That's basically torture

[the_picard_maneuver@lemmy.world]

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[pudutr0n@feddit.cl]

What good is the 200 million then

[tachyontele@lemm.ee]

If the width and the hight of the table... Hold on... Oh crap i already lost the money.

[deusumbra@lemmy.world]

Rogal Dorn, is that you?

[listless@lemmy.cringecollective.io]

maybe i'm a fool, but i think i might be able to do it...

[cmdr_horn@lemmy.world]

Order 200m worth of tables
demand 3 day delivery

[flamingo_pinyata@sopuli.xyz]

Hard dilemma ... Do you guarantee that the table will not change dimensions in those 2 days?
Needs some planning, there might be ways to avoid measuring a table for a while.

[zloubida@sh.itjust.works]

For a while, maybe, but two whole days?

[mhzawadi@lemmy.horwood.cloud]

Wait, you guys measure tables?

I just eat off them

[perishthethought@lemm.ee]

Worth a shot, eh?

[etherwhack@lemmy.world]

So no bananas for a couple days...

Sounds killer, but I'm up for the challenge

[southsamurai@sh.itjust.works]

Look, if I can't slap my dick down on the table, life isn't worth living. And, by definition, that is a form of dick measuring. Since it measures the dick against the table, the table is therefore measured against the dick.

However! If someone would volunteer to be a flesh table for the period of the no-table-measuring, that would be acceptable. If I can measure my dick against someone's shoulders or hips, problem solved, and I'm 200 mil richer.

[chicosuave@lemmy.world]

36 hours in and I would think I'm in the clear then someone would need some real help, like loading their truck to move some stuff for their kids party and ask me, "think it will all fit?" In that moment reflexes would lose the money.

[idunnololz@lemmy.world]

You only have to do it for 2 days. Just put yourself into a medically induced coma for 2 days. Its easy money.

[whatsisface@sh.itjust.works]

No. It's not worth the lasting damage it would cause. You'll need to live with it for the rest of your life.

All the people answering "yes" so confidently are severely underestimating the life-altering consequences this sort of trauma can cause. No amount of money would ever fix it.

[engywuck@lemm.ee]

I'll just pay someone else to measure it.

[shoo@lemmy.world]

Depends which table

[digestive_biscuit@feddit.uk]

I was actually measuring my desk today as I want to fit a draw under it.

[jacklsauce@lemmy.world]

What is her job?

TABLES!!

[honytawk@lemmy.zip]

Nooo, my database is fucked!