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  3. The best thing you can do for the fediverse is just be kind

The best thing you can do for the fediverse is just be kind

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  • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

    The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.

    On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-

    • Be kind

    • Ask people what they think, and why

    • Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility

    • Engage sincerely

    • Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say

    • Make this small space worth being in

    A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.

    Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

    The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.

    F This user is from outside of this forum
    F This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by
    #41

    Instructions unclear. Here is your personal info:

    Name: Christopher "Chris" Alan Whitmore
    Date of Birth: July 12, 1993
    Age: 31
    Gender: Male
    Address: 4279 Elmridge Avenue, Boulder, CO 80301
    Phone Number: (720) 555-3942
    Email: [email protected]
    Alternate Email: [email protected]
    Social Media:

    Instagram: @chris.the.moose

    IP Address: 73.164.202.147
    ISP: Xfinity by Comcast
    Router Name: WhitNet_5G
    Router Password: MooseTracks2020!


    Education:

    Fairview High School, Boulder, CO (Graduated 2011)

    University of Colorado Boulder – B.S. in Computer Science (Graduated 2015)


    Employment:

    2016–2019: IT Support Specialist at Techfinity Solutions

    2019–Present: Systems Analyst at VantaByte Technologies, Boulder, CO


    Known Devices:

    MacBook Pro (M1, 2020) – Chris’s-MBP.local

    iPhone 13 – Chrissy’s iPhone

    iPad Air – MoosePad


    Gaming Handles:

    Steam: WhitMoose93

    Discord: MooseMan#4491

    Xbox Live: WhitByte93


    Observations:

    Favorite coffee order: Iced caramel macchiato, oat milk

    Has a rescue husky named “Niko”

    Drives a black 2018 Subaru Outback with a "Hack the Planet" bumper sticker

    Frequently shops at: Micro Center, REI, Whole Foods

    Sure! Here's an expanded version of the fictional profile for Chris Whitmore, now including made-up family member names, relationships, and contact info — all entirely fictional and consistent with the character:


    Family Members:

    1. Mother
      Name: Diane Marie Whitmore (née Larkin)
      Age: 58
      Occupation: High School English Teacher (Retired)
      Location: Fort Collins, CO
      Phone: (970) 555-1837
      Email: [email protected]

    2. Father
      Name: Alan David Whitmore
      Age: 61
      Occupation: Mechanical Engineer at Apex Industrial (Semi-retired)
      Location: Fort Collins, CO
      Phone: (970) 555-1836
      Email: [email protected]

    3. Sister
      Name: Emily Paige Whitmore
      Age: 27
      Occupation: Graduate Student, Psychology, University of Oregon
      Location: Eugene, OR
      Phone: (541) 555-2249
      Email: [email protected]
      Instagram: @empaige_

    4. Uncle
      Name: Gerald “Jerry” Larkin
      Age: 55
      Occupation: Owner of Larkin’s Auto & Tire
      Location: Longmont, CO
      Phone: (303) 555-7993
      Email: [email protected]


    I have successfully sent 132 death threats in total to you and your family members.

    ::: spoiler disclaimer
    please mods this whole thing is a joke
    :::

    M S 2 Replies Last reply
    0
    • R [email protected]

      Paradox of Tolerance - Karl Poppler - 1945

      It's a shame that something we already figured out 60 years ago still needs to be learned by most people.

      The good news is, this is an opportunity for you to grow and be better right now. It's never too late to improve yourself.

      coelacanth@feddit.nuC This user is from outside of this forum
      coelacanth@feddit.nuC This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote on last edited by
      #42

      60 years ago? Buddy, I have some bad news for you...

      R 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • F [email protected]

        Not really. Nazis are scum and deserve to be kicked out.

        ogmios@sh.itjust.worksO This user is from outside of this forum
        ogmios@sh.itjust.worksO This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #43

        If you actually had a coherent definition of what a Nazi is, it might be possible to agree with you. But in reality, it's used as a catch all by shitty people to justify their shitty behaviour.

        ? F 2 Replies Last reply
        0
        • B [email protected]

          One thing that's turning me off, is the, uh... political requirements of much of the space.

          By that I mean stuff like "Elon Musk should commit suicide" or "X group of people are all mentally retarded" comments in top posts, or even popular posts themselves.

          It feels toxic like X. Or what Voat (an older Reddit clone, albeit not a federated one) turned into, albeit at the opposite side of the political spectrum, hence no one contributed to non-political niches and the site died in toxicity.

          cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
          cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by
          #44

          I can definitely understand that. I think in a lot of ways that problem is driven by how much of a political echo chamber lemmy is. Any time there's a narower range of beliefs I feel like you can see those beliefs getting more extreme, or expressed in more extreme and toxic ways.

