Is it a bad idea to let my kid's friends rent from me and live in my house?
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edit: OK, I think this blog post that /u/NebLem linked decides it. Hard line at "not a rooming house" but I don't want you to sleep outside tonight.
ORIGINAL:
I remember when I was a kid and on hard times I was taken in by a friend and his dad. It saved me from being on the streets. This sort of situation seems to be developing now that I'm middle aged and my young adult children have friends with less than stable home lives. All these kids are LGBTQ or adjacent, some have diagnosed mental illness.
I want to help, but man... what happens if it goes sideways? I would hate to throw someone out if personal problems got too much. We have the space and these kids are over here all the time anyway, they just don't have a room and don't pay anything. Made some pretty kickass food last night though. Money is starting to get pretty tight what with food prices increasing, my insurance just went up, yadda yadda. I was thinking something like $500/mo since I'm already paying for everything, this money would of course help. Seems like two, maybe three kids need shelter.
To be clear, it isn't imminent but probably by October. So let's see what Lemmy thinks I should do:
1: No, we will not run a rooming house.
2: Yes, but. You don't have to pay money and are still a house guest. Please continue to pick up after yourself and buy food when you can.
3: Yes, I will create a few private areas in my basement and you pay me rent. We will be roommates but it's still my and my wife's house.
edit: looks like I would definitely need a formal lease as soon as someone brings a suitcase in for more than a night.
Colorado: Guests become tenants after staying for over 14 days within six months
sounds like I already have a couple tenants.
I think it's great that you're willing to offer help to those in need. $500/mo is enough to really help you out with expenses, but likely cheaper than they're able to find elsewhere. Especially considering that the environment is supportive and safe for them.
That being said, I would strongly recommend getting them to sign well-defined contracts that you get from a real-estate lawyer to help shield you in the case of it turning sour.
My coworker just got finished with a year-long legal battle trying to kick out someone that he allowed to bunk in a spare room for a few months (completely free). Despite them not paying room or board they were classified as tenants and therefore had legal protection that they took every advantage of and made my co-worker's life hell. I'm all for strong tenant protections, but there's always going to be the exceptions that abuse the system. I would follow your heart on the payment side, but insist on contracts to protect your livelihood. Don't let a good deed ruin you.
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Colorado is very friendly to tenants, not landlords.
Not as friendly as California
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Don't do business with family, or friends.
I have issues with Dave Ramsey, but he's often got solid financial advice. One thing that stuck with me was his oft repeated mantra; Never loan money to family and friends, gift them money. If they pay it back, great! If not, you had no expectation that they would.
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I think it's great that you're willing to offer help to those in need. $500/mo is enough to really help you out with expenses, but likely cheaper than they're able to find elsewhere. Especially considering that the environment is supportive and safe for them.
That being said, I would strongly recommend getting them to sign well-defined contracts that you get from a real-estate lawyer to help shield you in the case of it turning sour.
My coworker just got finished with a year-long legal battle trying to kick out someone that he allowed to bunk in a spare room for a few months (completely free). Despite them not paying room or board they were classified as tenants and therefore had legal protection that they took every advantage of and made my co-worker's life hell. I'm all for strong tenant protections, but there's always going to be the exceptions that abuse the system. I would follow your heart on the payment side, but insist on contracts to protect your livelihood. Don't let a good deed ruin you.
Imo, landlord-tenant law should really differentiate between small landlords (like OP is considering being) and corporate landlords. Small landlords, who may often have a personal connection with their tenants, are typically the people most open to housing people who are square pegs, unable to fit into corporate housing's round hole. But they see horror stories like this and decide it isn't worth the risk. It seems like common sense to me that someone who owns a home and rents out a room to a friend of a friend who has fallen on hard times should be able to kick that person out if they turn out to be a giant dick.
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edit: OK, I think this blog post that /u/NebLem linked decides it. Hard line at "not a rooming house" but I don't want you to sleep outside tonight.
ORIGINAL:
I remember when I was a kid and on hard times I was taken in by a friend and his dad. It saved me from being on the streets. This sort of situation seems to be developing now that I'm middle aged and my young adult children have friends with less than stable home lives. All these kids are LGBTQ or adjacent, some have diagnosed mental illness.
I want to help, but man... what happens if it goes sideways? I would hate to throw someone out if personal problems got too much. We have the space and these kids are over here all the time anyway, they just don't have a room and don't pay anything. Made some pretty kickass food last night though. Money is starting to get pretty tight what with food prices increasing, my insurance just went up, yadda yadda. I was thinking something like $500/mo since I'm already paying for everything, this money would of course help. Seems like two, maybe three kids need shelter.
