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Oh goddammit

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  • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]

    Braces himself for the influx of Linux users

    N This user is from outside of this forum
    N This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by [email protected]
    #10

    Influx of Linux users.

    OH yes, do I have a wall-of-text for you. Lazypasting a relevant comment I made regarding the UI direction windows has taken for the past decade and a half:

    Example, if I want to change the thingamajig-ratio of the skoodleblurp, utilizing the brumblebork method:

    • Linux: skoodle -s thinga 50 (brumblebork is assumed by default unless something else is explicitly defined via --method=)
    • msdos 6.0: skoodleb /thing 50 /brumblebork
    • win 3.x and win95: can't do that natively, but the msdos method still works for some reason.
    • WinME: Nobody knows how it's done, or even if it's possible. Anyone who wants to adjust this is smart enough to avoid WinME
    • win2k: after right clicking my computer and selecting properties, it's a setting hidden somewhere in the hardware tab, provided you're running the latest SP.
    • win98: same as win2k, except a reboot is required afterwards
    • XP: same as win2k, except a defrag is required afterwards. Also, Teletubbies color schema.
    • win vista: back to rebooting. The change may not have been applied. It will not tell you either way.
    • win 7: finally they made it functional and easily accessible via the control panel
    • win 8: uh oh, the control panel of ye olden days is no more. We have a new thing going, so there are two way of doing it. The newer method isn't quite as flexible as the old control panel, though; you need to regedit for proper brumblebork.
    • win 8.1: They fixed the new panel, but you can't fit it on a single screen due to excessive dead space padding. And sometimes you get told to contact the sysadmin. For your computer. That you own.
    • Win 10: It fits on one screen now, you just have a million sub-menus to navigate through; control panel -> network -> advanced -> skoodleblurp -> advanced -> thingamajig -> advanced (yep, again) -> ratio slider -> apply -> OK -> submit -> execute -> "are you sure?" -> (three minutes of that nondes ript spinning circle that replaced the hour glass) -> Fuck you, you forgot to check the brumblebork box half an hour ago. At this point it's easier to get WSL up and running and then run
      skoodle -s thinga 50 --method=brumblebork (method not implied. WSL isn't that good)
    • Win 11: you have to log in to support.microsoft.com with your Microsoft account, using edge, and hope it has detected that you are running an OS that supports this. Then you can download a service patch that may or may not be relevant. Either way it changes your default search to fucking Bing.
    v4ld1z@lemmy.zipV 1 Reply Last reply
    41
    • kruhmaster@sh.itjust.worksK [email protected]

      FFS JUST TURN IT OFF

      S This user is from outside of this forum
      S This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote on last edited by
      #11

      Then Windows takes five minutes to start and another fifteen to become stable

      kruhmaster@sh.itjust.worksK 1 Reply Last reply
      7
      • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]

        Braces himself for the influx of Linux users

        _lilith@lemmy.world_ This user is from outside of this forum
        _lilith@lemmy.world_ This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #12

        Had to change the access policy for the windows update file so windows would stop trying to download 11 on my last windows box. Every now and then it still tries to update and shits itself because it's not allowed.

        S 1 Reply Last reply
        2
        • I [email protected]

          And then there's me who's been running an old build of Ameliorated (21H1) without windows update

          R This user is from outside of this forum
          R This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by
          #13

          Congrats on opening yourself up to countless vulenerabilities

          I 1 Reply Last reply
          3
          • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]

            Braces himself for the influx of Linux users

            sundray@lemmus.orgS This user is from outside of this forum
            sundray@lemmus.orgS This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote on last edited by
            #14

            Windows: "I need to update!"

            20 minutes later

            Windows: "Oops, I failed!"

            User: "WHY?!"

            Windows: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

            1 Reply Last reply
            25
            • M [email protected]

              Windows users: Windows work just fine, nobody asked you!

              And then proceed to make another dozen of memes with problems even more annoying than this.

              sundray@lemmus.orgS This user is from outside of this forum
              sundray@lemmus.orgS This user is from outside of this forum
              [email protected]
              wrote on last edited by
              #15

              Windows work just fine

              Lol, not at my job. Whatever Microsoft got right, the boss's spyware breaks over its knee.

              1 Reply Last reply
              4
              • I [email protected]

                You: post this meme

                Linux users: you just activated my trap card! I use arch btw

                sundray@lemmus.orgS This user is from outside of this forum
                sundray@lemmus.orgS This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #16

                Oh, are there Linux users here? Hi, welcome!

