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  3. Foolproof advice

Foolproof advice

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Lemmy Shitpost
lemmyshitpost
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  • kolanaki@pawb.socialK [email protected]

    "Are you ovulating? I have cheese if you are."

    S This user is from outside of this forum
    S This user is from outside of this forum
    [email protected]
    wrote last edited by
    #28

    Yes, that one there officer. He tried to put a Kraft Single in my bra.

    lime@feddit.nuL 1 Reply Last reply
    29
    • S [email protected]

      Yes, that one there officer. He tried to put a Kraft Single in my bra.

      lime@feddit.nuL This user is from outside of this forum
      lime@feddit.nuL This user is from outside of this forum
      [email protected]
      wrote last edited by
      #29

      no wonder it didn't work, that's not even cheese

      asidonhopo@lemmy.worldA 1 Reply Last reply
      24
      • S [email protected]
        This post did not contain any content.
        B This user is from outside of this forum
        B This user is from outside of this forum
        [email protected]
        wrote last edited by
        #30

        "No, stop, where are you going? I have it on very good authority that you enjoy this!"

        1 Reply Last reply
        2
        • B [email protected]

          Lol. I hoped that would be obvious.

          T This user is from outside of this forum
          T This user is from outside of this forum
          [email protected]
          wrote last edited by
          #31

          Hi. Welcome to the Internet.

          C 1 Reply Last reply
          5
          • S [email protected]

            We all know that won't work. Try this instead.

            bluelinebae@midwest.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
            bluelinebae@midwest.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
            [email protected]
            wrote last edited by [email protected]
            #32

            That shoe one just reminded me that when we bought our house and had to start renovations on it, the attic had lots of women's shoes. Just one shoe from a pair and all different shoes. I have so many questions for the previous owner, but unfortunately they are no longer with us.

            S E 2 Replies Last reply
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            • S [email protected]
              This post did not contain any content.
              S This user is from outside of this forum
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              wrote last edited by
              #33

              Suckers gonna suck

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • S [email protected]

                We all know that won't work. Try this instead.

                washedupcynic@lemmy.caW This user is from outside of this forum
                washedupcynic@lemmy.caW This user is from outside of this forum
                [email protected]
                wrote last edited by
                #34

                Fun fact, the digestion of milk/cheese creates casomorphins from caesin, one of the most prominent peptides in milk. Casomorphins can activate opioid receptors. Giving a woman a slice of cheese might work in your benefit if she eats the cheese.

                F 1 Reply Last reply
                7
                • S [email protected]

                  We all know that won't work. Try this instead.

                  F This user is from outside of this forum
                  F This user is from outside of this forum
                  [email protected]
                  wrote last edited by
                  #35

                  I like the idea that these are all steps to one process. Like, you gotta steal her shoe and some hair and pins, and the best distraction is with cheese.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  3
                  • I [email protected]

                    Lol who wrote this, Ben Shapiro?

                    D This user is from outside of this forum
                    D This user is from outside of this forum
                    [email protected]
                    wrote last edited by [email protected]
                    #36

                    It's typo progressive for him. He's the "your wife shouldn't get wet" type.

                    Edit: autocorrect fail in the worst/best way there

                    O 1 Reply Last reply
                    6
                    • B [email protected]

                      Lol. I hoped that would be obvious.

                      cruxifux@feddit.nlC This user is from outside of this forum
                      cruxifux@feddit.nlC This user is from outside of this forum
                      [email protected]
                      wrote last edited by
                      #37

                      Kids these days don’t remember the internet before /s, where you had to use context to tell of someone was being sarcastic or not.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      4
                      • lime@feddit.nuL [email protected]

                        no wonder it didn't work, that's not even cheese

                        asidonhopo@lemmy.worldA This user is from outside of this forum
                        asidonhopo@lemmy.worldA This user is from outside of this forum
                        [email protected]
                        wrote last edited by
                        #38

                        Nilered did a video on this, it's technically at least cheese-adjacent

                        https://youtu.be/0aGNAxN5Z-o

                        lime@feddit.nuL kolanaki@pawb.socialK 2 Replies Last reply
                        4
                        • S [email protected]
                          This post did not contain any content.
                          T This user is from outside of this forum
                          T This user is from outside of this forum
                          [email protected]
                          wrote last edited by
                          #39

                          I feel sorry for any guy dumb enough to try this. Also my friends mom when i was 13 vacuumed every day and rearranged all furniture and vacuumed behind everything once a week.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          5
                          • S [email protected]
                            This post did not contain any content.
                            S This user is from outside of this forum
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                            wrote last edited by
                            #40

                            Rings true to me. My wife never vacuums and is past menopause.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            9
                            • S [email protected]
                              This post did not contain any content.
                              M This user is from outside of this forum
                              M This user is from outside of this forum
                              [email protected]
                              wrote last edited by
                              #41

                              My wife always, always wanted pasta right before her period. It was always a good warning flag for her/us. So, this thread is a bit believable, …for me.

                              T M ethaver@kbin.earthE 3 Replies Last reply
                              2
                              • asidonhopo@lemmy.worldA [email protected]

                                Nilered did a video on this, it's technically at least cheese-adjacent

                                https://youtu.be/0aGNAxN5Z-o

                                lime@feddit.nuL This user is from outside of this forum
                                lime@feddit.nuL This user is from outside of this forum
                                [email protected]
                                wrote last edited by
                                #42

                                i mean, so is grass

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                9
                                • K [email protected]

                                  Written by Coolguy Sexhaver.

                                  C This user is from outside of this forum
                                  C This user is from outside of this forum
                                  [email protected]
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #43

                                  No relation.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  18
                                  • cruxifux@feddit.nlC [email protected]

                                    This has to be satire.

                                    A This user is from outside of this forum
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                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #44

                                    I thought so too until I went to the website and I still couldn't tell 😕

                                    cruxifux@feddit.nlC 1 Reply Last reply
                                    4
                                    • M [email protected]

                                      My wife always, always wanted pasta right before her period. It was always a good warning flag for her/us. So, this thread is a bit believable, …for me.

                                      T This user is from outside of this forum
                                      T This user is from outside of this forum
                                      [email protected]
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #45

                                      I pretty much always want pasta... Maybe I'm always experiencing menses.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • A [email protected]

                                        I thought so too until I went to the website and I still couldn't tell 😕

                                        cruxifux@feddit.nlC This user is from outside of this forum
                                        cruxifux@feddit.nlC This user is from outside of this forum
                                        [email protected]
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #46

                                        There’s lots of really fucking stupid people out there so who knows.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        4
                                        • M [email protected]

                                          My wife always, always wanted pasta right before her period. It was always a good warning flag for her/us. So, this thread is a bit believable, …for me.

                                          M This user is from outside of this forum
                                          M This user is from outside of this forum
                                          [email protected]
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #47

                                          hang on, I feel there could be false positives there. Did she ever want pasta when she wasn't on her period?

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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