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  3. The best thing you can do for the fediverse is just be kind

The best thing you can do for the fediverse is just be kind

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  • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

    This is a whole different train of thought (mine is, I won't speak for yours) and I don't wanna derail my original thought but that's a thing I've been thinking about a lot lately.

    I agree with you, and subscribe to the idea of tolerance as a social contract that, once broken, is no longer owed to the one who broke the contract.

    At the same time, I've also learned that very explicitly, feeling persecuted is a requisite ingredient in radicalizing people into hate groups. And that at an individual scale, it's generally undeserved compassion that helps deradicalize them. We know this from the accounts of people who managed to leave hate groups- a little while ago there was really good (and long) interview with someone who used to be leader of a white nationalist group where he talked a fair bit about that idea, since he now works with a nonprofit that helps families and friends support and deradicalize loved ones, but it's far from the only account

    At present I'm really not sure how I personally reconcile those two things I belive to be true. The Nazi bar analogy is real.

    I know wading into this more specific conversion runs the risk of immediately derailing what I was trying to start a discussion about, but I figured I'd share my thoughts. If anyone reads this and has thoughts to share (though I'd prefer not to get 50 comments just saying I suck for having complicated views on what we do about the predicament the US and world is in with the rise of fascist ideology. I'm interested in what's effective in terms of fixing the problem just like you are) I'd be interested in hearing them. I'm still looking for a way to synthesize my beliefs into a coherent whole.

    ? Offline
    ? Offline
    Guest
    wrote on last edited by
    #54

    they're going to "feel" persecuted, no matter what. might as well make them actually fucking fear it.

    1 Reply Last reply
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    • match@pawb.socialM [email protected]

      the second best thing you can do is o
      make nsfw posts

      cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
      cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote on last edited by
      #55

      Lol. Porn does make the internet go round

      I already did that, but not on this account >.>

      tourist@lemmy.worldT stroz@infosec.pubS ? gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.deG 4 Replies Last reply
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      • coelacanth@feddit.nuC [email protected]

        If this is the best thing you can do, then the second best thing is be active. We're still content starved around here. If you think of something to post, post it. If you can't post, try to comment. Especially on any post that has no comments. Doesn't matter how banal your comment is. Nothing scares away potential new users more than seeing post after post with 0 comments in their feed, and nothing disheartens posters more than that "0 comments" under their post.

        People are generally scared or reluctant to do things when nobody else is doing them. They don't want to post in communities that don't already have recent posts. They don't want to comment on posts that have 0 comments. So whenever you can break that silence and be that first post or comment, try to do so.

        cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
        cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #56

        I definitely agree about the importance of breaking the silence, and engaging with folks who go out of their way to post.

        As a culture we want that to be rewarding, it's something we all appreciate when folks do, so I think it's worth making sure posters can feel that it's appreciated. Make it known 🙂

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • F [email protected]

          Instructions unclear. Here is your personal info:

          Name: Christopher "Chris" Alan Whitmore
          Date of Birth: July 12, 1993
          Age: 31
          Gender: Male
          Address: 4279 Elmridge Avenue, Boulder, CO 80301
          Phone Number: (720) 555-3942
          Email: [email protected]
          Alternate Email: [email protected]
          Social Media:

          Instagram: @chris.the.moose

          IP Address: 73.164.202.147
          ISP: Xfinity by Comcast
          Router Name: WhitNet_5G
          Router Password: MooseTracks2020!


          Education:

          Fairview High School, Boulder, CO (Graduated 2011)

          University of Colorado Boulder – B.S. in Computer Science (Graduated 2015)


          Employment:

          2016–2019: IT Support Specialist at Techfinity Solutions

          2019–Present: Systems Analyst at VantaByte Technologies, Boulder, CO


          Known Devices:

          MacBook Pro (M1, 2020) – Chris’s-MBP.local

          iPhone 13 – Chrissy’s iPhone

          iPad Air – MoosePad


          Gaming Handles:

          Steam: WhitMoose93

          Discord: MooseMan#4491

          Xbox Live: WhitByte93


          Observations:

          Favorite coffee order: Iced caramel macchiato, oat milk

          Has a rescue husky named “Niko”

          Drives a black 2018 Subaru Outback with a "Hack the Planet" bumper sticker

          Frequently shops at: Micro Center, REI, Whole Foods

          Sure! Here's an expanded version of the fictional profile for Chris Whitmore, now including made-up family member names, relationships, and contact info — all entirely fictional and consistent with the character:


          Family Members:

          1. Mother
            Name: Diane Marie Whitmore (née Larkin)
            Age: 58
            Occupation: High School English Teacher (Retired)
            Location: Fort Collins, CO
            Phone: (970) 555-1837
            Email: [email protected]

          2. Father
            Name: Alan David Whitmore
            Age: 61
            Occupation: Mechanical Engineer at Apex Industrial (Semi-retired)
            Location: Fort Collins, CO
            Phone: (970) 555-1836
            Email: [email protected]

          3. Sister
            Name: Emily Paige Whitmore
            Age: 27
            Occupation: Graduate Student, Psychology, University of Oregon
            Location: Eugene, OR
            Phone: (541) 555-2249
            Email: [email protected]
            Instagram: @empaige_

          4. Uncle
            Name: Gerald “Jerry” Larkin
            Age: 55
            Occupation: Owner of Larkin’s Auto & Tire
            Location: Longmont, CO
            Phone: (303) 555-7993
            Email: [email protected]


          I have successfully sent 132 death threats in total to you and your family members.

