I had a neighbour who embalmed his own wife.
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I have a sub aracnoid cyst, It started growing and shoving my brain into my spine, I had brain surgery, and I'm on a combo of meds that would kill a normal person. I experience hallucinations that I can never turn off all the time. Sparks, trailers, things that aren't melting melting, usually numbers and letters, sometimes everything is technocolor, sometimes double vision, tunnel vision, White noise often sounds like angelic singing, I hear my name a lot when there's no sounds, anyways. I live a mostly, kind of sort of, normal life. Driving isn't really a problem, it's not my reaction times or decision making that's the issue, and the reality I see is doing weird shit, but I don't see things in the wrong place. But also, these aren't all happening all the time, abs if I get a few happening at once, I'll try and take it easy. Things have gotten better with the dissolution of my former relationship. A lot less random dramatic stress.
That sounds difficult, one of my favorite parts of every trip is when it's finally over. I'm glad to hear it's not stopping you from living.
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Go watch the end of wolf of wall street. The part where they think they are driving amazingly.
I'm built different
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Dude I totally understand. I normally suck at video games but I've played Counter-Strike competitively on 25i before and I swear it turned me into a pro.
All of a sudden I could pinpoint enemies with millimeter precision from the sound of their footsteps alone. It was like having x-ray vision or echolocation, no joke (Shout out to the CS devs for their excellent sound design). My aim was suddenly a lot better too. Headshots were child's play.
Wish I still had gameplay footage but unfortunately this was several PCs ago. It's been a long time since I've fucked with psychedelics cause they don't pair nicely with anxiety (only time I was able play video games on the stuff was when I was drunk too). I was never that good at video games ever again.
I remember one time playing Destiny 1 pvp peaking, I stopped being able to distinguish objects from environment but somehow I was still putting the crosshairs on people's heads
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I have a sub aracnoid cyst, It started growing and shoving my brain into my spine, I had brain surgery, and I'm on a combo of meds that would kill a normal person. I experience hallucinations that I can never turn off all the time. Sparks, trailers, things that aren't melting melting, usually numbers and letters, sometimes everything is technocolor, sometimes double vision, tunnel vision, White noise often sounds like angelic singing, I hear my name a lot when there's no sounds, anyways. I live a mostly, kind of sort of, normal life. Driving isn't really a problem, it's not my reaction times or decision making that's the issue, and the reality I see is doing weird shit, but I don't see things in the wrong place. But also, these aren't all happening all the time, abs if I get a few happening at once, I'll try and take it easy. Things have gotten better with the dissolution of my former relationship. A lot less random dramatic stress.
wrote on last edited by [email protected]Hey I am curious about how people experience hallucinations can I ask some questions?
Does being tired or sleepy effect it? For example just before falling asleep do you start hearing your voice more clearly or louder?
Do you actually see figures and people in front of you or is it more of a "I think I saw a black cat run in my peripheral vision" type of thing?
Thank you!
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I'm wondering if there being 99.99% humans would make them all more valuable. And sometimes I just think maybe it would be for the best. But that is a bit insane, so I push it aside. But being treated like living garbage really does give you some ideas
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I droped LSD while working at a fuel station and it was the only time that people came back in to see my boss to tell them how great of a server I was. I even had a cool conversation with two cops who came in, which was terrifying because I also had my bong and weed in the toilet room behind them.
The right dosage at the right time can unlock easy access flow state, it's a treat when it happens
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You can't just drop that with no details!
He got in a fight. Probably a piece of tooth got lodged in his hand for a couple days.
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My ideal partner would have exactly identical personality to me.
In highschool I would regularly imagine a "perfect crush" during bus rides. In my last year I had that "damn I was an edgy asshole during middle and highschool" moment and I wanted to change.
So since my friend group is also jerks like me I just started imitating that imaginary person until "fake it til you make it" kicked in.
Everything from my sense of humour to taste in music changed over time. I even became a slightly bit more feminine when I used to be hardcore Matt Walsh fan until this point.
I also got hobbies I just thought looked attractive like Archery. I got into computers because this.
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My knife collection began because I was suicidal.
To keep myself around I got a bunch of knives so I wouldn't pick a favorite and "dissapoint" the others.
...I got better.
Out of all the reasons/sotires I have heard about why people didnt kill themselves this is by far the most absurd.
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My knife collection began because I was suicidal.
To keep myself around I got a bunch of knives so I wouldn't pick a favorite and "dissapoint" the others.
