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  3. ‘If I switch it off, my girlfriend might think I’m cheating’: inside the rise of couples location sharing

‘If I switch it off, my girlfriend might think I’m cheating’: inside the rise of couples location sharing

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  • C [email protected]

    Would you mind sharing your automation yaml for the garden lights? I'd love to do more with Bluetooth beacons but don't know enough about how they work to do anything with them.

    M This user is from outside of this forum
    M This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote last edited by
    #367

    We have it hidden in the letterbox. The mobile app has a Bluetooth beacon setting where you can have it report either specified beacons to HA, or all of them and you can filter for the ones you want at that end.

    The automation looks for the beacon to be reported from either of 2 devices and then switches the lights on, quite basic.

    We have a separate automation that turns the scanning for beacons setting in the phone app on at dusk and off at 3am. And another that turns the garden lights off after 10 min triggered by them being switched on

    description: ""
    mode: single
    triggers:
      - value_template: >-
          {{ state_attr('sensor.phone1_beacon_monitor',
          'b5b182c7-eab1-4988-aa99-bd9_1_2') != None  }}
        trigger: template
      - value_template: >-
          {{ state_attr('sensor.phone2_beacon_monitor',
          'b5b182c7-eab1-4988-aa99-bd9_1_2') != None  }}
        trigger: template
    conditions: []
    actions:
      - data: {}
        target:
          entity_id:
            - switch.garden_lights
            - switch.deck_light_table
            - switch.deck_light_bbq
        action: switch.turn_on
      - event: beaconDetected
        event_data: {}
      - if:
          - condition: numeric_state
            entity_id: zone.home
            below: 1
        then:
          - data: {}
            target:
              device_id:
                - b5c12ce8343fda7810b69c24f
                - a71515f86d7d34ef570acbe8
            action: light.turn_on
    
    1 Reply Last reply
    1
    • S [email protected]

      Sounds like you guys have some serious trust issues. If sharing your location with each other devolves that quickly, it ain’t the tech making problems.

      S This user is from outside of this forum
      S This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote last edited by
      #368

      I already stated that it only happened once at the start of the relationship. I trust my partner completely and she has never second-guessed me since.

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • T [email protected]

        This says otherwise https://geofinder.mobi/blog/does-location-sharing-drain-battery/

        cole@lemdro.idC This user is from outside of this forum
        cole@lemdro.idC This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote last edited by
        #369

        that might as well be AI generated. there are no numbers, just some dumb matrix with arbitrary reasoning and now evidence. I'm all for evidence to the contrary, but this is not that

        T 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • W [email protected]

          This has nothing to do with the tracking.

          what is "this"? location sharing apps? if yes, why do you think these are unrelated?

          You should have the same problem with anyone that has location turned on in their phone.

          I don't care about a random person having location turned on. why should I? there's plenty of offline uses for that function, I use it regularly. maps, sports tracking, reminders, ...

          , as we use Google maps to navigate as is. I reject the premise that I'm violating someone else's privacy by doing so.

          that's ok, when it only affects you. but when you are navigating to a friend's place, with this thinking you are just ignorant about what is actually happening. I'm genuinely sorry to point this out.

          this is a bit similar to when people refuse the fact that by uploading a picture of someone to facebook they might be violating their privacy.
          or when people haphazardly allow contacts access to random apps, or to apps like facebook messenger because it asks so nicely, and then disclaim responsibility over where does that contact information go.

          You certainly wouldn't have the right to ask someone to turn something like that off simply because you don't trust the corporations on the other end,

          not just the corporations, but the tech hygiene of the average person. I am aware that it sounds bad, and I hate it that it is warranted.

