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  3. What's your funniest professional deformation?

What's your funniest professional deformation?

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Asklemmy
asklemmy
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  • M [email protected]

    When the automatisms you acquired during your job are invading your private life.

    When i was an intern in a big store, i had to fight against the reflex of storing the shelves during my own shopping sessions.

    E This user is from outside of this forum
    E This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by
    #13

    i worked at starbucks during its heyday in the 90's and it turned me into an espresso snob thanks to the training they used to put their barista through.

    they stopped doing that sometime in the 2000's and now i'm so bougie that starbucks is beneath my standards. lol

    i'm the same way with food; i used to make my own tortillas and now everything store bought is beneath my standards too. lol

    A P 2 Replies Last reply
    0
    • M [email protected]

      When the automatisms you acquired during your job are invading your private life.

      When i was an intern in a big store, i had to fight against the reflex of storing the shelves during my own shopping sessions.

      C This user is from outside of this forum
      C This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote on last edited by
      #14

      I work in commercial and institutional building energy efficiency. I notice myself paying way more attention to the infrastructure that normally fades into the background. Stuff like “I wonder how big the transformer for this building is?” or “Ooh, that’s a hefty cooling tower, I wonder how much chilled water they use?”

      sturgist@lemmy.caS 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • S [email protected]

        Behind!

        If you've worked in hospitality, you know.

        djdarren@sopuli.xyzD This user is from outside of this forum
        djdarren@sopuli.xyzD This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #15

        Yes Jeff!

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • R [email protected]

          As a boilermaker, I can't not go anywhere and not inspect the quality of welds, I see spatter and undercut and I'm like, who the fuck let that out of the shop

          djdarren@sopuli.xyzD This user is from outside of this forum
          djdarren@sopuli.xyzD This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by
          #16

          Yep. Welder in a previous life, and can't go to travelling fun fairs without casting an eye over the rides.

          S O 2 Replies Last reply
          0
          • B [email protected]

            Ooo You've got good veins, I could get a huge cannula into that one.

            S This user is from outside of this forum
            S This user is from outside of this forum
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            wrote on last edited by
            #17

            that's the sweetest thing I've heard all day

            B 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • K [email protected]

              My honey ended a phone conversation last night with his cousin with "thank you for your time." Just running on autopilot.

              I have reverse work/life autopilot. I've ended voicemails with "love you! Er, uh, that just came out by accident. I mean I am fond of you but...well, crap, just call me back."

              S This user is from outside of this forum
              S This user is from outside of this forum
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              wrote on last edited by
              #18

              I have been terrified of saying "love you" at the end of a work call. It just seems to be at the top of conversational options when hanging up.

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • djdarren@sopuli.xyzD [email protected]

                Yep. Welder in a previous life, and can't go to travelling fun fairs without casting an eye over the rides.

                S This user is from outside of this forum
                S This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #19

                That seems like a useful skill.

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • S [email protected]

                  that's the sweetest thing I've heard all day

                  B This user is from outside of this forum
                  B This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #20

                  It disturbs most people unless they are also in healthcare.
                  The other thing is really inappropriate meal conversations.

                  N W 2 Replies Last reply
                  0
                  • M [email protected]

                    When the automatisms you acquired during your job are invading your private life.

                    When i was an intern in a big store, i had to fight against the reflex of storing the shelves during my own shopping sessions.

                    ? Offline
                    ? Offline
                    Guest
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #21

                    I am an English as second language teacher, and sometimes when I'm talking in my first language I say things like "sure" or "great", and get extremely embarrassed after that.

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • M [email protected]

                      When the automatisms you acquired during your job are invading your private life.

                      When i was an intern in a big store, i had to fight against the reflex of storing the shelves during my own shopping sessions.

                      K This user is from outside of this forum
                      K This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #22

                      Worked in retail for 8 years and still feel no joy in my life over a decade later. Does that count?

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • southsamurai@sh.itjust.worksS [email protected]

                        Checking people over.

                        Used to be a nurse's assistant, among other jobs. So I have the unnerving habit of eyeballing everyone I know and asking them questions when they show even a hint of difficulty.

                        I see something on their arm, I'm likely to be reaching for them before I stop to think to ask permission. Luckily, I don't do it with strangers because I hate touching or being touched when I don't know the person, but it gets plenty of eye rolls from the people I do know lol.

                        Skin check!

                        Oh, I see you holding your belly, when did you last move your bowels?

