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  3. We really don't want to talk about our problems

We really don't want to talk about our problems

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Lemmy Shitpost
lemmyshitpost
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  • A [email protected]

    Theraphy, when it works, only solves internal causes of one's pain.

    29 days away from present day society, will for a while suspend the external causes of one's pain.

    (Which is why the former usually doesn't fully solve everything: the external shit, which often is what indirectly created much of the internal shit via things like trauma and coping mechanisms, is still there and pushing you)

    W This user is from outside of this forum
    W This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by
    #115

    I'm considering hard getting "lost" forever.

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    • O [email protected]

      How bad can it be? /s

      W This user is from outside of this forum
      W This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote on last edited by
      #116

      I don't know what I'm holding out for. Maybe I should fix my teeth, take the gadgets I already have, and get lost forever.

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      • O [email protected]

        This is, of course, the fault of women.

        N This user is from outside of this forum
        N This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #117

        No? It's the fault of all genders. Men perpetuate ideas that hurt other men, and women perpetuate ideas that hurt other women. Vice versa is equally true.

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        • bilb@lemmy.mlB [email protected]

          That's about 1 standard stint in rehab where I'm from

          L This user is from outside of this forum
          L This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by [email protected]
          #118

          It is sad when you start considering going to rehab just to get 28-30 days away from work to de-stress, get sleep, meditate, do some inner work and work on healthy habits. Because if you are single and not reproducing, you don't get maternity leave and if you are young or middle aged and relatively healthy, you aren't getting any orthopedic surgeries that render you temporarily disabled... and if you already lost your parents, there is no family leave... I mean, I can adopt or pretend to adopt I have some kind of addictive habit but would prefer not to-- Can't I just take a mental health leave of absence and then return to my job? One week here or there every 6 months (if I am lucky) is just not going to do it.

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          • N [email protected]

            No? It's the fault of all genders. Men perpetuate ideas that hurt other men, and women perpetuate ideas that hurt other women. Vice versa is equally true.

            O This user is from outside of this forum
            O This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote on last edited by
            #119

            Im sure. So hard to hear men have it so uniquely rough.

            N 1 Reply Last reply
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            • A [email protected]

              Therepy - costs money, needs an appointment, takes time to work out issues.

              Lost at sea - free, no appointment necessary, immediate relief from the burden of living under capitalism

              L This user is from outside of this forum
              L This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote on last edited by
              #120

              But the ocean wants to kill you... (can't blame oceans for wanting to kill humans but it is not your fault..). Therapy can be obtained in many different ways. I think maybe going to a therapist is for people who need motivation to care for themselves, need help starting to be healthy, compassionate and forgiving to themselves and get some coaching to find good ways to get there. We sometimes are in a place too low to help ourselves and need some help, a hand... guidance, encouragement and reinforcement that we are worth the trouble and energy.

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              • B [email protected]

                Just get a project car. It costs money too, but you have a getaway from life, just go to your garage. And the end result is a cool car.

                I ask myself spicier questions than the therapist ever will anyway. I haven't gotten a project car though, that's too much therapy. My mind already wanders far enough in any situation.

                L This user is from outside of this forum
                L This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #121

                OMG that made me think of that episode in King of the Hill where Luann had to retreat into taking care of the pool when she was in an untenable roommate situation...

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                • S [email protected]

                  men built society. whatever problems are inherent in it were practically designed by men. as a matter of fact, the further we go, the more we slip away from the feminine qualities of our humanity (our more egalitarian hunter-gatherer roots). and as it begins to collapse around us, you incels are gonna cry about how it's unfair? fuck you. put your big boy pants on and deal with it. or better yet, retreat completely from it and let the people with honest consciences rebuild it.

                  god, i fucking hate incels.

                  N This user is from outside of this forum
                  N This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #122

                  This is a rather bizarre response to come up with. First I am not an incel, that's a right wing ideology I don't subscribe to. I mean some of the concepts they use don't even make sense statistically - like they are logically impossible. I digress.

                  Women make up more than half the population. Sexism wouldn't have been as big of a problem and still wouldn't be as big of a problem if women didn't perpetuate it too. Just look at the trad wife movement or modern women who despise feminism, or like any women's beauty standards, or the whole thing about matching outfits, etc. All of these are forms of sexism that men just don't engage in to nearly the extent women do. Purity tests for butch lesbians and trans girls is another one. At least you can argue that men also do that, but they aren't the ones kicking women out of bathrooms.

                  Absolutely toxic masculinity is a problem largeley caused by men, but that's not the fault of the individual. Like I didn't decide that boys don't cry. Plenty of women too help perpetuate and reinforce these ideas by doing things like breaking up with men who show any vulnerability. There is a reason why gay men are better at this.

                  As for the whole thing of slipping further away from feminine qualities - you do know not all past societies were more feminine, right? Have you heard of ancient Greece? You do realize feminism has made large strides at addressing much of these issues? Like this all used to be much worse, things have been progressively changing for the better and still are in most places. It's only the USA that seems to have taken a nosedive recently. Even that is a push back against broader change.

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                  • O [email protected]

                    Im sure. So hard to hear men have it so uniquely rough.

