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No brainer

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Lemmy Shitpost
lemmyshitpost
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  • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]
    This post did not contain any content.
    heythisisnttheymca@lemmy.worldH This user is from outside of this forum
    heythisisnttheymca@lemmy.worldH This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote last edited by
    #115

    Control toasters, duh. I'm gonna survive the AI revolution

    1 Reply Last reply
    1
    • iavicenna@lemmy.worldI [email protected]

      I am pretty sure you can sell gravel soooo

      A This user is from outside of this forum
      A This user is from outside of this forum
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      wrote last edited by
      #116

      But this gravel is free.

      simplejack@lemmy.worldS hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zoneH 2 Replies Last reply
      4
      • U [email protected]

        3 is overpowered, it's basically FTL if the reload time is low

        M This user is from outside of this forum
        M This user is from outside of this forum
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        wrote last edited by
        #117

        Yeah teleporting 7 in if there's no time like between teleportations is godlike.

        1 Reply Last reply
        3
        • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]
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          logicaldrivel@sopuli.xyzL This user is from outside of this forum
          logicaldrivel@sopuli.xyzL This user is from outside of this forum
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          wrote last edited by [email protected]
          #118

          I want to say free gravel, but I need to know how its manifested. In a big pile where I want it? Or like never ending handfuls of pocket gravel?

          S explodicle@sh.itjust.worksE ivanafterall@lemmy.worldI 3 Replies Last reply
          15
          • L [email protected]

            I feel like everyone is underestimating 5. It's any toaster. Make a killer robot that happens to have the ability to make toast and you've got a remote control death bot.

            I'd make a whole set of devices that happen to also be toasters. Why not add some heating elements and springs to an elevator, a car, a plane?

            S This user is from outside of this forum
            S This user is from outside of this forum
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            wrote last edited by
            #119

            Yeah, you could hook up a sensor to detect the toaster coming on and basically control electronics with your mind.

            1 Reply Last reply
            2
            • I This user is from outside of this forum
              I This user is from outside of this forum
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              wrote last edited by
              #120

              There was nothing that said you can't teleport up. Meaning you can go up and over. Almost no effort way of getting our of traffic or cleaning the gutters, fixing things up high. Or ya know essentially low flight. This is all assuming there is no cool down and its like walking.

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              3
              • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]
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                M This user is from outside of this forum
                M This user is from outside of this forum
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                wrote last edited by
                #121

                Toaster control for sure. After selling my robot toasters as a cheap way to communicate with satellites, I'll command an army of them all over the solar system.

                1 Reply Last reply
                4
                • D [email protected]
                  1. Sheer horror. You'll never be able to eat these again.
                  2. This has been brought up before. Gravel isn't cheap. This is basically infinite money.
                  3. If used continuously, you're basically The Flash.
                  4. Just a bad idea unless you can put it inside your existing nose for double the sniff-sensitivity.
                  5. Okay, that's just fun.
                  6. Again, used continuously, this is the fountain of youth. You'll still die of old age though.
                  7. Only useful under very specific circumstances. Also, define a "container".
                  8. Unless the Khitan civilization knew things we don't, this isn't useful at all.
                  9. Fast as he is now or when he was alive?
                  P This user is from outside of this forum
                  P This user is from outside of this forum
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                  wrote last edited by
                  #122

                  I'm thinking that #7 might be useful in certain policing or security positions, depending on the definition of empty (there's always dust and air).

                  Got a bunch of containers that need to be inspected? You can cross the ones you can see through off the list.

                  Also useful for winning the cup-and-ball game

                  D 1 Reply Last reply
                  2
                  • A [email protected]

                    I'm 10 hours younger (5 seconds later) , I'm 19 hours 59 minutes and 55 seconds younger, rinse and repeat until you reach your desired age. Immortality?

                    P This user is from outside of this forum
                    P This user is from outside of this forum
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                    wrote last edited by
                    #123

                    But you're not actually losing age in this one, just looking 10 hours younger so it wouldn't really stack.

