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  3. Men are opening up about mental health to AI instead of humans

Men are opening up about mental health to AI instead of humans

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  • T [email protected]

    Your comment is just very one sided and that’s the side that has the most power on the planet and as a member of that side I have just as much perspective of you and I’m here to say – nah to most of what you said.

    The only 'side' that has power is the wealthy. But keep banging your gender war drum, it probably gives you meaning and purpose in life to collectively blame 'me'n for all the worlds ills as if anyone who has a penis or wants a penis is entirely the same.

    Drink that kool aid. yum yum. Donald Trump and his buddies thank you for your vote.

    doom@ttrpg.networkD This user is from outside of this forum
    doom@ttrpg.networkD This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by
    #153

    This is why you sucked in therapy and found it unhelpful. You're pissy, jaded and uncomfortable with the concept of being wrong. Classic men shit.

    Empathy would fix that, show that you don't have to be so insecure because nobody else is that secure.

    J 1 Reply Last reply
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    • pupbiru@aussie.zoneP [email protected]

      i’d like to be very clear here… a lot of discussion about men’s spaces is thinly veiled sexism by incels… that doesn’t mean there’s not a problem, it just means that incels are attracted to “it’s not my fault”

      that said, there’s a comment up thread that captures it pretty well

      … mental health professionals all my 'issues' were blow way out of proportion … always 100% told me everything that happens to me is entirely my fault. they also told me it was normal/healthy to vent my feelings by doing productive things (like writing, exercising, relaxing), rather than viewing that as 'not addressing the problem'.

      the issue with so much of this crap is that not only does nobody want to talk to men, it's that they don't want to listen and/or the tell us we are 'talking wrong'. even when we do talk to people, there is only a tiny window of acceptable things we an talk about and way we can talk about them or how selfish it is of him to vent/indulge his legitimate emotions.

      … a man bursts into tears over his father dying of cancer and all the sudden everyone wants to tell him his reaction is too intense … someone in his life try to get him to 'open up' and then we he does he's met with nothing but hostility, disappointment, and eventually rejection

      it’s a meme (not in a “haha” joke way: in the actual meaning of the world; a thing that is repeated often) these days that there are horrible men who tell women (re sexism) “you must have misunderstood”… and the point of that is that men don’t have the life experience as a minority to be able to understand sexism, transphobia, etc (people treat them differently, and even if they see it they often can’t identify it because they’re not accustomed to listening for it 24/7)

      that same situation exists for men too… men are certainly not a minority, but nobody is allowed to say that someone’s experience is invalid… there’s a lot of people dismissing these experiences in this thread, and if it were reversed: a woman complaining about a man making a sexist comment, a gay man (of which i’m one) complaining about homophobia, there wouldn’t be any pushback at all because we’ve come to agree that this shit happens

      we know that toxic masculinity exists, we know that societal expectations of men are sky high (the suicide rate for men in particular is HUGE)… we’re clearly doing something wrong, as a society, dealing with male mental health… when people come out and tell us their experiences, it absolutely is sexist to write off those experiences as invalid: “i don’t think that kind of thing happens because i haven’t seen it”, is absolutely (anything)-ist language

      is it on the same level as problem as sexism or racism? probably not… but denying the problem helps nobody… denying the problem, in this case, makes the problem so much worse and pushes people to lash out and become sexist, racist, homophobic, etc (which is also not to remove blame from them - all those things are wrong and a personal choice and should have personal repercussions)

      G This user is from outside of this forum
      G This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote on last edited by
      #154

      I expected you to mean people exhibiting toxicity and not reporting about it. I was surprised because the comments seemed civil at large. Thank you.

      pupbiru@aussie.zoneP 1 Reply Last reply
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      • D [email protected]

        What a clickbait. Of course people are picking feee resource with zero friction over 120$ an hour half a day event.

        pupbiru@aussie.zoneP This user is from outside of this forum
        pupbiru@aussie.zoneP This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #155

        in australia we have (limited) free mental health services (i wanna say 8 free sessions with a therapist?)… this still holds true

        it’s not only about money

        Z 1 Reply Last reply
        1
        • B [email protected]

