Internet filters
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I mean, crabs are dangerously enough already with those strong claws, do we really want them learning how to read too? Think about itβ¦.
[taps forehead meme]
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I mean, crabs are dangerously enough already with those strong claws, do we really want them learning how to read too? Think about itβ¦.
[taps forehead meme]
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"Wait, what? Why?"
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Carcinization!
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There's a list of things to not mess around with. Crabs are a bit lower than squirrels, but not by much.
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"Wait, what? Why?"
Everyone needs a hobby.
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Russian spyware.
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If crabs could read there would be no stopping them.
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Wait, you are capable of taking care of what your child accesses online without the government censoring the internet for everyone??? That's impossible!
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I like to pride myself on being knowledgeable enough to clarify and expand on carcinology topics on Lemmy, but I don't know enough about crab neuroscience to know how effective this would be. I'm sorry, Lemmy.
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Russian spyware.
I mean you are not wrong but also they do do legitimate work when daddy kremlins not making them do butt stuff to unwitting cx.
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I believe 'crabs' used to mean an std at some point, but I don't remember which one. And as we all know, sexual knowledge of all kind is scary stuff, so... Oooooh, protect the kids!
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I believe 'crabs' used to mean an std at some point, but I don't remember which one. And as we all know, sexual knowledge of all kind is scary stuff, so... Oooooh, protect the kids!
Uh, crabs means crabs bruh
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FORBIDDEN KNOWLEDGE
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I believe 'crabs' used to mean an std at some point, but I don't remember which one. And as we all know, sexual knowledge of all kind is scary stuff, so... Oooooh, protect the kids!
Specifically, crab lice.
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Uh, crabs means crabs bruh
Pubic lice.
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I believe 'crabs' used to mean an std at some point, but I don't remember which one. And as we all know, sexual knowledge of all kind is scary stuff, so... Oooooh, protect the kids!
OMFG I'm old. Yeah, pubic lice are tiny insects (lice) that live on your junk. VERY itchy, otherwise harmless.
Got 'em once and then they came back a couple of months later. Slept in my dad's guest room after his best friend. Didn't even get laid!
Anyway, once internet porn became a thing everyone started shaving their pubes. That was mostly the end of 'em. Saw a crazy story out of Britain where people were volunteering to host them, keep the species alive for study.
If you catch these rare creatures, like a Pokemon from hell, you need nothing special to kill 'em off. I read the ingredients on a bottle of lice shampoo, nothing more than bug spray (pyrethrins) mixed with shampoo. Shave your junk, mix household bug spray into shampoo, wash every bit of your clothes and bedclothes in hot, soapy water, done. Use pyrethrins! I cannot vouch for any other shit you find in your cabinets!
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FORBIDDEN KNOWLEDGE
The dark magics are not to be revealed to one so young.
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Pubic lice.
Public Ice was my rap name in the 90s.
