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  3. IT jobs explained with a broken lightbulb

IT jobs explained with a broken lightbulb

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Programmer Humor
programmerhumor
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  • openstars@piefed.socialO [email protected]

    Woah there buddy, you can't just jump straight into the (non-)solution like that! You skipped the planning refinement! And the planning pre-refinement! And the pre-planning pre-refinement! And we'll still discuss all of this in the post-planning refinement!

    (Yes, every one of these are real, distinct meetings, lasting at minimum one hour but sometimes two or more. EVERY WEEK. Kill me now please? 🥺)

    M This user is from outside of this forum
    M This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by
    #9

    And after all that it is discovered that it was the wrong solution all along because the requirements were poorly specified, so the process must be started all over again

    openstars@piefed.socialO 1 Reply Last reply
    7
    • M [email protected]

      And after all that it is discovered that it was the wrong solution all along because the requirements were poorly specified, so the process must be started all over again

      openstars@piefed.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
      openstars@piefed.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote on last edited by
      #10

      The circular justification of a PM's job, see how much value they add!?

      P 1 Reply Last reply
      3
      • openstars@piefed.socialO [email protected]

        The circular justification of a PM's job, see how much value they add!?

        P This user is from outside of this forum
        P This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #11

        So something I don't understand is the logic behind my job. I'm a software engineer, that effort makes sense to me to develop and solution and configure.

        But I've been given a product owner role. And then I have a product manager I work with who isn't technical.

        I really don't feel like I do much other than stress out

        openstars@piefed.socialO 1 Reply Last reply
        4
        • P [email protected]

          So something I don't understand is the logic behind my job. I'm a software engineer, that effort makes sense to me to develop and solution and configure.

          But I've been given a product owner role. And then I have a product manager I work with who isn't technical.

          I really don't feel like I do much other than stress out

          openstars@piefed.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
          openstars@piefed.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by
          #12

          Tbf that seems like the proper response to me.:-)

          Normal human ways of thinking go like: however you do it, so long as the job gets done it's fine! ☺️

          PM thinking: even if nothing ever gets done, so long as I collect a salary we continue to have 3 hours of meetings most days every week, it's all good! 🤔🤯

          Also, afaik, the conflict between the PO and PM roles is somehow literally the point? You get blamed if the tasks don't get done, while the PM ensures that endless reports get generated - I doubt the vast most of which are ever read, and I know that I for one can never find one of those later, in part bc there are so many of them and they encompass everything else into them as well (Jira tickets, Slack messages, hundreds of emails per day mostly saying "this Jira ticket or that Confluence page has been edited", the former of which for the life of me I cannot figure out how to turn off!).

          So... not only I but we all feel your pain! Otoh, that seems one of the first job roles that will soon be replaced by AI?

          P 1 Reply Last reply
          6
          • 7 [email protected]

            And then complain that the light bulb wasn't fixed in the time that a different team projected on the L1 from 3 years ago.

            P This user is from outside of this forum
            P This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote on last edited by
            #13

            Exactly. Also, prediction they're referencing from 3 years ago was to build a lemonade stand.

            1 Reply Last reply
            5
            • openstars@piefed.socialO [email protected]

              Tbf that seems like the proper response to me.:-)

              Normal human ways of thinking go like: however you do it, so long as the job gets done it's fine! ☺️

              PM thinking: even if nothing ever gets done, so long as I collect a salary we continue to have 3 hours of meetings most days every week, it's all good! 🤔🤯

              Also, afaik, the conflict between the PO and PM roles is somehow literally the point? You get blamed if the tasks don't get done, while the PM ensures that endless reports get generated - I doubt the vast most of which are ever read, and I know that I for one can never find one of those later, in part bc there are so many of them and they encompass everything else into them as well (Jira tickets, Slack messages, hundreds of emails per day mostly saying "this Jira ticket or that Confluence page has been edited", the former of which for the life of me I cannot figure out how to turn off!).

              So... not only I but we all feel your pain! Otoh, that seems one of the first job roles that will soon be replaced by AI?

              P This user is from outside of this forum
              P This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote on last edited by
              #14

              I have a feeling AI won't take my role, AI will force me to take ownership of more products. I worry greatly about that.

              openstars@piefed.socialO 1 Reply Last reply
              1
              • N [email protected]

                I’d say I feel seen, but it’s really dark in here.

                A This user is from outside of this forum
                A This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #15

                Who said that?

                N 1 Reply Last reply
                9
                • A [email protected]

                  Who said that?