          Who said I am a dude?

          doom@ttrpg.networkD This user is from outside of this forum
          doom@ttrpg.networkD This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by
          #156

          Dude is nongendered everyone is a dude, nice try tho trying to pull this though

          B 1 Reply Last reply
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          • pupbiru@aussie.zoneP [email protected]

            in australia we have (limited) free mental health services (i wanna say 8 free sessions with a therapist?)… this still holds true

            it’s not only about money

            Z This user is from outside of this forum
            Z This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote on last edited by
            #157

            Another aussie here, Headspace is great too

            pupbiru@aussie.zoneP 1 Reply Last reply
            1
            • G [email protected]

              I expected you to mean people exhibiting toxicity and not reporting about it. I was surprised because the comments seemed civil at large. Thank you.

              pupbiru@aussie.zoneP This user is from outside of this forum
              pupbiru@aussie.zoneP This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote on last edited by [email protected]
              #158

              yeah id say it’s not overt, but that’s kinda the problem… it’s almost difficult to identify, so when it comes to mental health for men a lot of the time society, therapists, etc almost gaslights us into thinking our problems aren’t problems

              if it were overt it’d be easy to identify… the fact what it’s not, the fact that men are the majority, and are the problem in a lot of cases pushes people to certain conclusions (including ourselves about our own problems)

              mental health is complex af

              T 1 Reply Last reply
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              • doom@ttrpg.networkD [email protected]

                Dude is nongendered everyone is a dude, nice try tho trying to pull this though

                B This user is from outside of this forum
                B This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #159

                I don't agree

                doom@ttrpg.networkD 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • Z [email protected]

                  Another aussie here, Headspace is great too

                  pupbiru@aussie.zoneP This user is from outside of this forum
                  pupbiru@aussie.zoneP This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #160

                  yup! and absolutely worth the mention that if you’re queer (qlife), struggling with specific issues - alcohol, gambling, finance, eating disorders, etc - there’s specific support available to a lot of people in australia, the US, europe, etc

                  if you need help, help is available! find one of these services who can help you find the specific support that you need, and go from there 🙂

                  as a gay man, i found a lot more help when i started seeing services that specialised in queer health 🙂

                  yall deserve someone who understands what you’re going through in life

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  1
                  • B [email protected]

                    A profound relational revolution is underway, not orchestrated by tech developers but driven by users themselves. Many of the 400 million weekly users of ChatGPT are seeking more than just assistance with emails or information on food safety; they are looking for emotional support.

                    “Therapy and companionship” have emerged as two of the most frequent applications for generative AI globally, according to the Harvard Business Review. This trend marks a significant, unplanned pivot in how people interact with technology.

                    kingthrillgore@lemmy.mlK This user is from outside of this forum
                    kingthrillgore@lemmy.mlK This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                    #161

                    Of course men will go to an AI for their problems, they can't fathom going to a woman for honest advice.

                    And as a result, they gaslight themselves with a worse version of ELIZA.

                    modernrisk@lemmy.dbzer0.comM nostradavid@programming.devN 2 Replies Last reply
                    1
                    • B [email protected]

                      But keep screaming that anything that disagrees with your particular narrative that women are great and perpetual victims of men and men are always bad, I guess?

                      Incel talk

                      V This user is from outside of this forum
                      V This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #162

                      read the whole comment

                      B 1 Reply Last reply
                      3
                      • T [email protected]

                        Amen.

                        There is a boatload of bad therapists and bad therapy out there. And sadly it gets a lot more traction and popularity because well... it's simplistic and easy. It's the fast food of therapy.

                        Good therapy is hard and long and complex. And most people simple don't want to deal with that. They want the diet pill version of therapy. Just make the bad feelings go away, and give me more good feelings.

