When do you finally calm down after buying a house?
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My wife and I are about 3 weeks from closing on our first house and I am losing my god damn mind. All of our finances/budget work out while still having savings for emergency repairs, our inspection went well after having to back out on the first we offered on (tree fell on the house after offer was accepted, thought we could fix but it was a wash) and we really like the area and first impressions of our neighbors.
I know buying a house is a top "most stressful thing" an average person can go through, but this is a lot harder than I thought and I didn't downplay it in my head. I am guessing I will feel like this for the first year or two and progressively it will become normal right? We have a lot of support from our families (financially, emotionally and labor/handypeople) so I am still optimistic about the whole thing, but my appetite is non existent and insomnia seems to be working in overdrive.
After closing it starts to reduce. Doesn't hit zero until one has fixed the major systems (by doing or paying) and inflation makes your old apartment Bella expensive. (Locked in rent is nice.)
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My wife and I are about 3 weeks from closing on our first house and I am losing my god damn mind. All of our finances/budget work out while still having savings for emergency repairs, our inspection went well after having to back out on the first we offered on (tree fell on the house after offer was accepted, thought we could fix but it was a wash) and we really like the area and first impressions of our neighbors.
I know buying a house is a top "most stressful thing" an average person can go through, but this is a lot harder than I thought and I didn't downplay it in my head. I am guessing I will feel like this for the first year or two and progressively it will become normal right? We have a lot of support from our families (financially, emotionally and labor/handypeople) so I am still optimistic about the whole thing, but my appetite is non existent and insomnia seems to be working in overdrive.
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What's that sound? Is it supposed to make it? Did it make it before? Is that wet? Why is it wet? That bug is new, haven't seen one like that. Electric bill is higher this month. Got the escrow statement; it went up again. That crack... Seems longer. Door squeaks again. Was the drain recessed like that? Are you sure? That's loose, should probably do something about it. Gotta run to the hardware store. They're backordered on that thing that melted in the fire. The AC is dripping again. Is the water pressure lower than usual? What's that smell? Is it coming from under there? Why is the milk spoiled? Is the fridge warm to you? Grass is long again. Sprinkler got run over by a neighbor. We need to do something about the dead tree.
Literally things said at my house IN THE LAST THREE WEEKS. Holy shit why.
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If it ever does calm down and stabilize, beware. That means something expensive is about to break. It's always something!
But really, it does get a lot less hectic after you close, get utilities and address records sorted, finish any big upfront renovations you want to do, and get most of your stuff unpacked.
Never relax... The universe can sense when you're content and will balance itself.
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My wife and I are about 3 weeks from closing on our first house and I am losing my god damn mind. All of our finances/budget work out while still having savings for emergency repairs, our inspection went well after having to back out on the first we offered on (tree fell on the house after offer was accepted, thought we could fix but it was a wash) and we really like the area and first impressions of our neighbors.
I know buying a house is a top "most stressful thing" an average person can go through, but this is a lot harder than I thought and I didn't downplay it in my head. I am guessing I will feel like this for the first year or two and progressively it will become normal right? We have a lot of support from our families (financially, emotionally and labor/handypeople) so I am still optimistic about the whole thing, but my appetite is non existent and insomnia seems to be working in overdrive.
About 2 year mark things start to fall in place at year 4 it will truly feel like home. It's
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My wife and I are about 3 weeks from closing on our first house and I am losing my god damn mind. All of our finances/budget work out while still having savings for emergency repairs, our inspection went well after having to back out on the first we offered on (tree fell on the house after offer was accepted, thought we could fix but it was a wash) and we really like the area and first impressions of our neighbors.
I know buying a house is a top "most stressful thing" an average person can go through, but this is a lot harder than I thought and I didn't downplay it in my head. I am guessing I will feel like this for the first year or two and progressively it will become normal right? We have a lot of support from our families (financially, emotionally and labor/handypeople) so I am still optimistic about the whole thing, but my appetite is non existent and insomnia seems to be working in overdrive.
I fixed most of the rainwater drainage issues 2 years ago and I STILL check the basement for leaks every time it rains. Homeownership is a constant battle against water and water is one sneaky bastard.
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I agree, we had the option to sue the seller but the reality is, even if we spend a ton of money to take him to court, there's no guaranteed payment at the end. We decided to focus on fixing the problem rather than try to get compensation from them.
