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  3. Why is blocking so common nowadays?

Why is blocking so common nowadays?

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  • lennybird@lemmy.worldL [email protected]

    There may be an age or generational explanation for this, but I especially notice this behavior on Reddit while not nearly as much here on Lemmy (though maybe that's also a mater of implementation).

    It seems many are so quick to assert overly-confident positions, but then hit-and-run with some smarmy remark at even the slightest challenge, then quickly block. Like, not even crazy stuff. Just basic, civil disagreements. I can pretty well predict when it will happen, and it always feels like such a petty ego-sparing fingers-in-ears denial thing to do, and to me if anything shows they were not very confident in their views being challenged.

    I think I've only blocked a handful of people over a decade who were actively spamming, stalking, or spewing extremely hateful rhetoric and I just reported them simultaneously. You have to cross a pretty extreme and irrational line for me to do that.

    The reason I ask is to see if I'm missing something; to better understand the mindset of those who do.

    P This user is from outside of this forum
    P This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote last edited by
    #75

    It depends what you're on (social media) for.

    If you're there to get some positive social interaction and read some articles or funny pictures, it completely makes sense to block agitators or regular shitposters.

    If you're there to have political arguments and engage with rage bait then you leave everyone unblocked.

    Its really not that complicated.

    1 Reply Last reply
    6
    • N [email protected]

      Why are you subscribed to them? No need to block just curate.

      R This user is from outside of this forum
      R This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote last edited by
      #76

      they’re just clogging up my ALL feed with things I dont care about

      They aren't subscribed to them.

      N 1 Reply Last reply
      1
      • E [email protected]

        It's baffling how quick people are to do it. A while ago, I sold an old electronic thing on Marketplace to someone. A day later, they sent me an angry message saying that it didn't work and how I scammed them, then proceeded to block me. I would've liked the opportunity to troubleshoot with them or even refund the item if it turned out to actually be broken, but... blocking me precludes all that. What exactly did they hope to achieve?

        T This user is from outside of this forum
        T This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote last edited by [email protected]
        #77

        If you've previously had the experience of reaching out to someone politely in good faith about a problem with your purchase, and they really were a scammer and responded "haha get fucked loser" and blocked you, that's a mentally damaging interaction. You made yourself vulnerable and got taken advantage of. Not just once for buying from a scammer, but twice for then politely asking the scammer to help you! And that feels awful - as if the scammer "won", and you are a sucker who didn't even realise you'd been scammed.

        That is why people are quick to go on the offensive when they suspect they've been wronged, because they've been hurt before and want to try and claw back some small measure of pride by saying effectively "Okay you scammed me, but I'm not so stupid I don't see it, and I won't make myself vulnerable to you." - that's what the message and block you received really means, if you unpack it.

        I would be so much nicer if things weren't this way, and we could assume the best in people. With honest sellers such as yourself, it would even lead to the problem getting fixed! But there are a lot of scammers out there, so I understand the psychological "why", even if I don't like it and try to never behave that way myself.

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • lennybird@lemmy.worldL [email protected]

          There may be an age or generational explanation for this, but I especially notice this behavior on Reddit while not nearly as much here on Lemmy (though maybe that's also a mater of implementation).

          It seems many are so quick to assert overly-confident positions, but then hit-and-run with some smarmy remark at even the slightest challenge, then quickly block. Like, not even crazy stuff. Just basic, civil disagreements. I can pretty well predict when it will happen, and it always feels like such a petty ego-sparing fingers-in-ears denial thing to do, and to me if anything shows they were not very confident in their views being challenged.

          I think I've only blocked a handful of people over a decade who were actively spamming, stalking, or spewing extremely hateful rhetoric and I just reported them simultaneously. You have to cross a pretty extreme and irrational line for me to do that.

          The reason I ask is to see if I'm missing something; to better understand the mindset of those who do.

          S This user is from outside of this forum
          S This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote last edited by
          #78

          I've got better things to do than read a load of horseshit from bad-faith weirdos, so I block them. No point engaging with them and reading their opinions makes my day measurably worse.

          1 Reply Last reply
          8
          • S [email protected]

            Good answer, thank you!

            You'd be surprised though. These are the times I miss direct messages here. One of your estimates about me is wrong (factually, sadly) and the other is debatable, we might be close in age.

            I just took another route. I am still in the process of what more and what less to do, while having discovered I am likely an Autist, setting hard limits at some places.

            Ans yes, while there is much hate (currently seeming concentrated in the USA) people that open up often also have a lot of reason. Not defending anyones action here though.

            libb@piefed.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
            libb@piefed.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote last edited by
            #79

            You’d be surprised though. These are the times I miss direct messages here. One of your estimates about me is wrong (factually, sadly) and the other is debatable, we might be close in age.

