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Funny

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Lemmy Shitpost
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  • M [email protected]

    I can't see Mormons without thinking of Orgazmo. For a time, it was free on YouTube as well.

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    wrote last edited by
    #37

    The book of Mormon is even better. Legitimately had to force myself to breathe through the laughter.

    M 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • S [email protected]

      It's projection. It never made sense to me until I realized it's all projection. They think gay people are going door to door exactly like they do.

      They go door to door saying "Have you found Christianity? I've chosen to be Christian and I think it's a great way of life. I think you should choose to be Christian, I think you should raise your children to be Christian, I think we should have a Christian society."

      So they just assume everyone else is going door to door "Have you found gayness? I've chosen to be gay and I think it's a great way of life. I think you should choose to be gay, I think you should raise your children to be gay, I think we should have a gay society."

      Which to us is as ridiculous as going door to door "Have you found left handedness? I've chosen to be left handed and I think it's a great way of life. I think you should choose to be left handed, I think you should raise your children to be left handed, I think we should have a left handed society."

      deathray5@lemmynsfw.comD This user is from outside of this forum
      deathray5@lemmynsfw.comD This user is from outside of this forum
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      wrote last edited by
      #38

      "Have you tried gayness" spuds like a good pick up line for pride

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • thebat@lemmy.worldT [email protected]

        I thought it fell apart in the third act.

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        wrote last edited by
        #39

        Oh it had so many problems. I still loved it.

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        • L [email protected]

          True, I’ve never had a gay guy wake me up too damned early on a Saturday to talk about sucking dick. But damn Christian’s keep asking me if I found Jesus. Damn it fuckers just admit you lost at hide n seek already!

          wreckedcarzz@lemmy.worldW This user is from outside of this forum
          wreckedcarzz@lemmy.worldW This user is from outside of this forum
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          wrote last edited by
          #40

          Although if you want someone to talk your ear off about the church of cocks... Never in the morning though, early birds are the work of the devil. Or something like that. Beds are comfy.

          We have by-weekly lunch meet-ups at Liz's Diner over on main too.

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          • obviouslynotbanana@piefed.worldO [email protected]
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            wrote last edited by
            #41

            Do not answer the door in your underwear. Apparently that's a crime.

            F 1 Reply Last reply
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            • M [email protected]

              I can't see Mormons without thinking of Orgazmo. For a time, it was free on YouTube as well.

              B This user is from outside of this forum
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              wrote last edited by
              #42

              Orgazmo sounds like a Hentai villain

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • S [email protected]

                Remember how South Park Kanye reacted to the gay fish joke? This guy right here ☝🏻

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                wrote last edited by
                #43

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • B [email protected]

                  Do not answer the door in your underwear. Apparently that's a crime.

                  F This user is from outside of this forum
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                  wrote last edited by
                  #44

                  No it's not

                  vindictivejudge@lemmy.worldV 1 Reply Last reply
                  2
                  • L [email protected]

                    True, I’ve never had a gay guy wake me up too damned early on a Saturday to talk about sucking dick. But damn Christian’s keep asking me if I found Jesus. Damn it fuckers just admit you lost at hide n seek already!

                    J This user is from outside of this forum
                    J This user is from outside of this forum
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                    wrote last edited by
                    #45

                    I’ve never had a gay guy wake me up too damned early on a Saturday to talk about sucking dick.

                    Skill issue

                    A 1 Reply Last reply
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                    • obviouslynotbanana@piefed.worldO [email protected]
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                      wrote last edited by
                      #46

                      I just hand them SubGenius pamphlets and tell them about the good word of our guru, Saint of Sales, J. R. "Bob" Dobbs.

                      They haven't been back in a while, don't know why...

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                      • J [email protected]

                        I’ve never had a gay guy wake me up too damned early on a Saturday to talk about sucking dick.

                        Skill issue

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                        wrote last edited by
                        #47

                        Tbf I've never had that happen either.

                        It's Saturday night, not "too damn early on a saturday."

                        popekingjoe@lemmy.worldP 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • obviouslynotbanana@piefed.worldO [email protected]
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                          wrote last edited by
                          #48

                          Mormons are so funny, I legit feel bad for all the people who have been traumatized by these weirdos, but like these children are called "elders."

