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  3. I'm scared to post this anywhere because people will interpret it as me being misogynistic.

I'm scared to post this anywhere because people will interpret it as me being misogynistic.

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Lemmy Shitpost
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  • L [email protected]

    I don’t like being associated with anti-racism for a single reason - not everyone agrees that both black and white people suffer, and the blame is often shifted on white people as “carriers of systemic racism”. Besides, it is originally about black people fighting for their rights, not white people, and at any point in time black people can note that it’s for and about black people, effectively shaking off the very white people who promoted it - and to some degree, they will be correct.

    We can do better by building a wider anti-racist community. At the end of the day, all we want, as long as we act in good faith, is for everyone to be equal in their rights and opportunities. Black people face racism. White people face racism. Some of it stems from systemic racism, some of it might come from other angles. We should come together not under the banner of Black Lives Matter, not under the banner of White Lives Matter, but from the neutral ground if we ever hope to achieve a society that treats #AllLives as equals.

    This is how these comments come across to me.

    There’s a power imbalance. Feminism is about bringing women up and redistributing the power.

    Men should be able to talk about their issues. And I feel like they usually are. It’s not a problem.

    It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women. Or when it’s done without awareness of the history of the power imbalance.

    A lot of it isn’t to be taken personally and if it is, I think that says something about you. When I hear blame and anger towards privileged groups that I’m a part of, even if I suffer too, my gut reaction is never “but…”

    I understand that these movements are reactions to the power, the history, and the general picture.

    hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zoneH This user is from outside of this forum
    hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zoneH This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by
    #21


    Either you're a feminist or you're a misogynist, it's simple.

    A D 2 Replies Last reply
    1
    • D [email protected]

      Technically, everyone that doesn't identify as "men". But it's done in the abstract, negative space of the message by not saying it. Subtle, but without clarifying things, it's left open to this interpretation.

      hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zoneH This user is from outside of this forum
      hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zoneH This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote on last edited by
      #22

      It isn't inclusive of everyone because it is about a specific group. I'm getting 'all lives matter' vibes from your comment.

      D 1 Reply Last reply
      1
      • D [email protected]

        I've very rarely see that from feminist circles. And even then it feels like we can only have the emotions they want us to have and not the ones we do have.

        D This user is from outside of this forum
        D This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #23

        I've had the same experience. Or if you do hear about it, it's reluctant and only in relation to how it affects women.

        I'm fine with women having their own advocacy group, I don't think they're equipped to take on men too.

        mitm0@lemmy.worldM D 2 Replies Last reply
        4
        • L [email protected]

          I don’t like being associated with anti-racism for a single reason - not everyone agrees that both black and white people suffer, and the blame is often shifted on white people as “carriers of systemic racism”. Besides, it is originally about black people fighting for their rights, not white people, and at any point in time black people can note that it’s for and about black people, effectively shaking off the very white people who promoted it - and to some degree, they will be correct.

          We can do better by building a wider anti-racist community. At the end of the day, all we want, as long as we act in good faith, is for everyone to be equal in their rights and opportunities. Black people face racism. White people face racism. Some of it stems from systemic racism, some of it might come from other angles. We should come together not under the banner of Black Lives Matter, not under the banner of White Lives Matter, but from the neutral ground if we ever hope to achieve a society that treats #AllLives as equals.

          This is how these comments come across to me.

          There’s a power imbalance. Feminism is about bringing women up and redistributing the power.

          Men should be able to talk about their issues. And I feel like they usually are. It’s not a problem.

          It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women. Or when it’s done without awareness of the history of the power imbalance.

          A lot of it isn’t to be taken personally and if it is, I think that says something about you. When I hear blame and anger towards privileged groups that I’m a part of, even if I suffer too, my gut reaction is never “but…”

          I understand that these movements are reactions to the power, the history, and the general picture.

          captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC This user is from outside of this forum
          captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by
          #24

          It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women.

          You're talking about feminism in a thread started about men's mental health.

          Dearest Kettle,

          I write to you on this auspicious occasion to bring into your awareness a matter which has consumed my attention as of late. It seems you bear a certain patina of the very darkest of colors, one might even go so far as to call you "black."

          Eternally yours,

          Pot

          L 1 Reply Last reply
          1
          • captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC [email protected]

            It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women.

            You're talking about feminism in a thread started about men's mental health.

            Dearest Kettle,

            I write to you on this auspicious occasion to bring into your awareness a matter which has consumed my attention as of late. It seems you bear a certain patina of the very darkest of colors, one might even go so far as to call you "black."