            Sorry to hear that (not referring to your age 😉

            If you ever want to MP me the simplest way would be to check the blog (in my profile), on its contact page you will find an email

            I just took another route. I am still in the process of what more and what less to do, while having discovered I am likely an Autist, setting hard limits at some places.

            Limits are essentials. No matter how arbitrary they can be.

            Ans yes, while there is much hate (currently seeming concentrated in the USA) people that open up often also have a lot of reason.

            No doubt about that but spreading even more hate or anger is very unlikely to work as a remedy. It's difficult, there is no escaping that alas.

            S 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • lennybird@lemmy.worldL [email protected]

              There may be an age or generational explanation for this, but I especially notice this behavior on Reddit while not nearly as much here on Lemmy (though maybe that's also a mater of implementation).

              It seems many are so quick to assert overly-confident positions, but then hit-and-run with some smarmy remark at even the slightest challenge, then quickly block. Like, not even crazy stuff. Just basic, civil disagreements. I can pretty well predict when it will happen, and it always feels like such a petty ego-sparing fingers-in-ears denial thing to do, and to me if anything shows they were not very confident in their views being challenged.

              I think I've only blocked a handful of people over a decade who were actively spamming, stalking, or spewing extremely hateful rhetoric and I just reported them simultaneously. You have to cross a pretty extreme and irrational line for me to do that.

              The reason I ask is to see if I'm missing something; to better understand the mindset of those who do.

              hazelnutcookiez@lemmy.blahaj.zoneH This user is from outside of this forum
              hazelnutcookiez@lemmy.blahaj.zoneH This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote last edited by
              #80

              I'm 31 now but I've always been pretty quick with a block button, i don't mind people disagreeing with me, but some people are just overly aggressive and I find life's better to just not care about them and block.

              I also block trolls because you know don't feed the trolls.

              1 Reply Last reply
              4
              • lennybird@lemmy.worldL [email protected]

                There may be an age or generational explanation for this, but I especially notice this behavior on Reddit while not nearly as much here on Lemmy (though maybe that's also a mater of implementation).

                It seems many are so quick to assert overly-confident positions, but then hit-and-run with some smarmy remark at even the slightest challenge, then quickly block. Like, not even crazy stuff. Just basic, civil disagreements. I can pretty well predict when it will happen, and it always feels like such a petty ego-sparing fingers-in-ears denial thing to do, and to me if anything shows they were not very confident in their views being challenged.

                I think I've only blocked a handful of people over a decade who were actively spamming, stalking, or spewing extremely hateful rhetoric and I just reported them simultaneously. You have to cross a pretty extreme and irrational line for me to do that.

                The reason I ask is to see if I'm missing something; to better understand the mindset of those who do.

                M This user is from outside of this forum
                M This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote last edited by
                #81

                I'll try to be civil and will ask clarifying questions.

                However, as soon as I see someone both-sides-ing, I block them.
                Ain't got no time for their "can't we all just get along, kumbaya" centrist bullshit anymore.
                No we can't "just get along", the overton window has gone too far to the right for that.
                You have actual Nazis running shit now, or attempting to run things in other nations.

                We need to fight them, the time for "understanding" is over.

                1 Reply Last reply
                2
                • T [email protected]

                  I use user notes for this - notes like "argues in bad faith," "is knowledgeable about x," etc. Then if I feel talking to someone is a waste, I still get their input if I want it but know whether or not to engage.

                  M This user is from outside of this forum
                  M This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote last edited by
                  #82

                  I use multiple devices to browse the web. Those user notes don't carry over. So I just block people that argue in bad faith, those blocks do carry over, makes things easier for me to ignore, and prevents me from falling into the trap of debating those shitheads.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  1
                  • lennybird@lemmy.worldL [email protected]

                    There may be an age or generational explanation for this, but I especially notice this behavior on Reddit while not nearly as much here on Lemmy (though maybe that's also a mater of implementation).

                    It seems many are so quick to assert overly-confident positions, but then hit-and-run with some smarmy remark at even the slightest challenge, then quickly block. Like, not even crazy stuff. Just basic, civil disagreements. I can pretty well predict when it will happen, and it always feels like such a petty ego-sparing fingers-in-ears denial thing to do, and to me if anything shows they were not very confident in their views being challenged.

                    I think I've only blocked a handful of people over a decade who were actively spamming, stalking, or spewing extremely hateful rhetoric and I just reported them simultaneously. You have to cross a pretty extreme and irrational line for me to do that.

