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So proud!

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Microblog Memes
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  • R [email protected]

    Asking someone to explain something is none of those things.

    P This user is from outside of this forum
    P This user is from outside of this forum
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    wrote last edited by
    #41

    Oh yeah you are 100% right. It was the rest of the comment.

    1 Reply Last reply
    1
    • banana@sh.itjust.worksB [email protected]

      Mansplaining is when you explain a subject to a woman as if she doesn't know it, when she would be fully expected to know it. An example would be a man without an astrophysics degree explaining astrophysics with condescension to a woman with an astrophysics degree. It sounds silly but I've seen it happen, more often than not it happens online though because terminally online people tend to be more condescending.

      Manspreading is more often when dudes intentionally take up more sitting space than they clearly need in public when it's obvious there is enough space for additional people. Often it's a lack of self awareness.

      Male gaze is the way women are most often portrayed in visual arts and media from a heterosexual, masculine perspective, often objectifying them as sexual objects for the pleasure of the male viewer. It suggests that media is often constructed and consumed from a male perspective.

      Hell, even a lot of sexualization of men is from the male perspective. Having spoken to a lot of women about how they experience attraction, most aren't very interested in the hypermasculine view of the male "ideal body" and are far more interested in certain behaviors and mannerisms, or even just the look of their face and hands, rather than everything else.

      I'm writing this not as an argument, but as taking your questions in good faith. I hope it was in good faith.

      S This user is from outside of this forum
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      wrote last edited by
      #42

      What I picture in my head when I hear the term manspreading is the guy on every bus or subway who is sitting in a middle seat with legs spread wide. It could also be arms around the backs of the surrounding chairs.

      banana@sh.itjust.worksB R 2 Replies Last reply
      0
      • banana@sh.itjust.worksB [email protected]

        Mansplaining is when you explain a subject to a woman as if she doesn't know it, when she would be fully expected to know it. An example would be a man without an astrophysics degree explaining astrophysics with condescension to a woman with an astrophysics degree. It sounds silly but I've seen it happen, more often than not it happens online though because terminally online people tend to be more condescending.

        Manspreading is more often when dudes intentionally take up more sitting space than they clearly need in public when it's obvious there is enough space for additional people. Often it's a lack of self awareness.

        Male gaze is the way women are most often portrayed in visual arts and media from a heterosexual, masculine perspective, often objectifying them as sexual objects for the pleasure of the male viewer. It suggests that media is often constructed and consumed from a male perspective.

        Hell, even a lot of sexualization of men is from the male perspective. Having spoken to a lot of women about how they experience attraction, most aren't very interested in the hypermasculine view of the male "ideal body" and are far more interested in certain behaviors and mannerisms, or even just the look of their face and hands, rather than everything else.

        I'm writing this not as an argument, but as taking your questions in good faith. I hope it was in good faith.

        R This user is from outside of this forum
        R This user is from outside of this forum
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        wrote last edited by
        #43

        Manspreading is more often when dudes intentionally take up more sitting space than they clearly need in public when it's obvious there is enough space for additional people. Often it's a lack of self awareness.

        I feel like doing it intentionally and doing it because you're lacking self awareness are sorta at odds

        banana@sh.itjust.worksB 1 Reply Last reply
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        • J [email protected]

          I've had this experience before. I was excited to talk about what I learnt whilst volunteering for a war museum, and wanted to share my excitement with people. Got accused of Mansplaining. It really was upsetting, since I was just talking about a lovely experience and didn't want to upset nor offend anyone...

          B This user is from outside of this forum
          B This user is from outside of this forum
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          wrote last edited by
          #44

          They already knew everything you had to say?! War experts out there I guess

          1 “fun” fact if you got it, maybe one of the less bloody/violent ones 😇

          J 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • grysbok@lemmy.sdf.orgG [email protected]

            My partner has taught/trained me to ask "would you like to hear more?" before I info-dump on him.

            Example:
            Me: "at work today I've been playing around with configuration settings for Primo VE, specifically the search scopes... Um... would you like to hear more?"

            Response: "I'm glad you have an interesting problem at work and no, no thank you."

            vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.worksV This user is from outside of this forum
            vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.worksV This user is from outside of this forum
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            wrote last edited by
            #45

            You are a starship troopers propaganda video. Would you like to know more?

            grysbok@lemmy.sdf.orgG 1 Reply Last reply
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            • R [email protected]

              Can someone mansplain mansplaining to me? It seems like any time someone with a beard inhales sharply.

              Kind of like how manspreading is men sitting down.

              And the male gaze is men looking at things.

              L This user is from outside of this forum
              L This user is from outside of this forum
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              wrote last edited by
              #46

              Mansplaining is when a man & woman have a conversation, he catches a puzzled look on her face with prolonged silence, he proceeds to elaborate & try to clarify the last topic to clear up confusion so she can participate, thereby pisses her off, because she already understood & the man didn't mindread.
              It's basically like any human interaction.

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • sharkfucker420@lemmy.mlS [email protected]

                Unfortunately I am autistic and explaining something I think is cool. Only it gets interpreted as condescension 😞

                Its not always but its often enough

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                wrote last edited by
                #47

                I definitely get the same sorta thing, you just gotta practice managing it. Usually I’ll say something like “I have many thoughts and don’t wanna mansplain but I don’t know your familiarity…” and then ramble. Context is important, and a lot of people also don’t know where we’re at or where we’re coming from so if we just bust down the door and start telling them how something is then that’s kinda on us to manage.

