smart bed
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Unplug it, you techbro-adjacent dumb bitch
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I want a bed that can cool itself. That sounds awesome. But make it work "stupidly" instead of being "smart."
You want a water bed. But be careful, they get COLD.
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You want a water bed. But be careful, they get COLD.
Waterbeds suck, honestly. They're great for people who have a very consistent body temp and don't have a partner. Get warm or cold in the middle of the night? Tough, it takes ages to change the temp of a huge mass of water. Partner with a different comfort zone? Too bad.
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The cold, temperpedic truth.
his joke but less
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This post did not contain any content.wrote on last edited by [email protected]
Look at this dumb asshole that got the $2500-2600 (assuming queen mattress) plus $17/mo or 199/yr subscription mattress cover (eg not the actual fucking mattress or bed frame). What a broke piece of shit. Should’ve gotten the $2850-2950 pod 6
After briefly googling what this actually is and the costs involved I have 0 sympathy for anyone involved. This is 100% tech bro bullshit. A temperature controlled bed sounds neat, I guess, and I am always a sucker for analytics, but this is possibly the most consumer hostile bullshit I have ever seen. It is all of the worst practices of modern tech wrapped into a device:
Grossly overpriced? Check
$350 upsell for physical controls? Check
Tons of vague language about health benefits that extrapolate valid claims onto their product, suggesting their product has benefits beyond something far cheaper (eg temperature does impact sleep but a $10 fan or $150 window unit would likely be fine because research is generally about environment and not about the surface of the bed)? Zero research about the device itself and zero funding for them to get this product investigated? Check
Subscription required? Not technically, core functionality still works, but you lose all the analytics, all the “smart adjustments” of temperature (it basically will just hold a constant temperature throughout the night whereas the subscription will adjust it gradually based on movement) and the biggest point is that your warranty is voided and you lose all support if you don’t maintain a subscription
Also while I don’t know this for sure I am betting there is 0 chance that you can fix this thing if it breaks.
This thing is so dumb and if you buy it I will judge you. You could buy a 2001 Honda accord LX with 141,000 miles. for that price. That’s a reliable car. I had one and drove it to 200k, sold it and I’m sure it ran for a while longer. Maintain it well and you’ll get 250-300k out of that bad boy. Meanwhile your dumb water bed cover will break and leak all over which is apparently so bad people all worry about all the posts theyve seen about leaking and the social media team has to come share blog post about how they make them less shitty now. sorry if you got the first batch, i guess. But it’s okay because as dumb redditors point out you can give them another $500 to extend the warranty to 5 years. Just remember to keep that subscription active or that warranty is void you stupid piece of shit.
you still need a fucking mattress! You know someone buying this isn’t throwing it on a $400 ikea mattress. They’re going for the $3200 foam mattress. I am so mad about this
Edit: it also sells the biometric data its harvests about you to advertisers. Reddit posts show it uploads anywhere from 10-30gb of data per month, so it’s collecting quite a bit of data
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AI controlled bed
Looks inside: A bunch of
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Waterbeds suck, honestly. They're great for people who have a very consistent body temp and don't have a partner. Get warm or cold in the middle of the night? Tough, it takes ages to change the temp of a huge mass of water. Partner with a different comfort zone? Too bad.
also they weigh a literal ton, so you have to be sure your floor can handle it.
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Look at this dumb asshole that got the $2500-2600 (assuming queen mattress) plus $17/mo or 199/yr subscription mattress cover (eg not the actual fucking mattress or bed frame). What a broke piece of shit. Should’ve gotten the $2850-2950 pod 6
After briefly googling what this actually is and the costs involved I have 0 sympathy for anyone involved. This is 100% tech bro bullshit. A temperature controlled bed sounds neat, I guess, and I am always a sucker for analytics, but this is possibly the most consumer hostile bullshit I have ever seen. It is all of the worst practices of modern tech wrapped into a device:
Grossly overpriced? Check
$350 upsell for physical controls? Check
Tons of vague language about health benefits that extrapolate valid claims onto their product, suggesting their product has benefits beyond something far cheaper (eg temperature does impact sleep but a $10 fan or $150 window unit would likely be fine because research is generally about environment and not about the surface of the bed)? Zero research about the device itself and zero funding for them to get this product investigated? Check
Subscription required? Not technically, core functionality still works, but you lose all the analytics, all the “smart adjustments” of temperature (it basically will just hold a constant temperature throughout the night whereas the subscription will adjust it gradually based on movement) and the biggest point is that your warranty is voided and you lose all support if you don’t maintain a subscription
Also while I don’t know this for sure I am betting there is 0 chance that you can fix this thing if it breaks.