                    The reason I ask is to see if I'm missing something; to better understand the mindset of those who do.

                    hanrahan@slrpnk.netH This user is from outside of this forum
                    hanrahan@slrpnk.netH This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote last edited by [email protected]
                    #83

                    I've not blocked anyone here or on Reddit. I have on Mastodon but only becase the 3 people I have blocked are fucking interminably boring not because of any philsophival difference of opinion or they were rude or some shit.

                    I tend not to engage too much, it is some random on the internet after all. I am old, I've been doing this shit from IRL meetups of computer clubs, to BBS's where I actually personally knew just about everyone from meet ups, then Usenet and IRC opened the world, then fora, then reddit (because Usenet died) now here and Mastodon..

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    1
                    • R [email protected]

                      they’re just clogging up my ALL feed with things I dont care about

                      They aren't subscribed to them.

                      N This user is from outside of this forum
                      N This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote last edited by
                      #84

                      Yes, I am curious why anyone would want to look at ALL. Easier to just curate what you want and be done with it. Works better for Lemmy too since there is no algo.

                      R 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • N [email protected]

                        Yes, I am curious why anyone would want to look at ALL. Easier to just curate what you want and be done with it. Works better for Lemmy too since there is no algo.

                        R This user is from outside of this forum
                        R This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote last edited by [email protected]
                        #85

                        How would you discover new communities when only browsing your feed? And there is plenty of topics I'm not interested enough in to subscribe to but I might still want to see when a popular post there blows up.

                        I find it much easier to browser ALL and just block the communities I'm definitely not interested in.

                        N 1 Reply Last reply
                        1
                        • lennybird@lemmy.worldL [email protected]

                          There may be an age or generational explanation for this, but I especially notice this behavior on Reddit while not nearly as much here on Lemmy (though maybe that's also a mater of implementation).

                          It seems many are so quick to assert overly-confident positions, but then hit-and-run with some smarmy remark at even the slightest challenge, then quickly block. Like, not even crazy stuff. Just basic, civil disagreements. I can pretty well predict when it will happen, and it always feels like such a petty ego-sparing fingers-in-ears denial thing to do, and to me if anything shows they were not very confident in their views being challenged.

                          I think I've only blocked a handful of people over a decade who were actively spamming, stalking, or spewing extremely hateful rhetoric and I just reported them simultaneously. You have to cross a pretty extreme and irrational line for me to do that.

                          The reason I ask is to see if I'm missing something; to better understand the mindset of those who do.

                          O This user is from outside of this forum
                          O This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote last edited by
                          #86

                          People don't like being forced to engage with belligerent reactionaries.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          5
                          • E [email protected]

                            It's baffling how quick people are to do it. A while ago, I sold an old electronic thing on Marketplace to someone. A day later, they sent me an angry message saying that it didn't work and how I scammed them, then proceeded to block me. I would've liked the opportunity to troubleshoot with them or even refund the item if it turned out to actually be broken, but... blocking me precludes all that. What exactly did they hope to achieve?

                            lennybird@lemmy.worldL This user is from outside of this forum
                            lennybird@lemmy.worldL This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote last edited by
                            #87

                            Sounds like they wanted to angrily vent, but not also take accountability for what may be their own mistake. People are extremely poor at confrontation, and so often resort to these cheapshot hit-and-run tactics. They MUST have the last word, so they get their little dig in, then block very quickly. I just roll my eyes.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            1
                            • lennybird@lemmy.worldL [email protected]

                              There may be an age or generational explanation for this, but I especially notice this behavior on Reddit while not nearly as much here on Lemmy (though maybe that's also a mater of implementation).

                              It seems many are so quick to assert overly-confident positions, but then hit-and-run with some smarmy remark at even the slightest challenge, then quickly block. Like, not even crazy stuff. Just basic, civil disagreements. I can pretty well predict when it will happen, and it always feels like such a petty ego-sparing fingers-in-ears denial thing to do, and to me if anything shows they were not very confident in their views being challenged.

                              I think I've only blocked a handful of people over a decade who were actively spamming, stalking, or spewing extremely hateful rhetoric and I just reported them simultaneously. You have to cross a pretty extreme and irrational line for me to do that.

                              The reason I ask is to see if I'm missing something; to better understand the mindset of those who do.

                              F This user is from outside of this forum
                              F This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote last edited by
                              #88

                              It's how society is degenerating. Respect for each other is gone. The bullets have started to fly.

                              S 1 Reply Last reply
                              2
                              • lennybird@lemmy.worldL [email protected]

                                There may be an age or generational explanation for this, but I especially notice this behavior on Reddit while not nearly as much here on Lemmy (though maybe that's also a mater of implementation).

