Christ the Redeemer vs. Christ the Knock Off Brand
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Prove to me this isn't a statue of Jonathan from Queer Eye
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Is Jesus wearing a bra?
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Is Jesus wearing a bra?
No, but he should be with jugs like those.
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Not far away we had what everyone called "Big Butter Jesus" or "Touchdown Jesus":
The "Big Butter" part comes from the region's fascination with making butter sculptures:
The "Touchdown" name, for those that don't know USA Football (Grid Iron), this is the same gesture the referee makes to signal a valid goal:
However, after being around for years, Touchdown Jesus is no more. I'm not making this up, it was struck by lightning and being made of fiberglass, burned to the ground.
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Not far away we had what everyone called "Big Butter Jesus" or "Touchdown Jesus":
The "Big Butter" part comes from the region's fascination with making butter sculptures:
The "Touchdown" name, for those that don't know USA Football (Grid Iron), this is the same gesture the referee makes to signal a valid goal:
However, after being around for years, Touchdown Jesus is no more. I'm not making this up, it was struck by lightning and being made of fiberglass, burned to the ground.
This was the context I never knew I needed, thank you.
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In Poland, we have this abomination:
https://nickt.pl/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/jezus-swiebodzin-raw-56.jpg
To make it worse, it stands looking upon a cheap supermarket and the sheet metal crown used to hide a cellphone tower. They removed it after they realized, that Jesus' head is being used to transmit porn.
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No, but he should be with jugs like those.
I'd be more religious if Jesus was a big tiddy goth 🥺
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Not far away we had what everyone called "Big Butter Jesus" or "Touchdown Jesus":
The "Big Butter" part comes from the region's fascination with making butter sculptures:
The "Touchdown" name, for those that don't know USA Football (Grid Iron), this is the same gesture the referee makes to signal a valid goal:
However, after being around for years, Touchdown Jesus is no more. I'm not making this up, it was struck by lightning and being made of fiberglass, burned to the ground.
I cannot articulate how perfect this synopsis is.
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No, but he should be with jugs like those.
No, this is supply-side Jesus, and he's barrel-chested because he wants to be like his idol, Melon Husk.
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This was the context I never knew I needed, thank you.
If the ending of my story was too abrupt, and you wanted to spend just a bit more time with Touchdown Jesus, here's the video a passerby caught of Touchdown Jesus burning. You can see the fire fighting vehicle on the left hand side, and the occasional flashes of lighting as the storm that started the fire rages on.
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Not far away we had what everyone called "Big Butter Jesus" or "Touchdown Jesus":
The "Big Butter" part comes from the region's fascination with making butter sculptures:
The "Touchdown" name, for those that don't know USA Football (Grid Iron), this is the same gesture the referee makes to signal a valid goal:
However, after being around for years, Touchdown Jesus is no more. I'm not making this up, it was struck by lightning and being made of fiberglass, burned to the ground.
Thought he was butter because he looks half melted
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In Poland, we have this abomination:
https://nickt.pl/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/jezus-swiebodzin-raw-56.jpg
To make it worse, it stands looking upon a cheap supermarket and the sheet metal crown used to hide a cellphone tower. They removed it after they realized, that Jesus' head is being used to transmit porn.
Jesus’ head is being used to transmit porn
I'll take 'sentences I never thought I'd read today'. please.
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In Poland, we have this abomination:
https://nickt.pl/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/jezus-swiebodzin-raw-56.jpg
To make it worse, it stands looking upon a cheap supermarket and the sheet metal crown used to hide a cellphone tower. They removed it after they realized, that Jesus' head is being used to transmit porn.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesus_Christ_the_King_of_the_Universe
It's not why they removed it but there was a wi-fi antenna in it at one point.
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We refuse to fund the statue, unless you include a subtle nod to hydrocephaly.
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Not far away we had what everyone called "Big Butter Jesus" or "Touchdown Jesus":
The "Big Butter" part comes from the region's fascination with making butter sculptures:
The "Touchdown" name, for those that don't know USA Football (Grid Iron), this is the same gesture the referee makes to signal a valid goal:
However, after being around for years, Touchdown Jesus is no more. I'm not making this up, it was struck by lightning and being made of fiberglass, burned to the ground.
That is absolutely glorious.
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You might say the bottom one is
jeSUS
Ill show myself out
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Not far away we had what everyone called "Big Butter Jesus" or "Touchdown Jesus":
The "Big Butter" part comes from the region's fascination with making butter sculptures:
The "Touchdown" name, for those that don't know USA Football (Grid Iron), this is the same gesture the referee makes to signal a valid goal:
However, after being around for years, Touchdown Jesus is no more. I'm not making this up, it was struck by lightning and being made of fiberglass, burned to the ground.
wrote on last edited by [email protected]Thanks you for giving me a good laugh.
