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That would be good

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Microblog Memes
microblogmemes
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  • M [email protected]

    Reminder: put the avocado half DOWN on the table before whacking the pit with the knife. What's the matter, no cutting board? Afraid you'll accidentally whack the knife into the table? Let that sink in....

    E This user is from outside of this forum
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    wrote last edited by
    #20

    But my hand heals. The table doesn't.

    S 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • etherwhack@lemmy.worldE [email protected]

      Less than tide pods?

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      wrote last edited by
      #21

      They need to start putting the tide pods in the surprise eggs.

      0 1 Reply Last reply
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      • Z [email protected]

        Not that I feel a need to defend the USA, but afaik the ban is a general ban on putting non-edible items in food, and not a ban on surprise eggs specifically.

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        wrote last edited by
        #22

        Should avocado's be banned then?

        Z 1 Reply Last reply
        4
        • B [email protected]

          Anyone wanna guess number of accidental deaths avoided by that ban?

          Or additional deaths if it had unforeseen consequences!

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          wrote last edited by [email protected]
          #23

          We don't have to guess! There's apparently been 10 reported deaths worldwide since they were introduced 51 years ago.

          For context, 12 children die each day from gun violence in the US alone.

          B A 2 Replies Last reply
          3
          • I [email protected]

            Wouldn’t that bruise/smash the back of it? Put on an oven mitt of your aim is that bad.

            M This user is from outside of this forum
            M This user is from outside of this forum
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            wrote last edited by [email protected]
            #24

            It doesn't harm it at all. The knife sinking into the pit absorbs the shock, and besides you're about to eat it. Most injuries aren't caused by terrible aim, they're because the pit is slippery and curved, so just a little wrong angle can send the blade sliding off and into the hand. Especially when people whack too hard, and/or started the tequila or cannabis before the guac. That's why you make putting it down a habit, so your muscle memory will override your stupidity.

            If you're not going to eat the whole avocado, put it in the fridge with the pit still in it (and the open part covered) to keep it green.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • M [email protected]

              Reminder: put the avocado half DOWN on the table before whacking the pit with the knife. What's the matter, no cutting board? Afraid you'll accidentally whack the knife into the table? Let that sink in....

              plaidbaron@lemmy.worldP This user is from outside of this forum
              plaidbaron@lemmy.worldP This user is from outside of this forum
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              wrote last edited by
              #25

              Ive damn near chopped my finger off before trying to get the pit out. Listen to this person.

              1 Reply Last reply
              1
              • C [email protected]

                At least it's satisfying how perfectly they fit in there. Almost like they were made for each other.

                nailbar@sopuli.xyzN This user is from outside of this forum
                nailbar@sopuli.xyzN This user is from outside of this forum
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                wrote last edited by
                #26

                Fit in where? Where did you put the ball??

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • I [email protected]

                  I’d honestly be surprised if there were more kinder egg injuries than avocado pit related injuries, given how frequently people stab themselves in the hand trying to remove them. I get that those are mostly adults instead of kids and less likely to be deadly.

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                  wrote last edited by
                  #27

                  You can just break the chocolate egg with a table or your hand, you do not have to cut the toy out!

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • M [email protected]

                    Reminder: put the avocado half DOWN on the table before whacking the pit with the knife. What's the matter, no cutting board? Afraid you'll accidentally whack the knife into the table? Let that sink in....

                    K This user is from outside of this forum
                    K This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote last edited by
                    #28

                    I've heard of this before, and I don't understand... How far back do people bring their knife to whack the pit?

                    I bring my knife a couple of centimeters up. I don't think I bring it down hard enough to do any serious harm to my hand... But the way people talk about this, it seems everyone is doing an anime stance of pulling a sword from their sheath, going as far back as they can, and scream while trying to cut the pit in half with their oversized sword. Obviously missing and cutting off their hand in the process.

                    M T S 3 Replies Last reply
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                    • K [email protected]

                      I've heard of this before, and I don't understand... How far back do people bring their knife to whack the pit?

                      I bring my knife a couple of centimeters up. I don't think I bring it down hard enough to do any serious harm to my hand... But the way people talk about this, it seems everyone is doing an anime stance of pulling a sword from their sheath, going as far back as they can, and scream while trying to cut the pit in half with their oversized sword. Obviously missing and cutting off their hand in the process.

