Not stealing
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There is a reason for declining child birth numbers... it has everything to do with more people knowing what they are really getting into.
I don't really follow your train of thought. People would have been just as aware (if not more, due to the prevalence of multigenerational households) of this in the past as they are now, no?
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This thread has reminded me of why I don't want kids.
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I’m so feeling this this morning. I asked the 4yo if he wanted cereal or yogurt for breakfast. He screams “I’m not hungry! I want mama!”, runs to his room and slams the door. Two minutes later he comes out and punches me in the dick while I’m making lunches.
I am cracking up at this. Please save this comment word-for-word in a journal or something. Because when he's older and truly appreciates all you've done for him you're going to find it even funnier than I did to remind him of this!
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And I'm always picking what he's least likely to want.
So parents can be assholes too.
I'm not a total asshole: After he's had his "oh shit" moment I give him one more chance to choose. He's usually a lot better at picking one of the two options on his second try.
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I don't really follow your train of thought. People would have been just as aware (if not more, due to the prevalence of multigenerational households) of this in the past as they are now, no?
In the past people didn't have access to a device with endless information about how rough it is the raise kids. Instead they had other local parents as a source, and those parents just wanted company in thier misery.
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I think it's time. you gotta sacrifice the strategy because 11 is old enough to know acab
He's autistic, and that concept is not something he could grasp yet.
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This very much could have been my husband about a decade ago. The last tantrum my middle child ever threw, with lots of screaming and running and destroying things like a fucking tornado in the middle of a Target. Spouse carried them kicking and screaming out to the car while I finished checking out and by the time I got there they were buckled in their car seat, completely calm and composed, like a switch flipped. (As far as I know) it wasn't any sort of punishment or shining moment of parenting, the kid just decided, I'm done now.
And they haven't thrown a fit since.
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My first kid was a perfect baby, she’d sleep 10 hours straight, she was quiet and never bratty, we would take her to restaurants with all our adult friends and she was always well behaved and didn’t need a tablet and would interact with everyone. We used to silently judge leash kid’s parents with the wife.
Then we had our second, an autistic boy with the energy of a thousand suns. Now I know, the leash isnt for me, it’s for all of you! The tablet at the restaurant makes sense now, and I don’t judge parents anymore
We have a nephew who didn't need a leash, but he had the cutest backpack what was a monkey and the tail was a leash that he loved wearing. He just turned 19.
His younger brother did not like the monkey, and he needed a leash. He was a runner. Still is, his mile is right around 6 minutes.
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There is a reason for declining child birth numbers... it has everything to do with more people knowing what they are really getting into.
Yeah we had to raise our siblings. Ain't raising another generation without being paid for it. It's why we work in education.
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Low birth rates deplete the work force in the long term. Creates issues where tax revenue is low and cost of social programs and healthcare are extremely high because there are so many people at retirement age and beyond. Birth rates at a minimum should be stagnant.
That assumes no immigration
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So this one time I was like three and being too quiet. I don't remember this. Apparently I had climbed up the upright grand piano and gotten scared of heights. I pressed myself against the wall and was whispering "^help^" over and over. Not too loud, because I was worried I'd get in trouble for climbing on the piano, but I needed help.
I was a high energy child. I learned to stop my bicycle at first by jumping off it onto grass hopefully and letting the bike crash. It must have been a nightmare for my parents to watch. So any extended silence was suspicious.
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My first kid was a perfect baby, she’d sleep 10 hours straight, she was quiet and never bratty, we would take her to restaurants with all our adult friends and she was always well behaved and didn’t need a tablet and would interact with everyone. We used to silently judge leash kid’s parents with the wife.
Then we had our second, an autistic boy with the energy of a thousand suns. Now I know, the leash isnt for me, it’s for all of you! The tablet at the restaurant makes sense now, and I don’t judge parents anymore
My first kid was a perfect baby, she’d sleep 10 hours straight, she was quiet and never bratty...Then we had our second, an autistic boy with the energy of a thousand suns.
My experience has been similar, except they absolutely rile eachother up, and when separated they're both incredible quiet and chill. One of their grandparents refuses to take my youngest overnight but begs for sleepovers regularly with my oldest. We try to make it special for my youngest by doing stuff we don't normally do on those nights (and we try to arrange outings with just the youngest too to make it as fair as we can), but it is really shocking just how quiet and reserved both are without the other to encourage them to cause chaos
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My first kid was a perfect baby, she’d sleep 10 hours straight, she was quiet and never bratty, we would take her to restaurants with all our adult friends and she was always well behaved and didn’t need a tablet and would interact with everyone. We used to silently judge leash kid’s parents with the wife.
Then we had our second, an autistic boy with the energy of a thousand suns. Now I know, the leash isnt for me, it’s for all of you! The tablet at the restaurant makes sense now, and I don’t judge parents anymore
When me and my brother were coming up there were no tablets. The only thing to distract kids back then was McDonald's colouring books.
Imagine my parents relief when the game boy was invented.
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I can't even differentiate the screams of play time from those of being brutally murdered that the kids I hear playing around my apartment complex make...
How many brutal murders of kids have you been ignoring?
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In the past people didn't have access to a device with endless information about how rough it is the raise kids. Instead they had other local parents as a source, and those parents just wanted company in thier misery.
When I was a kid we used to just get thrown outside along with all the other kids and told not to come back until lunch time.
We used to get up to all sorts no one cared. At one point someone's dad took us all to the beach which was about an hour away, we all just got in this strangers car (never met him before) and went to the beach. I don't remember my parents been even remotely bothered by that when they found out.
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That is a pretty funny remark.
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How many brutal murders of kids have you been ignoring?
As many as I can. Thankfully, I don't live near a school (I'm American).
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My first kid was a perfect baby, she’d sleep 10 hours straight, she was quiet and never bratty...Then we had our second, an autistic boy with the energy of a thousand suns.
My experience has been similar, except they absolutely rile eachother up, and when separated they're both incredible quiet and chill. One of their grandparents refuses to take my youngest overnight but begs for sleepovers regularly with my oldest. We try to make it special for my youngest by doing stuff we don't normally do on those nights (and we try to arrange outings with just the youngest too to make it as fair as we can), but it is really shocking just how quiet and reserved both are without the other to encourage them to cause chaos
Luckily my first has 11 years on her brother and helps out a lot with him
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The problem with parenting advice is every kid is different. This becomes clear after raised a gaggle of them. Anyone with one child that is giving advice is clueless.
My suggestion is not to give that type of child options. Tell them what's happening. Then do it. May that not work any better and ignores why you may have started giving them choices.
You didn't specify an age but typically choices are best for later development. Toddlers are terrorists and one should never negotiate with a terrorist.
I know this sounds very "duh" but I had an epiphany when I realized that the reason I hated advice and tips for parenting was that I didn't see my kid as a child, I saw her as a person. And just like I would be offended if my partner took some rando's advice on "women" to deal with me, I get subconsciously defensive when my daughter is treated like a kid that comes with a handbook. There are 5 ticks for this behavior in this age and one of them will work. Fuck that. It doesn't and it doesn't need to and it shouldn't be expected to. She's an individual, there is no manual for that.
She's turning 4 soon btw - and I love her to bits with her chaotic insanity. I feel as if it's not like she doesn't fit into a box or likes to think outside the box - she just dismantles the box, it is non-existent to her. She is actually very social, popular and follows rules well in kindergarten. Despite her answer to that theory of mind question about where the doll is being "there's multiple dolls" which spins into a Lynchian tale about parallel dolls
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200 IQ child thief