                                It seems many are so quick to assert overly-confident positions, but then hit-and-run with some smarmy remark at even the slightest challenge, then quickly block. Like, not even crazy stuff. Just basic, civil disagreements. I can pretty well predict when it will happen, and it always feels like such a petty ego-sparing fingers-in-ears denial thing to do, and to me if anything shows they were not very confident in their views being challenged.

                                I think I've only blocked a handful of people over a decade who were actively spamming, stalking, or spewing extremely hateful rhetoric and I just reported them simultaneously. You have to cross a pretty extreme and irrational line for me to do that.

                                The reason I ask is to see if I'm missing something; to better understand the mindset of those who do.

                                B This user is from outside of this forum
                                B This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote last edited by
                                #89

                                Trolls have no right to any of my time.

                                arararagi@ani.socialA 1 Reply Last reply
                                14
                                • lennybird@lemmy.worldL [email protected]

                                  There may be an age or generational explanation for this, but I especially notice this behavior on Reddit while not nearly as much here on Lemmy (though maybe that's also a mater of implementation).

                                  It seems many are so quick to assert overly-confident positions, but then hit-and-run with some smarmy remark at even the slightest challenge, then quickly block. Like, not even crazy stuff. Just basic, civil disagreements. I can pretty well predict when it will happen, and it always feels like such a petty ego-sparing fingers-in-ears denial thing to do, and to me if anything shows they were not very confident in their views being challenged.

                                  I think I've only blocked a handful of people over a decade who were actively spamming, stalking, or spewing extremely hateful rhetoric and I just reported them simultaneously. You have to cross a pretty extreme and irrational line for me to do that.

                                  The reason I ask is to see if I'm missing something; to better understand the mindset of those who do.

                                  B This user is from outside of this forum
                                  B This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #90

                                  I constantly block both users and communities on Lemmy. Mostly because they are spouting doomer nonsense, and I ain't got no time for their bullshit.

                                  D 1 Reply Last reply
                                  4
                                  • R [email protected]

                                    How would you discover new communities when only browsing your feed? And there is plenty of topics I'm not interested enough in to subscribe to but I might still want to see when a popular post there blows up.

                                    I find it much easier to browser ALL and just block the communities I'm definitely not interested in.

                                    N This user is from outside of this forum
                                    N This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote last edited by [email protected]
                                    #91

                                    How will you see anything interesting that "blows up" if you are blocking it?

                                    In any case: Lemmy is not reddit. So a lot of the subs I belong to would never show up in ALL. There is no algorithm to show me things based on my tastes or comments.

                                    Discovery is up to you.

                                    When I joined, I browsed communities, searched for topics I was interested in and once in a while revisit the list. I am truly using it like a forum aggregator. Links to other things and subs I am interested in often show up in the comments and that is the best discovery tool out side of browsing.

                                    By the way, switching to scaled helps pull in more of your subscriptions to the top even when they are smaller communities.

                                    R 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • N [email protected]

                                      How will you see anything interesting that "blows up" if you are blocking it?

                                      In any case: Lemmy is not reddit. So a lot of the subs I belong to would never show up in ALL. There is no algorithm to show me things based on my tastes or comments.

                                      Discovery is up to you.

                                      When I joined, I browsed communities, searched for topics I was interested in and once in a while revisit the list. I am truly using it like a forum aggregator. Links to other things and subs I am interested in often show up in the comments and that is the best discovery tool out side of browsing.

                                      By the way, switching to scaled helps pull in more of your subscriptions to the top even when they are smaller communities.

                                      R This user is from outside of this forum
                                      R This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #92

                                      How will you see anything interesting that “blows up” if you are blocking it?

                                      I'm not blocking them. I'm only blocking communities I'm definitely not interested in, for example AI art or video games I don't play.

                                      So a lot of the subs I belong to would never show up in all.

                                      I'm often browsing ALL ordered by "new" or "new comments" so with proper timing even the smallest communities will show up there. I've discovered plenty small ones like that.

                                      N 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • B [email protected]

                                        Trolls have no right to any of my time.

                                        arararagi@ani.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        arararagi@ani.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #93

                                        Someone disagreeing with you isn't a troll.

                                        B S 2 Replies Last reply
                                        4
                                        • arararagi@ani.socialA [email protected]

                                          Someone disagreeing with you isn't a troll.

                                          B This user is from outside of this forum
                                          B This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #94

                                          I've blocked like 2 people total, it's pretty clear when someone isn't arguing in good faith.

                                          Regardless, my point is the same. No one has a right to demand I read what they write.

                                          S 1 Reply Last reply
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