Let's play this game again
-
Idk friends, I'm tired. Person who replies, please give me something cool.
You get perfectly controllable, exact, and safe teleportation, even if you’ve never been to the place you want to teleport to, you can also teleport others with you, but you start menstruating really bad every time, doesn’t matter if you have the usual equipment. No matter who you are, and it also applies to anyone teleporting with you, you will find yourself in the middle of intense menstruation.
-
I am ironman
Crippling alcoholism.
-
impeccable social skills
When interacting with pedophiles.
It would make for a great pedo radar, though.
-
Real life Ctrl+Z
But it's an Apple keyboard.
-
Shoot butts out my laser
Big, sexy, irresistible butts. Perfect asses. Round and bouncy. Butts that give you a reason to live. The kind you wanna eat like groceries… Sorry, what were we talking about?
-
You're still perfectly visible in shadows and reflections. Anyone who catches you in a mirror will see you completely naked.
Ambient light occlusion counts too, the area covered by your feet looks perfectly black.
Edit: You can create this scenario pretty easily in Blender. Here's what it might look like:
That kind of makes it cooler. That would be fucking terrifying, I’d be making SOOOO many people believe in ghosts that can punch you in the face if I had this set up.
-
I will keep my socks on and just when I’m about to bust, socks come off and I scare the girl.
I like to call it “The Haunted Rodeo.”
-
You get perfectly controllable, exact, and safe teleportation, even if you’ve never been to the place you want to teleport to, you can also teleport others with you, but you start menstruating really bad every time, doesn’t matter if you have the usual equipment. No matter who you are, and it also applies to anyone teleporting with you, you will find yourself in the middle of intense menstruation.
You win the game
-
infinite money
It’s only ever in Krone, any money that you interact with or that is legally in your possession or control is immediately and universally recognized and physically changes to the equivalent amount in Norwegian Krone and is only usable in areas that accept it as currency.
-
ability to make people say/do what you want them to
You never experience true trust and understanding ever again and you will never see the genuine version of anyone you interact with, only the mentally enslaved shells of people.
-
I can now shoot fresh spaghetti from my fingertips. Each fingertip shoots a continuous spaghetti noodle at an alarming rate with a range of about 4 feet. My thumbs will shoot a delicious meat sauce at a comparable rate and range.
You don’t like pasta or pasta sauce, it repulses you.
-
When a lemmy user responds to me with a side effect, I can, by choice, reflect or absorb said side effect
Your farts smell good, like really good, but only to you.
-
Ability to make cheese at will.
Severe lactose intolerance.
-
The ability to get my DnD group to have a sensible, routine schedule, with no cancelations.
Even for a post like this that’s just unrealistic.
But, everyone shows up but their fingers are constantly covered in a thick layer of Cheeto dust.
-
being happy
I don't need superpowers, just let me not be depressed while retaining a functioning cock/not feeling numb to the world.
Alright, fun's over, let the monkey's paw curl.
You experience no such thing as want or discomfort, you dehydrate and die within a few days.
-
Mind reading
Always. You can never not be reading the minds of everyone around you.
-
I can shit at will
You have a constant, dire, and unending desire to shit at all times.
-
The ability to turn lead into gold just by touching it and saying a short incantation.
The incantation is the full unedited script of The Bee Movie and you have to do a Seinfeld impersonation when reciting his lines.
-
Just gimme photographic memory.
You walked in on your mom getting railed by the mailman while your dad was masturbating in his cuck chair, the lighting was immaculate.
-
Super speed of course!!
You are still vulnerable to friction.