To be clear, it isn't imminent but probably by October. So let's see what Lemmy thinks I should do:
1: No, we will not run a rooming house.
2: Yes, but. You don't have to pay money and are still a house guest. Please continue to pick up after yourself and buy food when you can.
3: Yes, I will create a few private areas in my basement and you pay me rent. We will be roommates but it's still my and my wife's house.
edit: looks like I would definitely need a formal lease as soon as someone brings a suitcase in for more than a night.
Colorado: Guests become tenants after staying for over 14 days within six months
sounds like I already have a couple tenants.
It's kind of a housing trolley problem. Once the person has worn out their welcome will you have the ability to put your foot down? Because doing so will feel like you are the one putting them out on the street. Some may even call you an enabler.
I am generally in favor of giving people a chance to do the right thing, but this is one of those classic situations where it almost seems like there is no positive outcome possible. Even if they get back on their feet with your help, at what point can you say "hey sorry, but you are doing so well I'm going to make you go spend three as much on on your own housing." That's honestly the best outcome and it's still kind of a shitty situation you probably won't feel good about. Worst case scenario, the relationship devolves and the person vandalizes your property and your insurance won't cover intentional damage.
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That saying is cool ! What is the original version ? Here, one of the main saying is "good accounting makes good friends", and i clearly prefer yours.
Also got here the “friends, friends, business is discussed separately”
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edit: OK, I think this blog post that /u/NebLem linked decides it. Hard line at "not a rooming house" but I don't want you to sleep outside tonight.
ORIGINAL:
I remember when I was a kid and on hard times I was taken in by a friend and his dad. It saved me from being on the streets. This sort of situation seems to be developing now that I'm middle aged and my young adult children have friends with less than stable home lives. All these kids are LGBTQ or adjacent, some have diagnosed mental illness.
I want to help, but man... what happens if it goes sideways? I would hate to throw someone out if personal problems got too much. We have the space and these kids are over here all the time anyway, they just don't have a room and don't pay anything. Made some pretty kickass food last night though. Money is starting to get pretty tight what with food prices increasing, my insurance just went up, yadda yadda. I was thinking something like $500/mo since I'm already paying for everything, this money would of course help. Seems like two, maybe three kids need shelter.
To be clear, it isn't imminent but probably by October. So let's see what Lemmy thinks I should do:
1: No, we will not run a rooming house.
2: Yes, but. You don't have to pay money and are still a house guest. Please continue to pick up after yourself and buy food when you can.
3: Yes, I will create a few private areas in my basement and you pay me rent. We will be roommates but it's still my and my wife's house.
edit: looks like I would definitely need a formal lease as soon as someone brings a suitcase in for more than a night.
Colorado: Guests become tenants after staying for over 14 days within six months
sounds like I already have a couple tenants.
Or maybe realize that we are in the middle of a housing crisis and help your kids that will never have the quality of life that was handed to you?
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We have a saying that translates roughly to: friendship ends at the money.
So: Don't.
Give them for free as much as possible. Make your money from other sources.
wrote last edited by [email protected]I feel this but considering the economic situation, if I was the house guest, I would want to contribute to the house. So maybe not foe the OP to ask for money, but I hope the kids are able to contribute some because times is hard. I wouldn't turn down money if it was offered.
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edit: OK, I think this blog post that /u/NebLem linked decides it. Hard line at "not a rooming house" but I don't want you to sleep outside tonight.
ORIGINAL:
I remember when I was a kid and on hard times I was taken in by a friend and his dad. It saved me from being on the streets. This sort of situation seems to be developing now that I'm middle aged and my young adult children have friends with less than stable home lives. All these kids are LGBTQ or adjacent, some have diagnosed mental illness.
I want to help, but man... what happens if it goes sideways? I would hate to throw someone out if personal problems got too much. We have the space and these kids are over here all the time anyway, they just don't have a room and don't pay anything. Made some pretty kickass food last night though. Money is starting to get pretty tight what with food prices increasing, my insurance just went up, yadda yadda. I was thinking something like $500/mo since I'm already paying for everything, this money would of course help. Seems like two, maybe three kids need shelter.
To be clear, it isn't imminent but probably by October. So let's see what Lemmy thinks I should do:
1: No, we will not run a rooming house.
2: Yes, but. You don't have to pay money and are still a house guest. Please continue to pick up after yourself and buy food when you can.
3: Yes, I will create a few private areas in my basement and you pay me rent. We will be roommates but it's still my and my wife's house.
edit: looks like I would definitely need a formal lease as soon as someone brings a suitcase in for more than a night.
