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bisexual

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Lemmy Shitpost
lemmyshitpost
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  • kolanaki@pawb.socialK [email protected]

    I like to think they're jealous that we get rejected twice as much as anyone else.

    G This user is from outside of this forum
    G This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by
    #33

    I never understood biphobia, a bi person choosing to be in a relationship with you means that they chose you out of everybody. It should be a feeling of flattery, not paranoia.

    heythisisnttheymca@lemmy.worldH 1 Reply Last reply
    9
    • G [email protected]

      The most biphobic people I've ever seen are gay people. They hate bi people more than your average straight homophobe hates gay people. It's really weird.

      H This user is from outside of this forum
      H This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote on last edited by
      #34

      Pick a hole and stick with it, I guess.

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • B [email protected]

        While the joke is indisputably funny, it’s important to remind everyone that it’s still a harmful stereotype. Bi/pan erasure is a genuine problem. You don’t stop being bi/pan simply because you enter a monogamous relationship.

        underpantsweevil@lemmy.worldU This user is from outside of this forum
        underpantsweevil@lemmy.worldU This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #35

        More seriously, I think erasure is only part of it. Lots of LGBTQ folks deliberately remain in the closet for the sake of family relationships, careers, and local politics.

        If you're bi, it's just easier.

        But that heterosexual camouflage does get confusing to process when you "come out". Especially with the reactionary attitude that heterosexuality is a choice.

        1 Reply Last reply
        3
        • G [email protected]

          The most biphobic people I've ever seen are gay people. They hate bi people more than your average straight homophobe hates gay people. It's really weird.

          bigbananadealer@lemm.eeB This user is from outside of this forum
          bigbananadealer@lemm.eeB This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by
          #36

          reminds me of the scene in chasing amy where alyssa gets ostracized by her lesbian club because shes now dating a guy

          1 Reply Last reply
          2
          • G [email protected]

            I mean it's obviously different from person to person, but the gay people I've met, especially lesbians, have a genuine irrational fear and hatred of bi people. They're terrified that bi people will cheat on them or will leave them for straight people. They see them as straight people who are pretending to be gay rather than actually being bi.

            C This user is from outside of this forum
            C This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote on last edited by
            #37

            At least anecdotally, I’ve seen it happen multiple times. There’s this subset in the dating pool who want to give meeting with other women a try.

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • T [email protected]

              Wellll, my wife is bi. I have a constant (not really constant, just when my insecurity is dragged out by a nightmare or something) nagging fear that she’ll leave me for a woman one day. (I’m a man).

              Maybe it’s just an extra layer because it potentially opens more doors.

              You know how some things people say just echo in your head forever? You hear a thousand points from a thousand people and most of it just goes in one ear and out the other, but something sticks for some reason or other and it just echoes in your brain.

              An idiot, misogynist, redneck said to me, “once ‘ey get uh little pussy it’s a matter uh time. They want it like anybody who wants it, and they won’t go without it forever.”

              When I’m feeling particularly insecure, that dumb shit just shows up in my brain.

              I’m aware that I’m being stupid. I don’t express this to my wife because I’m being stupid and I know it.

              Well, overly stupid people scream their insecurities out loud constantly.

              I’ve met some really, really stupid gay people. They’re people like anyone else, of course.

              The truth is, if I were to hand myself over to my sexuality entirely, I’d be fucking as many people as I could as often as possible. My sexuality isn’t all I am. It’s a small part of who I am. I just have to trust that my wife is as serious about us as I am. She hasn’t given me a reason not to trust her.

              I guess my point is, idiot+insecure=bigotry.

              If my wife ever leaves me for a woman, I won’t let it verify my insecurity. She could just as easily leave me for a man. No point in letting my insecurities make me a bigot. Gay people aren’t immune to bigotry.

              B This user is from outside of this forum
              B This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote on last edited by
              #38

              You said wise things, but I suggest considering expressing your wife these insecurities. Maybe that will help you come to terms with them and you can find some strategies so she can effectively reassure you.

              1 Reply Last reply
              2
              • sundray@lemmus.orgS [email protected]

                I won't pretend that some negative stereotypes about bisexuals don't originate from broken-hearted unisexual folks' lived experience (which is still no excuse to defame all bisexuals), but a lot -- A LOT -- of bisexual stereotypes and erasure comes from old-fashioned homophobia.

                F This user is from outside of this forum
                F This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #39

                Unisexuals when they see a unicycle

                sundray@lemmus.orgS 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • F [email protected]

                  Unisexuals when they see a unicycle

                  sundray@lemmus.orgS This user is from outside of this forum
                  sundray@lemmus.orgS This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #40

                  Or a unibrow.

                  Rrrrawwr.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • T [email protected]

                    Wellll, my wife is bi. I have a constant (not really constant, just when my insecurity is dragged out by a nightmare or something) nagging fear that she’ll leave me for a woman one day. (I’m a man).

                    Maybe it’s just an extra layer because it potentially opens more doors.

                    You know how some things people say just echo in your head forever? You hear a thousand points from a thousand people and most of it just goes in one ear and out the other, but something sticks for some reason or other and it just echoes in your brain.