This thing is so dumb and if you buy it I will judge you. You could buy a 2001 Honda accord LX with 141,000 miles. for that price. That’s a reliable car. I had one and drove it to 200k, sold it and I’m sure it ran for a while longer. Maintain it well and you’ll get 250-300k out of that bad boy. Meanwhile your dumb water bed cover will break and leak all over which is apparently so bad people all worry about all the posts theyve seen about leaking and the social media team has to come share blog post about how they make them less shitty now. sorry if you got the first batch, i guess. But it’s okay because as dumb redditors point out you can give them another $500 to extend the warranty to 5 years. Just remember to keep that subscription active or that warranty is void you stupid piece of shit.
you still need a fucking mattress! You know someone buying this isn’t throwing it on a $400 ikea mattress. They’re going for the $3200 foam mattress. I am so mad about this
Edit: it also sells the biometric data its harvests about you to advertisers. Reddit posts show it uploads anywhere from 10-30gb of data per month, so it’s collecting quite a bit of data
wrote on last edited by [email protected]While the IKEA mattress is fine for you or me, I really don't think this smart mattress is actually that expensive. I believe 5k and up is still relatively common for a high quality mattress.
When you annualise it over 10 years and between two people, if they're getting better sleep than they would have otherwise, who are we to judge how they spend their money? It's actually not that bad in terms of value. There are nights in the summer where I would gladly pay €200 to not be sweating into the sheets.
Obviously, relying on a company for an app to control your bed is the idiotic part. But the price itself is not outrageous for me.
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https://www.eightsleep.com/product/pod-cover/
It's real. I was legitimately expecting to feel foolish for believing it.
There's one born every minute.
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also they weigh a literal ton, so you have to be sure your floor can handle it.
Oh, right, I forgot about that aspect.
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While the IKEA mattress is fine for you or me, I really don't think this smart mattress is actually that expensive. I believe 5k and up is still relatively common for a high quality mattress.
When you annualise it over 10 years and between two people, if they're getting better sleep than they would have otherwise, who are we to judge how they spend their money? It's actually not that bad in terms of value. There are nights in the summer where I would gladly pay €200 to not be sweating into the sheets.
Obviously, relying on a company for an app to control your bed is the idiotic part. But the price itself is not outrageous for me.
Sorry, there is no quality difference in mattresses
that would warrant price difference above a few hundred dollars. This simple hasn't been true for almost two decades. No mattress should cost $5000. -
While the IKEA mattress is fine for you or me, I really don't think this smart mattress is actually that expensive. I believe 5k and up is still relatively common for a high quality mattress.
When you annualise it over 10 years and between two people, if they're getting better sleep than they would have otherwise, who are we to judge how they spend their money? It's actually not that bad in terms of value. There are nights in the summer where I would gladly pay €200 to not be sweating into the sheets.
Obviously, relying on a company for an app to control your bed is the idiotic part. But the price itself is not outrageous for me.
wrote on last edited by [email protected]So I wrote a lot of word salad there and maybe this point got lost:
This device is not a mattress
It is a mattress topper
So you buy your bougie $2500 mattress (because of course someone buying this is not cheaping out on a mattress) and fancy bed frame. Then you spend another $3000 on this. Then *another * 200ish dollars a year, in perpetuity, to make it work (not including electrical costs and water)
But at that point why not pay >€200 for a window unit air conditioner and the >€1 in electricity for the day to run it overnight? If you don’t have a window that can accommodate you can get ones that stand in the room. A dehumidifier. A fan. None of these require apps or subscriptions (yet), cost substantially less, and again the research about sleep temperature is about the environment, not the bed itself
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I want a bed that can cool itself. That sounds awesome. But make it work "stupidly" instead of being "smart."
You want a bedjet. I have one, Iove it.
