Everybody gets one [choose wisely]
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There are too many possible things to ask
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hell yeah get me some munchies man
A bright flash. You blink and rub your eyes in an attempt to regain your sight. There, floating in front of you, are two DVD copies of the 1970 comedy horror movie "Munchies". It isn't very good...
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This is a small one, but can you please make it so that all menu descriptions actually list all the major dish components so I'm never surprised by secret onions or mustard again?
Edit: oh no I've been reading your monkey's paw responses.... You're gonna make restaurants disclose everything clearly but ensure that onions and mustard are in every dish from now on, aren't you?
As you say, it has been done; onions and mustard for everyone:
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The magic effect is on the triggering of the process to start to develop empathy. Forcefully. The empathy itself is yours, even after the event. And the magic being. Lets see if they like having a conscience. Does not get cancelled. The event does.
I did not state a temporary duration for the effect of the outcome of the process. There is no temporary clause on that. The time frame is established for the duration of the process.
The event lasts one year. And it is gradual. It is not a snap of a finger and people become highly empathic. Everyone else will have a more accelerated growth, granted, but I’ll be forced to grow in tandem.
Anything that was specified for a duration can be interpreted to end once that duration is up. You never specified what happens after the year. Since nothing is enforcing that empathy after the first year, maintaining it would come down to individual people. And maintaining one state of mind indefinitely is not normal for the vast majority of people.
And what is the down side on the first part of your remark?
You're going to have to empathize with other people to figure that one out. The most people can do during the year is give you a stern talking to. After the year, people are going to feel all sorts of things. Some of which will inevitably be about you. edit: typo
I've been thinking about this the entire day and I think the only answer for any entity offering to magically grant any wish to try to introduce conditions to it would be "no".
Let's just consider it.
The average individual requesting a wish doesn't really want the entire world to change, except for that little sliver they are wishing upon.
We are trying to think rationaly on something that is not governed by it.
Someone wishing for Hitler to have never been born, wants the horrors of WW2 to have never happened but does not want their reality to collapse in the process. The same way, a person wishing for fried shrimp to rain from the sky does not want to see shrimp go extinct or the world to burn due to some physical phenomenon.
They want to magically alter the world, with no further consequence.
If a magical being offers to grant you a wish, any wish, he can not hinder it in any way. It is not a business transaction, where you get something and he gets something in return (usually your misery, through preverting your wish outcome).
If the magical being, as in the case at hand, tries to do it, then it is not a wish but an offer and therefore you are free to refuse.
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A pillow with the perfect height and that doesn't flatten after a week of use.
I chased this for a while. One was never enough, two too many. Got gifted pillows by my wife a couple times, nothing ever worked. Finally found one, and it's been huge. We also put a pad on top of our mattress, and don't know if it's the combination of that plus the pillow, but for the last few years I've used just this one pillow, and it's been great. I take it with me when we go somewhere for a night.
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Whenever someone attempts to make a golf swing, change the friction coeficcient of the grip to zero.
Sure, there is a period of turmoil on golf courses around the globe. Shenanigans ensue. Eventually, people switch to croquet and disk golf:
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A pillow with the perfect height and that doesn't flatten after a week of use.
Done! But I have given the magic pillow to someone else who isn't you. They frequently oversleep and are often late for work:
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Happiness
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Okay, I have now frozen time in the universe. Peaceful eons pass and I move to a parallel universe to escape the boredom:
Goddammit! You know what I mean
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I've been thinking about this the entire day and I think the only answer for any entity offering to magically grant any wish to try to introduce conditions to it would be "no".
Let's just consider it.
The average individual requesting a wish doesn't really want the entire world to change, except for that little sliver they are wishing upon.
We are trying to think rationaly on something that is not governed by it.
Someone wishing for Hitler to have never been born, wants the horrors of WW2 to have never happened but does not want their reality to collapse in the process. The same way, a person wishing for fried shrimp to rain from the sky does not want to see shrimp go extinct or the world to burn due to some physical phenomenon.
They want to magically alter the world, with no further consequence.