There is absolutely no system in place to protect people from something like this. The inspector didn't find it, the realty attorneys didn't find it, the realtors didn't find it. We only found out about it when pulling a permit for a deck.
Yep. Just another example of how the system is designed to protect the existing capital and landowners over what is fair or just.
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If your first house is anything like mine was, it'll be a lot of "What's that sound!? God dammit..." followed by either a day's worth of work fixing something, or a bill for several hundred dollars. It took a few major problems before my wife and I started getting confident that we knew what we were doing. You get used to it, and eventually problems that arise are no longer a "will we get through this?" and instead become an "ugh, I can't wait until we're through this." After a few years I was able to sell it to someone else as their starter home, and use the equity I built to buy a much nicer house with far fewer problems, though you'll never be totally free from the occasional sudden panic of a major issue.
a bill for several hundred dollars
After a few years I was able to sell it to someone else as their starter home, and use the equity I built
What boomer bullshit is this. Its 2025 you have got to be dreaming.
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What's that sound? Is it supposed to make it? Did it make it before? Is that wet? Why is it wet? That bug is new, haven't seen one like that. Electric bill is higher this month. Got the escrow statement; it went up again. That crack... Seems longer. Door squeaks again. Was the drain recessed like that? Are you sure? That's loose, should probably do something about it. Gotta run to the hardware store. They're backordered on that thing that melted in the fire. The AC is dripping again. Is the water pressure lower than usual? What's that smell? Is it coming from under there? Why is the milk spoiled? Is the fridge warm to you? Grass is long again. Sprinkler got run over by a neighbor. We need to do something about the dead tree.
Literally things said at my house IN THE LAST THREE WEEKS. Holy shit why.
Sounds similar to my mental chatter about our house.
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Didn't think about seeing how everything holds up during all the seasons. Windows and AC are only a few years old but the furnace is closer to end of life than new. Guess we will see how it goes this winter. I'm sure there will be a lot more to consider that I don't even know about yet.
We got a new furnace and the super old one was basically just as good. Get a good carbon monoxide alarm for your bedroom and also one right by the machine.
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I fixed most of the rainwater drainage issues 2 years ago and I STILL check the basement for leaks every time it rains. Homeownership is a constant battle against water and water is one sneaky bastard.
My basement flooded out first year. One sump pump and Reno later I still worry about it but to be honest every time I hear that pump go is music to me ears knowing it's water diverted away from my house.
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My wife and I are about 3 weeks from closing on our first house and I am losing my god damn mind. All of our finances/budget work out while still having savings for emergency repairs, our inspection went well after having to back out on the first we offered on (tree fell on the house after offer was accepted, thought we could fix but it was a wash) and we really like the area and first impressions of our neighbors.
I know buying a house is a top "most stressful thing" an average person can go through, but this is a lot harder than I thought and I didn't downplay it in my head. I am guessing I will feel like this for the first year or two and progressively it will become normal right? We have a lot of support from our families (financially, emotionally and labor/handypeople) so I am still optimistic about the whole thing, but my appetite is non existent and insomnia seems to be working in overdrive.
It has been 5 years. Next door has been doing construction for the past 9 months, they have destabilized two of the property border trees that could potentially land on my house. They have literally lashed them to the frame of the house in the meantime at least. So I'm a little biased here haha
The stress is as bad as you make it usually though. Sometimes you just have to let things be suboptimal for a while to maintain your mental health.
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My wife and I are about 3 weeks from closing on our first house and I am losing my god damn mind. All of our finances/budget work out while still having savings for emergency repairs, our inspection went well after having to back out on the first we offered on (tree fell on the house after offer was accepted, thought we could fix but it was a wash) and we really like the area and first impressions of our neighbors.
I know buying a house is a top "most stressful thing" an average person can go through, but this is a lot harder than I thought and I didn't downplay it in my head. I am guessing I will feel like this for the first year or two and progressively it will become normal right? We have a lot of support from our families (financially, emotionally and labor/handypeople) so I am still optimistic about the whole thing, but my appetite is non existent and insomnia seems to be working in overdrive.
It goes away, I spent ~11 months doing a complete DIY remodel after my partner and I closed so that whole year was stressful, but now that we're moved in it really ain't that bad.
Chill, you'll feel better soon
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a bill for several hundred dollars
After a few years I was able to sell it to someone else as their starter home, and use the equity I built
What boomer bullshit is this. Its 2025 you have got to be dreaming.
wrote on last edited by [email protected]Huh? I bought my first house in 2020. It was $200,000 for a run-down house in a bad part of Minneapolis. It was my first home, so I could use the first-time home buyer benefit to only need $10,000 for the down payment, which I had built up over a few years of saving. While in the house, fixing my garage door when it broke was $250, and repairing my AC and Furnace each time they broke was $300-500. Stuff that was bigger than that was covered by insurance. I fixed everything else myself, however poorly. The money I got for selling the house in 2023 for $230,000 was enough to afford the down payment on the next place after paying back my first mortgage and the realtor fees.
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When you're tired from work but you've still got to clean the whole thing to 'protect your investment'.
Also because it's nice to live somewhere clean and tidy?
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What's that sound? Is it supposed to make it? Did it make it before? Is that wet? Why is it wet? That bug is new, haven't seen one like that. Electric bill is higher this month. Got the escrow statement; it went up again. That crack... Seems longer. Door squeaks again. Was the drain recessed like that? Are you sure? That's loose, should probably do something about it. Gotta run to the hardware store. They're backordered on that thing that melted in the fire. The AC is dripping again. Is the water pressure lower than usual? What's that smell? Is it coming from under there? Why is the milk spoiled? Is the fridge warm to you? Grass is long again. Sprinkler got run over by a neighbor. We need to do something about the dead tree.
Literally things said at my house IN THE LAST THREE WEEKS. Holy shit why.
Gotta love having an old house. It's simultaneously reassuring and deeply stressful when a professional looks at something that seems really bad and just says, "Well, I can tell from the layers of paint that's been there a long time. So if it hasn't become a problem in all that time, it's probably fine. But give me a call if your house starts falling apart."
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I fixed most of the rainwater drainage issues 2 years ago and I STILL check the basement for leaks every time it rains. Homeownership is a constant battle against water and water is one sneaky bastard.
Water is entropy manifest to constantly remind you that anything you do is temporary and laughably futile on geologic timescales.
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My wife and I are about 3 weeks from closing on our first house and I am losing my god damn mind. All of our finances/budget work out while still having savings for emergency repairs, our inspection went well after having to back out on the first we offered on (tree fell on the house after offer was accepted, thought we could fix but it was a wash) and we really like the area and first impressions of our neighbors.
I know buying a house is a top "most stressful thing" an average person can go through, but this is a lot harder than I thought and I didn't downplay it in my head. I am guessing I will feel like this for the first year or two and progressively it will become normal right? We have a lot of support from our families (financially, emotionally and labor/handypeople) so I am still optimistic about the whole thing, but my appetite is non existent and insomnia seems to be working in overdrive.
Everything you're feeling is normal. Stay optimistic. We were in your shoes not that long ago and went through the same thing. Keep breathing, deep breaths, maybe take up some breath focused meditation for 15-20 mins a day. Or even some yoga can calm your nervous system. There will be unexpected setbacks but you're going to work through it all and come out the other side just fine. Personally, I've had to redirect my attention to just tackling one thing at a time and keep plugging away so I don't get overwhelmed with the magnitude of all the issues together.
How does one eat an elephant? One bite at a time.
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My wife and I are about 3 weeks from closing on our first house and I am losing my god damn mind. All of our finances/budget work out while still having savings for emergency repairs, our inspection went well after having to back out on the first we offered on (tree fell on the house after offer was accepted, thought we could fix but it was a wash) and we really like the area and first impressions of our neighbors.
I know buying a house is a top "most stressful thing" an average person can go through, but this is a lot harder than I thought and I didn't downplay it in my head. I am guessing I will feel like this for the first year or two and progressively it will become normal right? We have a lot of support from our families (financially, emotionally and labor/handypeople) so I am still optimistic about the whole thing, but my appetite is non existent and insomnia seems to be working in overdrive.
Our house has a partial park view. It's nice. And, in about 3 years we'll have a full park view because the pipeline running through the city is undermining the foundation of every house in the neighborhood and we're all slowly sliding into the park.
But you're going to be fine...
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About 2 year mark things start to fall in place at year 4 it will truly feel like home. It's
It is what?
I'm dying here with anticipation.