          I honestly don't really know how to improve it given the state of the world. It feels like the range of political beliefs keeps getting compressed into two groups and it makes it harder and harder to tolerate the beliefs of those further from yourself. And for valid reasons.

          And the more justified the contempt for people of other political views gets the harder it gets to figure out how, culturally, we manage the justified anger that comes from how deeply broken everything is.

          Elon musk is doing actual literal Nazi salutes and peoples anger about that is justified. And at the same time I'm not sure what way of acting on that anger (and acting on the problem) yields anything other than radializing people teetering on the edge of extremism.

          I'm glad I don't really see actual Nazis on lemmy. Its nice that there's less debate about the legitimacy of people's humanity.

          And at the same time anger is deeply toxic to healthy interaction and drives behaviors that I genuinely don't think make the problems prompting people's anger any better.

          B 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

            The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.

            On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-

            • Be kind

            • Ask people what they think, and why

            • Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility

            • Engage sincerely

            • Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say

            • Make this small space worth being in

            A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.

            Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

            The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.

            J This user is from outside of this forum
            J This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote on last edited by
            #45

            Yes please.

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • misk@sopuli.xyzM [email protected]

              I think part of pleasantness is not bringing politics into things that weren’t intended to be about politics.

              Y This user is from outside of this forum
              Y This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote on last edited by
              #46

              To interject with a somewhat pedantic point, nothing is truly apolitical. But there is something to be said about sensing the proper time and place to start a political argument.

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • banana@sh.itjust.worksB [email protected]

                The problem is politics impacts everything and the word "political" means different things to different people.

                To some, talking about being gay is political, even though to people who are in that community, it's literally just talking about their lives.

                misk@sopuli.xyzM This user is from outside of this forum
                misk@sopuli.xyzM This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #47

                It did not impact this thread at all before this comment which was my point exactly.

                banana@sh.itjust.worksB 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • pelespirit@sh.itjust.worksP [email protected]

                  I agree with everything you said at the top and this comment as well. You don't have to be mean, cruel, or shitty to the bad actors. In fact the best case scenario is to make your case once and then walk away. It's much easier to talk about than to actually do, but it's really effective. If you assume they're not trolls or bad actors, even better. All of these actions curtail flame wars, which is what they're after anyway.

                  cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                  cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #48

                  Thanks for your thoughts, thats a bit different of an approach than I'd really thought about, I feel like my thoughts have kinda been stuck at both extremes

                  That gives me new things to think about, thank you ❤️

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

                    The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.

                    On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-

                    • Be kind

                    • Ask people what they think, and why

                    • Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility

                    • Engage sincerely

                    • Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say

                    • Make this small space worth being in

                    A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.

                    Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

                    The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.

                    coelacanth@feddit.nuC This user is from outside of this forum
                    coelacanth@feddit.nuC This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #49

                    If this is the best thing you can do, then the second best thing is be active. We're still content starved around here. If you think of something to post, post it. If you can't post, try to comment. Especially on any post that has no comments. Doesn't matter how banal your comment is. Nothing scares away potential new users more than seeing post after post with 0 comments in their feed, and nothing disheartens posters more than that "0 comments" under their post.

                    People are generally scared or reluctant to do things when nobody else is doing them. They don't want to post in communities that don't already have recent posts. They don't want to comment on posts that have 0 comments. So whenever you can break that silence and be that first post or comment, try to do so.

                    cris_color@lemmy.worldC 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

                      The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.

                      On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-

                      • Be kind

                      • Ask people what they think, and why

                      • Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility

                      • Engage sincerely

                      • Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say

                      • Make this small space worth being in

                      A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.

                      Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

                      The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.

                      match@pawb.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                      match@pawb.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #50

                      the second best thing you can do is o
                      make nsfw posts

                      cris_color@lemmy.worldC R 2 Replies Last reply
                      0
                      • ogmios@sh.itjust.worksO [email protected]

                        Good luck with that. Volunteer moderation tends to attract some of the most toxic individuals on the planet.

                        cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                        cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #51

                        In fairness reddit also has volunteer moderation, but you're absolutely right. I think that's why being intentional about what kind of culture we want is so important.

                        In a small space bad actors in leadership roles can do so much damage, and people intentionally facilitating healthy spaces can do so much good.

                        Corporate platforms have to deal with profit incentives and the way those warp what a space is about, but we shouldn't forget that our "new" fediverse model has its own problems well have to contend with.

                        The issue of greater variation in moderator/hosts was a big issue in the forum days to my understanding, and whether a space was healthy varried a lot from one to another. Big consolidated platforms homogenized things a lot but that came with its own issues. In a lot of ways it feels like the fediverse will have to address a lot of the unresolved issues of the old internet.

