Skip to content
  • Categories
  • Recent
  • Tags
  • Popular
  • World
  • Users
  • Groups
Skins
  • Light
  • Cerulean
  • Cosmo
  • Flatly
  • Journal
  • Litera
  • Lumen
  • Lux
  • Materia
  • Minty
  • Morph
  • Pulse
  • Sandstone
  • Simplex
  • Sketchy
  • Spacelab
  • United
  • Yeti
  • Zephyr
  • Dark
  • Cyborg
  • Darkly
  • Quartz
  • Slate
  • Solar
  • Superhero
  • Vapor

  • Default (No Skin)
  • No Skin
Collapse
Brand Logo

agnos.is Forums

  1. Home
  2. Asklemmy
  3. would dating him be worth it, do you think he could love me and would calm down if i said yes?

would dating him be worth it, do you think he could love me and would calm down if i said yes?

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Asklemmy
asklemmy
38 Posts 27 Posters 107 Views
  • Oldest to Newest
  • Newest to Oldest
  • Most Votes
Reply
  • Reply as topic
Log in to reply
This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
  • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

    i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me. i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked just to have a man that treats me right and fit in with straight women who have bfs.

    he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his ex of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

    he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

    i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

    H This user is from outside of this forum
    H This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by
    #16

    That man has more red flags than a flag football team.

    I 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

      i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me. i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked just to have a man that treats me right and fit in with straight women who have bfs.

      he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his ex of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

      he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

      i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

      blueether@no.lastname.nzB This user is from outside of this forum
      blueether@no.lastname.nzB This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote on last edited by
      #17

      As a straight guy <sinp some pointless comment>, stat the fuck away from that guy

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

        i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me. i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked just to have a man that treats me right and fit in with straight women who have bfs.

        he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his ex of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

        he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

        i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

        zak@lemmy.worldZ This user is from outside of this forum
        zak@lemmy.worldZ This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #18

        I'm not going to tell you what to do. I am going to point out the red flags you cited and ask what you would say to a friend who was considering dating someone who behaves like this.

        he kept talking about... that i should’ve ditched my bf for him

        In other words, he did not respect your relationship when you were in one.

        badmouthed not only his gf of a few years

        He handles struggles in a relationship by badmouthing his partner to others,

        he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia

        and uses an armchair diagnosis as an excuse to get out of a relationship instead of just saying it's not working for him anymore like an adult.

        he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn’t want to be his gf

        He doesn't care about your preferences, and tries to manipulate you when they don't match his.

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

          thanks so much, i blocked him because he wouldn’t stop harassing me. he told me to ditch my bf for him and didn’t care that i didn’t have feelings for him. in fact, he didn’t care much about my personality or identity so long as i was his girlfriend. that’s all he saw, nothing else outside of that.

          and even though he wanted me to “take my time”, he was convinced i was his future wife despite only having known me for about a week all because i was pretty and nice to him.

          reallyzen@lemmy.mlR This user is from outside of this forum
          reallyzen@lemmy.mlR This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by
          #19

          Re-read your own words. This went from unhealthy to straight-up dangerous.

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

            i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me. i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked just to have a man that treats me right and fit in with straight women who have bfs.

            he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his ex of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

            he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

            i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

            I This user is from outside of this forum
            I This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote on last edited by
            #20

            Oh god you’re a mess. Don’t date women either….

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • H [email protected]

              That man has more red flags than a flag football team.

              I This user is from outside of this forum
              I This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote on last edited by
              #21

              Sounds perfect for this woman with a nearly equal amount of red flags

              auroraglamour@lemmy.mlA 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

                i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me. i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked just to have a man that treats me right and fit in with straight women who have bfs.

                he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his ex of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

                he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

                i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

                B This user is from outside of this forum
                B This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #22

                No offense, but you really need to figure yourself our before you try dating anyone else. This post has a lot of red flags.

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

                  i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me. i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked just to have a man that treats me right and fit in with straight women who have bfs.

                  he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his ex of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

                  he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

                  i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

                  A This user is from outside of this forum
                  A This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #23

                  You don’t want that guy. What you want is attention, and he was the last person to give it to you, therefore you think you want him.

