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  3. What strict parents actually teach

What strict parents actually teach

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  • B [email protected]

    What is FFF?

    otter@lemmy.dbzer0.comO This user is from outside of this forum
    otter@lemmy.dbzer0.comO This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote on last edited by
    #10

    Fight/Flight/Freeze (though, some even add Fawn to that)

    B regedit@feddit.onlineR 2 Replies Last reply
    8
    • stinerman@midwest.socialS [email protected]

      I found out at a previous position that the best way to get my work done was to be short with people. In that case they wouldn't bother me, and I had more time to do my work.

      D This user is from outside of this forum
      D This user is from outside of this forum
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      wrote on last edited by
      #11

      Your comment does not really fit in with all the rest around here, and I'd gladly watch you figure it out

      1 Reply Last reply
      2
      • otter@lemmy.dbzer0.comO [email protected]

        Fight/Flight/Freeze (though, some even add Fawn to that)

        B This user is from outside of this forum
        B This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote on last edited by
        #12

        Ah, okay. I thought you were UAPWE. I was right πŸ‘πŸ»

        otter@lemmy.dbzer0.comO 1 Reply Last reply
        2
        • B [email protected]

          Ah, okay. I thought you were UAPWE. I was right πŸ‘πŸ»

          otter@lemmy.dbzer0.comO This user is from outside of this forum
          otter@lemmy.dbzer0.comO This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote on last edited by
          #13

          I am neither a writer nor an editor, though I certainly would prefer to be united (much less "international", for that matter). 😢

          1 Reply Last reply
          1
          • crazi_man@europe.pubC [email protected]

            The most important office skill was taught by George Costanza: look angry and people will think you're busy working hard.

            A This user is from outside of this forum
            A This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote on last edited by
            #14

            100%

            Unfortunately, looking angry makes us more stressed over time. Still, worth it if I don't have to talk to anyone

            1 Reply Last reply
            4
            • C [email protected]
              This post did not contain any content.
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              wrote on last edited by [email protected]
              #15

              Depends on what you mean by "strict". I think the meme is about the parents who get angry over little things but don't actually pay attention to their kids much - the ones who just assume that their kids would not dare to misbehave. However when I was in high school, I also saw plenty of kids (often immigrants) who had successfully been taught to work pretty much non-stop. I think their parents watched them (or at least their grades) closely enough that they couldn't have gotten away with anything. It seemed to work well - they got straight A's, never got in trouble, and went to prestigious universities. I can't think of a single one I knew who burned out or rebelled (while in high school - I don't know what happened to them afterwards). However, the ones I got to meet were already filtered, with the low- and medium-achievers not admitted to that school.

              H track_shovel@slrpnk.netT 2 Replies Last reply
              10
              • S [email protected]

                Resume Ahh comment

                thebat@lemmy.worldT This user is from outside of this forum
                thebat@lemmy.worldT This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote on last edited by
                #16

                Ahh

                Self-censoring is cringe

                S S 2 Replies Last reply
                10
                • C [email protected]
                  This post did not contain any content.
                  underpantsweevil@lemmy.worldU This user is from outside of this forum
                  underpantsweevil@lemmy.worldU This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #17

                  I mean, I know plenty of kids who learned this without strict parents. School staff, daycare workers, business managers, cops... anyone in authority looking to impose rules also taught these lessons.

                  You'd think nobody on this sub has ever shoplifted before, ffs.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  3
                  • thebat@lemmy.worldT [email protected]

                    Ahh

                    Self-censoring is cringe

                    S This user is from outside of this forum
                    S This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #18

                    I enjoy using slang. Sue me.

                    thebat@lemmy.worldT 1 Reply Last reply
                    5
                    • S [email protected]

                      I enjoy using slang. Sue me.

                      thebat@lemmy.worldT This user is from outside of this forum
                      thebat@lemmy.worldT This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #19

                      Ok, Susan.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      3
                      • C [email protected]
                        This post did not contain any content.
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                        [email protected]
                        wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                        #20

                        This one hits a little too close to home...

                        Also, the word you're looking for might be "abusive" rather than "strict".

