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  3. What do you do when homeless folks ask for money?

What do you do when homeless folks ask for money?

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  • T [email protected]

    Part of the reason for those who won't accept anything but cash is purely because they're not actually homeless but instead learned that they can make more begging than they can working a crap fast food job for example. I've even heard of groups of people coordinating their efforts so they can make sure they aren't oversaturating a given part of town or in a some cases pooling the takings at the end of the day to help even out the inevitable variability

    R This user is from outside of this forum
    R This user is from outside of this forum
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    wrote last edited by
    #156

    Certainly there are people that do that or want to use the money for drugs, which is why I always volunteer to buy it for them vs give them money. And I don't carry cash anyway.

    If they're genuinely hustling for cash they're unlikely to walk away with you to get food, a bus ticket, whatever because they're wasting time. I've had a few take me up on the offer and then still try to talk me out of cash while walking, but most hustlers just walk away immediately when you call their bluff and offer to buy it for them.

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    • B [email protected]

      This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

      I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

      I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

      Its tough.

      C This user is from outside of this forum
      C This user is from outside of this forum
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      wrote last edited by
      #157

      Depending on how they ask, it's either a short polite "no" or I just ignore them (it's mostly the former, thankfully). I rarely, if ever, have cash on me. And although it sometimes happen, I'm not exactly safe from a single bad month putting me under anyway.

      Something I won't do is insult/harass/otherwise make them even more miserable. If I can't help them, I'm sure as hell won't make things worse for them.

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      • S [email protected]

        I almost never have cash or even change now, so that's what I tell them. I used to give them some money if I had it and wasn't immediately going to use it. One of my old friends used to give them a beer out of a pack he bought if there was a person outside the store or on the corner begging on the drive to wherever he was going.

        E This user is from outside of this forum
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        wrote last edited by
        #158

        Homeless people over here accept Venmo or similar

        B 1 Reply Last reply
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        • E [email protected]

          Homeless people over here accept Venmo or similar

          B This user is from outside of this forum
          B This user is from outside of this forum
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          wrote last edited by
          #159

          If you have the time, give them food? Idk

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          • muziriyaolili@lemmy.worldM [email protected]

            I once experienced , in my 22. I gave out about 10 dol , then got keeping asked (i was too shy to reject!) so at last i gave out 50 dol, all what i took from school my college.
            bad grammar sry

            W This user is from outside of this forum
            W This user is from outside of this forum
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            wrote last edited by
            #160

            But I can understand what you were saying 🙂

            Do you want me to rewrite it for you how I would say it?

            muziriyaolili@lemmy.worldM 1 Reply Last reply
            1
            • B [email protected]

              This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

              I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

              I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

              Its tough.

              C This user is from outside of this forum
              C This user is from outside of this forum
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              wrote last edited by
              #161

              I give what I can when I can. It's rare to have actual cash, but if it's close to a restaurant I just ask if they want food or drink and buy them something with my card. Takes 5 minutes and is just a small act of kindness and support from another person. Most people don't even acknowledge they exist, let alone talk to them.

              Life under capitalism seriously sucks for all of us (except a few hundred people), if I can maybe help make someone's day a little less shitty I'll try.

              I don't mean this in a judgemental way at all, but just remember that they are humans too, just like you or I. Most people do not realize just how insanely lucky they are to be able to do basic things like work and have a house and car and have money and all that many people don't get the same opportunities and are dealt a bad hand in life through no fault of theirs. One big medical bill can make someone homeless in this system. Don't feel bad or awkward about having some resources that others don't have, but you can also slow down and share a little.

              Treat other people how you would want to be treated if roles reversed. Simple as that.

              Again, I don't mean to make anyone feel bad for not giving. I also don't mean to elevate myself in the least, I'm not any better than you, I'm just trying to help people see the humanity in others regardless of money.

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              • B [email protected]

                This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

                I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

                I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

                Its tough.

                heywhatsay@slrpnk.netH This user is from outside of this forum
                heywhatsay@slrpnk.netH This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote last edited by
                #162

                Peacefully coexisting is the hope imo. Just leave people alone, offer help if you can, otherwise wish them well.

                Anyone harassing either has drug or mental issues, not much you can do but limit interactions.

                Sound like asylums may be returning, so that will probably be horrible.

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                1
                • B [email protected]

                  This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

                  I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

                  I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

                  Its tough.

                  cracks_inthewalls@sh.itjust.worksC This user is from outside of this forum
                  cracks_inthewalls@sh.itjust.worksC This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote last edited by
                  #163

                  If you don't have the means to help with what they're asking for, a quick "Sorry, can't help today" and going about your business is they way to go. It's not a full on engagement, but it is an acknowledgement.

                  Back when I was a smoker, if I didn't have means to help with cash but had some smokes to spare and a little time I'd say "No, but if you smoke I can share one with you" and, if they were into it, stop and chat for a cigarette break's length of time. Lots of factors to consider here before doing that, but for the most part people enjoyed the acknowledgement for a few minutes. YMMV.

