Would you become romantically involved with someone with vastly different religious views?

[email protected]

Hard to say for sure really.

I can respect someone's religious views as long as they aren't trying to push them on me. That's to say; not trying to make me believe the same or insist that I have to follow the rules of their chosen religion.

As far as my own views go; I don't follow any particular religion. I don't necessarily believe there isn't some form of god, but I don't follow/believe in any specific deity either. Maybe there is, maybe there isn't; but there have been hundreds of thousands of gods/goddesses/deities/religious figures throughout human history. Who's to say you've chosen the correct one, along with the correct set of (sometimes oddly specific) rules and regulations to go along with it?

You want commandments to follow? Here's one:

"Don't be an asshole"

Everything else kind of just falls into place around that. As long as we can respect each other and our differences; yeah, romance is certainly possible.

[email protected]

Not anyone who is actively/strongly religious of any kind. Philosophical/spiritual beliefs is fine with me but anyone who is drinking the Kool-Aid is either delusional or dumb (and probably stubborn/hard to reason with). I was raised Catholic (even went to Catholic school from elementary up to finishing HS) but would consider myself somewhere between agnostic and atheist now

[email protected]

Muslim here and nope. Setting aside that it's forbidden in Islam, I'd have to get them on board with so many things they might as well convert.

[email protected]

I could maybe see myself with a pagan, but it depends on how much woo they believe in.

Luckily, a wonderful atheist woman found me and we've been married going on 10 years now.

[email protected]

Do you live in a country where Muslim religion is assumed or do you have to ask their religion right off? That seems rough

[email protected]

I don't date/wed a religion, or a god. Only a person.

That being said, there would still be the obvious limit that I would have to like (and be liked by) the person which, as far as I'm concerned, would most probably exclude some of the more... extreme religious beliefs.

[email protected]

I'm an immigrant in a country where save for a small foreign diaspora Muslims basically don't exist, so while I'm choosing to leave this stuff for future me to figure out, if I ever do choose to find someone it'll be rough going.

[email protected]

Ouch. That does seem complicated. I wish you luck!

[email protected]

I'm an atheist. I dated a woman once who believed in spirits. I think she experienced night terrors among other things and interpreted them as supernatural phenomena. It didn't cause problems then but I was a lot younger and I think now I'm less tolerant of that sort of thing. But who knows - I was crazy about her so maybe if I meet a woman I'm crazy about like that again then I'll tolerate anything.

More recently I've dated people who believe in a vague sort of life after death but never someone who practiced any religion. I think I would immediately rule out practicing religious people if I were going through a list (as when dating online) but if I met someone in person, really liked her, and then found out she was religious then I'm not sure what I would do. It would definitely be off-putting.

The problem for me isn't the lifestyle differences but rather my impression that religious people are missing the point about the basic nature of existence, when it really should be obvious. It makes me feel like I'm patronizing them, because to be frank I don't tend to think of them as my intellectual equals. (And I know that makes me sound like a pompous jerk.)

[email protected]

Would you turn someone down for believing in heaven/hell/etc alone?

[email protected]

There's already several comments saying "depends on the beliefs and how important they are," and obviously there's that.

I'll add that there are beliefs people don't immediately think of when talking about religion. There's religious humanism, which is a secular religion based around behaving ethically which also has a bunch of traditions similar to spiritually-based religions, minus the spirituality. Adherents (can) attend church and hear sermons on ways to be a better person, etc.

I'm not a religious humanist but they sound like they're probably decent enough people. They're quite different to my generic fediverse atheist/irreligious views, in the sense that I don't have any desire to attend congregations of people who identify as religiously ethical, but I don't harbor any strong objections to their beliefs.

Personally, I understand it more as something that might be nice for people who have left spiritual religion but still want the trappings of a place to go and be with a community of like-minded people, but that's not my experience. Ultimately, that's probably about as far as I'd be comfortable, where we have roughly equivalent spiritual views but highly divergent religious views.

[email protected]

I'll chime in myself here. Am an atheist, have dated hard core Christian women, Wiccans, and atheists. I've found that religion didn't actively impact the relationship until it spilled over into daily life that my partner required I take part in. I actually really enjoyed religious history conversations with my more moderate partners. It started to break down when it was "shut up no debate this is how it is" and those are the relationships that ended badly.

[email protected]

Thank you for this insight! I had no idea myself

[email protected]

Atheist. In general I don't have a problem with religion, as long as it doesn't get uncomfortable. By that I mean stuff like forcing or forbidding me to do stuff. Not believing in basic science is a hard no as well.

But I feel like that's a problem that only part of the world has. Christianity in the U.S is a fucking cult. I don't think I could date anyone from that hardcore believe system. I'm from germany andI am yet to meet a christian that believe in the bullshit parts. Like believing in what the bible says alone is fucking weird to me and pretty much novody exeptfor hardcores does that here.

So I'd say for methe line is at "cult" level

[email protected]

I think the biggest problem is when one partner believes that the other is condemned for eternity in some way (not just a hell, but also other forms like reincarnation to a lower state or anything else deemed bad)...and either they spend the relationship trying to change the other person and probably ruining it, or worse, they accept that fate for someone they claim to love.

As an atheist, I don't have that concern that my loved one is doomed to torment somehow, I just have the here and now to try and make their life with me as pleasant as I can. There is the issue of whether or not an atheist could live with someone whose rational is governed by beliefs that affect their judgement, either like mentioned above trying to convert them for their sake, or in other ways where religion steers them vs. having their own thoughts. But for what I think is a large majority, religious people mostly go through the motions if any just to fill some subconscious uncertainty and it's not enough to threaten a relationship with a differing viewpoint.

The human brain is very good at compartmentalizing things to help us get through the day.

[email protected]

Marry me

[email protected]

My wife was a freeform muslim when we met and we learned a lot from each other, then again she's a very flexible and tolerant being. I was and still am pretty much agnostic I guess. No strong opinion... no horse in the cosmic race

[email protected]

I'm atheist, and my partner was Muslim when I first knew her.

People say it doesn't mater - but honestly it really fucking does.

Imagine being in relationship with someone who never really left North Korea, deep down. There's so much fear, so much fear-driven obedience, and so much fear-driven defense of the indefensible.

I never really understood the concept of freedom of conscience until I was arguing with one of her friends about Amina Lawal, the Nigerian woman sentenced to death by stoning for adultery - with her sentence delayed until her baby was weaned. Despite being really very progressive at heart, my partner ended up arguing in favour of it - and then later on was seriously pissed off at me for making her defend that.

She ended up deconverting several years later (certainly not at my behest), and things got immeasurably better from then on.

But that's not a possibility I'd recommend banking on. My honest advice is just don't go there, it's far more stressful than you think it is.

[email protected]

Yea I kinda get the same feeling. Although for a lot of people their religion does not preclude the acceptation/understanding of a physical world, it's a more of set of rites that they inherited and that's part of their identity. There's plenty of religious people who are scientists. For some, I imagine it may be difficult to reconcile.

[email protected]

who needs tinder when there's lemmy ?

agnos.is Forums

Would you become romantically involved with someone with vastly different religious views?