smart bed
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I sleep in a racecar bed because I'm a big boy.
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Note that I bought a Pod earlier on and have been upgraded to Pod 4 from warranty due to leak. It was obnoxiously cloud controlled from the start, but originally was much cheaper than now and it included a mattress and there was no mandatory monthly fee to just use the damn thing. I will give them credit that the Pod 4 is quite comfortable, the cooling/heating is nice, and the device is nice and quiet. For the most part the hardware design hits it out of the park, except for their aversion to local controls, which seems mostly driven by their software bullshit.
So first, that hardware control they added isn't exactly awesome. People kept demanding buttons on the base or a remote or something. They smugly declared that modeling the earbud 'tap N times to do an operation' was the "correct" way because remotes are too easy to lose and no one would want to touch the base. Earbuds have to settle for that crap because of lack of surface area to control, your whole ass bed doesn't have to make concessions to crappy hardware UI. So now I have double tap, or triple tap that has different meanings based on context, and even then only if the bed is 'on' which you can only do from the app and it turns itself 'off' automatically, so you can't just 'cheat' and use the local hardware controls because those only are enabled at the behest of their bullshit cloud service.
For the software side, it's trying to force you to go to their servers for no damn reason for the consumer. It will only deign to talk to a smartphone long enough to get connected to their cloud presence, and only toward that function. It also wants to "auto-control" your temperature and will frequently decide it knows better than you how you want the temperature to be and auto-adjust. It general the whole thing reeks of "we are smarter than you, and we will be all weird about all sorts of facets of this thing".
And of course, it shows in their pricing. They got rid of the mattress and raised the price to $3,000 for just the cover and also now mandate a $17/month subscription plan on top of that for new customers (we grandfathered into the old situation, no monthly plan as well as what was a more reasonably priced product).
No way in hell would I buy it as it stands now, but if they at least enabled local control, ditched the monthly payment requirement bullshit and cut the price back, then I would be an unambiguous fan.
Why the fuck would anyone buy this?
I hate that there is (apparently) an actual market for this product. We live in a society of idiots.
Uhh no offense to you since I kind of included you in the idiots category there.
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Meanwhile, I built the bed I sleep in. Literally. My bed is made from solid Douglas fir and southern yellow pine, hand made into a proper bed frame that will last multiple lifetimes if taken care of. Want the bed heated/cooled? Fill a rubber bladder with hot water or ice. There. No fucking app required.
You make a sweet headboard on that bad boy?
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If you can't hack the bed I'm not sleeping with you ever again
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I had to Google this.. I hate this shit. How brain dead do you have to be to buy a bed with a subscription service!? This is some cybertruck level bullshit
Agreed, I've got a normal-assed king size bed with a regular dumb heated blanket and different sheets for summer and winter. I'm sure as fuck not gonna pay some company a monthly fee to dictate the capabilities of my bed.
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I've never even heard of a heated bed. Bitch, it's called a blanket. You get under it and your body heat will keep you warm.
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I sleep in a racecar bed because I'm a big boy.
My mom’s gonna get me a radio so I can talk to all the other car beds.
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You make a sweet headboard on that bad boy?
wrote on last edited by [email protected]Of course!
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Meanwhile, I built the bed I sleep in. Literally. My bed is made from solid Douglas fir and southern yellow pine, hand made into a proper bed frame that will last multiple lifetimes if taken care of. Want the bed heated/cooled? Fill a rubber bladder with hot water or ice. There. No fucking app required.
Even if you use plain construction pine with a simple design, it'll probably last longer than you do. That's what we did.
We had a bed frame from a "nice" furniture store, and when I saw it going in, I knew immediately it wasn't going to last. Lots of parts with screws that were really shallow and would back out easily. They had to be shallow because the wood was so thin. Hard to tell when it's at the store, but watching the delivery people put it together, it was obvious.
Did a few things to keep it together, but once it broke beyond reasonable repair, I made a simple platform bed frame and called it good. Has lots more underbed storage space and you could probably build a tank on top of it.
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That's not a smart bed, that's an internet-connected revenue-extractor.
It gets better, there's a monthly fee
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Even if you use plain construction pine with a simple design, it'll probably last longer than you do. That's what we did.
We had a bed frame from a "nice" furniture store, and when I saw it going in, I knew immediately it wasn't going to last. Lots of parts with screws that were really shallow and would back out easily. They had to be shallow because the wood was so thin. Hard to tell when it's at the store, but watching the delivery people put it together, it was obvious.
Did a few things to keep it together, but once it broke beyond reasonable repair, I made a simple platform bed frame and called it good. Has lots more underbed storage space and you could probably build a tank on top of it.
Yup. The bed was my first big woodworking project, and I just made it out of some construction lumber as well, though with a lot of working. I built it off one of the Ana White designs.
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I sleep in a racecar bed because I'm a big boy.
Yeah, but it's a sweet car bed. Did you get the CB radio installed yet so you can talk to other car beds?
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I've never even heard of a heated bed. Bitch, it's called a blanket. You get under it and your body heat will keep you warm.
I believe the problem is that it's actively cooled, so it won't get hotter under a blanket.
He could always unplug it though...
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I thought this was a writing prompt for some future dystopian hell but, no, turns out it's our current dystopian hell.
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I want a bed that can cool itself. That sounds awesome. But make it work "stupidly" instead of being "smart."
Watercooling seems like a smart idea, but yeah, as dumb as possible. It's fine to add smarts to it later, but the basic functionality should be 100% "dumb".
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For a minute, I thought this was satire.
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"AI controlled" 🤪
When did having basic microprocessors become AI controlled?
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I believe the problem is that it's actively cooled, so it won't get hotter under a blanket.
He could always unplug it though...
"An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience." - Mitch Hedberg
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For a minute, I thought this was satire.
wrote on last edited by [email protected]It isn't?
EDIT: After some searching, turns out it is not.
https://www.eightsleep.com/uk/
What kind of a moron would spend £3000 on something that then needs a subscription to work?
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It isn't?
EDIT: After some searching, turns out it is not.
https://www.eightsleep.com/uk/
What kind of a moron would spend £3000 on something that then needs a subscription to work?
I know, right? Thermostats have worked since (and were invented some time in) the 1600's, but now... no, no no... we've got to loop in "the whole internet" as a dependency (not to mention one's smartphone, and probably a payment system for an ongoing monthly subscription). Even with the incentive of being continuously paid, they can't keep it working, because it has gotten too complex and greed has gummed up the gears.