          E This user is from outside of this forum
          E This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote last edited by [email protected]
          #370

          Are you seriously arguing that navigating to someone's house with Google maps is violating their privacy? When I do share my location, I'm sharing through Google maps, directly to my wife's Google account. Google can already see my location for maps purposes. They have obtained no new information. If you are in fact arguing that using Google maps violates the privacy of anyone you navigate to, then I just don't agree and can't take you seriously. If you're arguing that somehow sharing my location to my wife's account in Google maps is somehow fundamentally different for privacy than using Google maps is already, then I just don't understand you. You're okay with people using maps but not sharing their location within those maps apps. That's a very confusing moral stance.

          W 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • return2ozma@lemmy.worldR [email protected]
            This post did not contain any content.
            V This user is from outside of this forum
            V This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote last edited by
            #371

            ‘If I switch it off, my girlfriend might think I’m cheating’ - then fuck your girlfriend. How can you be in a relationship without trust?

            L 1 Reply Last reply
            7
            • I [email protected]

              Yes, most sane persons I know have disavowed the entire concept of being with someone else.
              And archaic leftover of a more dependant age.
              Now it's just handcuffs with no upside
              Ending cheating is as easy as ending "being in a couple"
              and for people who can imagine life without this crutch
              it becomes more and more foreign why anyone
              would ever accept such an oppressive custom into their household

              R This user is from outside of this forum
              R This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote last edited by
              #372

              Could you explain what you mean by calling it an oppressive custom? Personally, I love being with someone. It has the upside of me getting to enjoy companionship with another human being, and it doesn't feel like handcuffs. Sometimes I have to do things that I wouldn't do otherwise for the sake of my partner's feelings/wellbeing, but isn't that the case in all relationships? Romantic, familial, platonic, or otherwise? If my partner wants me to do something I'm truly uncomfortable with (like allowing them to track my location), and we can't agree on a compromise, I'd just end that relationship and find someone I'm more compatible with.

              I 1 Reply Last reply
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              • dozzi92@lemmy.worldD [email protected]

                Yeah, my wife has mine and I know she doesn't use it as often as she could, because I'll get the text, and I'll be like hey, just check the location. Both or jobs take us different places every day (that we aren't home), and so neither of us have a schedule, and so rather than the same texts every day, "When you home," when we're trying to figure out the kids, or dinner, or camps, or I have to go to work at night, or she has a book club meeting, or whatever other myriad things happen every day, we can skip that step. Or we have the ability to, and my wife forgets about it.

                I This user is from outside of this forum
                I This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote last edited by [email protected]
                #373

                Having a shared calendar has been a godsend for us. Honestly we would each probably miss like half of our appointments if my the other wasn't able to say "hey don't you have that thing...?" or "hey aren't the kids supposed to be at that place in twenty minutes...?". I can imagine location sharing makes that even easier because you'd know if it's even possible for them to make it, or if you need to get them ready or whatever.

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • cole@lemdro.idC [email protected]

                  that might as well be AI generated. there are no numbers, just some dumb matrix with arbitrary reasoning and now evidence. I'm all for evidence to the contrary, but this is not that

                  T This user is from outside of this forum
                  T This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote last edited by
                  #374

                  While I can't find any source to back up my claim that it certainly drains some amount of battery, can you provide any evidence that it doesn't impact battery life? Given that GPS uses significant processing power

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • starman2112@sh.itjust.worksS [email protected]

                    My best friend drove me to work the other day. We missed a turn and had to take a detour. Not two blocks after that missed turn, his girlfriend calls him asking where he's going lmao

                    I would be willing to share locations because I worry about people and don't want them to worry about me, but I'll toss this phone in a Blendtec blender before I install an application that gives some creep in fuckin Dayton Ohio my and my girlfriend's GPS coordinates 24/7. Tasker does the job well enough anyhow

                    jackbydev@programming.devJ This user is from outside of this forum
                    jackbydev@programming.devJ This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote last edited by
                    #375

                    I'll toss this phone in a Blendtec blender

                    Oof, iSmoke. Don't breathe this!

                    captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC 1 Reply Last reply
                    1
                    • P [email protected]

                      I've never really bothered with relationships, and everytime I see some shit like this, it validates that choice.

                      jackbydev@programming.devJ This user is from outside of this forum
                      jackbydev@programming.devJ This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote last edited by
                      #376

                      This is atypical.