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Look at this dumb asshole that got the $2500-2600 (assuming queen mattress) plus $17/mo or 199/yr subscription mattress cover (eg not the actual fucking mattress or bed frame). What a broke piece of shit. Should’ve gotten the $2850-2950 pod 6
After briefly googling what this actually is and the costs involved I have 0 sympathy for anyone involved. This is 100% tech bro bullshit. A temperature controlled bed sounds neat, I guess, and I am always a sucker for analytics, but this is possibly the most consumer hostile bullshit I have ever seen. It is all of the worst practices of modern tech wrapped into a device:
Grossly overpriced? Check
$350 upsell for physical controls? Check
Tons of vague language about health benefits that extrapolate valid claims onto their product, suggesting their product has benefits beyond something far cheaper (eg temperature does impact sleep but a $10 fan or $150 window unit would likely be fine because research is generally about environment and not about the surface of the bed)? Zero research about the device itself and zero funding for them to get this product investigated? Check
Subscription required? Not technically, core functionality still works, but you lose all the analytics, all the “smart adjustments” of temperature (it basically will just hold a constant temperature throughout the night whereas the subscription will adjust it gradually based on movement) and the biggest point is that your warranty is voided and you lose all support if you don’t maintain a subscription
Also while I don’t know this for sure I am betting there is 0 chance that you can fix this thing if it breaks.
This thing is so dumb and if you buy it I will judge you. You could buy a 2001 Honda accord LX with 141,000 miles. for that price. That’s a reliable car. I had one and drove it to 200k, sold it and I’m sure it ran for a while longer. Maintain it well and you’ll get 250-300k out of that bad boy. Meanwhile your dumb water bed cover will break and leak all over which is apparently so bad people all worry about all the posts theyve seen about leaking and the social media team has to come share blog post about how they make them less shitty now. sorry if you got the first batch, i guess. But it’s okay because as dumb redditors point out you can give them another $500 to extend the warranty to 5 years. Just remember to keep that subscription active or that warranty is void you stupid piece of shit.
you still need a fucking mattress! You know someone buying this isn’t throwing it on a $400 ikea mattress. They’re going for the $3200 foam mattress. I am so mad about this
Edit: it also sells the biometric data its harvests about you to advertisers. Reddit posts show it uploads anywhere from 10-30gb of data per month, so it’s collecting quite a bit of data
No warranty without a subscription should be illegal
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So I wrote a lot of word salad there and maybe this point got lost:
This device is not a mattress
It is a mattress topper
So you buy your bougie $2500 mattress (because of course someone buying this is not cheaping out on a mattress) and fancy bed frame. Then you spend another $3000 on this. Then *another * 200ish dollars a year, in perpetuity, to make it work (not including electrical costs and water)
But at that point why not pay >€200 for a window unit air conditioner and the >€1 in electricity for the day to run it overnight? If you don’t have a window that can accommodate you can get ones that stand in the room. A dehumidifier. A fan. None of these require apps or subscriptions (yet), cost substantially less, and again the research about sleep temperature is about the environment, not the bed itself
They sell a mattress as well. It’s a bit more integrated.
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You want a water bed. But be careful, they get COLD.
There was a girl at university that had a water bed and when I was in it I could not get out of it, you just sort of flop around in the middle. Also you have to faff around with special insurance, and get special sheets.
Not worth it.
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Look at this dumb asshole that got the $2500-2600 (assuming queen mattress) plus $17/mo or 199/yr subscription mattress cover (eg not the actual fucking mattress or bed frame). What a broke piece of shit. Should’ve gotten the $2850-2950 pod 6
After briefly googling what this actually is and the costs involved I have 0 sympathy for anyone involved. This is 100% tech bro bullshit. A temperature controlled bed sounds neat, I guess, and I am always a sucker for analytics, but this is possibly the most consumer hostile bullshit I have ever seen. It is all of the worst practices of modern tech wrapped into a device:
Grossly overpriced? Check
$350 upsell for physical controls? Check
Tons of vague language about health benefits that extrapolate valid claims onto their product, suggesting their product has benefits beyond something far cheaper (eg temperature does impact sleep but a $10 fan or $150 window unit would likely be fine because research is generally about environment and not about the surface of the bed)? Zero research about the device itself and zero funding for them to get this product investigated? Check
Subscription required? Not technically, core functionality still works, but you lose all the analytics, all the “smart adjustments” of temperature (it basically will just hold a constant temperature throughout the night whereas the subscription will adjust it gradually based on movement) and the biggest point is that your warranty is voided and you lose all support if you don’t maintain a subscription
Also while I don’t know this for sure I am betting there is 0 chance that you can fix this thing if it breaks.
