Top tip
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I stress so much about being late for things that I usually plan to be 15 minutes early to things and just wait. i'll start to flip out if things go south and i'm merely going to be on time. I talked to my therapist about this and she tells me to practice being late. sounds hard but okay i do what she tells me right?
So next poker night i decide to be 15 minutes late (other people routinely are this late so this should be fine!)
Wellll because i'm the only punctual and reliable one the host had counted on me to let people in to her condo (I had keys cuz i'm so reliable!) while she handled the big food order. She didnt bother telling me this because I had never once been late. She ended up being pretty grumpy about it which felt unfair but girl did this have the opposite effect my therapist intended
It has been about 8 months since then and i'm still trying to build up the courage to be late to something. Don't beat your children folks.
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Unironically, though.
Stop trying to be "on time" and start planning to arrive early. That way when something inevitably trips you up, you've got a buffer to work with, rather than any deviation automatically making you late.
Legitimately I started doing this when I realized I'm a better person when I'm not rushing. I can take my time getting there, maybe help someone get their bags to their car, chat with the panhandlers, hold doors open without wishing the other person would hurry up, etc.
Better than just flooding myself with cortisol all the way to my appointment and arriving all flustered and shit.
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I stress so much about being late for things that I usually plan to be 15 minutes early to things and just wait. i'll start to flip out if things go south and i'm merely going to be on time. I talked to my therapist about this and she tells me to practice being late. sounds hard but okay i do what she tells me right?
So next poker night i decide to be 15 minutes late (other people routinely are this late so this should be fine!)
Wellll because i'm the only punctual and reliable one the host had counted on me to let people in to her condo (I had keys cuz i'm so reliable!) while she handled the big food order. She didnt bother telling me this because I had never once been late. She ended up being pretty grumpy about it which felt unfair but girl did this have the opposite effect my therapist intended
It has been about 8 months since then and i'm still trying to build up the courage to be late to something. Don't beat your children folks.
Damn what an unfortunate coincidence, but also totally not your fault. And you know I'm sure everything turned out fine, right? Like the event didn't get cancelled. The "bad thing" that happened was a bunch of people standing around chatting for 15 minutes.
I'm sure you've had to wait on someone for longer than 15 minutes. The world doesn't end, right?
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This post pisses me off. Literally no matter how much I try, plan, give triple double extra time to be ready, and attempt to be early.
With any or all of that there is no guarantee that I won't be late.
This is not a choice for me.
Fuck this post, and fuck all you people who think it's that simple. YOU are the problem.
-- Edit --
All down votes on my comments and upvotes on the sheep diarrhea responses here are from ableist anus wrinkles of people. -
Damn what an unfortunate coincidence, but also totally not your fault. And you know I'm sure everything turned out fine, right? Like the event didn't get cancelled. The "bad thing" that happened was a bunch of people standing around chatting for 15 minutes.
I'm sure you've had to wait on someone for longer than 15 minutes. The world doesn't end, right?
oh yes everything was okay by the end of the night, it just didn't help alleviate my excitability in the slightest. I'm still looking for opportunities to practice being late but i can't. don't want to be late to grocery pickup and mess up the workers, don't want to be late to the vet and get cancelled don't want to be late to a date and make them feel bad, etc.
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This post pisses me off. Literally no matter how much I try, plan, give triple double extra time to be ready, and attempt to be early.
With any or all of that there is no guarantee that I won't be late.
This is not a choice for me.
Fuck this post, and fuck all you people who think it's that simple. YOU are the problem.
-- Edit --
All down votes on my comments and upvotes on the sheep diarrhea responses here are from ableist anus wrinkles of people.I don't see how time blindness prevents you from setting an alarm.
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I don't see how time blindness prevents you from setting an alarm.
That's part of the problem. People assume an alarm—or some other '""simple"" solution—would solve everything. There's a fundamental lack of understanding, then, worsening the issue, people are judged based on that non-existent foundational comprehension that people don't always work the way you do.
It's simply not up to us. We can try, and sometimes succeed, but it's simply not within our control.
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You clearly have no experience with ADHD. I have autism, I'm always way too early. My ADHD friends just don't work that way. They are always late, even when they plan on leaving early.