                        T agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.worksA 2 Replies Last reply
                        56
                        • A [email protected]

                          Depends on what you mean by "strict". I think the meme is about the parents who get angry over little things but don't actually pay attention to their kids much - the ones who just assume that their kids would not dare to misbehave. However when I was in high school, I also saw plenty of kids (often immigrants) who had successfully been taught to work pretty much non-stop. I think their parents watched them (or at least their grades) closely enough that they couldn't have gotten away with anything. It seemed to work well - they got straight A's, never got in trouble, and went to prestigious universities. I can't think of a single one I knew who burned out or rebelled (while in high school - I don't know what happened to them afterwards). However, the ones I got to meet were already filtered, with the low- and medium-achievers not admitted to that school.

                          H This user is from outside of this forum
                          H This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #21

                          No, it is about the ones that keep an eye on their kids at all time.

                          The kids are unable to do anything unless they find way to circumvent all that bigbrothering.

                          And if they need to lie constantly, they will gain experience in it.

                          A 1 Reply Last reply
                          4
                          • C [email protected]
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                            J This user is from outside of this forum
                            J This user is from outside of this forum
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                            wrote on last edited by
                            #22

                            As the other person said, it really depends on what people mean by "strict".

                            My parents were "strict" in that they enforced a bed time. Now I have better than average sleeping habits. So that worked out.

                            But I've also read about "strict" parents that, like, take doors off their kids rooms, or read the kids private messages, or other nightmares

                            C S 2 Replies Last reply
                            27
                            • C [email protected]
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                              wrote on last edited by
                              #23

                              looks like strict parents are the way to fit into the corporate world πŸ˜›

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • thebat@lemmy.worldT [email protected]

                                Ahh

                                Self-censoring is cringe

                                S This user is from outside of this forum
                                S This user is from outside of this forum
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                                wrote on last edited by
                                #24

                                Every time I read it, I just see it like the momentary pauses that President Obama made in his speeches. Makes it a little more interesting.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                5
                                • J [email protected]

                                  As the other person said, it really depends on what people mean by "strict".

                                  My parents were "strict" in that they enforced a bed time. Now I have better than average sleeping habits. So that worked out.

                                  But I've also read about "strict" parents that, like, take doors off their kids rooms, or read the kids private messages, or other nightmares

                                  C This user is from outside of this forum
                                  C This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote on last edited by [email protected]
                                  #25

                                  Yeah, my parents made us leave our cell phones on the kitchen counter so they could read our texts every night, and they installed software on our computers that took screenshots every 5 seconds.

                                  I wonder why I have issues with authority figures and privacy?

                                  Z H D 3 Replies Last reply
                                  20
                                  • C [email protected]
                                    This post did not contain any content.
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                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #26

                                    Thanks to them I'm master spy now.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • H [email protected]

                                      No, it is about the ones that keep an eye on their kids at all time.

                                      The kids are unable to do anything unless they find way to circumvent all that bigbrothering.

                                      And if they need to lie constantly, they will gain experience in it.

                                      A This user is from outside of this forum
                                      A This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #27

                                      It's fairly straightforward to give a child no opportunity to lie about the things important to the parents, if the parents put in the effort. They can watch the kid come home right after school and sit in the living room doing homework all evening, and the school will tell them his grades and whether or not he's behaving well.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • C [email protected]
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                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #28

                                        Anecdotal observation from college: Lots of people got hammered on a weekend, at least sometimes, but the people who couldn't draw a line and keep it from destroying their grades were mostly the ones whose parents kept them rigidly controlled at home. It seemed like those folks had no practice in drawing their own lines because their parents always drew the lines for them, so when they were on their own they went nuts. The preacher's daughter is a cliche with a lot of truth.

                                        hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zoneH Q 2 Replies Last reply
                                        11
                                        • otter@lemmy.dbzer0.comO [email protected]

                                          Fight/Flight/Freeze (though, some even add Fawn to that)

                                          regedit@feddit.onlineR This user is from outside of this forum
                                          regedit@feddit.onlineR This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #29

                                          Aww, fawn! πŸ₯Ή

                                          otter@lemmy.dbzer0.comO 1 Reply Last reply
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