This thing is so dumb and if you buy it I will judge you. You could buy a 2001 Honda accord LX with 141,000 miles. for that price. That’s a reliable car. I had one and drove it to 200k, sold it and I’m sure it ran for a while longer. Maintain it well and you’ll get 250-300k out of that bad boy. Meanwhile your dumb water bed cover will break and leak all over which is apparently so bad people all worry about all the posts theyve seen about leaking and the social media team has to come share blog post about how they make them less shitty now. sorry if you got the first batch, i guess. But it’s okay because as dumb redditors point out you can give them another $500 to extend the warranty to 5 years. Just remember to keep that subscription active or that warranty is void you stupid piece of shit.
you still need a fucking mattress! You know someone buying this isn’t throwing it on a $400 ikea mattress. They’re going for the $3200 foam mattress. I am so mad about this
Edit: it also sells the biometric data its harvests about you to advertisers. Reddit posts show it uploads anywhere from 10-30gb of data per month, so it’s collecting quite a bit of data
I have one of these and it’s one of the best purchases I’ve ever made. You don’t have to believe me. In any case, it just runs off of a Linux computer. You can install OSS firmware on it.
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Look at this dumb asshole that got the $2500-2600 (assuming queen mattress) plus $17/mo or 199/yr subscription mattress cover (eg not the actual fucking mattress or bed frame). What a broke piece of shit. Should’ve gotten the $2850-2950 pod 6
After briefly googling what this actually is and the costs involved I have 0 sympathy for anyone involved. This is 100% tech bro bullshit. A temperature controlled bed sounds neat, I guess, and I am always a sucker for analytics, but this is possibly the most consumer hostile bullshit I have ever seen. It is all of the worst practices of modern tech wrapped into a device:
Grossly overpriced? Check
$350 upsell for physical controls? Check
Tons of vague language about health benefits that extrapolate valid claims onto their product, suggesting their product has benefits beyond something far cheaper (eg temperature does impact sleep but a $10 fan or $150 window unit would likely be fine because research is generally about environment and not about the surface of the bed)? Zero research about the device itself and zero funding for them to get this product investigated? Check
Subscription required? Not technically, core functionality still works, but you lose all the analytics, all the “smart adjustments” of temperature (it basically will just hold a constant temperature throughout the night whereas the subscription will adjust it gradually based on movement) and the biggest point is that your warranty is voided and you lose all support if you don’t maintain a subscription
Also while I don’t know this for sure I am betting there is 0 chance that you can fix this thing if it breaks.
This thing is so dumb and if you buy it I will judge you. You could buy a 2001 Honda accord LX with 141,000 miles. for that price. That’s a reliable car. I had one and drove it to 200k, sold it and I’m sure it ran for a while longer. Maintain it well and you’ll get 250-300k out of that bad boy. Meanwhile your dumb water bed cover will break and leak all over which is apparently so bad people all worry about all the posts theyve seen about leaking and the social media team has to come share blog post about how they make them less shitty now. sorry if you got the first batch, i guess. But it’s okay because as dumb redditors point out you can give them another $500 to extend the warranty to 5 years. Just remember to keep that subscription active or that warranty is void you stupid piece of shit.
you still need a fucking mattress! You know someone buying this isn’t throwing it on a $400 ikea mattress. They’re going for the $3200 foam mattress. I am so mad about this
Edit: it also sells the biometric data its harvests about you to advertisers. Reddit posts show it uploads anywhere from 10-30gb of data per month, so it’s collecting quite a bit of data
Isn't he some semi-famous tech YouTuber? I would be surprised if he actually had bought this product.
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The cold, temperpedic truth.
his joke but more
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I want a bed that can cool itself. That sounds awesome. But make it work "stupidly" instead of being "smart."
Buy some decent, quiet, pc fans and sew a wrap-around sheet, with holes at the foot end just for the small fans to nestle into. The idea is you lay on the bottom part, the top part is over you with whatever other light blankets, and the fans are by your feet, ideally one for each side with an on/off switch. They blow cool air into the sheets and help evaporate moisture. It’s the same idea as a lot of very expensive machines.
Build a small frame to securely hold the fans, ensure no obstructions, and hold the end of the airflow sheet, put the power supply somewhere far away, and you’ve basically built a $400+ cooling bed.
