The best thing you can do for the fediverse is just be kind
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The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.
On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-
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Be kind
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Ask people what they think, and why
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Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility
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Engage sincerely
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Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say
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Make this small space worth being in
A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.
Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.
The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.
I started using Lemmy just recently. I haven't seen any sexism here so far. On reddit it's a matter of minutes until something sexist appears on my feed, or other hateful stuff. That's why I feel way more relaxed using Lemmy.
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Also try to post stuff. I need to follow my own advice more.
And not just memes and shitposts you find elsewhere
Make things and share
It ain't gonna be perfect but that's half the fun
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The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.
On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-
-
Be kind
-
Ask people what they think, and why
-
Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility
-
Engage sincerely
-
Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say
-
Make this small space worth being in
A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.
Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.
The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.
I have a couple of suggestions to add:
I was considering leaving the other site before the API fiasco because it felt like so many users approach engagement as rhetorical combat, that is, one commenter will win and one will lose. Instead, think one of Covey's habits of highly-effective people: "Win-win, or no deal." Approach discussion on the Fediverse as a collaborative act, in which you're exchanging ideas with another person. Even if you disagree, you can both win by respectfully hearing it out the other person. And if the other person won't collaborate? No deal! Just disengage.
Just like in intimate relationship, use "I" statements instead of "you" statements. Telling people who they are and what they believe is not only disrespectful, but probably wrong, often exaggerated or distorted for rhetorical combat purposes. People get angry when their identity gets poked at. One exception, of course, is when giving advice, like, stick to what you know, and share your thoughts and your reactions to a topic.
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It did not impact this thread at all before this comment which was my point exactly.
I definitely saw several comments that strike me as political, which is exactly my point, everyone has a different definition.
When every aspect of your life is affected by politics, everything is political.
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The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.
On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-
-
Be kind
-
Ask people what they think, and why
-
Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility
-
Engage sincerely
-
Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say
-
Make this small space worth being in
A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.
Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.
The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.
Sounds more like a Showerthought, but I'm going to allow it.
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Great post.
To add to this, not resorting to calling others tankies or Russian bots when you have differing opinions, especially around politics.
I came to Lemmy (lemm.ee originally) with this attitude. Tankies really made me regret trying to be sympathetic too them. It was the most vile interaction I've had on the Internet maybe? You shouldn't call people tankies if they're not but real tankies are by far the biggest problem with the fediverse and it's growth
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Lemmy has a well-known reputation as being a "Nazi bar". e.g. as mentioned in this example post in r/RedditAlternatives complaining about toxicity on Lemmy, here is one of the comments therein (not from OP but as part of the overall conversation):
If their experience is anything like mine, it’s populated by mostly far left wing Americans who were banned from Reddit for being too extreme. I disagreed with someone about a topical left wing American position and received death threats. In fact I’ve never received that many death threats on Reddit. Lemmy is extreme.
Even if the threats came from Hexbear or one of the lemmy.ml mods who are allowed to make death threats against users without any repercussions, "we" still expose "our" users to such content when we federate with those communities. i.e., for exactly the same reason that we defederate from instances that share CSAM, if we really, truly, genuinely don't like it when mods make death threats against users, then we need to put a stop to it - by defederating those instances that are known to do exactly that.
Otherwise we give our tacit approval, and moreover whenever we encourage people to join Lemmy instances, we willingly expose those people to this kind of content. Would you expose someone to CSAM, knowingly and without warning them first? Then why is it different when we can see the death threats, delivered by mods, who are not censured in any way, yet still encourage people to come here to Lemmy communities? Are we truly that desperate for content that we are so inconsiderate to them as to expose them to that without warning?
If you somehow have not heard of this yet and really don't know what I'm talking about, a lot of details are offered in Discuss.Online's (successful) Petition to defederate from hexbear.net, although that particular mod in question is from Lemmy.ml.
I had pretty much the same experience as that user and it's why I left lemm.ee when they decided not to defederate with some of the worst instances. Was about to go back to the search if lemmy.world wasn't any better. Tankies are why I don't recommend Lemmy to my friends anymore. They are the fediverse's biggest problem
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I definitely saw several comments that strike me as political, which is exactly my point, everyone has a different definition.
When every aspect of your life is affected by politics, everything is political.
There are now, this one was the first.
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Lol. Porn does make the internet go round
I already did that, but not on this account >.>
Multiple accounts are a must!
