Skip to content
Brand Logo

agnos.is Forums
  1. Home
  2. Lemmy Shitpost

Lemmy Shitpost

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!

Rules:

1. Be Respectful

___ Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion. Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here. …

2. No Illegal Content

___ Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required. That means: -No promoting violence/threats against any individuals -No CSA content or Revenge Porn -No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing) …

3. No Spam

___ Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules. -If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community. -Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community. -No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers -No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community. …

4. No Porn/Explicit

Content ___ -Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content. -Do not post Gore or Shock Content. …

5. No Enciting Harassment,

Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts ___ -Do not Brigade other Communities -No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy. -No Witch Hunts against users/communities. -No content that harasses members within or outside of the community. …

6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

___ -Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags. -Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

…

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.

Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)

Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

2.9k Topics 50.7k Posts
  • R

    she told me i couldn't eat a 5th box of samoas girl scout cookies today

    lemmyshitpost
    5
    1
    0 Votes
    5 Posts
    0 Views
    ?
    Thank you, every time I see this in my replies, I get a laugh
  • E

    muinatiT

    element
    1
    1
    0 Votes
    1 Posts
    0 Views
    No one has replied
  • E

    I can fix her

    38
    1
    333 Votes
    38 Posts
    0 Views
    G
    Oh, yeah definitely. My first love had BDP and I'm still riding scars from those 5 years. Best head tho.
  • marighost@piefed.socialM

    Breaking the generational barriers

    264
    1
    615 Votes
    264 Posts
    0 Views
    H
    They are allowed to joke about that because your comment is equally as overdone and unhinged. As if you don't have plant based grease.
  • D

    Ha, ha, ha, ha, uh huh

    lemmyshitpost
    3
    2
    24 Votes
    3 Posts
    0 Views
    popekingjoe@lemmy.worldP
    City's breaking down on a camel's back They just have to go, 'cause they don't know wack
  • L

    Where to find a girlfriend like her!?

    lemmyshitpost
    4
    1
    1 Votes
    4 Posts
    0 Views
    P
    Take me down to the paradise outside Where the grass is real and the girls are real Oh won't you please take me hooooome
  • ssupii@sopuli.xyzS

    choice

    lemmyshitpost
    24
    1
    73 Votes
    24 Posts
    0 Views
    wizard_pope@lemmy.worldW
    Love this copypasta
  • marighost@piefed.socialM

    Oatmeal

    95
    1
    155 Votes
    95 Posts
    0 Views
    machinist@lemmy.worldM
    Cats are absolute hell on wildlife, especially ground nesting birds, and should be removed from outdoors. That being said, that's completely fucked up that it was put on you by your father. It also sounds like you had to use a pellet/bb gun, the wrong tool. Also sounds like you might not have had much experience killing animals, completely understandable, cute housecats is a terrible place to start with that and is fucked up. He shouldn't have done that to you. I had a similar experience when I was 15 and working my first job, on a farm. Had to shoot a puppy. Guess my boss thought it would make me tough or something. I managed not to throw up or cry. My son is 15, I would never put something like that on him. He's killed rats with rat shot. He's watched me clean fish and squirrels. I'm hoping to have chickens next spring. My wife and I have talked about it, I'm going to teach him how to kill and clean a chicken. Killing always makes me a little sad, as it should. I don't even kill spiders unless it's a black widow or a brown recluse and it's inside a house or shed. I take the ethics of it very seriously. However, I think that if you're going to eat meat, you should have to kill and butcher at least once. We'd have a lot more vegans and more respect for life.
  • stamets@lemmy.worldS

    King forgot his crown

    lemmyshitpost
    72
    2
    528 Votes
    72 Posts
    0 Views
    tetris11@feddit.ukT
    Or he's just good with the D. He might also be good at delivering other Vitamins too
  • the_picard_maneuver@lemmy.worldT

    Ethereal

    lemmyshitpost
    5
    2
    101 Votes
    5 Posts
    0 Views
    regalpotoo@lemmy.worldR
    Stands on scale Presses tare button Immediately evaporates
  • edward@lemmy.4d2.orgE

    Pass me to your interior designer

    lemmyshitpost
    14
    2
    68 Votes
    14 Posts
    0 Views
    allnewtypeface@leminal.spaceA
    You laugh now, but a hundred years after the collapse of technological civilisation, the surviving mass-produced artefacts of that lost age will be associated with great prestige and power. Imposing buildings like palaces and cathedrals will feature parts from long-lost machines as prominent architectural features to signal the power and proximity to the divine of those who commissioned them.
  • G

    You know You want to

    lemmyshitpost
    10
    2
    131 Votes
    10 Posts
    0 Views
    D
    Whatever you say, Mr. Billboard. [image: ca20db1c-d905-438c-93a2-bce8d48605bc.jpeg]
  • ssupii@sopuli.xyzS

    parking

    lemmyshitpost
    13
    1
    189 Votes
    13 Posts
    0 Views
    rockerface@lemmy.cafeR
    Wouldn't be surprised to see a road like that in Ukraine, too. Especially in older towns that haven't renovated the infrastructure
  • therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zoneT

    Orange you glad I didn't say ananas?

    lemmyshitpost
    19
    1
    110 Votes
    19 Posts
    0 Views
    F
    Thanks, dad
  • marighost@piefed.socialM

    salty

    7
    1
    55 Votes
    7 Posts
    0 Views
    N
    Le epic troll
  • M

    Hard choice to make

    lemmyshitpost
    14
    2
    209 Votes
    14 Posts
    0 Views
    gon@lemmy.dbzer0.comG
    Not to tell you how to live your life - and do take note that I don't know you or your dad personally - but this sounds like a piece of generational trauma that you have the opportunity to get rid of. Best of luck!
  • thal3s@sh.itjust.worksT

    Dunkin' Donuts Drinks

    lemmyshitpost
    10
    2
    31 Votes
    10 Posts
    0 Views
    J
    I always thought this was mainly a US thing (the super sugary coffee drinks,in gallon size), until I talked to some Italian friends that drink cappuccino with more sugar than milk. And they describe it as being something that their parents did as well.
  • G

    What sort of grill needs a firmware update lol

    lemmyshitpost
    209
    1
    913 Votes
    209 Posts
    0 Views
    xavier666@lemmy.umucat.dayX
    The Salmonella will not die until Oops, RnD team accidentally created indestructible Salmonella bacteria which consumes flesh. Management was pushing RnD to create a better bacteria because hobbyist grill people were killing the bacteria and bypassing the DRM on the grill, but it escaped the lab. It has infected nearly all animals other than sea fish because of proximity. Survivors build floating cities on the sea and thus we have Waterworld!
  • yuyarl@sh.itjust.worksY

    The havoc is often trigger happy

    lemmyshitpost
    10
    2
    37 Votes
    10 Posts
    0 Views
    grillgamesh@lemmy.dbzer0.comG
    obligatory firearm safety reminder: rule one is "keep your finger off the trigger until ready to fire" rule two is "never point the weapon at anything you are not willing to destroy" rule three is "always treat any weapon as though it is loaded" rule four is "know your target and what lays beyond it" only by holding each other accountable can we make sure that everyone stays safe and has fun.
  • thal3s@sh.itjust.worksT

    Grandma is on her own

    lemmyshitpost
    85
    2
    424 Votes
    85 Posts
    0 Views
    hanrahan@slrpnk.netH
    [image: b4729c71-d86f-4526-b1b5-50167149a41b.png]