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                  • W [email protected]

                    But I can understand what you were saying 🙂

                    Do you want me to rewrite it for you how I would say it?

                    muziriyaolili@lemmy.worldM This user is from outside of this forum
                    muziriyaolili@lemmy.worldM This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote last edited by
                    #164

                    Ye. Not native i am:]

                    W 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • muziriyaolili@lemmy.worldM [email protected]

                      I once experienced , in my 22. I gave out about 10 dol , then got keeping asked (i was too shy to reject!) so at last i gave out 50 dol, all what i took from school my college.
                      bad grammar sry

                      samus12345@sh.itjust.worksS This user is from outside of this forum
                      samus12345@sh.itjust.worksS This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote last edited by
                      #165

                      Here's how Google translates what you said into Simplified Chinese:

                      我曾经经历过,在我 22 岁的时候。我捐了大约 10 美元,然后一直被问到(我太害羞了,不敢拒绝!)所以最后我捐了 50 美元,全部是我在学校和大学学到的。语法不好,抱歉

                      muziriyaolili@lemmy.worldM 1 Reply Last reply
                      1
                      • samus12345@sh.itjust.worksS [email protected]

                        Here's how Google translates what you said into Simplified Chinese:

                        我曾经经历过,在我 22 岁的时候。我捐了大约 10 美元,然后一直被问到(我太害羞了,不敢拒绝!)所以最后我捐了 50 美元,全部是我在学校和大学学到的。语法不好,抱歉

                        muziriyaolili@lemmy.worldM This user is from outside of this forum
                        muziriyaolili@lemmy.worldM This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote last edited by
                        #166

                        是。这是在学校时期经历的。

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                        • B [email protected]

                          This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

                          I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

                          I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

                          Its tough.

                          B This user is from outside of this forum
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                          wrote last edited by
                          #167

                          Ignore them.

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                          • B [email protected]

                            This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

                            I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

                            I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

                            Its tough.

                            P This user is from outside of this forum
                            P This user is from outside of this forum
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                            wrote last edited by
                            #168

                            I try to have food bars and give it to them. Hopefully they eat it and not trade it for drugs or something

                            D 1 Reply Last reply
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                            • O [email protected]

                              In the northeastern U.S. I've mostly learned to acknowledge them, don't give anything, and move on with my life.

                              Not sure if it's bad luck or what, but nearly every time I've tried to be nice and offer them something it always backfires. I'll be passing by with some food and they'll ask me for some, I give them some and then they tell me it wasn't enough and to give them all the food I was carrying. Like WTF?

                              Another time I actually had some change on me so I gave him some and he said it wasn't enough money and started following me, wanted me to go to an ATM so I can take out more money for him. I was forced to tell him to stop following me or I'd have to call the cops.

                              I have even more stories like that.. going through those motions repeatedly it feels like the homeless have taught me not to give to the homeless. But hopefully your experiences have better outcomes.

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                              wrote last edited by
                              #169

                              I'm in the northeast, I nod, apologize for having no cash and ignore them past that. I donate to the local food pantry, I know they're gonna buy drugs or alcohol with any money I give them face to face. I dated a girl that was homeless in NYC for a year, she spent every dollar she got on heroin. She knew where to get free food and clothes. She made about 50 to 100 dollars a day panhandling.

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                              • B [email protected]

                                This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

                                I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

                                I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

                                Its tough.

                                S This user is from outside of this forum
                                S This user is from outside of this forum
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                                wrote last edited by
                                #170

                                Its not like you can say “oh no, I donate to services that help the needy” because that person isn’t necessarily being helped by that.

                                I had a friend say exactly that to someone. When I asked them further about it, they said, "he knows where to find a cot." That was more convincing to me before I listened to the "According to Need," Podcast. It looked at homelessness in the Bay Area (where we live) and getting a bed is nearly impossible.

                                I don't usually give money cause I rarely carry small bills. But sometimes. And I will without fail buy food for anyone who asks.

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                                • B [email protected]

                                  This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

                                  I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

                                  I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

                                  Its tough.

                                  V This user is from outside of this forum
                                  V This user is from outside of this forum
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                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #171

                                  i give them money, just $10. I feel bad and I'll be thinking about it all day. Even if they do something wrong with it at least they know someone cared

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                                  • B [email protected]

                                    This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

                                    I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

                                    I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

                                    Its tough.

                                    I This user is from outside of this forum
                                    I This user is from outside of this forum
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                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #172

                                    I tell them the truth: I don't carry cash.

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                                    1
                                    • B [email protected]

                                      This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

                                      I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

                                      I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

                                      Its tough.

                                      D This user is from outside of this forum
                                      D This user is from outside of this forum
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                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #173

                                      Sometimes I give, sometimes I don't, kinda depends if I have cash.

                                      As a reasonably sized man, I also try to make eye contact and give a polite "Sorry I don't have anything today." For those who really need the help and are trying like hell to get it, I can't imagine the insult to injury you must feel to not only not get help but also to be treated as though you are invisible. I like to at least let people who ask know that I can see them.

                                      If you're in a legitimately dangerous place or you feel you may be at risk in some way maybe don't do this though.

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                                      • B [email protected]

                                        This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.

                                        I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.

                                        I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.

                                        Its tough.

                                        5 This user is from outside of this forum
                                        5 This user is from outside of this forum
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                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #174

                                        I lived in a rough neighborhood for a good while. It hardens you to it a bit. I just say I don’t have anything for them.

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                                        • P [email protected]

                                          I try to have food bars and give it to them. Hopefully they eat it and not trade it for drugs or something

                                          D This user is from outside of this forum
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                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #175

                                          hi i'll take 2 drugs please, please accept this kinder surprise egg as payment

                                          P 1 Reply Last reply
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