                        Then again, some of them are fine with it.

                        My buddy, Spider, the last time he had a big party, he showed up the next day, said he went a little crazy, stood up and whipped out his dick. It was abraded, but otherwise intact and with no signs of infection. And yes, before I could stop myself, I was leaning forward and looking closely.

                        Because it was Spider, he wiggled it at me and said, in a squeaky little voice "hello Mr sasquatch, do you want a kees?"

                        I love that guy, but I slapped his balls for that one

                        W This user is from outside of this forum
                        W This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #23

                        when did you last move your bowels?

                        Technically when I walked in to the exam room!

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • djdarren@sopuli.xyzD [email protected]

                          Yep. Welder in a previous life, and can't go to travelling fun fairs without casting an eye over the rides.

                          O This user is from outside of this forum
                          O This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #24

                          That seems like a great way to never ride anything again ever...

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • E [email protected]

                            i worked at starbucks during its heyday in the 90's and it turned me into an espresso snob thanks to the training they used to put their barista through.

                            they stopped doing that sometime in the 2000's and now i'm so bougie that starbucks is beneath my standards. lol

                            i'm the same way with food; i used to make my own tortillas and now everything store bought is beneath my standards too. lol

                            A This user is from outside of this forum
                            A This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #25

                            in the ’90s*

                            meekah@lemmy.worldM 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • A [email protected]

                              in the ’90s*

                              meekah@lemmy.worldM This user is from outside of this forum
                              meekah@lemmy.worldM This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #26

                              Username checks out

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • M [email protected]

                                When the automatisms you acquired during your job are invading your private life.

                                When i was an intern in a big store, i had to fight against the reflex of storing the shelves during my own shopping sessions.

                                B This user is from outside of this forum
                                B This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #27

                                Inventorying and alphabetizing all of my physical media.

                                Retail for a decade.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • lime@feddit.nuL [email protected]

                                  every website hurts me

                                  G This user is from outside of this forum
                                  G This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #28

                                  Same, but also apps

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • B [email protected]

                                    It disturbs most people unless they are also in healthcare.
                                    The other thing is really inappropriate meal conversations.

                                    N This user is from outside of this forum
                                    N This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #29

                                    Or if they bodybuild. Big complement in that community.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • B [email protected]

                                      It disturbs most people unless they are also in healthcare.
                                      The other thing is really inappropriate meal conversations.

                                      W This user is from outside of this forum
                                      W This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #30

                                      I creep yall out back staring at it when the needle goes in.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • B [email protected]

                                        Going out to pubs and pointing out all the missing or lacking essential safety measures.

                                        Going pretty much anywhere and talking about the breaches of electrical safety requirements.

                                        In airports and explaining all the ways they aren’t complying with safety regulations. And now that I don’t work in an airport anymore I don’t know what to do with all that VERY specific knowledge.

                                        M This user is from outside of this forum
                                        M This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #31

                                        I don’t know what to do with all that VERY specific knowledge.

                                        Anonymously tip it to regulating authorities?

                                        Or the news, to force a resolution and get some amusement?

                                        Maybe I'm too much of a keyboard vigilante lol...

                                        B 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • southsamurai@sh.itjust.worksS [email protected]

                                          Checking people over.

                                          Used to be a nurse's assistant, among other jobs. So I have the unnerving habit of eyeballing everyone I know and asking them questions when they show even a hint of difficulty.

                                          I see something on their arm, I'm likely to be reaching for them before I stop to think to ask permission. Luckily, I don't do it with strangers because I hate touching or being touched when I don't know the person, but it gets plenty of eye rolls from the people I do know lol.

                                          Skin check!

                                          Oh, I see you holding your belly, when did you last move your bowels?

                                          Then again, some of them are fine with it.

                                          My buddy, Spider, the last time he had a big party, he showed up the next day, said he went a little crazy, stood up and whipped out his dick. It was abraded, but otherwise intact and with no signs of infection. And yes, before I could stop myself, I was leaning forward and looking closely.

                                          Because it was Spider, he wiggled it at me and said, in a squeaky little voice "hello Mr sasquatch, do you want a kees?"

                                          I love that guy, but I slapped his balls for that one

                                          M This user is from outside of this forum
                                          M This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #32

                                          This comment descended more into bizarre whimsical madness with every paragraph lmao.

                                          southsamurai@sh.itjust.worksS 1 Reply Last reply
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