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  3. Expectations vs reality for those who moved from a city to a small town?

Expectations vs reality for those who moved from a city to a small town?

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  • T This user is from outside of this forum
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    wrote last edited by [email protected]
    #42

    I'm experiencing the exact opposite, personally.

    My neighbors have been extremely kind and generous, on a level that couldn't even be dreamed of in the city.

    They've literally helped me cut my grass on several occasions out of pure kindness because they have a riding mower and I have a push one. And that's just one family.

    My car has also never been broken into after years of living here. In the city, all of my friends' cars have been broken into.

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    • T [email protected]

      Bar culture is a waste of money anyways.

      You can get more variety at a cheaper price from grocery stores. It doesn't make sense to pay more money to drink at a bar with people who you're not close enough to visit each other's homes.

      Anyone who spends $7 on a shot when an entire bottle costs $12 isn't using their brain.

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      wrote last edited by
      #43

      I was with you until you said grocery store beer. No selection at grocery stores in my area unless you want a lager.

      T 1 Reply Last reply
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      • T [email protected]

        I was with you until you said grocery store beer. No selection at grocery stores in my area unless you want a lager.

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        wrote last edited by
        #44

        I'm mostly referring to liquor because it's the most economical way to get drunk.

        My local Walmart has a decent selection of beers, but I've been to HEBs that have entire sections devoted to craft beers. It may depend on the grocery store in question.

        You can still get a better selection at a cheaper price at liquor stores than bars.

        mrrazamataz@lemmy.razbot.xyzM K 2 Replies Last reply
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        • socsa@piefed.socialS [email protected]

          Small town only feel safer until you end up pissing off the wrong person with the right influence. And then it feels like living in some Mafia nightmare. It doesn't even take pissing people off either. Tell someone you are gay in secret? Now half the town thinks you are a pedophile.

          Small town "safety" is a myth for the privileged. The crime gap is also kind of a myth. Most small town police departments won't even write a report for domestic violence unless someone ends up in the hospital.

          lowspeedchase@lemmy.dbzer0.comL This user is from outside of this forum
          lowspeedchase@lemmy.dbzer0.comL This user is from outside of this forum
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          wrote last edited by
          #45

          I'm sorry you have had bad experiences and they've stuck with you. I wish you the best in the future!

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          • C [email protected]

            A lot of people from California come to the smaller cities near bigger cities in southern Missouri. What sucks is that they're driving up the costs of homes and real estate. Wish I could go somewhere that's still kinda nice and get a bigger nicer house for 1\4 the cost and retire early.

            lowspeedchase@lemmy.dbzer0.comL This user is from outside of this forum
            lowspeedchase@lemmy.dbzer0.comL This user is from outside of this forum
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            wrote last edited by
            #46

            I get it, I often daydream about life as a member of the lucky sperm club lol

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            • U [email protected]

              - **Less Police Presence**. Crime rates drop inordinately as the population decreases, and with that, you see a lot less "boys in blue" - furthermore, because it's usually just a few people, you get to know them and have less anxiety with interactions.

              That’s not the impression I got from Twin Peaks 🧐

              lowspeedchase@lemmy.dbzer0.comL This user is from outside of this forum
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              wrote last edited by
              #47

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              • lennybird@lemmy.worldL [email protected]

                How small we talking?

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                wrote last edited by
                #48

                Around 2,000 people

                lennybird@lemmy.worldL 1 Reply Last reply
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                • D [email protected]

                  Around 2,000 people

                  lennybird@lemmy.worldL This user is from outside of this forum
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                  wrote last edited by
                  #49

                  Oh wow, yeah, truly small. It depends on your own outlook and how willing you are to assimilate, or if you're okay with being kind of an outcast who sticks to themselves. If for instance you're a young progressive atheist moving to a rural Tennessee town of deeply religious conservatives, yeah that's not going to be fun. Small Vermont ski town? You'll fit right in. Alaskan town? They'll be conservative, sure, but given the weather and isolation, people have a tendency to rely upon each other and that brings the community closer together.

                  I grew up rural just outside a town of about 30,000 that was just transitioning to a formally-designated small city. You could go to the grocery store and not see people you knew 2 out of 3 times, I'd say. It's not always bad. We're social creatures and the internet has gotten us away from that, somewhat detrimentally.

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                  • T [email protected]

                    Bar culture is a waste of money anyways.

                    You can get more variety at a cheaper price from grocery stores. It doesn't make sense to pay more money to drink at a bar with people who you're not close enough to visit each other's homes.

                    Anyone who spends $7 on a shot when an entire bottle costs $12 isn't using their brain.

                    V This user is from outside of this forum
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                    wrote last edited by
                    #50

                    Meeting people at the grocery store: 😰

                    W T 2 Replies Last reply
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                    • S [email protected]

                      The slutty farmer’s daughter is usually ugly but always a great lay.

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                      wrote last edited by
                      #51

                      Yeah. She will always be there when nobody responds to your booty call. Sluts are the real friends in your life.

