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  3. How to talk some sense into my daughter regarding a scam university?

How to talk some sense into my daughter regarding a scam university?

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  • S [email protected]

    My daughter (high school senior) really wants to go to this university next year. She’s a great student, she could easily attend a proper college if she wanted to, but she’s into the whole witchy hippie alternative thing. This college is a legit scam, even sold the main Washington campus due to financial issues this year. Each time I try to have a conversation about the cons with her the line is “daddy will take care of me”. My husband (daddy) always takes her side (will pay her full tuition and everything). She’s the biggest daddy’s girl I’ve ever known, but at this point this is just straight up enabling bad decisions.

    roofuskit@lemmy.worldR This user is from outside of this forum
    roofuskit@lemmy.worldR This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote last edited by
    #30

    Check how they got their accreditation. It's possible to just buy a struggling accredited school these days and just keep their accreditation and completely change the curriculum.

    Also ask them for employment and income statistics of their graduates. If they don't have them that's a red flag you can bring up.

    1 Reply Last reply
    7
    • S [email protected]

      The craziest part is that when I talk to him about it, he says he’d agree with me if our daughter was a son; but since she’s a girl what she studies/does professionally isn’t important as she should just do what she loves since “she can just find a good husband to take care of her”.

      roofuskit@lemmy.worldR This user is from outside of this forum
      roofuskit@lemmy.worldR This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote last edited by
      #31

      Wow, you married that kind of person?

      1 Reply Last reply
      8
      • H [email protected]

        100% agree this is a conversion with your husband. From the comments, what even is the point of her going to any college if theres a chance shell just drop out and stick you with debt and nothing to show for it?

        What I will say that diverges from most others is that while this school might be a scam, this aspect of the "wellness industry" has existed for millennia. Interest in holistic whatever isn't exactly a career death sentence. Your daughter might very well make good money selling herbs and crystals to wealthy white ladies.

        IMO, this is a conversion with your husband and then daughter asking her to sell you all on why she's going to college and for what. With the alternative being charging her rent or something else intended to have her leave the nest. She likely sees this school as having no accountability because as long as the checks clear, she'll be enrolled.

        S This user is from outside of this forum
        S This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote last edited by
        #32

        There won’t be any debt. As I mentioned, husband is paying in full for college.

        H 1 Reply Last reply
        2
        • K [email protected]

          I almost fell for something similar. Right before enrolling I decided to go on a deeper dive and I found ample evidence of it being a diploma mill without any value whatsoever. Saved me a lot of grief.

          T This user is from outside of this forum
          T This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote last edited by
          #33

          Dude two of the colleges I toured when I was a high schooler ended up shutting down and losing their accreditation. Only reason I didn't attend either of them was my parents told me they were too expensive and I was just a high schooler with zero concept of money who had yet to work at all (and honestly I had a bunch of other contributing problems but that's well outside of the scope of this discussion)

          1 Reply Last reply
          1
          • S [email protected]

            There won’t be any debt. As I mentioned, husband is paying in full for college.

            H This user is from outside of this forum
            H This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote last edited by
            #34

            OK, but so he's basically paying for adult day care if she quits before graduating?

            S 1 Reply Last reply
            11
            • C [email protected]

              Lmao, let her go, it'll be hilarious. You lot sound like real fun.

              trickdacy@lemmy.worldT This user is from outside of this forum
              trickdacy@lemmy.worldT This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote last edited by
              #35

              Always validating to see users live up to the tag I gave them

              1 Reply Last reply
              3
              • S [email protected]

                The craziest part is that when I talk to him about it, he says he’d agree with me if our daughter was a son; but since she’s a girl what she studies/does professionally isn’t important as she should just do what she loves since “she can just find a good husband to take care of her”.

                Z This user is from outside of this forum
                Z This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote last edited by
                #36

                "she can just find a good husband to take care of her”.

                He is still wrong then. He is about a thousand years too late with this view.

                1 Reply Last reply
                6
                • S [email protected]

                  My daughter (high school senior) really wants to go to this university next year. She’s a great student, she could easily attend a proper college if she wanted to, but she’s into the whole witchy hippie alternative thing. This college is a legit scam, even sold the main Washington campus due to financial issues this year. Each time I try to have a conversation about the cons with her the line is “daddy will take care of me”. My husband (daddy) always takes her side (will pay her full tuition and everything). She’s the biggest daddy’s girl I’ve ever known, but at this point this is just straight up enabling bad decisions.

                  7 This user is from outside of this forum
                  7 This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote last edited by
                  #37

                  Just let her attend. Pseudoscientific quackery, along with an elevated ego, lack of self-doubt, and the backup of a rich parent, are a certain way to make a whole fuckload of money.

                  R C bebopalouie@lemmy.caB atomicorange@lemmy.worldA 4 Replies Last reply
                  36
                  • H [email protected]

                    100% agree this is a conversion with your husband. From the comments, what even is the point of her going to any college if theres a chance shell just drop out and stick you with debt and nothing to show for it?

                    What I will say that diverges from most others is that while this school might be a scam, this aspect of the "wellness industry" has existed for millennia. Interest in holistic whatever isn't exactly a career death sentence. Your daughter might very well make good money selling herbs and crystals to wealthy white ladies.

                    IMO, this is a conversion with your husband and then daughter asking her to sell you all on why she's going to college and for what. With the alternative being charging her rent or something else intended to have her leave the nest. She likely sees this school as having no accountability because as long as the checks clear, she'll be enrolled.

