Anon is rude at work
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This is meme has a bad implied advise. You have to interact with your coworkers in so far as you build working relationship to trust each other, because teamwork and professionalism is required in most jobs. Also, building a work friendly relationship with coworkers will pay off when you want to get promotion or recognition, because you will get good word of mouth from colleagues and thus build a good reputation.
I understand where people are coming from with this, but one has to balance knowing when to recognise if your workmates can be trusted and become good friends, or knowing how to keep professional but friendly distance. Unless you work in an environment where teamwork has less importance, or you don't plan to move up the corporate ladder which requires good reputation, or really don't want to make friends with colleagues because they are toxic, then by all means be "rude".
I fall into "rude coworker" territory, but have managed to do really well in my career. Different groups at my company have requested me to move to them, was just promoted to Expert in my software product, and actually just got offered a job with a 30% raise by one of the clients I work with (which I ultimately accepted and start next month).
My secret is that I'm a hard worker and I'm very thorough with everything I do. I take mentoring others seriously, and although I'm not naturally a very patient person, I am always patient with my coworkers and clients.
You don't have to be good at socializing to climb your way up, but you do have to make up for it by actually being good at your job.
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When you’re trying to be friendly with a coworker and they say “we’re coworkers not friends” that’s pretty fucking rude IMO. The other ones though never bothered me.
wrote last edited by [email protected]Obviously don't SAY that out loud.
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This is meme has a bad implied advise. You have to interact with your coworkers in so far as you build working relationship to trust each other, because teamwork and professionalism is required in most jobs. Also, building a work friendly relationship with coworkers will pay off when you want to get promotion or recognition, because you will get good word of mouth from colleagues and thus build a good reputation.
I understand where people are coming from with this, but one has to balance knowing when to recognise if your workmates can be trusted and become good friends, or knowing how to keep professional but friendly distance. Unless you work in an environment where teamwork has less importance, or you don't plan to move up the corporate ladder which requires good reputation, or really don't want to make friends with colleagues because they are toxic, then by all means be "rude".
Also, building a work friendly relationship with coworkers will pay off when you want to get promotion or recognition, because you will get good word of mouth from colleagues and thus build a good reputation.
Haha, yeah, and just look them in the eye and give them a firm handshake!
Meanwhile, in modern life, the way to get promoted and better paid is job hopping, or starting on your own.
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Only those who have nothing else in their lives but work find this unfriendly. Work is not an event that I attend voluntarily, but to earn a living. I am polite, nice and helpful to my colleagues in everything that revolves around work. Anything beyond that is not a matter of course and should not be taken for granted.
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Man... it's so weird.
They want to have Friday beers in the office. They want to go to the game together. They want to organize little events after work that I'm semi-obligated to go to. I went to one, reluctantly, and one of the executives more or less made it clear to me that he had been against hiring me in the first place (for understandable reasons).
No I don't like you people, you're pod people, why the fuck do you do this with your lives
Edit: It wasn't just me, either. They all would get excited for sandwiches from this one place, and I went with them one time and they all clearly thought it was a treat, and the sandwich was foul. Just a big stinky wad of toppings and condiments. I never went again, and every so often with some fanfare they would go there again. I literally don't know what's wrong with them.
I'm self employed, which means I get to avoid the vast majority of these events. Unfortunately it also means that them inviting me is a Big Deal, and saying no isn't really an option.
One company did a quarterly outing to a brewery. Now, ignoring it's a bad idea to get drunk with coworkers (and then drive home), they only had IPAs, and I loathe IPAs. And they had "BBQ" which rivalled the mediocreest microwave leftovers.
And they claimed to love it. Either they're huge liars, or have horrible taste. But I did note only about a third of their employees were there at the time.
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I basically agree with all but the coworkers not friends thing. You spend a fuckton of basically everyday with these people - you need to make it not a living hell for everybody, and the only people who ever say this shit are the most hostile, passive aggressive, self centered, backstabbing, anti-competitive, two-faced people you'll ever meet.
Like sure you don't have to give each oral and have lunch together, but, christ, don't be such cutthroat selfish pricks to each other, that's what the billionaires want.
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I fall into "rude coworker" territory, but have managed to do really well in my career. Different groups at my company have requested me to move to them, was just promoted to Expert in my software product, and actually just got offered a job with a 30% raise by one of the clients I work with (which I ultimately accepted and start next month).
My secret is that I'm a hard worker and I'm very thorough with everything I do. I take mentoring others seriously, and although I'm not naturally a very patient person, I am always patient with my coworkers and clients.
You don't have to be good at socializing to climb your way up, but you do have to make up for it by actually being good at your job.
I take mentoring others seriously, and although I'm not naturally a very patient person, I am always patient with my coworkers and clients.
This is what I mean. You have to have "people's skills" because it is important in a job where teamwork and mentoring are required. You don't have to socialise on every company events or be friends with coworkers outside of work. But being professional and friendly goes a long way. I know of people who may be good at their jobs on technical level, but are bad with managing people because they lack both social skills and social intelligence, which makes them pass over for promotions.
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Also, building a work friendly relationship with coworkers will pay off when you want to get promotion or recognition, because you will get good word of mouth from colleagues and thus build a good reputation.
Haha, yeah, and just look them in the eye and give them a firm handshake!
Meanwhile, in modern life, the way to get promoted and better paid is job hopping, or starting on your own.
You could only get away so much with job hopping. And besides, I have job hopped before, adjusting to new working culture and environment can be challenging and eventually drain you as a person.
