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  3. What’s an unspoken rule that absolutely everyone should know, but most people clearly don’t?

What’s an unspoken rule that absolutely everyone should know, but most people clearly don’t?

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  • J [email protected]

    Here's a weird one:

    Don't offer advice unless its something you have some experience with.

    Googling someone's issues and giving them a boilerplate answer from the first thing you find isn't helpful and can actually be a hinderance more than anything.

    G This user is from outside of this forum
    G This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by
    #108

    Something I've learned to practice with friends. When people call me I try to make sure I ask "do you want advice or do you just want someone to listen?"

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    • P [email protected]

      Worked at a Starbucks in college that was open until midnight. One time there were a couple of girls hanging out and didn’t leave when 12 rolled around. We started doing our closing tasks, locked the doors, etc. and they still remained. Finally I was starting to mop the floor and one of them said to me, “Were you going to ask us to leave?” And I said, “We’re not allowed to.” They were so apologetic after that. Yeah whatever, just get the hell out.

      N This user is from outside of this forum
      N This user is from outside of this forum
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      wrote on last edited by
      #109

      So if you're not allowed to I assume you get paid overtime if you have to stay after hours because of this, not doing so would be illegal in most countries. Knowing that I would get some friends to come over, play some games chat and do whatever we would normally do until 3/4 AM every Friday, get to hang out with friends and get paid for it, win/win. If asked I would just say "well, my friends came over to see me, and I couldn't ask them to leave".

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      • sanemartigan@aussie.zoneS [email protected]

        If you're in a drive on the left or right side of the road country, that goes for bike and walking paths too. Eg in Australia, keep left on footpaths.

        G This user is from outside of this forum
        G This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #110

        And for the love of god if you're on a shared bike/walking path, keep your dog/child on the same fucking side as you. Share the gd path.

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        • C [email protected]

          It DOES NOT matter if it’s done with 3 feet to merge or 300 feet to merge. There’s no efficiency gain.

          Merging early leaves unused road. Shoving the cars into fewer lanes makes the traffic jam longer and makes it impact more interesections far behind the actual hangup. If you can merge early without slowing down, sure go for it. I'm mostly talking about the scenarios where it's already slowed to a crawl and people feel like they have to merge early to not be seen as "cutting in line."

          Edit, also to add, if everyone merges early even at speed, eventually, the car density in the reduced lanes will reach a point where people naturally slow down and you have bumper to bumper traffic.

          I suggest Traffic by Tom Vanderbilt for more.

          dark_arc@social.packetloss.ggD This user is from outside of this forum
          dark_arc@social.packetloss.ggD This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by [email protected]
          #111

          "Unused road" is ridiculous except in extremes. Unless people merge well over a mile back, 1 lane of traffic will make no difference. The only way "unused road" matters is for the people that haven't entered the traffic jam yet who are getting off before they reach it.

          Very few people (from what I've seen) merge more than 30 car lengths out. 30 cars is not going to make a difference.

          What does make a difference is the fact that we can't do a merge at speed because some people want to "zipper late." It's the zipper behavior that matters, the "at the very end" part never should've been added to that recommendation.

          Looking at an actual research paper about this, the zipper merge demonstrated is not at the last possible point. A merge point forms ahead of that point and that's what should be used. The pictures from their study show the zipper occurring over a wide area with many of the zipped cars driving in the middle.

          https://rosap.ntl.bts.gov/view/dot/35694

          I don't know how studies like this have become the recommendations we have. They seem to me to miss critical bits.

          Edit: based on my quick read, it's worth noting the study finds only minimal support for the zipper merge and only in contexts not involving trucks largely based on visual analysis from their video feed as the quantitative data was not statistically significant. We need better transparency on recommendations like this frankly and the research supporting them. We should be able to have an honest debate on the merits of the papers.

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          • dark_arc@social.packetloss.ggD [email protected]

            The problem with zipper merges as this person describes them is a zipper merge is SUPPOSED TO get traffic back up to speed. However, when your take on the zipper merge is "up there where the wreck is at the last possible spot I can merge" there's no time for a human to safely merge at speed. So everything has to continue at a crawl.

            So the people jumping out of their lane and "zipper merging" at the last second instead of 50 feet out or so end up making things worse for everyone.

            The zipper does not and should not be at the point of the physical problem on the road. Just like you should not just drive to the end of the on ramp and at the last possible second merge into the lane on your left without paying attention.

            T This user is from outside of this forum
            T This user is from outside of this forum
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            wrote on last edited by
            #112

            That's what I said?
            Merge early at speed, merge late during congestion

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            • A [email protected]

              I’m 6’6” and my knees push against the seat in front of me even when not reclined.

              I have a right to be able to travel without you causing me discomfort, and that’s a bit stronger than you having the privilege of getting more comfortable.

              If you are the kind of person who asserts this “right” when someone asks you not to, you’re kind of a dick.

              venusaur@lemmy.worldV This user is from outside of this forum
              venusaur@lemmy.worldV This user is from outside of this forum
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              wrote on last edited by
              #113

              What if I get back pain if I’m not able to recline? I think your discomfort takes the backseat to my back pain (no pun intended).

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              • S [email protected]

                Fight not, here, rest your head on my lap pillow. UwU

                venusaur@lemmy.worldV This user is from outside of this forum
                venusaur@lemmy.worldV This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #114

                What if you fart? Will you warn me?

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                • G [email protected]

                  Put your cart back when you're done shopping.

                  Z This user is from outside of this forum
                  Z This user is from outside of this forum
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                  wrote on last edited by
                  #115

                  I'll leave this here: https://youtube.com/@cartnarcs

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                  • saltsong@startrek.websiteS [email protected]

                    In general, stay out of the ducking way.

                    T This user is from outside of this forum
                    T This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #116

                    Confirmed; if I see a duck approaching, I will step aside.

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                    • 2 [email protected]

                      You're not allowed to ask people to leave after closing? That's awful, what the hell!

                      T This user is from outside of this forum
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                      wrote on last edited by
                      #117

                      Some companies, especially bigger ones, value customers far more than they do employees. Many of those have rules against doing anything that might be misconstrued as hostile, such as suggesting to a customer that their presence is no longer desirable (even if this is done completely justifiably and politely).

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                      • mothra@mander.xyzM [email protected]

                        I would add an asterisk there and say this should reflect the driving/roads convention used in the country. Where I live, the driver's seat is on the right side of a car and on escalators most people stand still on the left, letting the right side clear for walking.

                        F This user is from outside of this forum
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                        wrote on last edited by
                        #118

                        To make matters more complicated i believe (but may be wrong) in Japan Tokyo and Osaka have opposite conventions. So it can even come down to the city level.

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                        • agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.worksA [email protected]

                          So many of these are "Don't create obstacles or bottlenecks".

                          Return your cart, zipper merge, wait for people to get off before you get on, don't block doorways.

                          Clearly, the truest unspoken rule is "Get out of the way!"

                          J This user is from outside of this forum
                          J This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #119

                          If you need to have a conversation with someone, don't block the entire hallway to do it.

                          O A 2 Replies Last reply
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                          • T [email protected]

                            Remember to be kind.

                            kissaki@feddit.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
                            kissaki@feddit.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
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                            wrote on last edited by
                            #120

                            I'm one of a kind. Does that count?

                            sanguinepar@lemmy.worldS 1 Reply Last reply
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                            • nenathaniel@lemmy.caN [email protected]

                              When waiting at a red light, cars are supposed to stay out of the pedestrian crosswalk

                              A This user is from outside of this forum
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                              wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                              #121

                              EDIT: Comment below is a product of misunderstanding of the original statement. I thought it was about pedestrians.

                              To be fair, at a red light you are legally expected to not initiate the crossing. You can finish it freely at any pace even if the red is in.

                              But a polite thing to do is to not enter the crosswalk if you can't cross it before red turns on.

                              W nenathaniel@lemmy.caN 2 Replies Last reply
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                              • agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.worksA [email protected]

                                No disembark! Only board.

                                T This user is from outside of this forum
                                T This user is from outside of this forum
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                                wrote on last edited by
                                #122

                                SCP-342 😉

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                                • kissaki@feddit.orgK [email protected]

                                  I'm one of a kind. Does that count?

                                  sanguinepar@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  sanguinepar@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #123

                                  Kind of.

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                                  • scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.techS [email protected]

                                    You stand on the right side of an escalator/moving walkway. You walk on the left side.

                                    It doesn't matter if you have multiple people or luggage, the right is for standing, the left is for walking.

                                    sanguinepar@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
                                    sanguinepar@lemmy.worldS This user is from outside of this forum
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                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #124

                                    I think it depends though. I've seen escalators with markers to indicate standing on the left. In that scenario, I think best to do as indicated rather than insist on right is right.

                                    scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.techS 1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • T [email protected]
                                      This post did not contain any content.
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                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #125

                                      Let the people out of the elevator that are trying to get out of the elevator before you attempt getting in.

                                      G X 2 Replies Last reply
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                                      • A [email protected]

                                        EDIT: Comment below is a product of misunderstanding of the original statement. I thought it was about pedestrians.

                                        To be fair, at a red light you are legally expected to not initiate the crossing. You can finish it freely at any pace even if the red is in.

                                        But a polite thing to do is to not enter the crosswalk if you can't cross it before red turns on.

                                        W This user is from outside of this forum
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                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #126

                                        The comment I left t here no longer relevant because parent and child revised their comments after the fact. This is not a healthy way to have a discourse people.

                                        A 1 Reply Last reply
                                        1
                                        • W [email protected]

                                          The comment I left t here no longer relevant because parent and child revised their comments after the fact. This is not a healthy way to have a discourse people.

                                          A This user is from outside of this forum
                                          A This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                                          #127

                                          EDIT it seems to be a misunderstanding based on the misinterpretation of original statement. It was edited since then to clarify, rendering the original discussion obsolete.

                                          Cars should NOT stay on the crosswalk when the red light is on. You should only drive through the crosswalk if the light is green and there is space behind the crosswalk enough to fit your car. If you stay there, blocking the crosswalk - you are in the wrong.

                                          Pedestrians, however, can enter the crosswalk on green and continue crossing the road even if the traffic light turns red. It's still a good tone, however, to plan ahead and not make drivers wait.

                                          Original comment preserved:

                                          A Wikipedia piece on that very issue to hopefully settle us:

                                          1000076005

                                          Red light prohibits entering the junction, not staying there. There are some rare regional deviations, such as in New York City, but generally staying after red is not a violation - at least as long as the junction is not specially marked by yellow grid.

                                          https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rules_for_traffic_lights

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