                    J This user is from outside of this forum
                    J This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote last edited by
                    #38

                    Also you don’t need a degree to sell herbs and crystals.

                    H 1 Reply Last reply
                    10
                    • S [email protected]

                      My daughter (high school senior) really wants to go to this university next year. She’s a great student, she could easily attend a proper college if she wanted to, but she’s into the whole witchy hippie alternative thing. This college is a legit scam, even sold the main Washington campus due to financial issues this year. Each time I try to have a conversation about the cons with her the line is “daddy will take care of me”. My husband (daddy) always takes her side (will pay her full tuition and everything). She’s the biggest daddy’s girl I’ve ever known, but at this point this is just straight up enabling bad decisions.

                      J This user is from outside of this forum
                      J This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote last edited by
                      #39

                      What is the highest debt to income ratio?

                      T 1 Reply Last reply
                      1
                      • 7 [email protected]

                        Just let her attend. Pseudoscientific quackery, along with an elevated ego, lack of self-doubt, and the backup of a rich parent, are a certain way to make a whole fuckload of money.

                        R This user is from outside of this forum
                        R This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote last edited by
                        #40

                        Dammit. I hate it, but this is the smartest stupid answer.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        13
                        • J [email protected]

                          What is the highest debt to income ratio?

                          T This user is from outside of this forum
                          T This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote last edited by
                          #41

                          Debt incurred by students divided by their post-graduation salary. For conventional medical school, it's around 75%. Law school 35-40%. 688% is crazy.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          4
                          • J [email protected]

                            Also you don’t need a degree to sell herbs and crystals.

                            H This user is from outside of this forum
                            H This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote last edited by
                            #42

                            Yes, absolutely. I would worry more about the school trapping her in and endless moving goalposts to graduate situation. Unless they have a quantifiable and confirmed network or some benefit to graduates, it seems like a cash grab.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            6
                            • S [email protected]

                              My daughter (high school senior) really wants to go to this university next year. She’s a great student, she could easily attend a proper college if she wanted to, but she’s into the whole witchy hippie alternative thing. This college is a legit scam, even sold the main Washington campus due to financial issues this year. Each time I try to have a conversation about the cons with her the line is “daddy will take care of me”. My husband (daddy) always takes her side (will pay her full tuition and everything). She’s the biggest daddy’s girl I’ve ever known, but at this point this is just straight up enabling bad decisions.

                              humble_boatsman@sh.itjust.worksH This user is from outside of this forum
                              humble_boatsman@sh.itjust.worksH This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote last edited by
                              #43

                              She gonna have a hard time finding that trad-husband with 80k in bullshit student loans from a private college. And no real job prospects. You could suggest a nutritionists path at another university? My mother basically became the default bread winner with a nutritionists degree.

                              F 1 Reply Last reply
                              4
                              • H [email protected]

                                OK, but so he's basically paying for adult day care if she quits before graduating?

                                S This user is from outside of this forum
                                S This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote last edited by
                                #44

                                Essentially. And he’s cool with that apparently.

                                V H 2 Replies Last reply
                                5
                                • S [email protected]

                                  My daughter (high school senior) really wants to go to this university next year. She’s a great student, she could easily attend a proper college if she wanted to, but she’s into the whole witchy hippie alternative thing. This college is a legit scam, even sold the main Washington campus due to financial issues this year. Each time I try to have a conversation about the cons with her the line is “daddy will take care of me”. My husband (daddy) always takes her side (will pay her full tuition and everything). She’s the biggest daddy’s girl I’ve ever known, but at this point this is just straight up enabling bad decisions.

                                  P This user is from outside of this forum
                                  P This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #45

                                  Wow, this college reads like it literally provides negative educational value.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  8
                                  • C [email protected]

                                    Lmao, let her go, it'll be hilarious. You lot sound like real fun.

                                    P This user is from outside of this forum
                                    P This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #46

                                    Who upvotes this? Or are those just two alt accounts?

                                    C 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • S [email protected]

                                      The craziest part is that when I talk to him about it, he says he’d agree with me if our daughter was a son; but since she’s a girl what she studies/does professionally isn’t important as she should just do what she loves since “she can just find a good husband to take care of her”.

                                      P This user is from outside of this forum
                                      P This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote last edited by [email protected]
                                      #47

                                      Wow, I'm sorry that you married a major asshole.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      7
                                      • K [email protected]

                                        I almost fell for something similar. Right before enrolling I decided to go on a deeper dive and I found ample evidence of it being a diploma mill without any value whatsoever. Saved me a lot of grief.

                                        P This user is from outside of this forum
                                        P This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #48

                                        I wonder if the daughter in this case even knows what a diploma mill is.

                                        I mean, if you know that they exist, it has to be impossible to read anything about this place without immediately recognizing it as one... Right?

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        1
                                        • S [email protected]

                                          that's not flower power that's just misogyny! your husband has taught your daughter to be misogynistic towards herself. i think you need a long conversation with her, you need to disillusion her from the promises of "simplicity" of such worldview, because if anything happens to make her less than perfect for "a man like daddy" then she's going to be left helpless and unable to take care of herself in the long run. and even if she finds a man to take care of her - she will be then stuck with him no matter who he turns out to be

                                          princessnorah@lemmy.blahaj.zoneP This user is from outside of this forum
                                          princessnorah@lemmy.blahaj.zoneP This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #49

                                          I mean, hippies were actually a lot more misogynistic than people give them credit for.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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