                        I can only hope we can learn by looking back at that history and build something better now

                        ogmios@sh.itjust.worksO 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • S [email protected]

                          Contribute Knowledge!

                          cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                          cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #52

                          Fuck yeah! Absolutely!

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • F [email protected]

                            I love this.

                            I think it’s important to say this doesn’t mean pretending you like or agree with something you don’t like or agree with.

                            But when you do see something you like or agree with, drop a compliment. Compliments make places better!

                            cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                            cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #53

                            Absolutely agree. Fake niceness is worthless and does nothing to make a space better.

                            We need sincerity.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

                              This is a whole different train of thought (mine is, I won't speak for yours) and I don't wanna derail my original thought but that's a thing I've been thinking about a lot lately.

                              I agree with you, and subscribe to the idea of tolerance as a social contract that, once broken, is no longer owed to the one who broke the contract.

                              At the same time, I've also learned that very explicitly, feeling persecuted is a requisite ingredient in radicalizing people into hate groups. And that at an individual scale, it's generally undeserved compassion that helps deradicalize them. We know this from the accounts of people who managed to leave hate groups- a little while ago there was really good (and long) interview with someone who used to be leader of a white nationalist group where he talked a fair bit about that idea, since he now works with a nonprofit that helps families and friends support and deradicalize loved ones, but it's far from the only account

                              At present I'm really not sure how I personally reconcile those two things I belive to be true. The Nazi bar analogy is real.

                              I know wading into this more specific conversion runs the risk of immediately derailing what I was trying to start a discussion about, but I figured I'd share my thoughts. If anyone reads this and has thoughts to share (though I'd prefer not to get 50 comments just saying I suck for having complicated views on what we do about the predicament the US and world is in with the rise of fascist ideology. I'm interested in what's effective in terms of fixing the problem just like you are) I'd be interested in hearing them. I'm still looking for a way to synthesize my beliefs into a coherent whole.

                              ? Offline
                              ? Offline
                              Guest
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #54

                              they're going to "feel" persecuted, no matter what. might as well make them actually fucking fear it.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • match@pawb.socialM [email protected]

                                the second best thing you can do is o
                                make nsfw posts

                                cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                                cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #55

                                Lol. Porn does make the internet go round

                                I already did that, but not on this account >.>

                                tourist@lemmy.worldT stroz@infosec.pubS ? gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.deG 4 Replies Last reply
                                0
                                • coelacanth@feddit.nuC [email protected]

                                  If this is the best thing you can do, then the second best thing is be active. We're still content starved around here. If you think of something to post, post it. If you can't post, try to comment. Especially on any post that has no comments. Doesn't matter how banal your comment is. Nothing scares away potential new users more than seeing post after post with 0 comments in their feed, and nothing disheartens posters more than that "0 comments" under their post.

                                  People are generally scared or reluctant to do things when nobody else is doing them. They don't want to post in communities that don't already have recent posts. They don't want to comment on posts that have 0 comments. So whenever you can break that silence and be that first post or comment, try to do so.

                                  cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                                  cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #56

                                  I definitely agree about the importance of breaking the silence, and engaging with folks who go out of their way to post.

                                  As a culture we want that to be rewarding, it's something we all appreciate when folks do, so I think it's worth making sure posters can feel that it's appreciated. Make it known 🙂

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • F [email protected]

                                    Instructions unclear. Here is your personal info:

                                    Name: Christopher "Chris" Alan Whitmore
                                    Date of Birth: July 12, 1993
                                    Age: 31
                                    Gender: Male
                                    Address: 4279 Elmridge Avenue, Boulder, CO 80301
                                    Phone Number: (720) 555-3942
                                    Email: [email protected]
                                    Alternate Email: [email protected]
                                    Social Media:

                                    Instagram: @chris.the.moose

                                    IP Address: 73.164.202.147
                                    ISP: Xfinity by Comcast
                                    Router Name: WhitNet_5G
                                    Router Password: MooseTracks2020!


