with my elbows properly tucked; I'll likely never be able to do narrow grip bench press or triceps dips again.
Why was this dumb? Because I was a personal trainer, and I fucking know better than to try and push through pain. But I was trying to get back into lifting seriously after losing a lot of time to the pandemic.
-
Original question by: @[email protected]
I'm in California. If you feel the need for a defensive weapon, the most you can get away with is a plain, wooden cane from a drugstore. Even then, if a cop thinks you don't need that cane, you'll get the shit beat out of you and the stick taken away.
Ask me how I know.
-
Out of honest curiosity, is "twisted a nerve" a real diagnosis and a meaningful one, or is it just a colorful way to say you fucked something up in your shoulder?
I've had something that my Dr and the physical therapists called a "pinched nerve" but I understand that basically means "we don't know but assume it's something to do with a nerve because we think we can rule out all the stuff we understand better".
A pinched nerve is a real diagnosis, in that you generally know what happened. But unless there are other red flag symptoms you don't look for the actual cause, because it's really difficult and it only takes two to three days to recover. Usually a symbol of underdeveloped muscles in your back.
-
Original question by: @[email protected]
Tried to open a can with a pair of pliers. Got a nasty cut in the right index finger that had to be stitched.
-
Original question by: @[email protected]
wrote on last edited by [email protected]I cut the edges of the mouth lips (rightmost and leftmost zones) while shaving my beard about two months ago, and I still get microcuts because since the zone is so flexible, it tears every time I open my mouth.
It's not even visible, it's just annoying and painful and not healed yet.
-
On day 3 of a meth bender, non-stop looking at and Photoshopping porn, paralyzed my ulnar nerve by the way my arm was resting on the armrest. Yes, I sat there that long in the same position. Couldn't feel my pinkie and ring finger for a couple of years. No, I haven't done meth in 20 years.
Sliced my forearm open trying to make a small scratch to do a blood brother thing with my gf. My god, I barely got it to stop bleeding. Now I have what looks like a suicide scar. In other news, I was top-tier at sharpening pocket knives back then.
Hit a brick wall, head on, driving my motorcycle drunk, on an unfamiliar street, at night, wearing dark goggles. The bike exploded into fragments, I got a light concussion.
Broke my femur, most crippling injury to date. Knew my motorcycle brakes were far too worn, drove it anyway. Lady slammed her brakes, guy in front of me did same, I tried to do the same, rammed him from behind.
Using a non-locking pocket knife to trim a washer hose. It folded and cut me to the bone, had to have surgery to repair the extensor tendon. Also using a non-locking pocket knife to work on my motorcycle throttle cable, you guessed it, it folded and cut me to the bone. Have had nerve damage in that fingertip since.
Riding my BMX as a kid, decided to try an endo. Slammed the front brakes at speed with predictable results. Knee hit the asphalt to hard it mashed the skin off. Still got the scar, which matches the one on my other knee from swinging over a lava rock.
Got diverticulitis, 3 times, most painful events of my life. Spent years shitting too hard, developed diverticulosis (little tears/pouches in your intestine that catch food and get infected). Surgery fixed it!
Popped a lung after a night of rigorous sex. Yes, I smoked cigarettes and weed. Also, had a lawn service where I inhaled dust all day. Maybe not so much on me though. Doc said it was common among young men and I had two friends blow a lung in those years.
Lately, my feet have been all fucked up from working at Lowe's (I rage quit BTW). Got some new shoes at the thrift, like walking on clouds. Apparently been wearing a size too small for years.
Bruised/broken my ribs several times, broke my right arm twice, countless broken toes and fingers, and perhaps more than the one concussion described above. At this point in the story I've stopped counting scars.
I can keep going. No idea how I survived my 20s without permanent injury or prison time.
You have lived a very full life in a very short time. What are your plans for your retirement (basically anything after right now)?
-
I've broken my pinky toe twice by stubbing it on furniture corners.
wrote on last edited by [email protected]I have also broken my pinky twice on the same doorframe on the way from the lunch table to the Xbox 360 in my aunts house.
A third time I only sprained it if I remember correctly.
Didn't keep me from playing on these days though.
-
Slipped on the sidewalk in the rain and somehow broke an arm (clean broke it). Needed surgery and 2-night hospital stay. This after climbing multiple mountains without a scratch.
That sucks.
Makes me ponder though:
Humans are more or less designed for nature like mountains/dirt trails. I think sidewalks/asphalt while great designs for society and big cities are actually less ideal for the individual human.
Since living in the city I have learned to respect wet manhole covers.
-
Original question by: @[email protected]
I was working with my hands on something and socked myself in the nuts. I think I was deburring a piece of hardened steel and the scraper slipped. It wasn't full wind up and swing but my fist with the scraper had a lot of pressure in and behind it.
I've got plenty of scars and this incident didn't leave one. Not physically. My testicles ache now thinking back on it. Makes me wonder if Mike Tyson ever punched himself in the nuths.
-
You have lived a very full life in a very short time. What are your plans for your retirement (basically anything after right now)?
Meh, I'm a GenX slacker, total failure. My best guess is I'll retire to the Philippines with my Filipino wife, see what social security gets me while I rent my Florida house for something fair. Really want to keep the house for my kid's inheritance, or if I croak, my wife's home.
-
Dude I know that all of those probably hurt a lot but that sounds like an awesome life.
Dad always said he had been shot, stabbed and blown to hell. Like father, like son.
