short
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Short people will not go to heaven.
Well, obviously. They can't reach.
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If drinking alcohol prohibits you from going to heaven, all the church goers who practice communion are fucked.
Well, it's supposed to transmogrify into (human) flesh and blood once it gets in your mouth.
Alcohol might be a no-no, but cannibalism is apparently a-ok.
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Short people will not go to heaven.
Well, obviously. They can't reach.
Short people got no reason to live
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Overcook chicken? Believe it or not, also no heaven
Did you ever pet a dog the wrong direction and make their hair all scrunchified? Also no heaven.
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Short people got no reason to live
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Pardon, what? Not saying you're wrong but this sounds like something that can't be proved. I would love a source if you don't mind!
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Nobody will go to heaven because heaven is not real.
how can you tell someone anonymous online is an atheist?
they'll let you know
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But Epstein was on Santa's list.
well if anyone deserved a lump of coal
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When I got my first tattoo 30 years ago, my then mother-in-law said I'd be in prison soon enough. So far I've managed to be a good citizen (it seems following the law is easy), but I've got a plan for this to prove her right. When I'm about to go bye bye , I'm going to strip naked and run around on live TV, probably at a sporting event. That will at least get me arrested, and if I resist arrest and generally be annoying, I'm might go to prison to let the state pay for all the medical things associated with my demise. These tattoos are a bad influence. Hell awaits.
my mom said i'd go to prison if i got an electric bike and she's right. the local prison has a bike shop as part of their programs and i bought my bike there
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Nobody will go to heaven because heaven is not real.
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Not OP, but I didn't realize it was obscure lol
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Removed tattoos, just like lost limbs, will return when you enter Heaven.
my wife is happier without her lost organs just like i'm happier without my lost ones. please no.
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it's gonna be interesting when AI's start fighting each other. Think religious wars are nasty? Wait until agentic AI starts driving automated trucks into 'enemy' data centers....
electricity usage'll go down
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Someone said that hell probably really is the place to be. Heaven has mega rules to get in, and everyone else just crashes at Satan's place.
The torture for the true sinners probably happens, but at the hands of the normal people who didnt make it to heaven. Be honest with yourself, would you pass up the opportunity to ram a hot poker up Hitlers arse?
i mean yeah. that's so gauche. i'm gonna dunk him in the bee tank
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Removed tattoos, just like lost limbs, will return when you enter Heaven.
Ah, so when entering heaven, I'll get mind back?
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I asked if we could go to hell without tattoos:
in my belief system artwork is a gift and you should carefully adorn yourself. there's like two of us tho
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Define too much pork. Because pork loins are cheap af and pork shoulder is tasty af.
NO SUCH THING
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how can you tell someone anonymous online is an atheist?
they'll let you know
That's fallacious reasoning.
Not all religions believe in heaven.
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Did they pull that last bit from the Doors song?
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I gotta check that place out if I'm ever in the area.