...or so I've been told
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I had pretty much the same experience as that user and it's why I left lemm.ee when they decided not to defederate with some of the worst instances. Was about to go back to the search if lemmy.world wasn't any better. Tankies are why I don't recommend Lemmy to my friends anymore. They are the fediverse's biggest problem
I am currently at 100% of the people that I've told about Lemmy irl actively chiding me for having mentioned it to them. It doesn't help that (1) Lemmy.ml is the #1 Lemmy instance in a Google search, and (2) that instance uses Local rather than All when you don't have an account. If someone told me to consider joining Lemmy.ml, and that first couple of pages of content were all that I saw - especially just before any election in a Western nation - well then now I understand their reaction perfectly, as it is the correct one!?!?
Conversely, PieFed has a number of features that Lemmy lacks, one being the ability to actually block all users from an instance (rather than merely mute communities but not actual users on it - leaving them free to troll you in other communities, reply to your comments, trigger notifications, downvote your content, etc.). Since blocking lemmy.ml, I have had zero regrets, and enjoy interacting with Lemmy communities much better:-).
The real biggest problem that Lemmy has is lack of users and overall dearth of niche content - which ofc wraps back around to why would someone willing come here to be bullied just for being a mainstream centrist or even "leftist" by USA standards (Reddit is based in and its largest userbase is from the USA)?
Bullying is why Lemmy will never grow. That, and how the tools are somehow even more authoritian than Reddit - i.e. there is a modlog but no modmail, nor notification of a moderation event, instead the modlog simply says that a "mod" did something, if you go to the trouble to find out why nobody bothered to respond. And worse, on Lemmy.ml you'll find yourself banned from communities that you've never so much as heard of, citing having broken a rule that seems not written down anywhere. The lack of transparency is very reminiscent of the spez.
Fortunately, PieFed and Mbin offer non-Lemmy options to the Threadiverse.:-)
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Aka the compliment sandwich. A technique I personally dislike. Be honest and open with your feedback in a positive way, don't try to hide it between compliments.
100% agreed. If I see a compliment sandwich, I assume that the person using the technique is lying about the compliments and I lose all respect for them.
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Lol. Porn does make the internet go round
I already did that, but not on this account >.>
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"Asshole" is a broad term. It includes racists, abrasive personalities, anger-management problems, and so forth. Ie, people who have a tendency to get banned from other places. It's not just trolls.
Being banned from Reddit is a unitary action. They can't get back into Reddit, they're just gone. Whereas in the Fediverse you can just go to a different instance and sign up afresh each time you get banned. This is part of the Fediverse's design. And so I am concerned that the Fediverse will accumulate the worst users.
They can't get back into Reddit, they're just gone
It takes all of 30s to spin up a new Reddit account, just has to have a new name that isn't already taken. If anything it's easier than on a lot of Lemmy instances
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In fairness reddit also has volunteer moderation, but you're absolutely right. I think that's why being intentional about what kind of culture we want is so important.
In a small space bad actors in leadership roles can do so much damage, and people intentionally facilitating healthy spaces can do so much good.
Corporate platforms have to deal with profit incentives and the way those warp what a space is about, but we shouldn't forget that our "new" fediverse model has its own problems well have to contend with.
The issue of greater variation in moderator/hosts was a big issue in the forum days to my understanding, and whether a space was healthy varried a lot from one to another. Big consolidated platforms homogenized things a lot but that came with its own issues. In a lot of ways it feels like the fediverse will have to address a lot of the unresolved issues of the old internet.
I can only hope we can learn by looking back at that history and build something better now
Well, I certainly do appreciate seeing people like yourself making an active effort to bring some sanity back to the web. Keep it up!
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I've noticed most discussions i have here end with a LOT less anger and a LOT more learning and that makes me happy.
Because there's fewer foreign bots trying to make you hate everyone in your country, and fewer social media engagement bots trying to make sure you stay online arguing with someone.
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No its not. Just because you can't understand that shipping people to labour camps makes you a nazi or supporting someone who does also makes you a nazi doesn't mean other people have that issue.
That's what you say today because you think it's convenient to your argument, but it actually shows exactly what I'm talking about because the definition you've offered would make no sense at all to anyone a year ago, but people like you were still calling everyone Nazis then.
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There are now, this one was the first.
Aight dude
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Yeah don't get me wrong, I love Lemmy. But I don't like, well, that sort of thing. Or straight up disinformation being posted along the lines of that vitriol. It makes me worry about the Fediverse, as that culture only goes one place.
Great comment
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I can co-sign this if we can agree that some types of ‘disagreements’ don’t belong on the fediverse, a la the Nazi bar problem.
Please do tell how to increase the purity tests
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Great post.
To add to this, not resorting to calling others tankies or Russian bots when you have differing opinions, especially around politics.
My biggest worry on Lemmy is actually bots and Russian psy ops though. If centralized reddit couldn’t stop them before misinformation spread, how is Lemmy supposed to?
