A simple sign on a fence asking the question we all ponder
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No, you and those 72 virgins just have to hang out and take turns playing Mario Kart
Also, theyre all the kind of virgin whos way better at video games than you.
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St. Peter: "Smoking or non-smoking?"
You: "Uh... Smoking!"
is sent to Hell
Lies. What do you think the holy ghost is made from? That's pure nicotine my friend. People get quite a buzz just being on the same cloud with him. God works in mysterious ways.
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Not sure if there will be for me, but I know for a fact that there has been some for others.
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Do you believe in sex after life after love?
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With a monthly donation, I can help you achieve your spirtial goals.
Sounds good, which onlyfans page does your god run?
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Depends on, most christian scolars say sex is a "material thing" that you won't need in heaven.
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Some times you just have to crack open a cold one
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Depends on, most christian scolars say sex is a "material thing" that you won't need in heaven.
wrote last edited by [email protected]Is there horniness in Heaven? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe you're more at peace and that includes not having some basic bodily needs/itches. Are there videogames in Heaven?!
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Sex is uniative and procreative.
Paradise is already both those things. There would be no need for more.
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I've heard in hindu mythology, virtuous men can spend time in heaven with apsaras (beautiful heavenly women). not sure if that means sex. also no idea what is there for gay men or straight women. probably they go to hell.
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Donate your body to a group of necrophiliacs and the answer is yes.
Can't believe I have to die to get laid
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You die and your last thought was...is there penis enlargement in heaven? Suddenly you wake up going at hundreds of miles an hour into a big cloud. Just you hanging on tightly to a rope that is pulling you into the cloud. And you hear...yes!...yes indeed! Indeed there is! But you don't want it. The voice getting louder and louder as you get closer and closer. You start noticing the earth getting smaller. You can see your house from here, you think....I know right? It replies. The rope! You can see its details, there are no threads on it! Just the feel of rubber. Look closer, there are interesting patterns on it...unique to... Wait are those veins? .....yes!.....and why is the cloud hairy? Is there penis enlargement in heaven? .....yes!, now get off mine! The voice insists now as strong as if you were in a concert theater. It's not rope! You've been riding Peter's penis! .....yes, well I was sleeping and its morning! Peter explains. Sorry bud! Looks like it got you!...he flings you off with a finger and you fall into a busy heaven street. Everyone looking at you happy and naked. We were expecting you any day says Jeff your buddy from highschool.... Yup, he's a grower, not a shower!
As it turns out everyone used to live infinite lives until peter got his penis extension. Now every morning here, as he gets his wood, someone gets smashed by it. When he wakes up and the thing goes back to normal they get up here same way you did bud!...well sometimes it's not just one. Sometimes its a bunch at a time. Anyway, its two blocks that way, then to your left. Can't miss it! .... Wha?....the penis enlargement place....oh..
