What do you do when homeless folks ask for money?
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LMAO it literally is
Word for word lol
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Easy peasy until one pulls out a tap to pay terminal. I’ve seen it once, crazy world.
Good point. While I never had that happen …. Last winter I used it as an excuse not to hire some teens who were shoveling driveways. But they had Venmo. Dammit
I wasn’t even that unwilling: it’s mostlyvthey were too late. I was already out there and had already shoveled enough snow to get my snowblower out
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Probably is, but it also happened in my city. My city’s gone to meth in a real bad way.
Fair enough
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LMAO it literally is
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i actually give to those who do not ask
like a lady in the subway, visibly mentally challenged with all her belongings, drawing and
strikingwords in her notepad. she made me sad, so i gave her a bill when leaving the train. her face became lightened when she saw it, she said thank you and I leftsometimes I leave at where they sleep like under pillow next to head
wrote last edited by [email protected]This is a great idea. Some of us are wary of being ripped off by a scammer and there are some of those. But those few scammers will likely be the most aggressive. Someone just existing in need will NOT be a scammer. This seems like a great way to be sure you’re actually helping someone who needs it
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Right, I feel like a total ass ignoring them because its just mean. But I also feel like if youre too friendly they think you're an easy person to rob as well...and im not a scary looking person. If i was it would help
Interestingly the only time I had a homeless guy threatening me he was actually interested in my dog and he may not have actually been intentionally threatening.
When he asked to pet my dog, I said ok but to take it slow and easy because she was a rescue that didn’t trust people. He proceeded to spent like ten minutes saying he wasn’t worried because he had a knife.
I probably should have taken it much more seriously but this was a festival with people and police all over ….. and my dog is pretty good at scaring people
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I wonder if the people saying they give money every time live in major cities (and walk often).
If I gave a quarter to everyone who asked me for change, I'd be out over $200 per year. Double that if they're still going to ask me on my way back (which is likely).
Some of them would also be rolling their eyes at a quarter. Some panhandlers can even become aggressive if they don't like what they get.
I'm not going to say that these people are going to waste the money on drugs, though some will (and I don't care what they do with the money, really). But I'd rather...
- Donate that money to food banks and other causes
- Not carry around unnecessary change
- Not risk pulling out my wallet in the city (in case I forget to keep the change handy)
- And NOT turn city sidewalks into tolled walkways for people who can't afford a car
As for what I do? I do the hand thing and apologize. I make eye contact (or at least look their way). If they ask again, I tell them I don't have anything. There's no reason to feel shame for not giving. Like someone else said, it's a numbers game.
If there are regulars and people who are genuinely down on their luck, then (if you have the time and willingness), you could talk to them, and maybe offer to buy them food or something.
Of course, there's always the chance that they'll bring the food back and ask for a refund. But hey, they would've used your $20 the same way.
Plus there’s the problem of literally giving them a quarter. I used to empty my pockets out for the first person I saw on my way out of work. But too often they would just throw change on the ground and get mad.
I get that they hoped for more but it is something and is what I hsd
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Where I live, there isn’t much walking, but the homeless stand at intersections and hold signs and look at you while you wait on the light to change.
My wife, who is a much better person than I, will keep $5 McDonald’s gift cards in her vehicle and sometimes hand those out. She says that there is a McDonald’s within walking distance of almost anywhere in town, and that $5 is enough to get a couple of things off the value menu and a free cup of water. If they’re really homeless and hungry, at least they will have something to eat.
wrote last edited by [email protected]Where I live, the local paper did an expose about some of those people being scammers. Most are truly in need and deserve any help we can give. But you need to be more skeptical of the most aggressive or the ones with the best spots. There’s only a small number of scammers but they will drive away the truly needy when they can find a profitable intersection
I like the one guy here with a practice of giving only to those who aren’t actively panhandling.
But that reminds me, it’s been too long since I donated to services for the needy
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This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.
I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.
I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.
Its tough.
I don't really carry cash due to devaluation of currency in my country(our biggest banknote can buy 1 kg of chicken as a reference) but I typically carry some biscuits with me, so I'd offer it.
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This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.
I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.
I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.
Its tough.
wrote last edited by [email protected]Ignore and donate to a local shelter and/or kitchen. Do not encourage street harassment. I know it sucks and I know a lot of people are hurting. But community aid should not be divided based on who is the loudest, most aggressive, or most "convincingly in need" based on appearance. (If someone is hungry or thirsty by all means hook up the people in need in your community, never hurts to share food and water)
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This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.
I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.
I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.
Its tough.
If I have cash, I'll give it. I don't give a shit whether they're being honest or not. My generosity is not tempered by the dishonesty of others.
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If I have cash, I'll give it. I don't give a shit whether they're being honest or not. My generosity is not tempered by the dishonesty of others.