Colorado: Guests become tenants after staying for over 14 days within six months
sounds like I already have a couple tenants.
Not sure how it is over there but in The Netherlands in a situation like that it would be difficult to have them leave because you are not allowed to just kick them out without a very good reason (to protect the tenants). So if there are any problems or you changed your mind (at least here) you'd be stuck with them if they refused to leave.
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edit: OK, I think this blog post that /u/NebLem linked decides it. Hard line at "not a rooming house" but I don't want you to sleep outside tonight.
ORIGINAL:
I remember when I was a kid and on hard times I was taken in by a friend and his dad. It saved me from being on the streets. This sort of situation seems to be developing now that I'm middle aged and my young adult children have friends with less than stable home lives. All these kids are LGBTQ or adjacent, some have diagnosed mental illness.
I want to help, but man... what happens if it goes sideways? I would hate to throw someone out if personal problems got too much. We have the space and these kids are over here all the time anyway, they just don't have a room and don't pay anything. Made some pretty kickass food last night though. Money is starting to get pretty tight what with food prices increasing, my insurance just went up, yadda yadda. I was thinking something like $500/mo since I'm already paying for everything, this money would of course help. Seems like two, maybe three kids need shelter.
To be clear, it isn't imminent but probably by October. So let's see what Lemmy thinks I should do:
1: No, we will not run a rooming house.
2: Yes, but. You don't have to pay money and are still a house guest. Please continue to pick up after yourself and buy food when you can.
3: Yes, I will create a few private areas in my basement and you pay me rent. We will be roommates but it's still my and my wife's house.
edit: looks like I would definitely need a formal lease as soon as someone brings a suitcase in for more than a night.
Colorado: Guests become tenants after staying for over 14 days within six months
sounds like I already have a couple tenants.
if they are renting and not free-loading, shouldnt be a problem, or you concerned about privacy.
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Or maybe realize that we are in the middle of a housing crisis and help your kids that will never have the quality of life that was handed to you?
What the fuck? I'm doing that. I'm supporting two young adults completely, food, car for commuting to the fucking college I'm paying for SO THEY DON'T HAVE DEBT.
So back the fuck up.
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if they are renting and not free-loading, shouldnt be a problem, or you concerned about privacy.
No, concerned about the legal issues brought up in this thread and about my relationship with my kids. Also the relationships they have with these friends.
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I feel this but considering the economic situation, if I was the house guest, I would want to contribute to the house. So maybe not foe the OP to ask for money, but I hope the kids are able to contribute some because times is hard. I wouldn't turn down money if it was offered.
wrote last edited by [email protected]They already contribute, so I think they"get it".
Ran out of laundry detergent about a month ago so the main girl that's been staying here went to the store and got the big container we always use
It wouldn't even a big deal but she just went when I mentioned we ran out
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What the fuck? I'm doing that. I'm supporting two young adults completely, food, car for commuting to the fucking college I'm paying for SO THEY DON'T HAVE DEBT.
So back the fuck up.
whatever boomer
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whatever boomer
Suck my pollution doomer
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edit: OK, I think this blog post that /u/NebLem linked decides it. Hard line at "not a rooming house" but I don't want you to sleep outside tonight.
ORIGINAL:
I remember when I was a kid and on hard times I was taken in by a friend and his dad. It saved me from being on the streets. This sort of situation seems to be developing now that I'm middle aged and my young adult children have friends with less than stable home lives. All these kids are LGBTQ or adjacent, some have diagnosed mental illness.
I want to help, but man... what happens if it goes sideways? I would hate to throw someone out if personal problems got too much. We have the space and these kids are over here all the time anyway, they just don't have a room and don't pay anything. Made some pretty kickass food last night though. Money is starting to get pretty tight what with food prices increasing, my insurance just went up, yadda yadda. I was thinking something like $500/mo since I'm already paying for everything, this money would of course help. Seems like two, maybe three kids need shelter.
To be clear, it isn't imminent but probably by October. So let's see what Lemmy thinks I should do:
1: No, we will not run a rooming house.
2: Yes, but. You don't have to pay money and are still a house guest. Please continue to pick up after yourself and buy food when you can.
3: Yes, I will create a few private areas in my basement and you pay me rent. We will be roommates but it's still my and my wife's house.
edit: looks like I would definitely need a formal lease as soon as someone brings a suitcase in for more than a night.
Colorado: Guests become tenants after staying for over 14 days within six months
sounds like I already have a couple tenants.
It's just business. If they weren't renting from you, they'd be renting from someone else.
