Suggestions for my next distro

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Ubuntu should be able to. They even have some sort of kernel hot patching service I have not used.

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i will add a question to theirs: Why is Fedora not in the suggestions?

i'm only interested in negative criticism, if you please. What made you avoid or stop using Fedora?

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Gentoo! Of course!

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I have daily driven (a) Fedora(-based distro) ever since I started using Linux. So I'm absolutely biased towards it. However, as Fedora is a semi-rolling release distro that really likes offline updates that involves a reboot, it simply falls flat when it comes to satisfying OP's needs. They would have a very similar experience to their current one with openSUSE Tumbleweed, the very same they actively want to get rid of.

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That requires reboots to update.
Nothing against Aurora, I might run my customized version of it new systems, but any system update requires you reboot the device.

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I'm using MX Linux AHS on my PC for years, it is my work PC, 40h/week, for 3 years now, 0 problem with it, no systemd, no flatpak, no snap, and using Xfce is so nice

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I never really got on with Slackware, but I might give it another shot...

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Three reasons for me:

DNF can be kinda slow
Fedora is owned by Red Hat, which is owned by IBM, which is American and also assisted the Axis powers during WWII.
SELinux was created by the NSA. I know it's FOSS, but I don't feel I can trust any three-letter agency.

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Might even be worth checking if https://github.com/NixOS/nixos-hardware has a straight-up fix for the issue.

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Fedora isn't owned by Red Hat. It is a community-driven distro which Red Hat uses as a base for RHEL.
And you aren't a paying customer. You can use Fedora without giving a single cent, or any telemetry data, to Red Hat.
Your stance is like saying "I'm not taking this free bread roll, because people I don't like also eat bread rolls."

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If youre coming on Nixos, I have a lot of resources in the bookmarks section here: https://codeberg.org/BlastboomStrice/LinuxPlan/src/branch/main/LinuxPlan.md#nixos-bookmarks

(This was a guide I made for myself in the span of ~4months to transition to linux and I still update it some times.)

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When I turn it on, it bootloops unless it's connected to power when I press the button.

Have you tried updating your BIOS?

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If you can boot from USB, I'd look at Ventoy, which will let you put multiple distro ISOs on a single USB stick and then pick one of them to boot from when you boot up. I linked to a tutorial rather than the project page for a quick review.

It could be that OpenSUSE is contributing to your boot issues, and that one of the other distros may have a kernel and configuration that plays more nicely; Ventoy will help you determine this. It'll also let you play with several distros without having to install all of them, and see if you like one more than another.

If your boot problem is hardware related - either an issue with the hardware itself, or just Linux compatability, then you should stay away from rolling release distros like Arch; while you can configure them to minimize reboots, they're managed in such a way as to expect people to upgrade frequently, including the kernel, which requires reboots. For example, I run Arch and I love it, but I also tend to not upgrade it very often and the longer between upgrades, the greater the chance of something going wrong during an update. It's absolutely the least dependency-hellish distro I've used if you update frequently, but something like Debian is better if you're looking for long uptimes.

TL;DR: use Ventoy and try several distros. If you find that your boot problems persist through several distros, ignore rolling-release distros like Arch, Alpine, and Void, and focus on Debian-derived distros like Debian, Ubuntu, or Mint. Or you can try a Redhat derivative, but I hate RPM with the fire of a thousand suns so I'd recommend that last - still, some obviously insane people like it, and it's an option.

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The boot issue is definitely hardware related. The machine doesn't even power on the display before restarting.

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That's a good idea. Why didn't I think of that?

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Ah, I stand corrected.

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Ubuntu or something based on it

I would not recommend ubuntu, specially on this case. System updates, snapd mostly, have gone downhill and it's nearly impossible to avoid reboots for extended periods. Debian seems to be still as solid as it's always been.

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[https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fedora_Project#Governance]("The Fedora Project is not a separate legal entity or organization; Red Hat retains liability for its actions.")

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Sure, I was just expanding on OP's Kinoite comment.

Aurora can however go weeks or months without a reboot (you don't HAVE to update), so that's still ok.

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"The Fedora Project is not a separate legal entity or organization; Red Hat retains liability for its actions."

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Suggestions for my next distro