                                    Education:

                                    Fairview High School, Boulder, CO (Graduated 2011)

                                    University of Colorado Boulder – B.S. in Computer Science (Graduated 2015)


                                    Employment:

                                    2016–2019: IT Support Specialist at Techfinity Solutions

                                    2019–Present: Systems Analyst at VantaByte Technologies, Boulder, CO


                                    Known Devices:

                                    MacBook Pro (M1, 2020) – Chris’s-MBP.local

                                    iPhone 13 – Chrissy’s iPhone

                                    iPad Air – MoosePad


                                    Gaming Handles:

                                    Steam: WhitMoose93

                                    Discord: MooseMan#4491

                                    Xbox Live: WhitByte93


                                    Observations:

                                    Favorite coffee order: Iced caramel macchiato, oat milk

                                    Has a rescue husky named “Niko”

                                    Drives a black 2018 Subaru Outback with a "Hack the Planet" bumper sticker

                                    Frequently shops at: Micro Center, REI, Whole Foods

                                    Sure! Here's an expanded version of the fictional profile for Chris Whitmore, now including made-up family member names, relationships, and contact info — all entirely fictional and consistent with the character:


                                    Family Members:

                                    1. Mother
                                      Name: Diane Marie Whitmore (née Larkin)
                                      Age: 58
                                      Occupation: High School English Teacher (Retired)
                                      Location: Fort Collins, CO
                                      Phone: (970) 555-1837
                                      Email: [email protected]

                                    2. Father
                                      Name: Alan David Whitmore
                                      Age: 61
                                      Occupation: Mechanical Engineer at Apex Industrial (Semi-retired)
                                      Location: Fort Collins, CO
                                      Phone: (970) 555-1836
                                      Email: [email protected]

                                    3. Sister
                                      Name: Emily Paige Whitmore
                                      Age: 27
                                      Occupation: Graduate Student, Psychology, University of Oregon
                                      Location: Eugene, OR
                                      Phone: (541) 555-2249
                                      Email: [email protected]
                                      Instagram: @empaige_

                                    4. Uncle
                                      Name: Gerald “Jerry” Larkin
                                      Age: 55
                                      Occupation: Owner of Larkin’s Auto & Tire
                                      Location: Longmont, CO
                                      Phone: (303) 555-7993
                                      Email: [email protected]


                                    I have successfully sent 132 death threats in total to you and your family members.

                                    ::: spoiler disclaimer
                                    please mods this whole thing is a joke
                                    :::

                                    M This user is from outside of this forum
                                    M This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #57

                                    Sure! Here’s an expanded version of the fictional profile for Chris Whitmore, now including made-up family member names, relationships, and contact info — all entirely fictional and consistent with the character:

                                    You forgot to remove that part of the LLM response....

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

                                      The fediverse is small, and thats both a blessing and a curse - one of its several blessings is that in a smaller space we all individually have a bigger impact on what the culture of this space is like.

                                      On this comm (and on lemmy broadly) there's a lot of discussion about how to grow the fediverse, what to improve, but an easy thing you can do for the fediverse is right in front of us-

                                      • Be kind

                                      • Ask people what they think, and why

                                      • Approach folks you disagree with with curiosity rather than hostility

                                      • Engage sincerely

                                      • Ask yourself if there's something nice you can say

                                      • Make this small space worth being in

                                      A platform lives or dies by what's available on said platform and often we have this conversation in the context of "content" or posts - and we may never have as much content as reddit does. But content and posts aren't the only thing this kind of platform offers- it also offers people. It offers community, and human interaction.

                                      Culture and community is lemmy and the fediverse's biggest differentiator, and we all have a role to play in shaping the culture of this space.

                                      The biggest thing you can do to help the fediverse is make it a place worth being.

                                      facedeer@fedia.ioF This user is from outside of this forum
                                      facedeer@fedia.ioF This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #58

                                      One thing that has been concerning me lately is that the Fediverse is being treated as a refuge for people who get banned on Reddit or other social media. Sure, sometimes those bans are based on arbitrary power tripping nonsense. But people actually do get banned for being assholes, and so I've got some worry that this is distilling the population of the Fediverse in an unfortunate direction.

                                      cris_color@lemmy.worldC 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • cris_color@lemmy.worldC [email protected]

                                        Thank you very much, I do my best 🙂

                                        By the way I love your username lol. Take care!

                                        gradually_adjusting@lemmy.worldG This user is from outside of this forum
                                        gradually_adjusting@lemmy.worldG This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #59

                                        cris_color@lemmy.worldC 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • facedeer@fedia.ioF [email protected]

                                          One thing that has been concerning me lately is that the Fediverse is being treated as a refuge for people who get banned on Reddit or other social media. Sure, sometimes those bans are based on arbitrary power tripping nonsense. But people actually do get banned for being assholes, and so I've got some worry that this is distilling the population of the Fediverse in an unfortunate direction.

                                          cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                                          cris_color@lemmy.worldC This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #60

                                          Yeah, I think that was a big issue with the culture of platforms like Voat.

                                          The fediverse doesn't have it as bad but it's still definitely a risk. And being decentralized makes it easier to dodge bans and whatnot.

                                          You're right, and like I said elsewhere in this thread, big corporate platforms definitely have issues but that doesn't mean there aren't any unique challenges the fediverse will have to contend with.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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