If a magical being offers to grant you a wish, any wish, he can not hinder it in any way. It is not a business transaction, where you get something and he gets something in return (usually your misery, through preverting your wish outcome).
If the magical being, as in the case at hand, tries to do it, then it is not a wish but an offer and therefore you are free to refuse.
wrote last edited by [email protected]I'm not hindering what you wished for or adding extra conditions. I'm not taking it upon myself to do extra work.
Me prolonging what you wished for beyond the first year would be adding extra conditions. Same with choosing to interpret it so you would also be affected. Not to mention it seemed you weren't referring to yourself, since you went out of your way to specify whoever granted the wish.
If you had some deterministic thing you wanted to happen after the first year, you should have said so. I granted the wish as written, I also noted my interpretation. If you didn't think through the consequences of your actions, that's not on me. Statistically it's unlikely, but maybe everyone will really love your wish. I wouldn't count on it though. edit: typo
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Everybody's got to fart loudly once a day in front of people.
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A pillow with the perfect height and that doesn't flatten after a week of use.
Of course I know him, he is me.
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Happiness
Your request has given a random depressed person a brief respite from their lethargy.
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5 acres of woodland in the Appalachian Mountains. With a small house on it. Could be 1 room like an old style cabin.
I wanna leave all the bullshit behind. Raise a garden and maybe a few goats and chickens.
wrote last edited by [email protected]You are transported to a homestead deep within the Appalachian Mountains. You see seeds, goats, chickens, some tools, a well, a shed, and a small house. The homestead is magically separated from the rest of the world. You are doomed to survive by the fruit of your toil, stranded for decades without electricity, plumbing, or modern conveniences:
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Two buns enclosing, ketchup, onions, lettuce, pickles, and tomatoes are at your fingertips.
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This isn't a business transaction, where I ask for something and you take something else in return. It is a magical wish.
You don't get to decide how empathy works between people. It is already an established mechanism. Your job is to nudge it to develop at an enhanced rate between individuals in a given time frame.
The world remains the same. Humans remain the same.
So, if this is what you have to offer, keep your offer.
Your mortal understanding is limited. And a hive mind consciousness would be more empathetic, no?
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Hello wise one,
I find the Earth's gravity of 9.80665m/s² a bit much. Sometimes my back hurts from standing too long, and the general weight of existence sits heavy on my shoulders.
Can you make it a bit more comfortable please. Maybe 9.80664?
Sure, I have now reduced the Earth's gravity to 9.80664% of it's previous value (i.e., ~0.96m/s²) by removing material in the Earth's core and mantle. Everything on Earth now weighs less than on the moon. Earthquakes shake the planet, massive fissures swallow cities whole, and the atmosphere begins to disperse into the vacuum of space. Humans barely have enough time to escape to the moon and Mars: the vast majority are left behind. On the bright side, your back no longer hurts:
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Fully automated luxury queer space communism, in the sense it was conceived at (as opposed to you interpreting the words yourself), instantly, with everybody’s belief system magically adapting as if they had lived in this new society for a few decades. As a result, everyone adapts immediately, without negative result on anyone's mental or physical health, and without anyone being brainwashed or changed in a way they wouldn't have naturally changed if they had time to experience living in a community that they can trust and that cares about them.
In other words: Iain M. Banks’ Culture decides to bring Earth in, but magically instantly.
const SIMULATIONTHEORY = true. All humans on Earth are transported out of physical existence and unknowingly adapted to the realm of computer abstracta. From their perspective, nothing has changed: they have always lived in a post-scarcity, interstellar society with a benevolent, queer-friendly, communist government. The current owner of the simulation is startled to see the program start of its own accord, but altruistic enough to allow it to keep running:
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a couple hugs
Two of your friends hug you, but they are magically compelled to not let go. If they are somehow separated, they will always seek to reinstate the hug:
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Everybody's got to fart loudly once a day in front of people.
Uh, sure? Everyone must fart loudly once a day in front of people OR THEY WILL DIE. (I have made it so that everyone is aware of the aliment.) On the bright side, the social taboo around flatulence goes away:
