Televangelist Jimmy Swaggart, whose ministry was toppled by prostitution scandals, dies at 90
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C'mon epic battle... Epic battle please... DAMNIT! Sex workers AGAIN!
Swaggart "Can I roll to convince the sex workers to leave me alone?"
GM "Sure."
Swaggart rolls a nat 20
Swaggart "Oh no, it looks like I rolled a nat 1. Looks like I have to sleep with the sex workers, again."
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The scumbag lived far longer than he should have.
Thats what burns my ass. Why do these pieces of shit never die young?!
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Thats what burns my ass. Why do these pieces of shit never die young?!
Hate and scorn sustains them.
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90 years of doing Satan's work, he can go back home where he belongs now.
Don't blame this on Satan.
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Contributors built Jimmy Swaggart Ministries into a business that made an estimated $142 million in 1986...
... Swaggart said publicly that his earnings were hurt in 1987 by the sex scandal.
Mawww.
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He gave his name to the sin of swaggarcy, of diverting church funds to pay for sex.
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Jimmy converted to Islam at the last second. He wanted to be surrounded by 72 virgin prostitutes.
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Took far too long. He got ~70 years more than he should have.
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Prostitution shouldn’t be a scandal. But also, all televangelists deserve to die.
It’s the hypocrisy. SW should be legal/decriminalized, but this motherfucker would have preached against fornication while getting a BJ under the pulpit if he thought he’d get away with it.
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Jimmy: “boy heaven sure is hot!” “And why am I in a hot tub of lava next to hitler and Regan?”
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OK now do Joel Osteen next.
And Kenneth Copeland. With fire.
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And Kenneth Copeland. With fire.
fuck dude that guy's held together with staples and wd-40
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What else did everyone else have for dinner today?
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And Kenneth Copeland. With fire.
I've never seen a person who looked more like a demon in a skin suit than Kenneth Copeland.
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fuck dude that guy's held together with staples and wd-40
Even before I saw that guy preach, I thought he was the creepiest-looking person ever. His sermons and lifestyle don't help.
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I've never seen a person who looked more like a demon in a skin suit than Kenneth Copeland.
fucker looks like the Edgar suit from Men in Black.
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I've never seen a person who looked more like a demon in a skin suit than Kenneth Copeland.
If I was religious I would definitely think he was the devil quoting scripture.
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Thats what burns my ass. Why do these pieces of shit never die young?!
There is no God
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Had to chew on this to figure it out.
Enemas inject things, so why would it make someone smaller?
Enemas are used to clear stools. Constipation relief.
Ahh. I get it now.