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                      • socsa@piefed.socialS [email protected]

                        The pond gets small really fucking quick. You will run into someone you know almost every time you leave the house. You can't just blend in and get away from anything. Including whatever reputation you develop.

                        It's honestly fucking awful.

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                        wrote last edited by [email protected]
                        #52

                        Y'know, that's the primary thing people cite as being nice about a small town. Interesting it was a nasty surprise for you.

                        T socsa@piefed.socialS 2 Replies Last reply
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                        • V [email protected]

                          Meeting people at the grocery store: 😰

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                          wrote last edited by
                          #53

                          Yeah, I'm a pretty cheap person, but I don't go to a bar to save money, I go to relax and socialize.

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                          • C [email protected]

                            Y'know, that's the primary thing people cite as being nice about a small town. Interesting it was a nasty surprise for you.

                            T This user is from outside of this forum
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                            wrote last edited by
                            #54

                            He couldn't hide his reputation enough lmao

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                            • V [email protected]

                              Meeting people at the grocery store: 😰

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                              wrote last edited by [email protected]
                              #55

                              If you're not living a boring life, then you should naturally come across plenty of different people with plenty of different opportunities to make connections.

                              "Meeting people at the grocery store" is a lazy and ignorant excuse to justify going to bars. If you think those are your only two options, then you're the problem and I pity anyone who gets caught in your web.

                              V ivanafterall@lemmy.worldI 2 Replies Last reply
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                              • C [email protected]

                                Y'know, that's the primary thing people cite as being nice about a small town. Interesting it was a nasty surprise for you.

                                socsa@piefed.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
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                                wrote last edited by
                                #56

                                "Why don't you go to church?" gets tedious after the 14,000th time.

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                                • T [email protected]

                                  I'm mostly referring to liquor because it's the most economical way to get drunk.

                                  My local Walmart has a decent selection of beers, but I've been to HEBs that have entire sections devoted to craft beers. It may depend on the grocery store in question.

                                  You can still get a better selection at a cheaper price at liquor stores than bars.

                                  mrrazamataz@lemmy.razbot.xyzM This user is from outside of this forum
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                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #57

                                  If you think the only use of a pub is to get drunk then I think you're using them wrong...

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                                  • T [email protected]

                                    If you're not living a boring life, then you should naturally come across plenty of different people with plenty of different opportunities to make connections.

                                    "Meeting people at the grocery store" is a lazy and ignorant excuse to justify going to bars. If you think those are your only two options, then you're the problem and I pity anyone who gets caught in your web.

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                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #58

                                    And you don't understand that some people prefer the bar. But I guess you have the only right way to do things.

                                    T 1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • T [email protected]

                                      I'm mostly referring to liquor because it's the most economical way to get drunk.

                                      My local Walmart has a decent selection of beers, but I've been to HEBs that have entire sections devoted to craft beers. It may depend on the grocery store in question.

                                      You can still get a better selection at a cheaper price at liquor stores than bars.

                                      K This user is from outside of this forum
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                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #59

                                      I’m mostly referring to liquor because it’s the most economical way to get drunk.

                                      Why not bathtub moonshine? That is even more economical.

                                      T 1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • Z [email protected]

                                        Here’s the thing about “groceries in town”. You will find deals at the deli/bakery and possibly the butcher areas of the store. Sometimes. That said, 80% of it is ridiculously priced.

                                        What often happens is people store more food and bundle their drive into town for stuff.

                                        I will, for example, do most of my grocery shopping after my last shift in a run. Less gas and bother and it’s on the way.

                                        We have a large garden. Two freezers. Cold storage. Two fridges. Fruit trees. If a snow storm dropped and we were stuck for a month we’d be fine. The food would get boring, but we’d be fine.

                                        The one danger to this move you’re making will be the sounds or lack thereof. Once you go rural you may have a very hard time going back to hearing people and their vehicles all the time. As in they become a point of grating stress until they stop.

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                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #60

                                        I don't even live in a rural area and am thinking of more ways to store/preserve food. Want to get a bunch of jars to preserve things in. Along with getting an allotment so that I can grow more although currently most fruits I forage from publicly accessible trees/bushes. Recently came back with a sack full of apples and cooked that down to about 5L of unsweetened apple sauce.

                                        I was going to try dehydrating it but the first 2L batch has got me deciding fuck that, it will take so much time/energy to dehydrate it all. Storing it in jars should be much easier in comparison.

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                                        • D [email protected]

                                          I'm in the process of doing the above and would like to hear about your experience. Were there any surprises? What was as you expected?

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                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #61

                                          My experience- YMMV. Be careful who you talk to and what gossip you engage in. Basically everyone knows everyone to some degree. Everybody is somebodies cousins friend or something. Its a good thing when you get used to it, more security and whatever, but it does mean that any social damage you do (cheating on someone for instance) will have far wider consequences than you realise.

                                          Job hunting is extremely difficult for the same reason unless you're trained in some in-demand specialist skill. Every job goes to someone's cousin. In my last factory job we had an idiot working there, constantly on the verge of getting sacked, he attended a funeral one day and discovered that his dead cousin was also cousins with the manager. He was team leader the very next week for his overall diligence to duty.

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