                        I don't think enough analogies are drawn between physical vs mental health. Anyone knows that legit physical health is a long and boring process that takes a lot of discipline and time. Mental health and wellness really isn't any different. Therapists should also be more like physical trainers... you need to have a specific goal in mind and work towards that goal and really and the endgame should be to no longer need the physical trainer/therapist

                        Sadly in our economic system the incentive for a lot of people is the opposite and many bad therapist/trainers just want to generate dependency of their clients on themselves and as such they will indulge their clients worse habits to keep them hooked.

                        a_random_idiot@lemmy.worldA This user is from outside of this forum
                        a_random_idiot@lemmy.worldA This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #163

                        Yeah.

                        and there needs to be more oversight and punishment for objectively bad therapists. and I dont mean bad as in their program didnt work for you, i mean bad, like ones that spend an entire session fellating themselves over how awesome they are, or tell you that they arent here to listen to you bitch and moan about your problems (someone I knew had a therapist say that to them) or whatever other objectively awful things bad therapists too.

                        and there needs to be more education about therapy, and how there are many different styles and approaches.. and not all work for everyone, The system should incentivize people being able to tell their therapist they appreciate their time, but it doesnt feel like their approach is working, and get refered to a different one with a different approach without drama, extra cost, extra paperwork, or headache.

                        T 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • kingthrillgore@lemmy.mlK [email protected]

                          Of course men will go to an AI for their problems, they can't fathom going to a woman for honest advice.

                          And as a result, they gaslight themselves with a worse version of ELIZA.

                          modernrisk@lemmy.dbzer0.comM This user is from outside of this forum
                          modernrisk@lemmy.dbzer0.comM This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #164

                          Of course men will go to an AI for their problems, they can't fathom going to a woman for honest advice.

                          This seems a bit far-fetched, don’t you think? There could be so many reasons as to why someone would rather use AI than going to another person for advice (this is not just about women).

                          Honestly, as someone who actually went to therapy and yes, my therapist was a woman. It’s was quite tough to open up and be vulnerable.

                          I think for some people using AI, they might feel as if they’re not that vulnerable because it is not a person. However, they don’t realize that there’s data is being gathered.

                          And as a result, they gaslight themselves with a worse version of ELIZA.

                          With this, I can’t figure out whether you’re serious, trolling or just writing randomly.

                          1 Reply Last reply
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                          • B [email protected]

                            I don't agree

                            doom@ttrpg.networkD This user is from outside of this forum
                            doom@ttrpg.networkD This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #165

                            good thing you're an authority on nothing then

                            revelrous@sopuli.xyzR 1 Reply Last reply
                            1
                            • P [email protected]

                              Focus on fixing your country and making it a decent place to live. That way you don't need to go anywhere. That's what we've been doing for decades, and it works.

                              S This user is from outside of this forum
                              S This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #166

                              You are the one that made this all about what does and doesn't apply to a specific area or country, into being a pro or anti whatever specific nationality discussion.

                              Like I don't disagree that we should fix our own country, it is our responsibility... but you could have just said 'Damn, is it really that bad in the States?' or something like that, without being dismissive and hostile for... basically the only reason is you're tired of hearing about America I guess?

                              ???

                              Sorry I exist?

                              P 1 Reply Last reply
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                              • T [email protected]

                                what makes you think their gender is even relevant to their practice?

                                spankmonkey@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                                spankmonkey@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #167

                                They are human beings who are more frequently able to relate to people who are similar to them based on shared experiences including social pressures. I don't think either gender is unable to relate to the other gender, but social pressure is pretty strong and leads to common outcomes that involve pressures based race, gender, and economic status among others. Someone from a wealthy family is more likely to have a certain outlook compared to someone who had food insecurity as a child.

                                T 1 Reply Last reply
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                                • doom@ttrpg.networkD [email protected]

                                  This is why you sucked in therapy and found it unhelpful. You're pissy, jaded and uncomfortable with the concept of being wrong. Classic men shit.

                                  Empathy would fix that, show that you don't have to be so insecure because nobody else is that secure.

                                  J This user is from outside of this forum
                                  J This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                                  #168

                                  I thought it wasn't gender specific? This is very sexist of you. wags finger

                                  See how unhelpful that is to the conversation

                                  doom@ttrpg.networkD 1 Reply Last reply
                                  4
                                  • a_random_idiot@lemmy.worldA [email protected]

                                    Yeah.

