Piss Post
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Wait until you get food poisoning 🫠 hopefully you have a tub beside your toilet.
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I imagine it would take a great deal of both mental and physical fortitude in order to curl one out whilst standing tall.
You never see someone taking a shit while running at full speed. -George Carlin
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Wait until you get food poisoning 🫠 hopefully you have a tub beside your toilet.
Oh man, I used to get gastroenteritis every few weeks before I found out what was causing it.
Gastro was horrible. When the astonishingly painful cramps hit you you didn't know which way the 'projectiles' were evacuating from until the very last second.Unfortunately the toilet in my house at that time was in a separate room as the sink and bath. Which meant if I needed to throw up I'd either have to do it in the horrible diarrhea covered toilet or just throw up on the floor.
Decisions decisions.
On the really bad episodes I would just sit in the bath for hours on end so I could turn the shower on to wash the puke and/or shit away.Fortunately I haven't had an episode in twenty years now.
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pissing while pissing
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Oh man, I used to get gastroenteritis every few weeks before I found out what was causing it.
Gastro was horrible. When the astonishingly painful cramps hit you you didn't know which way the 'projectiles' were evacuating from until the very last second.Unfortunately the toilet in my house at that time was in a separate room as the sink and bath. Which meant if I needed to throw up I'd either have to do it in the horrible diarrhea covered toilet or just throw up on the floor.
Decisions decisions.
On the really bad episodes I would just sit in the bath for hours on end so I could turn the shower on to wash the puke and/or shit away.Fortunately I haven't had an episode in twenty years now.
What was causing it?
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According to this, always be shitting and you'll never have a bad time.
Unless you do it while farting
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According to this, always be shitting and you'll never have a bad time.
A-B-S. A-always, B-be, S-shitting. Always be shitting! Always be shitting!! A-I-D-A. Attention, interest, decision, action. Attention -- do I have your attention? Interest -- are you interested? I know you are because it's shit or walk. You shit or you hit the bricks! Decision -- have you made your decision for Christ?!! And action. A-I-D-A; get out there!! You got the turtlehead comin' out; you think they came out to take a look around? Guy doesn't sit on the toilet unless he wants to shit. Sitting there waiting to deliver the goods! Are you gonna take it? Are you man enough to take it? (to Moss) What's the problem pal?
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Why is pissing while pissing more happy than shitting while shitting or farting while farting.
Wait... I get it now.
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I have never before seen such a perfect chart
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Why is pissing while pissing more happy than shitting while shitting or farting while farting.
Wait... I get it now.
I don’t please explain
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A-B-S. A-always, B-be, S-shitting. Always be shitting! Always be shitting!! A-I-D-A. Attention, interest, decision, action. Attention -- do I have your attention? Interest -- are you interested? I know you are because it's shit or walk. You shit or you hit the bricks! Decision -- have you made your decision for Christ?!! And action. A-I-D-A; get out there!! You got the turtlehead comin' out; you think they came out to take a look around? Guy doesn't sit on the toilet unless he wants to shit. Sitting there waiting to deliver the goods! Are you gonna take it? Are you man enough to take it? (to Moss) What's the problem pal?
wrote last edited by [email protected]Oh my God, is this a script except? I honestly thought you might be insane until the "(to Moss)"
Always be shitting does sound familiar...
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Oh my God, is this a script except? I honestly thought you might be insane until the "(to Moss)"
Always be shitting does sound familiar...
I modified Alec Baldwin's "Always Be Closing" speech from Glengarry Glenross. If you haven't seen it, it's good.
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I don’t please explain
Oh... Don't worry about it. Its just me taking the piss.
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I don’t please explain
If your intent in the bathroom is the left label, the face is the one you make when the top label happens.
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Oh... Don't worry about it. Its just me taking the piss.
Just make sure to put it back when you're done
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A-B-S. A-always, B-be, S-shitting. Always be shitting! Always be shitting!! A-I-D-A. Attention, interest, decision, action. Attention -- do I have your attention? Interest -- are you interested? I know you are because it's shit or walk. You shit or you hit the bricks! Decision -- have you made your decision for Christ?!! And action. A-I-D-A; get out there!! You got the turtlehead comin' out; you think they came out to take a look around? Guy doesn't sit on the toilet unless he wants to shit. Sitting there waiting to deliver the goods! Are you gonna take it? Are you man enough to take it? (to Moss) What's the problem pal?
PUT...THE TP...DOWN! TP is for SHITTERS.
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Just make sure to put it back when you're done
NEVER!
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Farting while pissing is cool though
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Sitting to pee instantly solves half of these
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If your intent in the bathroom is the left label, the face is the one you make when the top label happens.
But why is she so happy to be peeing while peeing?