                    N This user is from outside of this forum
                    N This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #123

                    No one is saying women don't have it rough. The difference is one gender is being pushed out of society, the other is being pushed under it. Men are basically encouraged to give up and go away, maybe commit suicide or go fight in a war. Women are encouraged to find a "man" and become some tradwife who has no agency. Neither is a good thing, but don't pretend they aren't different.

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                    • S [email protected]

                      therapy also teaches a lot of sociopathic traits.

                      my SIL went through therapy recently (after getting into a weird polygamous relationship which allowed her the $$ to do so). she and my wife had lived through a pretty traumatic upbringing after their wonderful father died and left them to deal with a BPD mother who blew through the family money and left them to practically fend for themselves while being batshit crazy.

                      all the therapist taught her was to be selfish. she practically cut off contact with both her sister and mother and just got really good at doing what was best for herself and herself only. since then, her mother has become disabled and now my wife is having to deal with it all alone while the sister lives a very lavish life on a farm.

                      fuck therapy and fuck modern life in general. no wonder we're all becoming assholes.

                      N This user is from outside of this forum
                      N This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #124

                      If the mother is so bad and abusive then why is your wife helping her? I think the sister did the right thing here. The state has mechanisms to take care of the elderly for good reasons.

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                      • N [email protected]

                        No one is saying women don't have it rough. The difference is one gender is being pushed out of society, the other is being pushed under it. Men are basically encouraged to give up and go away, maybe commit suicide or go fight in a war. Women are encouraged to find a "man" and become some tradwife who has no agency. Neither is a good thing, but don't pretend they aren't different.

                        O This user is from outside of this forum
                        O This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                        #125

                        Non heteronormative women are absolutely encouraged to die.

                        5150 holds (local code, idk how local) are like a rite of passage.

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                        • O [email protected]

                          Non heteronormative women are absolutely encouraged to die.

                          5150 holds (local code, idk how local) are like a rite of passage.

                          N This user is from outside of this forum
                          N This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #126

                          I hadn't considered that. I can't say I know much of the struggles of lesbians.

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                          • N [email protected]

                            I hadn't considered that. I can't say I know much of the struggles of lesbians.

                            O This user is from outside of this forum
                            O This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #127

                            Also, heteronormative women are only valued for how they can, potentially, make more men. The platonic ideal is kept pregnant and comatose so it doesn't talk.

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                            • B [email protected]

                              Agreed. It’s more like “people would rather be lost at sea than live in a modern society”.

                              P This user is from outside of this forum
                              P This user is from outside of this forum
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                              wrote on last edited by
                              #128

                              To be fair we were breed to be lost at sea/forest/steppe, not live in a modern society. Like that's our natural place to live and die, not a city.

                              lillypip@lemmy.caL 1 Reply Last reply
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                              • A [email protected]

                                1.8/10 on IMDB

                                P This user is from outside of this forum
                                P This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #129

                                So even with bots it's only 1.8...

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                                • B [email protected]

                                  You can just do that. No one is stopping you from buying a canoe and floating away

                                  V This user is from outside of this forum
                                  V This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #130

                                  A cursory glance implies a decent canoe starts at $2000, so my bank account is stopping me, at bare minimum

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                                  • S [email protected]

                                    The environment we created for ourselves takes advantage of our evolution and uses our biology against us.

                                    Food is drowned in sugar to get us addicted.
                                    Social media is designed to keep us angry and upset.
                                    Entertainment is a recycled polished turd, designed to take no risks and challenge nothing and leave us only with shallow amusement.

                                    We are losing our respect for the profound, our empathy for the other, and our curiosity for the unknown.

                                    We have made a world of numbing poison for ourselves. A 29 day separation sounds like the most powerful “therapy” we could have tbh.

                                    Z This user is from outside of this forum
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                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #131

                                    Damn, that is well said. This sentence in particular:

                                    We are losing our respect for the profound, our empathy for the other, and our curiosity for the unknown.

                                    is the kind of thing that sounds like an empty platitude when your mind/life is in a bad state, but after a few years of progress and healing I read that line and wish I could adequately express the years of reflection and learning that can be distilled down to such a short statement.

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                                    • aceshigh@lemmy.worldA [email protected]

                                      the unexamined life is not worth living

                                      D This user is from outside of this forum
                                      D This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #132

                                      That's snappy. You should put it on a coffee mug.

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                                      • track_shovel@slrpnk.netT [email protected]
                                        This post did not contain any content.
                                        noodlesreborn@lemmy.worldN This user is from outside of this forum
                                        noodlesreborn@lemmy.worldN This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #133

                                        I hate how I understand this.

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                                        • Z [email protected]

                                          Damn, that is well said. This sentence in particular:

                                          We are losing our respect for the profound, our empathy for the other, and our curiosity for the unknown.

                                          is the kind of thing that sounds like an empty platitude when your mind/life is in a bad state, but after a few years of progress and healing I read that line and wish I could adequately express the years of reflection and learning that can be distilled down to such a short statement.

                                          S This user is from outside of this forum
                                          S This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                                          #134

                                          Thanks stranger.

                                          I think a lot about daily life and the systems we’ve built and the way people treat each other and think about existence, and how we’ve changed and over time… or haven’t.

                                          We’re advancing so much faster than we’re evolving.

                                          I think that’s causing problems 😕

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