What strict parents actually teach
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The most important office skill was taught by George Costanza: look angry and people will think you're busy working hard.
100%
Unfortunately, looking angry makes us more stressed over time. Still, worth it if I don't have to talk to anyone
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This post did not contain any content.wrote on last edited by [email protected]
Depends on what you mean by "strict". I think the meme is about the parents who get angry over little things but don't actually pay attention to their kids much - the ones who just assume that their kids would not dare to misbehave. However when I was in high school, I also saw plenty of kids (often immigrants) who had successfully been taught to work pretty much non-stop. I think their parents watched them (or at least their grades) closely enough that they couldn't have gotten away with anything. It seemed to work well - they got straight A's, never got in trouble, and went to prestigious universities. I can't think of a single one I knew who burned out or rebelled (while in high school - I don't know what happened to them afterwards). However, the ones I got to meet were already filtered, with the low- and medium-achievers not admitted to that school.
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Resume Ahh comment
Ahh
Self-censoring is cringe
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I mean, I know plenty of kids who learned this without strict parents. School staff, daycare workers, business managers, cops... anyone in authority looking to impose rules also taught these lessons.
You'd think nobody on this sub has ever shoplifted before, ffs.
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Ahh
Self-censoring is cringe
I enjoy using slang. Sue me.
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I enjoy using slang. Sue me.
Ok, Susan.
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This post did not contain any content.wrote on last edited by [email protected]
This one hits a little too close to home...
Also, the word you're looking for might be "abusive" rather than "strict".
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Depends on what you mean by "strict". I think the meme is about the parents who get angry over little things but don't actually pay attention to their kids much - the ones who just assume that their kids would not dare to misbehave. However when I was in high school, I also saw plenty of kids (often immigrants) who had successfully been taught to work pretty much non-stop. I think their parents watched them (or at least their grades) closely enough that they couldn't have gotten away with anything. It seemed to work well - they got straight A's, never got in trouble, and went to prestigious universities. I can't think of a single one I knew who burned out or rebelled (while in high school - I don't know what happened to them afterwards). However, the ones I got to meet were already filtered, with the low- and medium-achievers not admitted to that school.
No, it is about the ones that keep an eye on their kids at all time.
The kids are unable to do anything unless they find way to circumvent all that bigbrothering.
And if they need to lie constantly, they will gain experience in it.
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As the other person said, it really depends on what people mean by "strict".
My parents were "strict" in that they enforced a bed time. Now I have better than average sleeping habits. So that worked out.
But I've also read about "strict" parents that, like, take doors off their kids rooms, or read the kids private messages, or other nightmares
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looks like strict parents are the way to fit into the corporate world
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Ahh
Self-censoring is cringe
Every time I read it, I just see it like the momentary pauses that President Obama made in his speeches. Makes it a little more interesting.
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As the other person said, it really depends on what people mean by "strict".
My parents were "strict" in that they enforced a bed time. Now I have better than average sleeping habits. So that worked out.
But I've also read about "strict" parents that, like, take doors off their kids rooms, or read the kids private messages, or other nightmares
wrote on last edited by [email protected]Yeah, my parents made us leave our cell phones on the kitchen counter so they could read our texts every night, and they installed software on our computers that took screenshots every 5 seconds.
I wonder why I have issues with authority figures and privacy?
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Thanks to them I'm master spy now.
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No, it is about the ones that keep an eye on their kids at all time.
The kids are unable to do anything unless they find way to circumvent all that bigbrothering.
And if they need to lie constantly, they will gain experience in it.
It's fairly straightforward to give a child no opportunity to lie about the things important to the parents, if the parents put in the effort. They can watch the kid come home right after school and sit in the living room doing homework all evening, and the school will tell them his grades and whether or not he's behaving well.
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Anecdotal observation from college: Lots of people got hammered on a weekend, at least sometimes, but the people who couldn't draw a line and keep it from destroying their grades were mostly the ones whose parents kept them rigidly controlled at home. It seemed like those folks had no practice in drawing their own lines because their parents always drew the lines for them, so when they were on their own they went nuts. The preacher's daughter is a cliche with a lot of truth.
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Fight/Flight/Freeze (though, some even add Fawn to that)
Aww, fawn! 🥹
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strict ≠ abusive
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I try to be a mix of equal parts strict, fair, informative, and supportive, in any order.
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Depends on what you mean by "strict". I think the meme is about the parents who get angry over little things but don't actually pay attention to their kids much - the ones who just assume that their kids would not dare to misbehave. However when I was in high school, I also saw plenty of kids (often immigrants) who had successfully been taught to work pretty much non-stop. I think their parents watched them (or at least their grades) closely enough that they couldn't have gotten away with anything. It seemed to work well - they got straight A's, never got in trouble, and went to prestigious universities. I can't think of a single one I knew who burned out or rebelled (while in high school - I don't know what happened to them afterwards). However, the ones I got to meet were already filtered, with the low- and medium-achievers not admitted to that school.
Strict for strict's sake is bullshit. Holding your kids accountable for their actions, enforcing boundaries, and channeling their energy into productive ventures might be considered strict, but that's good parenting in my book.
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This post did not contain any content.wrote on last edited by [email protected]
My parents were strict about things that didn't matter. They taught swear words and being gay was bad but never taught me anything about surviving life or making money or managing hobbies or anything having to do with self growth or independence.
They limited my ability to grow. Along with society at the time and then blamed me when for it when I became an adult and was socially dysfunctional.
It's weird... If you're not teaching your kids no one really is. They'll end up learning from entertainment or people taking advantage of them. But still people have kids like it's a set it and forget it process and then blame the kid/person for not knowing x thing.