...I got better.
Suppose I have it similar, don't remember when exactly I got into knives but was depressed since 14 so it correlates.
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Covid probably saved my life.
I got bullied for about 5-6 years in school which ultimatively led to me just wanting to kill myself. Luckily for me the lockdown came so I got freed from the nightmare called school. My will to live devinetively improved, when not getting bullied the whole time you are sitting in class. However, when being in the lockdown I devinetively didnt process my feelings and thoughts about how I wanted to end myself. This led to me having almost a fill scale emotional breakdown mid class when school started, since we have been reading a play where someone killed himself and therefore learned stuff about the whole topic of suicide/mental health. Suddenly you realise, that all this shit kind of sounds very familiar for you which was quite overwhelming, but you can't let anyone see whats happening because that shit devinetively is going to get you bullied again. I never talked to a therapist about this and at this point it isn't needed, since I just went on and processed that time of my life for myself. I also kind of realised some time ago, that I also never told my family about this, but it isn't really relevant anymore and us just going to cause feelings of guilt in them for not acting.
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I have no how many people I have killed probably alot wars crazy
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I spend time on google maps just browsing, learning where different places are in the world.
One time someone put a blurred out map showing their location and I knew exactly where they were.
I promise never to use this power for evil.
Found Rainbolt's Lemmy account
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I'm wondering if there being 99.99% humans would make them all more valuable. And sometimes I just think maybe it would be for the best. But that is a bit insane, so I push it aside. But being treated like living garbage really does give you some ideas
wrote on last edited by [email protected]Do you mean 99.99% fewer humans?
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I can see true magenta. And it ain't pink.
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Covid probably saved my life.
I got bullied for about 5-6 years in school which ultimatively led to me just wanting to kill myself. Luckily for me the lockdown came so I got freed from the nightmare called school. My will to live devinetively improved, when not getting bullied the whole time you are sitting in class. However, when being in the lockdown I devinetively didnt process my feelings and thoughts about how I wanted to end myself. This led to me having almost a fill scale emotional breakdown mid class when school started, since we have been reading a play where someone killed himself and therefore learned stuff about the whole topic of suicide/mental health. Suddenly you realise, that all this shit kind of sounds very familiar for you which was quite overwhelming, but you can't let anyone see whats happening because that shit devinetively is going to get you bullied again. I never talked to a therapist about this and at this point it isn't needed, since I just went on and processed that time of my life for myself. I also kind of realised some time ago, that I also never told my family about this, but it isn't really relevant anymore and us just going to cause feelings of guilt in them for not acting.
Therapy might still be a good idea in the future, trauma can show up in quite unexpected forms.
I'm really glad you're doing better!
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I can see true magenta. And it ain't pink.
Are you one of those 4-cones people?
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Jesus fuck that sounds bad... sorry about that.
That shop took a lot of shortcuts on safety. I had to pull a dude out of a mill to prevent a 2" drill going into his head because he tripped into it. Never again will I standby as I put my own hands at risk for efficiency over safety.
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I kicked a decrepit german shepard to death.
::: spoiler WHY?!
Wasn't my fault really, the owner had trained his dog to be aggressive and I was deathly afraid of dogs. The animal escaped the leash and charged me, I don't know if it would have bitten me, but I instinctively kicked it in the face... I'm an extremely overweight guy and was scared shitless, that's propably why my leg had some serious power behind it, so I kicked that poor puppies snout straight into its braincase.Still have nightmares of that day. Good news is: I have sinced learned to be less afraid and love dogs now. I even regularly put my hand down the throat of a huge japanese Akita Inu who loves me to death and pull on his teeth in play.
:::Good on you, it's the owners fault. I really hate most dog owners, they just let their dogs off the leash and let them come up to you, not giving a shit whether the person is afraid of dogs or not or basically taking the risk for someone else.
Since having a daughter every time I'm out and there's dogs I hate having to imagine how I'd save her from an attack and how I'd either have to try killing it or escaping.
They have the audacity to say "don't worry they won't harm her" when I pick my daughter up to stop them getting near. "No fuck you and leash your dog"
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My knife collection began because I was suicidal.
To keep myself around I got a bunch of knives so I wouldn't pick a favorite and "dissapoint" the others.
...I got better.
You know, that is one of the most creative safety solutions I have heard. Glad you came up with it (probably due to still wanting to fight). The fight never stops, hope you are still doing well.