                    An idiot, misogynist, redneck said to me, “once ‘ey get uh little pussy it’s a matter uh time. They want it like anybody who wants it, and they won’t go without it forever.”

                    When I’m feeling particularly insecure, that dumb shit just shows up in my brain.

                    I’m aware that I’m being stupid. I don’t express this to my wife because I’m being stupid and I know it.

                    Well, overly stupid people scream their insecurities out loud constantly.

                    I’ve met some really, really stupid gay people. They’re people like anyone else, of course.

                    The truth is, if I were to hand myself over to my sexuality entirely, I’d be fucking as many people as I could as often as possible. My sexuality isn’t all I am. It’s a small part of who I am. I just have to trust that my wife is as serious about us as I am. She hasn’t given me a reason not to trust her.

                    I guess my point is, idiot+insecure=bigotry.

                    If my wife ever leaves me for a woman, I won’t let it verify my insecurity. She could just as easily leave me for a man. No point in letting my insecurities make me a bigot. Gay people aren’t immune to bigotry.

                    B This user is from outside of this forum
                    B This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #41

                    I have very rarely had a bad outcome from speaking honestly and straightforwardly to people that I care about.

                    heythisisnttheymca@lemmy.worldH T 2 Replies Last reply
                    0
                    • obviouslynotbanana@lemmy.worldO [email protected]
                      This post did not contain any content.
                      rivalarrival@lemmy.todayR This user is from outside of this forum
                      rivalarrival@lemmy.todayR This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #42

                      I think you can only be properly bi if you're simultaneously railing a cishet female while being railed by a homosexual male.

                      /s

                      M weirdgoespro@lemmy.dbzer0.comW 2 Replies Last reply
                      4
                      • A [email protected]

                        Seriously? I have to tell my wife. She's sometimes open and sometimes closed to the idea of a threesome or just bisexuality.

                        D This user is from outside of this forum
                        D This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #43

                        From my experience its a little different for women.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • obviouslynotbanana@lemmy.worldO [email protected]
                          This post did not contain any content.
                          T This user is from outside of this forum
                          T This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #44

                          Hey, I'm in this meme!

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • G [email protected]

                            I never understood biphobia, a bi person choosing to be in a relationship with you means that they chose you out of everybody. It should be a feeling of flattery, not paranoia.

                            heythisisnttheymca@lemmy.worldH This user is from outside of this forum
                            heythisisnttheymca@lemmy.worldH This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #45

                            When I came out to my wife, that was her reaction. I picked damn well

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            1
                            • B [email protected]

                              I have very rarely had a bad outcome from speaking honestly and straightforwardly to people that I care about.

                              heythisisnttheymca@lemmy.worldH This user is from outside of this forum
                              heythisisnttheymca@lemmy.worldH This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #46

                              I grew up in a cult. After I got out, my experience generally mirrors yours but damn I have some family members.

                              B 1 Reply Last reply
                              1
                              • rivalarrival@lemmy.todayR [email protected]

                                I think you can only be properly bi if you're simultaneously railing a cishet female while being railed by a homosexual male.

                                /s

                                M This user is from outside of this forum
                                M This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                                #47

                                Lucky Pierre 👍🏽

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                1
                                • obviouslynotbanana@lemmy.worldO [email protected]
                                  This post did not contain any content.
                                  R This user is from outside of this forum
                                  R This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #48

                                  I always figured bi (or pansexual) was the default setting for humans. Most guys at least are flexible, if there is not a woman around any port in a storm, and if you weren't raised with any conditioning it seems more normal to love individuals, not categories.

                                  E C 2 Replies Last reply
                                  6
                                  • G [email protected]

                                    The most biphobic people I've ever seen are gay people. They hate bi people more than your average straight homophobe hates gay people. It's really weird.

                                    ladybutterfly@lemmy.worldL This user is from outside of this forum
                                    ladybutterfly@lemmy.worldL This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #49

                                    Yep it gets really nasty sometimes. We shouldn't be shitting on each other like that.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    4
                                    • sundray@lemmus.orgS [email protected]

                                      I won't pretend that some negative stereotypes about bisexuals don't originate from broken-hearted unisexual folks' lived experience (which is still no excuse to defame all bisexuals), but a lot -- A LOT -- of bisexual stereotypes and erasure comes from old-fashioned homophobia.

                                      ladybutterfly@lemmy.worldL This user is from outside of this forum
                                      ladybutterfly@lemmy.worldL This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #50

                                      That's an excellent point

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • R [email protected]

                                        I always figured bi (or pansexual) was the default setting for humans. Most guys at least are flexible, if there is not a woman around any port in a storm, and if you weren't raised with any conditioning it seems more normal to love individuals, not categories.

                                        E This user is from outside of this forum
                                        E This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #51

                                        Are you from ancient Greece by any chance?

                                        R 1 Reply Last reply
                                        3
                                        • E [email protected]

                                          Are you from ancient Greece by any chance?

                                          R This user is from outside of this forum
                                          R This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #52

                                          Their comment didn't contain enough disdain for women.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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