I ain't got no time to maintain some stupid little plastic bread clip. I got a landlord to feed.
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When I was a kid, we used to keep the plastic bags from bread once we ate the loaf and in winter we’d line our boots with them. To keep our socks dry.
🫢we just use waterproof shoes
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I can keep track of the clip for about 1/3 of the bread loaf... until the twist is long enough to tuck easily. Then, sometimes I'm even too put-upon to twist and I simply wrap and tuck.
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I use these
This is just a binder clip with more steps
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We've learned quite a bit about these Occlupanids thanks to the HORG:
wrote last edited by [email protected]Thank you for bringing me a small slice of the Old Internet, 1.0. I miss it, and its very specific websites, tremendously and frequently.
Kids, check it out. This should have been your inheritance.
Edit: spelling.
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Fuck the wire thing too
The wire thing always works.
Fuck the cardboard clip, you get one use out of that fucking thing.
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Yeah, but some of us don't want to go through a giant indoor hedge maze to get one.
are you describing a grocery store?
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Yeah, but some of us don't want to go through a giant indoor hedge maze to get one.
Is that how you think of your "random small appliance" drawer? Aka. The junk drawer of the kitchen.
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Am I the only one who spins it then sleeves it inside out back over the bread?
Not enough plastic for that until further along in the loaf...!?
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Yeah, but some of us don't want to go through a giant indoor hedge maze to get one.
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It's called an occlupanid, thank you.
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We've learned quite a bit about these Occlupanids thanks to the HORG:
That's a fun rabbit hole.
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Stores used to have this thin red tape for produce bags and it was almost impossible to remove the tape so you just mangled the bag
They still use those here. I don't bother with the tape. Just cut the bag.
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are you describing a grocery store?
It says IKEA on it.
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I just do a slip knot.
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I use these
Take your fowl magic elsewhere vvitch.
Also id probably lose 4 of these before giving up outright.
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🫢we just use waterproof shoes
All hail leather the best waterproofing!
Before anyone brings up cruelty of animal products don't worry, I would go full Texas chainsaw massacre for the sake of my own amusement. Y'all can't get through my red and brown morality!
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I spin the bag and then clip it shut because spinning it gives the bag an easy part to clip.
Spinning the bag is also fun. Sometimes I spin it more than necessary just to be silly
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I just do a slip knot.
I push my fingers into my eyes.
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Is…is that not what everyone's doing‽
That is what everyone is supposed to do, and yet...
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Me too, but there's a way to make the twists easier to use.
- Hold the open end of the bag and twist the loaf to make the twisted end
- Fold the wire in half around the twisted part of the bag
- Pinch the 2 ends of the wire with one hand and hold the open end of the bag with the other hand. The bread will hang below that like a Y.
- Swing the loaf of bread in a loop around your hands 2 or 3 times like you're making a ring with your arms and swinging the bread into it or out of it. That twists the wire around the bag.
I have to reread this way too many times to get an imagein my head