                I use Manjaro, btw

                *ducks*

                B 1 Reply Last reply
                11
                • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]

                  Braces himself for the influx of Linux users

                  O This user is from outside of this forum
                  O This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #17

                  simply presses the restart without updating button

                  skulblaka@sh.itjust.worksS user224@lemmy.sdf.orgU 2 Replies Last reply
                  4
                  • S [email protected]

                    Then Windows takes five minutes to start and another fifteen to become stable

                    kruhmaster@sh.itjust.worksK This user is from outside of this forum
                    kruhmaster@sh.itjust.worksK This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #18

                    USE AN SSD WHAT THE FUCK MAN IT'S 2025

                    S P 2 Replies Last reply
                    2
                    • kruhmaster@sh.itjust.worksK [email protected]

                      USE AN SSD WHAT THE FUCK MAN IT'S 2025

                      S This user is from outside of this forum
                      S This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #19

                      But SSDs don't have the satisfying clicky grindy sounds

                      kruhmaster@sh.itjust.worksK 1 Reply Last reply
                      6
                      • kruhmaster@sh.itjust.worksK [email protected]

                        USE AN SSD WHAT THE FUCK MAN IT'S 2025

                        P This user is from outside of this forum
                        P This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #20

                        That was before windows start using React for a start menu.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        2
                        • R [email protected]

                          Congrats on opening yourself up to countless vulenerabilities

                          I This user is from outside of this forum
                          I This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #21

                          I am aware, but I think I rather stick with an unsafe system than a spying but 'secure' system. New Ameliorated versions accounted that and you can update whenever you like. I just haven't gone through the trouble of a fresh install..

                          R 1 Reply Last reply
                          1
                          • _lilith@lemmy.world_ [email protected]

                            Had to change the access policy for the windows update file so windows would stop trying to download 11 on my last windows box. Every now and then it still tries to update and shits itself because it's not allowed.

                            S This user is from outside of this forum
                            S This user is from outside of this forum
                            [email protected]
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #22

                            Why not just turn off TPM in the BIOS?

                            R 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • O [email protected]

                              simply presses the restart without updating button

                              skulblaka@sh.itjust.worksS This user is from outside of this forum
                              skulblaka@sh.itjust.worksS This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #23

                              I have never, not once, had this not just immediately begin updating anyway.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              4
                              • S [email protected]

                                Why not just turn off TPM in the BIOS?

                                R This user is from outside of this forum
                                R This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #24

                                My TPM is off, it still bugs me about updating to windows 11. Thats okay I've been dual booting bazzite and really only use windows for a couple of games that I havent figured out how to get running yet

                                S A 2 Replies Last reply
                                0
                                • S [email protected]

                                  But SSDs don't have the satisfying clicky grindy sounds

                                  kruhmaster@sh.itjust.worksK This user is from outside of this forum
                                  kruhmaster@sh.itjust.worksK This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #25

                                  Enjoy your lost data 🤣

                                  S 1 Reply Last reply
                                  1
                                  • R [email protected]

                                    My TPM is off, it still bugs me about updating to windows 11. Thats okay I've been dual booting bazzite and really only use windows for a couple of games that I havent figured out how to get running yet

                                    S This user is from outside of this forum
                                    S This user is from outside of this forum
                                    [email protected]
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #26

                                    It might have made the check for eligibility before you managed to turn it off. I guess relying on Bazzite is the correct option.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    1
                                    • O [email protected]

                                      simply presses the restart without updating button

                                      user224@lemmy.sdf.orgU This user is from outside of this forum
                                      user224@lemmy.sdf.orgU This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #27

                                      There's different levels:

                                      1. Shutdown at UEFI splash
                                      2. Long press power button
                                      3. Unplug PC
                                      4. Turn off PSU
                                      5. Turn off extension cord
                                      6. Turn off room's breaker
                                      7. Turn off main breaker
                                      8. Cut off the power lines
                                      9. Shutdown the power plant
                                      10. Declare war on any community using electricity
                                      11. Declare war on thunder clouds
                                      12. Destroy everything with electrons (total annihilation of the world)
                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      3
                                      • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]

                                        Braces himself for the influx of Linux users

                                        V This user is from outside of this forum
                                        V This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #28

                                        At least Windows fucking tells you before you hit the restart button. The other day at work I went to reboot a users MacBook and was hit with a surprise 30 minute update.

                                        Goes without saying "something something Linux superiority"

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        14
                                        • stamets@lemmy.worldS [email protected]

                                          Braces himself for the influx of Linux users

                                          remembertheapollo_@lemmy.worldR This user is from outside of this forum
                                          remembertheapollo_@lemmy.worldR This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                                          #29

                                          Turn off automatic update.

                                          You can restart without updating, it’s literally a menu option.

                                          Non-problem solved.

                                          L 1 Reply Last reply
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