          ::: spoiler disclaimer
          please mods this whole thing is a joke
          :::

          M This user is from outside of this forum
          M This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by
          #57

          Sure! Here’s an expanded version of the fictional profile for Chris Whitmore, now including made-up family member names, relationships, and contact info — all entirely fictional and consistent with the character:

          You forgot to remove that part of the LLM response....

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

            The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.

            On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-

            • Be kind

            • Ask people what they think, and why

            • Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility

            • Engage sincerely

            • Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say

            • Make this small space worth being in

            A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.

            Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

            The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.

            facedeer@fedia.ioF This user is from outside of this forum
            facedeer@fedia.ioF This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote on last edited by
            #58

            One thing that has been concerning me lately is that the Fediverse is being treated as a refuge for people who get banned on Reddit or other social media. Sure, sometimes those bans are based on arbitrary power tripping nonsense. But people actually do get banned for being assholes, and so I've got some worry that this is distilling the population of the Fediverse in an unfortunate direction.

            cris_color@lemmy.worldC 1 Reply Last reply
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            • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

              Thank you very much, I do my best 🙂

              By the way I love your username lol. Take care!

              gradually_adjusting@lemmy.worldG This user is from outside of this forum
              gradually_adjusting@lemmy.worldG This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote on last edited by
              #59

              cris_color@lemmy.worldC 1 Reply Last reply
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              • facedeer@fedia.ioF [email protected]

                One thing that has been concerning me lately is that the Fediverse is being treated as a refuge for people who get banned on Reddit or other social media. Sure, sometimes those bans are based on arbitrary power tripping nonsense. But people actually do get banned for being assholes, and so I've got some worry that this is distilling the population of the Fediverse in an unfortunate direction.

                cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #60

                Yeah, I think that was a big issue with the culture of platforms like Voat.

                The fediverse doesn't have it as bad but it's still definitely a risk. And being decentralized makes it easier to dodge bans and whatnot.

                You're right, and like I said elsewhere in this thread, big corporate platforms definitely have issues but that doesn't mean there aren't any unique challenges the fediverse will have to contend with.

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • coelacanth@feddit.nuC [email protected]

                  60 years ago? Buddy, I have some bad news for you...

                  R This user is from outside of this forum
                  R This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #61

                  Wdym financial cashes, pandemic, doomscrolling, Trump got the presidency twice??

                  You're talking crazy it's only 2005 bro, futuristic computer interface means frutiger aero, I listen to music on my iPod and text on my candybar flip phone </3</3

                  coelacanth@feddit.nuC 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • B [email protected]

                    One thing that's turning me off, is the, uh... political requirements of much of the space.

                    By that I mean stuff like "Elon Musk should commit suicide" or "X group of people are all mentally retarded" comments in top posts, or even popular posts themselves.

                    It feels toxic like X. Or what Voat (an older Reddit clone, albeit not a federated one) turned into, albeit at the opposite side of the political spectrum, hence no one contributed to non-political niches and the site died in toxicity.

                    E This user is from outside of this forum
                    E This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #62

                    It may not do much depending on the mods/admins, but it never hurts to report and downvote comments or posts like that.

                    Emphasis on reporting there, as I think sometimes that stuff lingers around because people have made a habit of only downvoting and blocking those doing that regularly. I realize in your examples it's more likely bias or bigotry respectively, but still.

                    Report first, then downvote and block. Doing only the latter only makes your experience a little better, the former may help the community.

                    B 1 Reply Last reply
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                    • gradually_adjusting@lemmy.worldG [email protected]

                      cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                      cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #63

                      Thats absolutely horrifying, thank you. 😂

                      1 Reply Last reply
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                      • E [email protected]

                        It may not do much depending on the mods/admins, but it never hurts to report and downvote comments or posts like that.

                        Emphasis on reporting there, as I think sometimes that stuff lingers around because people have made a habit of only downvoting and blocking those doing that regularly. I realize in your examples it's more likely bias or bigotry respectively, but still.

                        Report first, then downvote and block. Doing only the latter only makes your experience a little better, the former may help the community.

                        B This user is from outside of this forum
                        B This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #64

                        I do report them, but some communities seem to encourage it and leave it up.

                        1 Reply Last reply
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                        • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

                          I can definitely understand that. I think in a lot of ways that problem is driven by how much of a political echo chamber lemmy is. Any time there's a narower range of beliefs I feel like you can see those beliefs getting more extreme, or expressed in more extreme and toxic ways.