                  N This user is from outside of this forum
                  N This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #16

                  [clicks light switch off and on repeatedly]

                  Welp, I guess we’re closed for the week.

                  pika@sh.itjust.worksP 1 Reply Last reply
                  4
                  • tetris11@lemmy.mlT [email protected]

                    Climate Scientists:

                    • The lightbulb is broken, and there's reason to believe that the ceiling might cave in
                    • Offers advice on how to fix the contacts, or to replace the bulb entirely, or put up struts to support the ceiling in an impassioned plea to the higher ups.
                    • CTO is committed already to candles, CFO wants to wait and see what happens, and CEO labels it as a marketing problem.
                    N This user is from outside of this forum
                    N This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #17

                    I came here to laugh, not to cry!

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    8
                    • T [email protected]

                      found in my archives

                      B This user is from outside of this forum
                      B This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #18

                      Support would be like

                      User reports lightbulb is broken.
                      Tries to talk user through troubleshooting.
                      Problem resolved by turning on light.

                      sabata11792@ani.socialS N T 3 Replies Last reply
                      44
                      • K [email protected]

                        I accidentally read the second to last comic as "hands out fleshlights". Would also work.

                        S This user is from outside of this forum
                        S This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #19

                        "by toggl Goon Squad"

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        7
                        • B [email protected]

                          Support would be like

                          User reports lightbulb is broken.
                          Tries to talk user through troubleshooting.
                          Problem resolved by turning on light.

                          sabata11792@ani.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                          sabata11792@ani.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #20

                          User can not find switch. Guided to switch, user said switch operation is too complicated and refused further troubleshooting. Escalated.

                          B 1 Reply Last reply
                          18
                          • B [email protected]

                            Support would be like

                            User reports lightbulb is broken.
                            Tries to talk user through troubleshooting.
                            Problem resolved by turning on light.

                            N This user is from outside of this forum
                            N This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #21

                            More like:

                            Use reports lightbulb is broken. Support spends an hour talking user through diagnostic tests. Determines that the lightbulb in question is a houseplant.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            17
                            • sabata11792@ani.socialS [email protected]

                              User can not find switch. Guided to switch, user said switch operation is too complicated and refused further troubleshooting. Escalated.

                              B This user is from outside of this forum
                              B This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #22

                              User is very upset. It was a broken bulb last time, so it must be a broken bulb this time. Why can't the help desk make bulbs that don't break? Bulb was fine, user was locking and unlocking the door instead of flipping the light switch.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              18
                              • T [email protected]

                                found in my archives

                                J This user is from outside of this forum
                                J This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #23

                                Full stack developer:

                                The lightbulb is broken. Deploys a lightweight fix that involves 17 metric tons of chandeliers, stadium floodlights, sconces, and the necessary infrastructure to operate the street lights for a city of 500.000. His solution delivers a solid 100 lm of light using only 175 MW of power.

                                capuccino@lemmy.worldC 1 Reply Last reply
                                47
                                • J [email protected]

                                  Full stack developer:

                                  The lightbulb is broken. Deploys a lightweight fix that involves 17 metric tons of chandeliers, stadium floodlights, sconces, and the necessary infrastructure to operate the street lights for a city of 500.000. His solution delivers a solid 100 lm of light using only 175 MW of power.

                                  capuccino@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                                  capuccino@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #24

                                  why they are like that 😞

                                  J 1 Reply Last reply
                                  11
                                  • T [email protected]

                                    found in my archives

                                    match@pawb.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    match@pawb.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #25

                                    honestly huge respect to ops

                                    T 1 Reply Last reply
                                    33
                                    • capuccino@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

                                      why they are like that 😞

                                      J This user is from outside of this forum
                                      J This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #26

                                      Because JavaScript and its complete absence of a standard library is a horrible abomination that should've been put out of our misery years ago.

                                      B 1 Reply Last reply
                                      17
                                      • J [email protected]

                                        Because JavaScript and its complete absence of a standard library is a horrible abomination that should've been put out of our misery years ago.

                                        B This user is from outside of this forum
                                        B This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #27

                                        I can't understand how anyone looked at JavaScript, worked with it for a bit, then decided they wanted to use it to build full applications.

                                        S U 2 Replies Last reply
                                        11
                                        • B [email protected]

                                          I can't understand how anyone looked at JavaScript, worked with it for a bit, then decided they wanted to use it to build full applications.

                                          S This user is from outside of this forum
                                          S This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #28

                                          Imagine you went through the pain of learning it to make a web front end. You want to make back end things too, but they all require knowing different languages. You're not learning another language, learning this one was hard enough! Easier to keep using the same horrible language for everything, of course.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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