                          They have all these weird rules where premarital sex is totally not permissible, but they be fucking, and then be like "its not sex with a condom on" or of course soaking. Like straight faced "I'm saving myself for marriage," and I'm like "we've had sex 6 times this week, Genevieve."

                          I was at a party in college and this Mormon dude who always did these awkward, overly complicated jive handshakes that felt really violating, was sitting outside upset and depressed holding a half-empty beer. He was like "its all over I've sacrificed everything I believe in, for what? So I can drink a beer at a party??" It was one beer he wasn't even finished with it. Its like relax dude, I'm like 19 and spiraling into alcoholism I think you'll be okay this one time.

                          Ive heard so many horror stories, but I've only had good and very funny experiences with Mormons. And none of this even gets into the magic underwear or like you get your own planet in the afterlife.

                          Idk how people believe in this stuff sober

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                          • obviouslynotbanana@piefed.worldO [email protected]
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                            wrote last edited by
                            #49

                            Projections gonna project

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • O [email protected]

                              I believe everybody is bisexual at first

                              Then you're bisexual. If your "first" instinct was that both genders could be attractive, you're bisexual. But societal pressure convinced you to only seek out heterosexual relationships.

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                              wrote last edited by [email protected]
                              #50

                              Also just because you have fantasies at some point, doesn't mean you will follow the and they won't "go away" in the future. That's just your brain trying to figure out the unclean mess that sexual orientation is.

                              F 1 Reply Last reply
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                              • obviouslynotbanana@piefed.worldO [email protected]
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                                wrote last edited by
                                #51

                                Every accusation is a confession

                                1 Reply Last reply
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                                • F [email protected]

                                  No it's not

                                  vindictivejudge@lemmy.worldV This user is from outside of this forum
                                  vindictivejudge@lemmy.worldV This user is from outside of this forum
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                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #52

                                  Likely depends on jurisdiction. Should be legal in Oregon. Less sure about Missouri.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • A [email protected]

                                    Tbf I've never had that happen either.

                                    It's Saturday night, not "too damn early on a saturday."

                                    popekingjoe@lemmy.worldP This user is from outside of this forum
                                    popekingjoe@lemmy.worldP This user is from outside of this forum
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                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #53

                                    Yeah I think that's a perfectly appropriate time. Any time before noon on a weekend is just too early man.

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                                    • O [email protected]

                                      ...I'm so gonna go door to door with pamphlets on gayness.

                                      heythisisnttheymca@lemmy.worldH This user is from outside of this forum
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                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #54

                                      can we talk about our lord and saviour prostate orgasming

                                      I 1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • obviouslynotbanana@piefed.worldO [email protected]
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                                        wrote last edited by [email protected]
                                        #55

                                        Please remember, they are not there to convince you of their faith! They are there to be rejected. They sent out 18yos with a up until that point unknown other 18yo person to a far away place, then tell each other them that they should look after each other. So now they effectively spy on each other and know their only "friend" in that situation is expecting them to behave like a good elder. Then they were told that the outside world is rejecting god as it was corrupted by the devil and now they are running around and approaching random houses and bother the people living there, which will obviously mostly reject them.

                                        This is fucking brainwashing.

                                        Look up the BITE model...

                                        • Behavior: imagine living with only 1 person that you are supposed to spent your whole day with and that person spies on you and you know it.
                                        • Information: the mission is supposed to prove that the outside world rejects them
                                        • Thought: you are supposed to focus on the mission and god alone.
                                        • Emotion: fear based indoctrination by being told that the world rejects them and their only support is a member of the organization.

                                        It is fucking cultish

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                                        • S [email protected]

                                          The book of Mormon is even better. Legitimately had to force myself to breathe through the laughter.

                                          M This user is from outside of this forum
                                          M This user is from outside of this forum
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                                          wrote last edited by [email protected]
                                          #56

                                          I did find a cam recording on YouTube. Haven't watched it yet because I don't want to spoil my appetite. (I think there's a Sydney performance in 2026. Will wait for that)

                                          Weather update. Its actually playing in 2025 in Sydney, so I can go right now, but they are selling the tickets in pairs* and its close to 300 AUD for the mediocre seats. Is that normal for Broadway tickets?

                                          *Turns out the hardest part will be finding someone to go with...

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