                    A 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • A [email protected]

                      But this gravel is free.

                      simplejack@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                      simplejack@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
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                      wrote last edited by
                      #124

                      Not when I’m through with it.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      5
                      • S This user is from outside of this forum
                        S This user is from outside of this forum
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                        wrote last edited by
                        #125

                        Could be useful, but it says nowhere that your clothes will teleport with you.

                        J explodicle@sh.itjust.worksE 2 Replies Last reply
                        3
                        • P [email protected]

                          But you're not actually losing age in this one, just looking 10 hours younger so it wouldn't really stack.

                          A This user is from outside of this forum
                          A This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote last edited by
                          #126

                          Oh dang. You'd still die from old age.

                          amputret@lemmy.dbzer0.comA 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]

                            Okay. Your power instantly doesn't work as every case contains a placard saying what the dollar amount is and is therefore not an empty container

                            U This user is from outside of this forum
                            U This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote last edited by
                            #127

                            Still works with street gamblers though unless air is considered content as well

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • A [email protected]

                              Oh dang. You'd still die from old age.

                              amputret@lemmy.dbzer0.comA This user is from outside of this forum
                              amputret@lemmy.dbzer0.comA This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote last edited by
                              #128

                              Yeah, but you’d still be hot.

                              P 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • bamboodpanda@lemmy.worldB [email protected]

                                Free Gravel?

                                This one is clearly the best choice. That shit is expensive!

                                Start a gravel business, destroy the competition, and create a gravel empire.

                                A This user is from outside of this forum
                                A This user is from outside of this forum
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                                wrote last edited by
                                #129

                                Cover the whole world in gravel!!! MWAHAHAHAHA

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                1
                                • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]
                                  This post did not contain any content.
                                  technotica@lemmy.worldT This user is from outside of this forum
                                  technotica@lemmy.worldT This user is from outside of this forum
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                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #130

                                  Free gravel sounds great, but nowhere is the amount specified, if you get a handful of gravel every day for life that's not helpful.

                                  Teleport 7 inches sounds good, if the effect of the pill isn't a one time thing. Do you only teleport 7 inches when digesting the pill? Do you keep teleporting? Can you stop teleporting? 😉

                                  D ivanafterall@lemmy.worldI 2 Replies Last reply
                                  9
                                  • D [email protected]

                                    I imagine this working in a monkey's paw kind of way. First, the local gravel suppliers just keep mis-delivering things to places where you happen to be. Then they start talking and figure out how to get rid of you so you stop costing them so much business. You survive, skip town, only to start again. You get incredibly wealthy from re-selling all this free gravel. Eventually, mountaintops start dissapearing due to all the illegal quarrying going on...

                                    J This user is from outside of this forum
                                    J This user is from outside of this forum
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                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #131

                                    This is much easier to do the monkey paw routine by saying "you get one free piece of gravel per 100 years.:

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    2
                                    • N [email protected]

                                      The gravel one is gonna have some stupid loophole, like it's one pebble a day, but infinite and free.

                                      A This user is from outside of this forum
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                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #132

                                      Free gravel appears instantaneously at will, but only in the very center of Ohio

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      1
                                      • lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.caL [email protected]

                                        It does if trying to go through an 8” thick wall.

                                        tatterdemalion@programming.devT This user is from outside of this forum
                                        tatterdemalion@programming.devT This user is from outside of this forum
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                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #133

                                        No you just immerse in the wall for a femtosecond.

                                        S 1 Reply Last reply
                                        1
                                        • S [email protected]

                                          Thats honestly a very good thing to point out as well!

                                          Stairs, or hiking/walking on any kind of broken terrain... fucking snow, ice...

                                          Yep, there's a whole ton of more situations where a blink ability could be very practically useful.

                                          A This user is from outside of this forum
                                          A This user is from outside of this forum
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                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #134

                                          How many times have you been about to eat shit, and thought "If only I could fall an additional 7" and really just fuck my day up"

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