How old is too old to have kids, in your opinion?
-
When I think of older men having kids I mostly think of how unfortunate it is for the kid.
By the time your kid is 20 his dad will be 72, which would me like, on average he might get 5 more years of having a dad. If he's lucky maybe 10-15.
Sorry to be macabre but it is something to consider.
wrote last edited by [email protected]Other elephant in the room is how healthy is the dad? A super motivated, athletic and engaged older dad is still better than an uninterested, over weight, young dad.
-
I’m 31, my husband is 51, and lately I’ve been feeling some baby fever. For the record, kids aren’t a must for me, I’m genuinely happy with or without them, but I think it would be nice to experience that journey. My husband is hesitant, though. Even though he’s very healthy, active, and energetic, he feels like having a child in his 50s might be too late. He also already has a 27-year-old son, and he worries that the big age gap between siblings would feel strange.
I guess I’m just looking to hear what others think about this situation.
My dad was 47 and my mom was 32 when they had me. Although he was a fantastic dad, my dad didnt have the same energy as all of my friends' dads, and that was always obvious. He really only was able to bike ride with us until I was maybe like 8 or 9.
My dad had some health complications when I was a teenager, and he died when he was 61 and I was 15. Really messed me up for awhile. Of course I miss him and wish he hadn't gone when he did, but when I think about it, I realize that he'd be 78 if he was still been alive today. Not sure that I would be able to handle caring for my aging dad at 31, considering how overwhelmed I currently am with my life.
It's certainly doable, but I don't think its a great idea - especially if youre kinda indifferent about it and your husband is leaning no.
-
Yeah, a 5-10 year gap might be the biggest danger zone. Too far to play together, too close to not both be "the kids". And then it varies just by what kind of people they both turn out to be.
Or worse, you risk being parentified. My ex was 7 years older then her brother, and to this day their only bad blood is that she had to take care of him while he got anything he wanted.