            Eternally yours,

            Pot

            L This user is from outside of this forum
            L This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote on last edited by
            #25

            I’m replying to a comment about feminism, moron.

            captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • L [email protected]

              I’m replying to a comment about feminism, moron.

              captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC This user is from outside of this forum
              captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote on last edited by
              #26

              And the entire topic of feminism was brought up to hijack a conversation about men. Moron.

              L 1 Reply Last reply
              1
              • D [email protected]

                I've had the same experience. Or if you do hear about it, it's reluctant and only in relation to how it affects women.

                I'm fine with women having their own advocacy group, I don't think they're equipped to take on men too.

                mitm0@lemmy.worldM This user is from outside of this forum
                mitm0@lemmy.worldM This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #27

                Buddy they oppose & damage & hijack men's issues
                (E.g: Conscription & False allegations)

                1 Reply Last reply
                4
                • captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC [email protected]

                  And the entire topic of feminism was brought up to hijack a conversation about men. Moron.

                  L This user is from outside of this forum
                  L This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #28

                  The comment thread I replied to didn’t start with feminism but with fears of being seen as a misogynist when bringing up OP’s points. This naturally led to a conversation about feminism being a movement that aims to abolish this kind of thing.

                  captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • L [email protected]

                    I don’t like being associated with anti-racism for a single reason - not everyone agrees that both black and white people suffer, and the blame is often shifted on white people as “carriers of systemic racism”. Besides, it is originally about black people fighting for their rights, not white people, and at any point in time black people can note that it’s for and about black people, effectively shaking off the very white people who promoted it - and to some degree, they will be correct.

                    We can do better by building a wider anti-racist community. At the end of the day, all we want, as long as we act in good faith, is for everyone to be equal in their rights and opportunities. Black people face racism. White people face racism. Some of it stems from systemic racism, some of it might come from other angles. We should come together not under the banner of Black Lives Matter, not under the banner of White Lives Matter, but from the neutral ground if we ever hope to achieve a society that treats #AllLives as equals.

                    This is how these comments come across to me.

                    There’s a power imbalance. Feminism is about bringing women up and redistributing the power.

                    Men should be able to talk about their issues. And I feel like they usually are. It’s not a problem.

                    It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women. Or when it’s done without awareness of the history of the power imbalance.

                    A lot of it isn’t to be taken personally and if it is, I think that says something about you. When I hear blame and anger towards privileged groups that I’m a part of, even if I suffer too, my gut reaction is never “but…”

                    I understand that these movements are reactions to the power, the history, and the general picture.

                    A This user is from outside of this forum
                    A This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                    #29

                    The problem is in your first remake of the quote.

                    I don't like being associated with anti-racism...

                    I support antisexism. You just equated feminism and antisexism again, while I do my best to highlight the distinction between them, as the latter is a bigger category than the former.

                    Nothing wrong with feminism as a fight for women's rights, but looking at mens' problems through the prism of feminism is the same as looking at racism against whites through the prism of BLM, or apples through bananas. That's simply the wrong tool, and I suggest having the swiss knife to have them all. Also, the issue of racism is much more one-sided (at least on the West) compared to sexism, so it's not an overly accurate prism to watch through.

                    There is feminism - about women. There is masculism (which is currently heavily discredited by patriarchal shitheads, but originally comes from the same place of equality as feminism) - about men. There are also nonbinaries fighting for their place in the world. And there is antisexism combining them all.

                    L I 2 Replies Last reply
                    3
                    • D [email protected]

                      I've had the same experience. Or if you do hear about it, it's reluctant and only in relation to how it affects women.

                      I'm fine with women having their own advocacy group, I don't think they're equipped to take on men too.

                      D This user is from outside of this forum
                      D This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #30

                      And whenever there is a push for a male advocacy group it gets labeled as some incel shit. Which attracts alt right types and suddenly it's yet another pro republican group.

                      Men can't have advocacy groups.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      7
                      • L [email protected]

                        The comment thread I replied to didn’t start with feminism but with fears of being seen as a misogynist when bringing up OP’s points. This naturally led to a conversation about feminism being a movement that aims to abolish this kind of thing.

                        captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC This user is from outside of this forum
                        captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #31

                        Feminism is anti-male. That's all it is.

                        L 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zoneH [email protected]


                          Either you're a feminist or you're a misogynist, it's simple.

