Excellent advice
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I'm on the side of not bullying folks for ultimately harmless things. When it comes to dating, it just wouldn't be my thing... but I'm a married man so that doesn't truly matter either, lol.
And yet you’re literally saying that someone liking a stuffed animal is a sign of arrested development. “I’m not bullying them but I am saying that they’re a little broken and don’t think they should be taken seriously” is so much more a showcase of your own deeply flawed character than theirs.
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And yet you’re literally saying that someone liking a stuffed animal is a sign of arrested development. “I’m not bullying them but I am saying that they’re a little broken and don’t think they should be taken seriously” is so much more a showcase of your own deeply flawed character than theirs.
wrote on last edited by [email protected]There's 'liking' like one likes video games and movies and jogging and whatnot, and there's being obsessed about something that shallow and consumerist. I'm obviously talking about the latter, and while it does say something about them (enough for me not to consider them as a partner for instance) it doesn't make them "bad people", not at all, so one should be gentle if they find themselves in a situation like visiting a romantic interest's home, finding 50 stuffed animals and deciding against continuing. Relax.
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There's 'liking' like one likes video games and movies and jogging and whatnot, and there's being obsessed about something that shallow and consumerist. I'm obviously talking about the latter, and while it does say something about them (enough for me not to consider them as a partner for instance) it doesn't make them "bad people", not at all, so one should be gentle if they find themselves in a situation like visiting a romantic interest's home, finding 50 stuffed animals and deciding against continuing. Relax.
No one was talking about 50 stuffed animals, not a soul. You just decided to bring it up for some unknown reason like anyone cares at all what you think about your little made-up scenario.
You’re not the person think you are, treating people like this and saying that your quieter tone of voice is superior while spouting these nonsense opinions and putting more unnecessary negative energy into the world for no other reason than stroking your own ego.
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No one was talking about 50 stuffed animals, not a soul. You just decided to bring it up for some unknown reason like anyone cares at all what you think about your little made-up scenario.
You’re not the person think you are, treating people like this and saying that your quieter tone of voice is superior while spouting these nonsense opinions and putting more unnecessary negative energy into the world for no other reason than stroking your own ego.
Take care, lady.
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62 year old guy.
I was given a bear when I was born. His name is Growl. I have never once been ashamed of him or hidden him away.
Much more recently (last 10 or 15 years) I was gifted a Build-a-bear Chewbacca. I will never hide him away either.
I love this!
I have a handful of stuffed animals, but my most prized ones are Teddy the bear that my pop-pop gave me at the hospital when I was born and a cat that my grandmother hand stitched, she made one for each of her grandchildren and mine is one of few that are still around. I’m 41 and I have also never been ashamed
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I would never hide my stuffed animals. I have exactly one, and it's a hedgehog I keep on my bookshelf. Not a Sonic-style hedgehog, a British hedgehog.
I will be keeping that hedgehog until I or someone in my family has kids, at which point I will pass it down to them.
How can you tell it's British?
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This but replace "stuffed animals" with "your friends." Nothing like someone coming along thinking they can somehow be the one to "fix" or "save" the homie and ends up separating them from longtime friends (and then they're still not happy and now we're all a little more lonely)
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How can you tell it's British?
You can tell because of the way it is.
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How can you tell it's British?
Probably because it stole spices and land
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Does this apply to my Funko Rogues Gallery?
Eeeehhhh, I'd silently judge anyone with a Funko collection. 2 or 3 would still be fine
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To each their own. I don't think I could take someone seriously if they were too attached to toys and dolls as it is, for me, an obvious sign of an arrested development. But that doesn't mean I should ridicule them, nor that others wouldn't be right for them (or that they're immoral people either, of course, which is what truly matters in the end); the world is big enough for both of us, and for your toys too!
Two things.
First, dating and commitment is about matching and compatibility, not about some kind of objective ranking system of quality or merit. It's about how a partner or potential partner rates on your own personal scale, not some sort of societal scale built by social consensus. So while it is ok for you to find a particular trait to be a negative, or even a deal breaker, your point is completely irrelevant to the advice being given, which is not to hide important traits of one's identity.