                  Just get dressed up and go to a bar, and you’ll find enough guys who will give you that, without the red flags.

                  drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

                    i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me. i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked just to have a man that treats me right and fit in with straight women who have bfs.

                    he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his ex of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

                    he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

                    i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

                    A This user is from outside of this forum
                    A This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #24

                    You don't genuinely like him, you're just lonely. Plus, he doesn't respect you at all, or his previous girlfriend. He won't treat you right, but let's be honest, even if he was the greatest man in the world, you're not actually into him.

                    It sounds like you're having a really hard time and you just want some tenderness and support, but you won't get it from a misogynist.

                    Keep him blocked, and take care of yourself.

                    drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

                      i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me. i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked just to have a man that treats me right and fit in with straight women who have bfs.

                      he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his ex of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

                      he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

                      i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

                      R This user is from outside of this forum
                      R This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #25

                      Literally everything is a red flag in this post. Stay far away from this person.

                      I personally think you need to take some time off dating in general (both women and men) to really figure out what you want (not just sexually or romantically, but what you want a relationship to be). Don't let other people influence that.

                      Also unrelated, but make sure you stay far away from drugs. They will make not just this situation, but every situation worse.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

                        i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me. i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked just to have a man that treats me right and fit in with straight women who have bfs.

                        he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his ex of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

                        he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

                        i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

                        rustyfish@lemmy.worldR This user is from outside of this forum
                        rustyfish@lemmy.worldR This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #26

                        You basically just described a walking, talking red flag. What an asshole. That’s your answer btw: no.

                        Also, just going into a relationship to cure your loneliness is insultingly unfair for your future partner. This red flag is on you.

                        Just sort your own stuff out and stay away from any relationship for a while. You will only hurt yourself and others when starting one now.

                        drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD zea_64@lemmy.blahaj.zoneZ 2 Replies Last reply
                        0
                        • rustyfish@lemmy.worldR [email protected]

                          You basically just described a walking, talking red flag. What an asshole. That’s your answer btw: no.

                          Also, just going into a relationship to cure your loneliness is insultingly unfair for your future partner. This red flag is on you.

                          Just sort your own stuff out and stay away from any relationship for a while. You will only hurt yourself and others when starting one now.

                          drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD This user is from outside of this forum
                          drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #27

                          that makes sense

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • A [email protected]

                            You don't genuinely like him, you're just lonely. Plus, he doesn't respect you at all, or his previous girlfriend. He won't treat you right, but let's be honest, even if he was the greatest man in the world, you're not actually into him.

                            It sounds like you're having a really hard time and you just want some tenderness and support, but you won't get it from a misogynist.

                            Keep him blocked, and take care of yourself.

                            drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD This user is from outside of this forum
                            drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #28

                            thanks so much 🫂 gave me the ick a little that he barely acknowledged that i liked girls. he only cared about if i liked guys or had a bf, he only got upset when i liked a guy.

                            it’s almost as if he was trying to act like i was straight, which was a bit insulting to me. if i had a gf/liked a girl, he would act like that meant i was just single and not attracted to anyone at all.

                            ricoperu@lemmy.blahaj.zoneR A 2 Replies Last reply
                            0
                            • A [email protected]

                              You don’t want that guy. What you want is attention, and he was the last person to give it to you, therefore you think you want him.

                              Just get dressed up and go to a bar, and you’ll find enough guys who will give you that, without the red flags.

                              drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD This user is from outside of this forum
                              drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #29

                              thanks so much!

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • rustyfish@lemmy.worldR [email protected]

                                You basically just described a walking, talking red flag. What an asshole. That’s your answer btw: no.

                                Also, just going into a relationship to cure your loneliness is insultingly unfair for your future partner. This red flag is on you.

                                Just sort your own stuff out and stay away from any relationship for a while. You will only hurt yourself and others when starting one now.