                      O 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • return2ozma@lemmy.worldR [email protected]
                        This post did not contain any content.
                        jackbydev@programming.devJ This user is from outside of this forum
                        jackbydev@programming.devJ This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote last edited by
                        #377

                        This article constantly reloads and alternates between showing and hiding some warning about my privacy lol. Unreadable.

                        My wife and I have it on Google Maps. I can't remember why, but we've had it for years. I think my wife worries if I'm safe sometimes. I think I check it less than once a year. I checked it once to see if they were on their way home once, that's about it.

                        M 1 Reply Last reply
                        3
                        • J [email protected]

                          Install a ROM on your phone and claim it no longer works on there 🙂

                          viking@infosec.pubV This user is from outside of this forum
                          viking@infosec.pubV This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote last edited by
                          #378

                          Yeah right, rather than stand your ground, lie in your partners face.

                          J 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • jackbydev@programming.devJ [email protected]

                            This is atypical.

                            O This user is from outside of this forum
                            O This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote last edited by
                            #379

                            It CC we's not uncommon honestly. From someone in their mid twenties I'd say at minimum 40% of people I know in a relationship have something like this set up and that's being generous. I've never done it and no person I've dated has pushed it but it's far from atypical

                            jackbydev@programming.devJ 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • O [email protected]

                              Please !ever get within fifty feet of anyone doijg anything you think is remotely spicy, for your safety and theirs.

                              S This user is from outside of this forum
                              S This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote last edited by
                              #380

                              Now I'm just confused.

                              O 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • S [email protected]

                                Now I'm just confused.

                                O This user is from outside of this forum
                                O This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote last edited by [email protected]
                                #381

                                You're a danger to yourself and those around you. And it doesn't seem malevolent, which is scarier.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • jackbydev@programming.devJ [email protected]

                                  This article constantly reloads and alternates between showing and hiding some warning about my privacy lol. Unreadable.

                                  My wife and I have it on Google Maps. I can't remember why, but we've had it for years. I think my wife worries if I'm safe sometimes. I think I check it less than once a year. I checked it once to see if they were on their way home once, that's about it.

                                  M This user is from outside of this forum
                                  M This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #382

                                  I check ours frequently just to see when he'll be home from work, because I leave for my job when he gets home due to young kids.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  1
                                  • O [email protected]

                                    It CC we's not uncommon honestly. From someone in their mid twenties I'd say at minimum 40% of people I know in a relationship have something like this set up and that's being generous. I've never done it and no person I've dated has pushed it but it's far from atypical

                                    jackbydev@programming.devJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                    jackbydev@programming.devJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #383

                                    I mean believing you're cheating if you protest.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • P [email protected]

                                      if you believe the only reason your partner isn't cheating is that you'd find out via location share; what the fuck is the point?

                                      P This user is from outside of this forum
                                      P This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote last edited by [email protected]
                                      #384

                                      There's always gps spoofing via debug mode too. So it's not like sharing gps is even reliable

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • V [email protected]

                                        ‘If I switch it off, my girlfriend might think I’m cheating’ - then fuck your girlfriend. How can you be in a relationship without trust?

                                        L This user is from outside of this forum
                                        L This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #385

                                        I feel like this shit would end badly for everyone.

                                        Remember how people used to lie and say they were sleeping over at their friend's house or going to so and sos so they wouldn't have to say where they were. Now I guess they can hand their phone to their friend at school/bus and tell them to take it home and carry their watch/tablet/laptop that they can get/respond to texts without the tracking location being on with that device.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • jackbydev@programming.devJ [email protected]

                                          I'll toss this phone in a Blendtec blender

                                          Oof, iSmoke. Don't breathe this!

                                          captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC This user is from outside of this forum
                                          captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #386

                                          I think they did an iPhone, I know for a fact they did an iPad.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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