                          A This user is from outside of this forum
                          A This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                          #32

                          I support feminist ideas, but don't find them fitting to look at mens' problems.

                          You randomly slap misogynist labels left and right because you got so rigid you cannot even start to comprehend any view more nuanced than "feminism will save us all!"

                          Nothing wrong with feminism when it comes to women and their issues, by the way.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          4
                          • A [email protected]

                            The problem is in your first remake of the quote.

                            I don't like being associated with anti-racism...

                            I support antisexism. You just equated feminism and antisexism again, while I do my best to highlight the distinction between them, as the latter is a bigger category than the former.

                            Nothing wrong with feminism as a fight for women's rights, but looking at mens' problems through the prism of feminism is the same as looking at racism against whites through the prism of BLM, or apples through bananas. That's simply the wrong tool, and I suggest having the swiss knife to have them all. Also, the issue of racism is much more one-sided (at least on the West) compared to sexism, so it's not an overly accurate prism to watch through.

                            There is feminism - about women. There is masculism (which is currently heavily discredited by patriarchal shitheads, but originally comes from the same place of equality as feminism) - about men. There are also nonbinaries fighting for their place in the world. And there is antisexism combining them all.

                            L This user is from outside of this forum
                            L This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #33

                            Source? You’re speaking with a lot of authority here and I’m not sure you fully know what you’re talking about. What you seem to be calling anti-sexism is often called intersectional feminism.

                            A 1 Reply Last reply
                            1
                            • T [email protected]

                              I'm scared to post this anywhere because people will interpret it as me being misogynistic. And that, IMO, is the biggest problem that men face. We're not allowed by society to be victims.

                              kilgore_trout@feddit.itK This user is from outside of this forum
                              kilgore_trout@feddit.itK This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #34

                              Stay strong, brother. You are not alone

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              1
                              • hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zoneH [email protected]

                                It isn't inclusive of everyone because it is about a specific group. I'm getting 'all lives matter' vibes from your comment.

                                D This user is from outside of this forum
                                D This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #35

                                Thanks for clarifying. I'm actually trying to argue the exact opposite of something like "all lives matter".

                                I 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.worksC [email protected]

                                  Feminism is anti-male. That's all it is.

                                  L This user is from outside of this forum
                                  L This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #36

                                  It’s not. Have you read much on it?

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • spankmonkey@lemmy.worldS [email protected]

                                    Do you also complain that gay pride and black history month aren't inclusive of everyone?

                                    D This user is from outside of this forum
                                    D This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #37

                                    Hardly. I added some clarification to my argument.

                                    spankmonkey@lemmy.worldS 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • A [email protected]

                                      I don't like being associated with feminism for a single reason - not everyone agrees that both women and men suffer, and the blame is often shifted on men as "carriers of patriarchy". Besides, it is originally about women fighting for their rights, not men, and at any point in time women can note that it's for the women and about women, effectively shaking off the very men who promoted it - and to some degree, they will be correct.

                                      We can do better by building a wider antisexist community. At the end of the day, all we want, as long as we act in good faith, is for everyone to be equal in their rights and opportunities. Women face sexism. Men face sexism. Some of it stems from patriarchy, some of it might come from other angles. We should come together not under the banner of feminism, not under the banner of masculism, but from the neutral ground if we ever hope to achieve a society that treats men and women as equals.

                                      S This user is from outside of this forum
                                      S This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #38

                                      No true Scotsman, amirite?

                                      Antisexism would be great. I'm not sure that it won't easily be coopted by toxic feminist or incels. But I'd join

                                      A 1 Reply Last reply
                                      3
                                      • D [email protected]

                                        I've very rarely see that from feminist circles. And even then it feels like we can only have the emotions they want us to have and not the ones we do have.

                                        S This user is from outside of this forum
                                        S This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #39

                                        What emotions do you have that you think you can't?

                                        You're allowed to have anger. But if you're like many, you conflate the anger feeling with the shouting/punching/violent actions. Toxic actions are bad, but the feelings are valid and ok. Need to find a proper way to express those emotions.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        2
                                        • T [email protected]

                                          Under some older meaning of feminist sure. But 90% of the people who claim to be feminist these days think of it solely as giving women more privilege, and any discussion of men's issues is considered anti-feminist. Whatever meaning of equality that there used to be is all but lost.

                                          S This user is from outside of this forum
                                          S This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #40

                                          Did you know that 74% of statistics are made up on the spot?

                                          How many feminist podcasts do you consume, and when did you notice the change?

                                          T 1 Reply Last reply
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