                      M This user is from outside of this forum
                      M This user is from outside of this forum
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                      wrote last edited by
                      #29

                      Just consider the relative hardness of your flesh versus the pit. And the fact that while you intend to hit the pit straight on, imbedding the knife, if it slips sideways, by the time it hits your skin it's going to be moving in a slicing motion, which obviously makes penetration of skin and tendons easier. What's so difficult about laying it on the cutting board? You're still allowed to hold the end of it for stability, just don't put your palm behind it.

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                      • E [email protected]

                        Should avocado's be banned then?

                        Z This user is from outside of this forum
                        Z This user is from outside of this forum
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                        wrote last edited by
                        #30

                        Only if they put non edible items in them.

                        little8lost@lemmy.worldL 1 Reply Last reply
                        1
                        • S [email protected]

                          I wonder if anyone makes sculptures or toys outta them avocado pits

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                          wrote last edited by
                          #31

                          It's possible. You need to let the pit dry out a little before you start carving. Depending on what you're doing a couple of days to a week. If you look up "avocado pit pendant" you can see some surprisingly intricate carvings. From what I've seen though people usually start off by making buttons. Like the kind you'd find on clothing. Once the carving is done you let it dry some more and then seal it like any other wood. Be warned though during either of the drying stages cracks can form or full on splits completely ruining the project.

                          1 Reply Last reply
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                          • K [email protected]

                            I've heard of this before, and I don't understand... How far back do people bring their knife to whack the pit?

                            I bring my knife a couple of centimeters up. I don't think I bring it down hard enough to do any serious harm to my hand... But the way people talk about this, it seems everyone is doing an anime stance of pulling a sword from their sheath, going as far back as they can, and scream while trying to cut the pit in half with their oversized sword. Obviously missing and cutting off their hand in the process.

                            T This user is from outside of this forum
                            T This user is from outside of this forum
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                            wrote last edited by
                            #32

                            Sounds like you're describing surgical failure in Rimworld "alright just removing the infect finger..
                            And...ah shit I accidentally stabbed him in the face 25 times and killed him"

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • Z [email protected]

                              Only if they put non edible items in them.

                              little8lost@lemmy.worldL This user is from outside of this forum
                              little8lost@lemmy.worldL This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote last edited by
                              #33

                              I never considered the oversized wooden marbles as edible

                              K 1 Reply Last reply
                              4
                              • S [email protected]

                                I wonder if anyone makes sculptures or toys outta them avocado pits

                                logicaldrivel@sopuli.xyzL This user is from outside of this forum
                                logicaldrivel@sopuli.xyzL This user is from outside of this forum
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                                wrote last edited by
                                #34

                                There are a people who carve the pits. There are a bunch of pendants and jewelry and stuff available on Etsy.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • J [email protected]

                                  They need to start putting the tide pods in the surprise eggs.

                                  0 This user is from outside of this forum
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                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #35

                                  Tide surprise!™

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  1
                                  • L [email protected]
                                    This post did not contain any content.
                                    asidonhopo@lemmy.worldA This user is from outside of this forum
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                                    wrote last edited by [email protected]
                                    #36

                                    Back in the 90s when the computer mouse was malfunctioning we would use the avocado's wooden ball when we were out of hard boiled egg yolks

                                    S P 2 Replies Last reply
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                                    • asidonhopo@lemmy.worldA [email protected]

                                      Back in the 90s when the computer mouse was malfunctioning we would use the avocado's wooden ball when we were out of hard boiled egg yolks

                                      S This user is from outside of this forum
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                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #37

                                      This is a much more humane option than the standard mouse balls.

                                      A 1 Reply Last reply
                                      12
                                      • S [email protected]

                                        This is a much more humane option than the standard mouse balls.

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                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #38

                                        Vegan computer mouse balls are better for the environment too

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        3
                                        • K [email protected]

                                          I've heard of this before, and I don't understand... How far back do people bring their knife to whack the pit?

                                          I bring my knife a couple of centimeters up. I don't think I bring it down hard enough to do any serious harm to my hand... But the way people talk about this, it seems everyone is doing an anime stance of pulling a sword from their sheath, going as far back as they can, and scream while trying to cut the pit in half with their oversized sword. Obviously missing and cutting off their hand in the process.

                                          S This user is from outside of this forum
                                          S This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #39

                                          The problem as I understand it is that people try to dig/slide the pit out of the avocado with the knife and their hand slips. The safer way is what you described - choose a knife with a bit of weight, draw it back a few cms and give it a nice whack, then with the knife firmly embedded, twist to release the pit.

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