                And if they don’t take the clear opportunities I give them to slow me down and then say I should have somehow known better I ask them how on earth I was supposed to know what they never shared. People will often chill out after that.

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                • B [email protected]
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                  wrote last edited by [email protected]
                  #48

                  gotta love how every time there is a woman voiceing an opinion thats critizising men just in the slightest, the comments are filled makeing sure we know "bUT Not aLL MeN"

                  hot take: if you feel the need to defend yourself from such takes, maybe its time for some self-reflection 🙂

                  sharkattak@kbin.melroy.orgS C isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.deI 3 Replies Last reply
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                  • vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.worksV [email protected]

                    You are a starship troopers propaganda video. Would you like to know more?

                    grysbok@lemmy.sdf.orgG This user is from outside of this forum
                    grysbok@lemmy.sdf.orgG This user is from outside of this forum
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                    wrote last edited by
                    #49

                    Yep! I even use that tone of voice with him.

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    1
                    • R [email protected]

                      Manspreading is more often when dudes intentionally take up more sitting space than they clearly need in public when it's obvious there is enough space for additional people. Often it's a lack of self awareness.

                      I feel like doing it intentionally and doing it because you're lacking self awareness are sorta at odds

                      banana@sh.itjust.worksB This user is from outside of this forum
                      banana@sh.itjust.worksB This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote last edited by [email protected]
                      #50

                      Fair enough, let's just assume most of them lack self awareness, because that makes the most sense.

                      There are definitely some cases where it's intentional, I've definitely experienced dudes trying to take my space on the bus by pushing into my leg that is currently existing in my chair space.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      1
                      • B [email protected]
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                        wrote last edited by
                        #51

                        I explain basic things to anyone if they sound or act like they don't know.

                        J 1 Reply Last reply
                        15
                        • S [email protected]

                          What I picture in my head when I hear the term manspreading is the guy on every bus or subway who is sitting in a middle seat with legs spread wide. It could also be arms around the backs of the surrounding chairs.

                          banana@sh.itjust.worksB This user is from outside of this forum
                          banana@sh.itjust.worksB This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote last edited by
                          #52

                          Yeah pretty much the jist of it.

                          Tbf I see teenagers do it a lot too but their brains aren't fully developed yet.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          1
                          • grysbok@lemmy.sdf.orgG [email protected]

                            My partner has taught/trained me to ask "would you like to hear more?" before I info-dump on him.

                            Example:
                            Me: "at work today I've been playing around with configuration settings for Primo VE, specifically the search scopes... Um... would you like to hear more?"

                            Response: "I'm glad you have an interesting problem at work and no, no thank you."

                            C This user is from outside of this forum
                            C This user is from outside of this forum
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                            wrote last edited by
                            #53

                            Then she spent two hours talking about every single thing she experienced at work and her remarks on them...

                            grysbok@lemmy.sdf.orgG 1 Reply Last reply
                            2
                            • R [email protected]

                              Asking someone to explain something is none of those things.

                              P This user is from outside of this forum
                              P This user is from outside of this forum
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                              wrote last edited by
                              #54

                              BTW I think you are a fine fella. Sorry I didn't say that more. I wish ya the best.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • C [email protected]

                                The meme: A dude condescendingly explaining something to a woman.

                                The comments: Men patting each other on the back for saying it's okay to explain things.

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                                wrote last edited by
                                #55

                                People on each side of the issue can have different opinions on it. Maybe the solution is in the middle...

                                C 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • missjinx@lemmy.worldM [email protected]

                                  Men do mensplain but they do it most if you are a week "cute girl". In my line of work I have to be kind of a bitch (not asshole just not girly), if I'm cute I won't get anything done. Nobody mensplain anything to a bitch. They roll their eyes and just do whater you want fast so you cam go away.

                                  In my private life I'm usually the one womensplaing

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                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #56

                                  Do what I say, not what I do...

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                                  • B [email protected]
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                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #57

                                    "Mansplaining" is sexist. It's the equivalent of saying women are airheads, or gossips, or talk too much.

                                    Is each man expected to just... Assume that everyone else shares their exact knowledge? Would such an assumption not therefore eliminate most communication entirely?

                                    Or what if we decided to divide up groups by something other than gender. Would it be okay to say "asiansplaining" or "jewsplaining" or "gaysplaoning"?

                                    Can a trans-man mansplaining? Can a trans-woman mansplain? Is there a separate category of "transplaining"?

                                    S kolanaki@pawb.socialK samus12345@sh.itjust.worksS D A 10 Replies Last reply
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                                    • B [email protected]
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                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #58

                                      My SO put it perfectly when I apologized for talking too much, she said "it's ok, I know you like to listen to yourself"

                                      And honestly, I do talk to myself when nobody's around and there isn't a huge difference in what I'm saying in either context.

                                      I'm not having a conversation with myself, I'm just kind of thinking out loud.

                                      jackbydev@programming.devJ 1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • A [email protected]

                                        This is just a good approach. I treat humans like cute animals. Not gonna get bit by a bunny and hope it burns in hell.

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                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #59

                                        It wouldn't matter whether I'm infodumping or mansplaining, I would love this response.

                                        Positive feedback pweeese!

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                                        1
                                        • C [email protected]

                                          People on each side of the issue can have different opinions on it. Maybe the solution is in the middle...

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                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #60

                                          One side of the issue: A woman annoyed because men talk down to her, comes up with a solution.

                                          The other side: ?

                                          The middle: ??

                                          C 1 Reply Last reply
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