Second, your own preference here is stated in unnecessarily condescending terms, as if your preferences are right and the opposite preference is wrong or the sign of some kind of disorder. Whatever your definition of "toys and dolls" are, it probably isn't a very tightly defined term, and I'd venture to guess that you are OK with some kinds of "toys" but not others. People collect stuff. People develop emotional attachment to physical things all the time. And for you to gatekeep and say which things are acceptable or unacceptable is kinda an asshole move.
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To each their own. I don't think I could take someone seriously if they were too attached to toys and dolls as it is, for me, an obvious sign of an arrested development. But that doesn't mean I should ridicule them, nor that others wouldn't be right for them (or that they're immoral people either, of course, which is what truly matters in the end); the world is big enough for both of us, and for your toys too!
The problem isn't the toys and dolls, but being overly attached, which can happen to any material possession, even "adult things" like cars or clothes.
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To each their own. I don't think I could take someone seriously if they were too attached to toys and dolls as it is, for me, an obvious sign of an arrested development. But that doesn't mean I should ridicule them, nor that others wouldn't be right for them (or that they're immoral people either, of course, which is what truly matters in the end); the world is big enough for both of us, and for your toys too!
I know you think you're coming off as magnanimous, but it's got the same energy as "I've got a lot of gay friends actually" energy.
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To each their own. I don't think I could take someone seriously if they were too attached to toys and dolls as it is, for me, an obvious sign of an arrested development. But that doesn't mean I should ridicule them, nor that others wouldn't be right for them (or that they're immoral people either, of course, which is what truly matters in the end); the world is big enough for both of us, and for your toys too!
I'm really not sure why you're being downvoted. Your comment was polite, contributed to the discussion, and was made in good faith.
I'm on the other end. I don't think keeping a stuffed animal matters really. I have a functionally useless old timer pocket knife from when I was a kid and I just kept it for sentimental/memory value.
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I know you think you're coming off as magnanimous, but it's got the same energy as "I've got a lot of gay friends actually" energy.
I don't, but I do have a gay uncle.
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The problem isn't the toys and dolls, but being overly attached, which can happen to any material possession, even "adult things" like cars or clothes.
100%. Anything that can just be bought and seen but has no depth is definitely on the top of the list. At least if you're into cars but talk to me about engines and technical evolution, or you're into animals but fr and know classifications and curious facts about otters, like, even if I'm not interested at all I can't help but respect a bit. It's a passion with depth, an obsession I could never have but that shows you appreciate the less superficial and consumerist parts of the world. I'd have the same opinion about someone who has a massive collection of Bionicles (I get it, they were cool AF but there's a time and place for everything...) in full display in the living room, or worse, anime bodypillows, lol.
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Two things.
First, dating and commitment is about matching and compatibility, not about some kind of objective ranking system of quality or merit. It's about how a partner or potential partner rates on your own personal scale, not some sort of societal scale built by social consensus. So while it is ok for you to find a particular trait to be a negative, or even a deal breaker, your point is completely irrelevant to the advice being given, which is not to hide important traits of one's identity.
Second, your own preference here is stated in unnecessarily condescending terms, as if your preferences are right and the opposite preference is wrong or the sign of some kind of disorder. Whatever your definition of "toys and dolls" are, it probably isn't a very tightly defined term, and I'd venture to guess that you are OK with some kinds of "toys" but not others. People collect stuff. People develop emotional attachment to physical things all the time. And for you to gatekeep and say which things are acceptable or unacceptable is kinda an asshole move.
I'm taking a somewhat oppositional position to OP! I'm not gatekeeping anything, just expanding on the topic. And no, I personally have never collected anything nor do I particularly care for decoration, and I find being attached to material possessions to that extent says something not necessarily dangerous or immoral about you, but it does still. So, while being obsessed with toys is not at the core of any ideological or personality-dependent negative attribute (nor does it constitute one by itself), it does serve as a litmus test for whether the person is, you know, 'regular'. Come on, you go to a guy's house and he has nothing but Goku and Vegeta inflatable dolls and refuses to take off the Piccolo doorag in his 30s and you're not gonna think he might be a tad infantile and focused on less than important things?
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Probably because it stole spices and land
This is Netherlands erasure
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How can you tell it's British?
I have a small figurine of an Irishman and I'm fairly sure the hedgehog is bullying it.
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I have a small figurine of an Irishman and I'm fairly sure the hedgehog is bullying it.
Fair enough.