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You could only get away so much with job hopping. And besides, I have job hopped before, adjusting to new working culture and environment can be challenging and eventually drain you as a person.
You could only get away so much with job hopping.
Really? Because that's not been my experience at all. You can even come back to the same company multiple times. Sometimes it's even easier since you "know the company already".
adjusting to new working culture and environment can be challenging and eventually drain you as a person.
I guess that's a personal thing. I don't experience that at all, but if you feel the need to personally reconnect to all your coworkers, I can see why it would be very draining. If you see your coworkers as coworkers, it's a lot easier.
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I basically agree with all but the coworkers not friends thing. You spend a fuckton of basically everyday with these people - you need to make it not a living hell for everybody, and the only people who ever say this shit are the most hostile, passive aggressive, self centered, backstabbing, anti-competitive, two-faced people you'll ever meet.
Like sure you don't have to give each oral and have lunch together, but, christ, don't be such cutthroat selfish pricks to each other, that's what the billionaires want.
wrote last edited by [email protected]Friends are people I like, share hobbies and interests with and want to have around me in my life. I picked my friends myself and I'm proud and happy with them.
Coworkers are people I'm stuck in a room with 40 hours a week. Of course you should be polite and friendly, because you're stuck with them. They got foisted on me and dealing with is part of why I get paid.
There's a huge difference between "not a living hell" and "sharing my private life and feelings". If everyone is professional and polite, that's great, but I dislike quite a lot of the people I work with and wouldn't spend 10 minutes with them if I didn't get paid for it.
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Friends are people I like, share hobbies and interests with and want to have around me in my life. I picked my friends myself and I'm proud and happy with them.
Coworkers are people I'm stuck in a room with 40 hours a week. Of course you should be polite and friendly, because you're stuck with them. They got foisted on me and dealing with is part of why I get paid.
There's a huge difference between "not a living hell" and "sharing my private life and feelings". If everyone is professional and polite, that's great, but I dislike quite a lot of the people I work with and wouldn't spend 10 minutes with them if I didn't get paid for it.
wrote last edited by [email protected]I fully agree with most of what you’re saying. But I also have many close friends who started out as coworkers, but we found out we’re enjoying each other’s company.
Hell I’m crashing on a former colleague’s (and former boss’s even) couch right now, and another colleague in the same city offered theirs. Another ex coworker is my deepest confidant in just about any topic.
It’s a bit tricky to find out which people are worth deepening the relationship with, and how to cordially avoid the others. But that’s just like everywhere else tbh.
Edit: I wanna add it’s perfectly fine to keep your distance to people from work, as long as you’re not being an asshole. I know I would have missed out on great seemingly lifetime friendships with that attitude and I don’t recommend not joining this seemingly cool person for a drink after work for the sole reason that you work together.
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This post did not contain any content.wrote last edited by [email protected]
"Doesn't talk unless spoken to " is fine if you don't want to talk about you private life but if it is work related you need to speak up when it's necessary. Otherwise some co-workers start taking credit for shit you've done. Not to mention if you don't build some rapport with co-workers good chance they don't recommend you for a promotion or a raise or something even if you do your job well. Not because they hate you or something just that they forgot what you do at work and it's your job to remind people of the work you've done and that only happens when you talk.
Also in large companies it's good to be in the loop of what's going on in the office, it's how you can sniff out an opportunity for a raise or promotion or know when to leave before the ship sinks. So socialize at least a bit at work, you can do that without talking much about your private life.
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None of those things are rude.
Correct, but refusal to engage in small talk, banter, discussing your lives, and the occasional social outing, will have many see you as stand offish, asocial, and your refusal to do this basic community building stuff, as being rude.
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I never trust the 'spends lunch break in car' types. First one I ran into was listening to Rush Deadbaugh and the second was talking to god or something.
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Only those who have nothing else in their lives but work find this unfriendly. Work is not an event that I attend voluntarily, but to earn a living. I am polite, nice and helpful to my colleagues in everything that revolves around work. Anything beyond that is not a matter of course and should not be taken for granted.
A lot of that is going to be job specific. If you isolate yourself, you could run into various problems. First, you probably won't be communicating with union members, and those members might be the kind of people who can help you if the bosses try to fuck you over. Second, sometimes work is stressful, and you might want support from people who technically have no duty to help you. If you treat them decently on a somewhat regular basis, they might make time for you even if they don't need to. This also connects with your friends. It depends on your relationships of course, but some friends don't want to hear about work complaints. If that's the bulk of your friends, then you might want coworkers who are willing to listen to work complaints.
And it's all nice and fine to say that you only attend work to earn a living, but the reality is you could have worked at a dozen places, and you chose a specific one. No one's forcing you to be there. You could have gotten a job at 7-Eleven or Walmart, but you didn't. You're there of your own volition.
I don't think anyone takes for granted halfway decent co-workers. We've all worked with total jerks, and people often have natural reasons to act like total jerks from time to time. If you're one of them, that's okay, you do you.
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I feel like if you are friendly with your co-workers it makes the days go by faster.
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Someone on linkedin made that meme.
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If we try to talk to coworkers we are told to get back to work, but then I'm expected to show up to extra events and get drunk with people I usually am not even allowed to talk to? No thanks, why are they surprised by this?
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I don't mind grabbing a beer with coworkers after work, but that's it. In work I'd rather have my mind somewhere else.
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When you’re trying to be friendly with a coworker and they say “we’re coworkers not friends” that’s pretty fucking rude IMO. The other ones though never bothered me.
Yeah, had one of those interactions, it felt horrible and that person exploded from me saying hi and some generic routine like how are you.