Okay, but the money you gave could have been used to provide community kitchen and shelters. Should community aid be given in cash based on peoples willingness to look convincingly in need? Should assertive street harassment be the default choice to get aid? Everytime you're tempted to give cash, give that much to a local shelter or kitchen.
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This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.
I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.
I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.
Its tough.
My wife & I were going into a restaurant one afternoon, and there was a man in a wheelchair with no legs below the knee sitting next door at the exit to Walmart. His sign said that he was a homeless vet. As we started in, I told my wife to hold on, and I ran over and gave him $20. When I got back, my wife said, "Did you just give that guy 20 bucks?" I said, "Yep, why?" She said, "You know he's just going to spend it on alcohol." I said, "I hope so, the guy ain't got no legs, let him have a good drink!"
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This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.
I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.
I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.
Its tough.
I give whatever change I have, but when that's gone:
"Sorry. I get paid electronically and pay for damn near everything electronically, the only time I touch cash I have to pay extra to get it."
now I have been hit with the: can you venmo me five?
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Okay, but the money you gave could have been used to provide community kitchen and shelters. Should community aid be given in cash based on peoples willingness to look convincingly in need? Should assertive street harassment be the default choice to get aid? Everytime you're tempted to give cash, give that much to a local shelter or kitchen.
when community aid doesn't actually aid the community - we have lots of shelters with rules against pets, couples, drinking etc., - religious orgs primarily who want to force their values on the victims.
Everytime you’re tempted to give cash, give that much to a local shelter or kitchen.
I disagree, there's something to be said for helping individuals when you can. And there are lots of individuals who will not seek institutional aid for a number of valid reasons.
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Plus there’s the problem of literally giving them a quarter. I used to empty my pockets out for the first person I saw on my way out of work. But too often they would just throw change on the ground and get mad.
I get that they hoped for more but it is something and is what I hsd
Especially in Canada. A quarter can't get you much of anything. You'd need 5 of them to get yourself the cheapest coffee. Probably more than one for a single piece of fruit, even.
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In the northeastern U.S. I've mostly learned to acknowledge them, don't give anything, and move on with my life.
Not sure if it's bad luck or what, but nearly every time I've tried to be nice and offer them something it always backfires. I'll be passing by with some food and they'll ask me for some, I give them some and then they tell me it wasn't enough and to give them all the food I was carrying. Like WTF?
Another time I actually had some change on me so I gave him some and he said it wasn't enough money and started following me, wanted me to go to an ATM so I can take out more money for him. I was forced to tell him to stop following me or I'd have to call the cops.
I have even more stories like that.. going through those motions repeatedly it feels like the homeless have taught me not to give to the homeless. But hopefully your experiences have better outcomes.
Dude, same happened to me. One guy threw the box of food he asked me to give him in a bush because he didn’t like Italian. Another told me to go to an atm for him. The last time I gave someone money they had me absolutely convinced that they needed $10 for the bus ride home. Before I even put my wallet away he was saying the same thing to the next guy.
Decided to stop that and donate to charity instead, even though money was tight. After my $20 donation they flooded my mailbox asking for more donations. They even sent me $5 with the message “This $5 could save a life!” So sick of being made into a fool for wanting to help.
If I were convinced a person truly needed help I could provide, I would straight up be willing to give them at least $1000. I simply don’t trust the pleas any more. Have to keep it limited to chance encounters with everyday people.
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My wife & I were going into a restaurant one afternoon, and there was a man in a wheelchair with no legs below the knee sitting next door at the exit to Walmart. His sign said that he was a homeless vet. As we started in, I told my wife to hold on, and I ran over and gave him $20. When I got back, my wife said, "Did you just give that guy 20 bucks?" I said, "Yep, why?" She said, "You know he's just going to spend it on alcohol." I said, "I hope so, the guy ain't got no legs, let him have a good drink!"
I heard that story once on reddit tho. Are you just saying a story, or was it you?
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I wonder if the people saying they give money every time live in major cities (and walk often).
Honestly there's panhandlers then there's homeless. I get asked for money surprisingly few amounts of times from homeless and I usually throw them $5-10 every time if I have cash.
Frequent panhandlers I will never give money to. If you're around the area a lot it's pretty easy to know the difference.
That's a great point. There are also a lot of career panhandlers where I live. Like, "getting picked up in fancy SUVs" career panhandlers.
I hope they're just scam artists and not victims of human trafficking.
Which raises another point -- sometimes giving money to people in the streets is supporting human trafficking.
You have to really know who your money is going to. And 9 times out of 10, I'd wager the money is better off being donated to services that support people in need than it is going into a takeout coffee cup at the end of a stretched out arm.
But food is still probably a great help no matter what, even if it is for a victim of human trafficking. Everyone needs to eat.
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This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can't be giving out 20's to everyone who asks.
I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say "oh no, I donate to services that help the needy" because that person isn't necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.
I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to "get rid of them" but im not supporting that at all.
Its tough.
I don't carry cash, so that's an easy answer.