                          I honestly don't really know how to improve it given the state of the world. It feels like the range of political beliefs keeps getting compressed into two groups and it makes it harder and harder to tolerate the beliefs of those further from yourself. And for valid reasons.

                          And the more justified the contempt for people of other political views gets the harder it gets to figure out how, culturally, we manage the justified anger that comes from how deeply broken everything is.

                          Elon musk is doing actual literal Nazi salutes and peoples anger about that is justified. And at the same time I'm not sure what way of acting on that anger (and acting on the problem) yields anything other than radializing people teetering on the edge of extremism.

                          I'm glad I don't really see actual Nazis on lemmy. Its nice that there's less debate about the legitimacy of people's humanity.

                          And at the same time anger is deeply toxic to healthy interaction and drives behaviors that I genuinely don't think make the problems prompting people's anger any better.

                          B This user is from outside of this forum
                          B This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #65

                          Yeah don't get me wrong, I love Lemmy. But I don't like, well, that sort of thing. Or straight up disinformation being posted along the lines of that vitriol. It makes me worry about the Fediverse, as that culture only goes one place.

                          S 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

                            The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.

                            On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-

                            • Be kind

                            • Ask people what they think, and why

                            • Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility

                            • Engage sincerely

                            • Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say

                            • Make this small space worth being in

                            A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.

                            Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

                            The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.

                            blaze@lemmy.dbzer0.comB This user is from outside of this forum
                            blaze@lemmy.dbzer0.comB This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #66

                            Great post, as usual. Thank you for this!

                            cris_color@lemmy.worldC 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • rikudou@lemmings.worldR This user is from outside of this forum
                              rikudou@lemmings.worldR This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #67

                              Every troll server gets defederated from by everyone. And every troll gets banned on the normal servers. I think the federated nature is a blessing, those assholes have their own part of the internet which is usually far from my part of the internet.

                              facedeer@fedia.ioF 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • blaze@lemmy.dbzer0.comB [email protected]

                                Great post, as usual. Thank you for this!

                                cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                                cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #68

                                Thank you! ❤️

                                1 Reply Last reply
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                                • R [email protected]

                                  Wdym financial cashes, pandemic, doomscrolling, Trump got the presidency twice??

                                  You're talking crazy it's only 2005 bro, futuristic computer interface means frutiger aero, I listen to music on my iPod and text on my candybar flip phone </3</3

                                  coelacanth@feddit.nuC This user is from outside of this forum
                                  coelacanth@feddit.nuC This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #69

                                  Don't worry, at least 2005 was only ten years ago.

                                  ...wait.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • ogmios@sh.itjust.worksO [email protected]

                                    If you actually had a coherent definition of what a Nazi is, it might be possible to agree with you. But in reality, it's used as a catch all by shitty people to justify their shitty behaviour.

                                    ? Offline
                                    ? Offline
                                    Guest
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #70

                                    No its not. Just because you can't understand that shipping people to labour camps makes you a nazi or supporting someone who does also makes you a nazi doesn't mean other people have that issue.

                                    ogmios@sh.itjust.worksO 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

                                      The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.

                                      On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-

                                      • Be kind

                                      • Ask people what they think, and why

                                      • Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility

                                      • Engage sincerely

                                      • Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say

                                      • Make this small space worth being in

                                      A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.

                                      Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

                                      The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.

                                      K This user is from outside of this forum
                                      K This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #71

                                      Great post.

                                      To add to this, not resorting to calling others tankies or Russian bots when you have differing opinions, especially around politics.

                                      cris_color@lemmy.worldC D N ? S 7 Replies Last reply
                                      0
                                      • rikudou@lemmings.worldR [email protected]

                                        Every troll server gets defederated from by everyone. And every troll gets banned on the normal servers. I think the federated nature is a blessing, those assholes have their own part of the internet which is usually far from my part of the internet.

                                        facedeer@fedia.ioF This user is from outside of this forum
                                        facedeer@fedia.ioF This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #72

                                        "Asshole" is a broad term. It includes racists, abrasive personalities, anger-management problems, and so forth. Ie, people who have a tendency to get banned from other places. It's not just trolls.

                                        Being banned from Reddit is a unitary action. They can't get back into Reddit, they're just gone. Whereas in the Fediverse you can just go to a different instance and sign up afresh each time you get banned. This is part of the Fediverse's design. And so I am concerned that the Fediverse will accumulate the worst users.

                                        gamermanh@lemmy.dbzer0.comG 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

                                          The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.

                                          On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-

                                          • Be kind

                                          • Ask people what they think, and why

                                          • Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility

                                          • Engage sincerely

                                          • Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say

                                          • Make this small space worth being in

                                          A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.

                                          Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

                                          The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.

                                          F This user is from outside of this forum
                                          F This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #73

                                          I notice tons and tons of hostility in comments. And I think it's from people jumping to the worst possible conclusion.

                                          S cris_color@lemmy.worldC 2 Replies Last reply
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