Home owners of Lemmy do you have any advice on dealing with the stress of owning a home?

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Every drop of water, crack, ant, royally freaks me out at this point. I can't afford to rent. I own a shitty house that is a fixer upper. So frustrating.

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I'm in the same boat. Bought a home in 2020. It's been a constant stream of fixes and updates and replacements. My mortgage payments are high enough. Now we're dumping thousands of dollars on flood prevention, evestrough replacement, random leaky pipes, furnace cleaning, deck refinishing, grass and landscaping. Wife and I both work full-time. We are dipping into savings to upkeep our home. I totally regret it. Should have bought a 2-3bed condo instead. At least we could plan for the monthly condo fees and not worry about sudden emergency fixes. I don't know. I hate it.

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Not really much advice other than being proactive about issues, but it is funny how concerned you quickly become with all types of water once you own a home. Rain intrusion, drainage in the yard, leaky pipes, dripping noises, frozen pipes, gutters, humidity, water heater, storms, etc, etc. It's a real menace and so are squirrels (as I also found out after purchasing a home).

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Is this a typical feeling? I've been planning to buy a home soon....

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I solved this by selling my house and outsourcing all those bullshit problems to the landlord.

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Not for me. I... Don't have leaks? I know where my water shutoff is if I need it.

I like owning.

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Yeah I don't know how I feel about neighbors. I have good neighbors, but they are about 20 feet from me in either direction.

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I have have pretty bad anxiety. So it may me just me.

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All this is part of the game. What you save on not paying a landlord you pay in time keeping up with the place. Every ant and water drip is a challenge that you get to learn about fixing and make it your own. We're all lucky we live in a time where you can learn how to do anything from the internet.

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I pulled the hydrometer out of my cigar humidor to became more aware of the dampness of my basement. I also spent over $1,000 on evicting a family of raccoons out from under my backyard deck. So yeah, I get it HAH

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Not easy but have enough surplus to cover those things.

Also try to remember all the mortgage you're paying you'll most likely get back when you sell, unlike when you rent.

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i see repairing my house as a money saving hobby, got lots of plumbing, drywall, lumber, electrical, network, and car repair tools in the shed, garage and laundry room. i prefer to watch a diy vid on yt than any fiction, i guess my frugality drive me

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how concerned you quickly become with all types of water

LOL, yes! 99% of my problems these last 5 years have been related to water. It's really made me want to learn more about plumbing.

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Get handy. Fix things before they go bad, and learn basic construction on the way. Second hand tools are cheap, and there's a number of good youtubers to help in any situation. After you get your bearings, it turns into a fun way to make the place into what you want it to be. Nothing is terribly difficult, and materials can be had cheap if you're not in an emergency. Facebook marketplace allowed my to build a house for 70k over two years, and it's valued at 350k, and not finished yet. The experience gained led me to doing odd side jobs and reselling unused materials to keep paying for new additions. If you can replace your own water heater, you can replace someone elses for half the price of Lowes and still take home 700$ for three hours work.
Pick up some resold tile and put in a bathroom wall. You'll find out what you did wrong in your own bathroom and won't mess up someone elses for some extra cash in a pinch.

Electrical work is my favorite. Know the code, and how to stay safe, and it's a lot of fun that the average person is HORRIFIED of. Get a good electricians multitool, a current tester, a drill and some tape, and you can perform miracles.

Most people will never afford a house. You don't have to fix it, you get to fix it, so take pride and make it somewhere you love to live.

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And the more you open up to fix the more systemic problems you find. In an old/fixer house. Try to pick one project at a time. Spend some money when u have too. Have seen some smart people locate home improvement grants for upgrades/HVAC. You'll need to spend money. No avoiding it. In a couple years you'll forget how bad it all seemed and get used to the minor annoyances you haven't gotten too. And don't forget to learn some things. Buy a bug pump sprayer and specific chemicals on line. Learn how important gutters are and getting storm water away from the foundations. Get some rugs to cover the gaps and caulk the cracks. Most importantly A good partner for the decorating to make u forget it's a shitty house no matter how much work you put in

To answer your question I just drink a lot.

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I learned to fix it. Before YouTube, that usually means not so great. But now, I usually do at least as good as a job as the people I'd hire.

Fixing stuff is easy, and you have to accept that there's no perfect fix.

Ants, set out ant bait traps. Look outside and see if there's a trail, follow it to the source, and spray it with ant poison.

Cracks, YouTube that. They may be nothing.

Leaks, if it's plumbing, you can buy pipes at home Depot and replace them.

Granted, it will take a while. Maybe all day. But you'll get an endorphin rush when it's done and eventually you'll come to know all the ins and outs of your house.

But it's you look at it and it's too big, Google a company to do it. Even if you're halfway, and find you're stuck. No shame in getting help. This shines you don't have a family member or friend who's already handy.

But really, if you can't fix it, can't afford to have it fixed, just do what you can to keep the house clean and work on it a little bit or put aside money till you can. That's hard, but that's owning a house. Like anything in life, it's difficult. But it doesn't have to stay that way, with enough time and practice.

You're already smarter than many, asking for other's opinions. Don't suffer in silence. I believe in you!

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This is absolutely normal when you first buy the place. I bought my place in 2017 and was super anxious over the first year because I suddenly had basically no savings and all my equity was in this building. I didn't know anything about home repair and couldn't afford to hire someone who did.

The thought of something going wrong enough that it would ruin the place gave me an anxiety attack more than once.

Then, after a couple years and a few things needing fixed, I realized that things don't go wrong that often and most of the time if they do, they are easy to fix.

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I think it really depends on the home, get an inspection to try to see some of the problems beforehand and you won't be caught too off guard.

For me water is the biggest thing, water in the basement, water through the roof, water by the window sills, it never ends! Every expense seems to be another 5k or 20k, owning a fixer upper is an expensive endeavor

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Try to only tackle one project at a time. It gets exponentially more stressful trying to juggle a bunch of incomplete projects. Also, you'll never be "done". That's not the point. The point is shelter and comfort.

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Best response in the thread lol

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Home owners of Lemmy do you have any advice on dealing with the stress of owning a home?