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You clearly have no experience with ADHD. I have autism, I'm always way too early. My ADHD friends just don't work that way. They are always late, even when they plan on leaving early.
Yeah time gets wonky for us
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Its not hard, set an alarm 2minutes before you should drive. Just stop what you're doing when the alarm goes off. It will wait on you to come back,,, no neeed for just anything. Get going
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oh yes everything was okay by the end of the night, it just didn't help alleviate my excitability in the slightest. I'm still looking for opportunities to practice being late but i can't. don't want to be late to grocery pickup and mess up the workers, don't want to be late to the vet and get cancelled don't want to be late to a date and make them feel bad, etc.
It's a tough scenario. It's not like good to be late, even though it's OK to be late.
What about a dentist or doctor's appointment? A little risky hehe, but they're usually late to admit you; and since you're a betting person, that might be an interesting one to try.
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You clearly have no experience with ADHD. I have autism, I'm always way too early. My ADHD friends just don't work that way. They are always late, even when they plan on leaving early.
Something always happens and because I'm not hyper sensitive about time I don't really mind if I'm delayed.
It's usually because the cats won't come in. But I can't say I couldn't come because I was worried the cats would get wet so instead I blame traffic.
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Its not hard, set an alarm 2minutes before you should drive. Just stop what you're doing when the alarm goes off. It will wait on you to come back,,, no neeed for just anything. Get going
Nope doesn't work. When the alarm goes off I ignore it, because I have 2 minutes.
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Something always happens and because I'm not hyper sensitive about time I don't really mind if I'm delayed.
It's usually because the cats won't come in. But I can't say I couldn't come because I was worried the cats would get wet so instead I blame traffic.
Hahaha same here, I cannot leave the house when my cats are still outside. I taught them to come when I whistle, that really helps. Every time when I feed them or give them a treat, I whistle before I give it to them. After they get used to it, I give them something 75% of the time.
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Unironically, though.
Stop trying to be "on time" and start planning to arrive early. That way when something inevitably trips you up, you've got a buffer to work with, rather than any deviation automatically making you late.
Legitimately I started doing this when I realized I'm a better person when I'm not rushing. I can take my time getting there, maybe help someone get their bags to their car, chat with the panhandlers, hold doors open without wishing the other person would hurry up, etc.
Better than just flooding myself with cortisol all the way to my appointment and arriving all flustered and shit.
wrote last edited by [email protected]Honestly the thing that helped me the most with my time management was Google Maps repeatedly stabbing me in the back. I was always leaving at the last possible second, relying on maps to tell me what that second was.
When I moved to the city and traffic became a serious concern, Google's '20 minute' estimate would balloon out to 30 minutes on important appointments like doctor's visits and work. So now I look at the estimate, add the higher of ten minutes or 30% to it, and make it comfortably on time to wherever I was meant to go.
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I solved my poverty problem by making more money - click Like and Subscribe!
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You clearly have no experience with ADHD. I have autism, I'm always way too early. My ADHD friends just don't work that way. They are always late, even when they plan on leaving early.
I know this probably won't help but it's kind of funny. My D&D group years ago had one member who was consistently an hour or more late. So the DM started telling her the game was an hour earlier. People would show up slightly early for the real time, and she would straggle in apologetically, pretty much right on time. Worked like a charm for almost a year before she finally caught on.
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This post pisses me off. Literally no matter how much I try, plan, give triple double extra time to be ready, and attempt to be early.
With any or all of that there is no guarantee that I won't be late.
This is not a choice for me.
Fuck this post, and fuck all you people who think it's that simple. YOU are the problem.
-- Edit --
All down votes on my comments and upvotes on the sheep diarrhea responses here are from ableist anus wrinkles of people.The poster is being sarcastic. She's got ADHD herself and is a very avid poster in the ADHD meme sub. The point of this post is that the guy in the screenshot is ignorant.
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ADHD sufferer here.
A lot of these commenters seem to be using their ADHD as a crutch. Most people in my sphere are late because arriving late gets them the attention they crave.
Sorry, but having ADHD is NOT a good excuse when it comes to being somewhere on time.