                                zea_64@lemmy.blahaj.zoneZ This user is from outside of this forum
                                zea_64@lemmy.blahaj.zoneZ This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #30

                                I don't think it's unfair as long as you clearly communicate it and the other person is okay with it. Lots of oddities can be okay and fair as long as they're clearly communicated about and agreed on.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

                                  thanks so much 🫂 gave me the ick a little that he barely acknowledged that i liked girls. he only cared about if i liked guys or had a bf, he only got upset when i liked a guy.

                                  it’s almost as if he was trying to act like i was straight, which was a bit insulting to me. if i had a gf/liked a girl, he would act like that meant i was just single and not attracted to anyone at all.

                                  ricoperu@lemmy.blahaj.zoneR This user is from outside of this forum
                                  ricoperu@lemmy.blahaj.zoneR This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #31

                                  as a bigender person, i identified as transfem as a teen. i had similar problems online where men would deny my bisexuality because for some reason, it’s gay for me to have a close and intimate friendship with a dude now that i’m more masc, but as a transfem, dating women just means “you’re gal pals”

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

                                    i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me. i don't even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked just to have a man that treats me right and fit in with straight women who have bfs.

                                    he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should've ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his ex of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.

                                    he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn't want to be his gf so ik he doesn't care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.

                                    i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i'm probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.

                                    T This user is from outside of this forum
                                    T This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #32

                                    Someone who will treat you well won't need to tell you that they will treat you well. It's kind of like how liars and scammers make a big deal about how honest they are. Another big clue is that he was telling you this while both of you were with other people. He cheats on one partner, he'd cheat on you, too.

                                    ricoperu@lemmy.blahaj.zoneR drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD 2 Replies Last reply
                                    0
                                    • T [email protected]

                                      Someone who will treat you well won't need to tell you that they will treat you well. It's kind of like how liars and scammers make a big deal about how honest they are. Another big clue is that he was telling you this while both of you were with other people. He cheats on one partner, he'd cheat on you, too.

                                      ricoperu@lemmy.blahaj.zoneR This user is from outside of this forum
                                      ricoperu@lemmy.blahaj.zoneR This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #33

                                      i agree with this. also, i feel like if they do it (he never said if they wore protection), the girl might’ve been acting weird because she was pregnant and he just leaves her. that’s sick.

                                      (i cant say for sure but it might be a possibility)

                                      op, it’s possible that he just wants u to meet up with him, have sex, and then leave once u either dont act how he wants u too or if u get pregnant. since he doesn’t seem to take no for an answer, he could also either pressure you into sex or just pressure you into not wearing protection if you choose to do so.

                                      he doesn’t accept dissent in other matters, why would he in sex? especially if he discusses sexual topics with you.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • T [email protected]

                                        Someone who will treat you well won't need to tell you that they will treat you well. It's kind of like how liars and scammers make a big deal about how honest they are. Another big clue is that he was telling you this while both of you were with other people. He cheats on one partner, he'd cheat on you, too.

                                        drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD This user is from outside of this forum
                                        drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #34

                                        he broke up before he said all this. he was clearly into me and hitting on me before they broke up though, and the rest still stands. tysm

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • drbollocks@lemmy.blahaj.zoneD [email protected]

                                          thanks so much 🫂 gave me the ick a little that he barely acknowledged that i liked girls. he only cared about if i liked guys or had a bf, he only got upset when i liked a guy.

                                          it’s almost as if he was trying to act like i was straight, which was a bit insulting to me. if i had a gf/liked a girl, he would act like that meant i was just single and not attracted to anyone at all.

                                          A This user is from outside of this forum
                                          A This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #35

                                          Listen to that ick!! That's the part of you that knows your worth

                                          1 Reply Last reply
                                          0
                                          Reply
                                          • Reply as topic
                                          Log in to reply
                                          • Oldest to Newest
                                          • Newest to Oldest
                                          • Most Votes


                                          • Login

                                          • Login or register to search.
                                          • First post
                                            Last post
                                          0
                                          • Categories
                                          • Recent
                                          • Tags
                                          • Popular
                                          • World
                                          • Users
                                          • Groups