                                    and there needs to be more oversight and punishment for objectively bad therapists. and I dont mean bad as in their program didnt work for you, i mean bad, like ones that spend an entire session fellating themselves over how awesome they are, or tell you that they arent here to listen to you bitch and moan about your problems (someone I knew had a therapist say that to them) or whatever other objectively awful things bad therapists too.

                                    and there needs to be more education about therapy, and how there are many different styles and approaches.. and not all work for everyone, The system should incentivize people being able to tell their therapist they appreciate their time, but it doesnt feel like their approach is working, and get refered to a different one with a different approach without drama, extra cost, extra paperwork, or headache.

                                    T This user is from outside of this forum
                                    T This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #169

                                    yes, there is an incredibly amount of ignorance, and a lack of oversight about the entire thing.

                                    and so many internet jackasses who think they are experts about it, constantly pushing endless misinformation about every aspect of the process. esp the armchair diagnosing.

                                    'oh you had a bad day at work? you must have autism/adhd/depression/personality disorder'. or the fact anyone who was ever mean to you once in your life is a 'narcissist' or 'gas lighting' you.

                                    the bias confirmation is out of hand. even in this very comment thread... soooo many people just banging on their bias confirmation drum and screaming 'no no no no, men are bad and should just go away and solve their own problems without bothering anyone at all ever!' as if that attitude isn't the biggest reason men, especially young men, feel so trapped about their lives.

                                    M 1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • B [email protected]

                                      Nonsense. The idea that all psychological issues are defined by gender is just the perspective of someone who's never made any meaningful progress through therapy and/or counseling. Mental health is not a gendered issue and the repetition of this misconception just leads more people to give up without even trying. Yes, the lens of sexual identity comes into play, mainly in terms of cultural gender roles experienced in your part of the world. But, a well trained, experienced therapist will have these considerations while exploring issues you present with. I would argue, that psychiatrists (which is an even moreso male dominated field) are much more of an issue, because their objective is not to help you come to conclusions about yourself. It is to medicate your symptoms away to allow you to function. I am sorry you did not have a good experience yourself, but that is not reflective of therapy, or counseling as a whole and your characterisation of men vs women in therapy is sexist and sounds more like male influencer talking points than lived experience.

                                      T This user is from outside of this forum
                                      T This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                                      #170

                                      how many well trained therapists are there out there who are totally objective, compared to poorly trained ones who will often perpetual their harmful biases?

                                      does anyone know? how do we even measure that? do we just assume people who have a certain degree from a certain program are inherently 'objective'?

                                      B 1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • pupbiru@aussie.zoneP [email protected]

                                        The genders are massivenly different in a lot of ways

                                        and even if you think that the psychology of genders isn’t different, society treats genders differently and this either from the therapist who reacts differently to different genders, or from the patient who expects difference the point is the same: the construct of gender forces artificial difference, even if it’s not based in real “our brains are the same” science (which they aren’t - same as our biology isn’t quite the same)

                                        equity is different to equality, and equity is actually what is needed

                                        T This user is from outside of this forum
                                        T This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #171

                                        and even if you think that the psychology of genders isn’t different, society treats genders differently and this either from the therapist who reacts differently to different genders, or from the patient who expects difference the point is the same: the construct of gender forces artificial difference, even if it’s not based in real “our brains are the same” science (which they aren’t - same as our biology isn’t quite the same)

                                        amen. brother, sister, or whatever preferred identity you want to be.

                                        more treating people as individuals, less as treating them as stereotypes

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        3
                                        • J [email protected]

                                          I thought it wasn't gender specific? This is very sexist of you. wags finger

                                          See how unhelpful that is to the conversation

                                          doom@ttrpg.networkD This user is from outside of this forum
                                          doom@ttrpg.networkD This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #172

                                          What the fuck? Can you read?

                                          Coping Skills are not gender specific. What a dope.

                                          S 1 Reply Last reply
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